Hiya,
I'm 18 yrs old and have a very low self-Esteem problem I've tried every diet and Exercise but can't seem to lose weight.I'm always worried about what other people think and see about me I'm always worried they might think I'm fat and ugly. I have thin friends and they have loads attention from men because they are tall thin and pretty,Sorry if this sounds like I'm feeling sorry for myself but all I wanna do and always wanted to do was lose some weight and get more toned I'm not big but I'm not thin which makes its harder to lose weight. But it's come to the point were I'm not eating anything and asking for tips on how to become anorexic/bulimic because I think that would be a way out for me I've got so many problems that also link up to why I have low self-Esteem I think harming my body and losing weight this way will be better for me. If you have anything to help me lose weight please could you tell me. thanks.x

[This message has been edited by Jodebra (edited 07-01-2003).]

Try cutting out 500 calories per day to lose 1 pound a week. It's safe to lose 1 to 2 pounds per week. Add in a lot of cardio like running and swimming, etc. and weight train about 3x per week if you want. You can do this!! Switch all sodas you are drinking to diet, eliminate all sugars, junk foods, and sweets, lower your carbs (reduce intake of breads/pasta) and drink plenty of water as well as take a multivitamin! The process will be gradual but eventually you will begin to see results. If you do this religiously over the summer you could lose a lot. If you are still having trouble maybe you could visit your doctor because it may be something internally, like your thyroid, for example that is keeping you from losing it. Just hang in there!! Don't become bulimic or anorexic, it really affects your heart and much of the weight lost would be muscle or water, leaving you tired and weak. I have a friend with ana and bulimia and she is now hospitalized and very sick, with many heart problems, pretty much dying. http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/frown.gif Good luck and you can do this!!

why not try a supplement. . . i heard hydrocut works

Before you decide to puke up your food, think of the millions of people around the world who are starving or struggling just to get enough food to live a scarce existence. I'm sure you've got a mission in life, and I'm guessing its not bulemia. Good luck and may God bless you.

-Ramsemonius

I have been in your shoes. It's easy for me to look back on it and think about how stupid I was. At the time, though, it seemed like the best plan. Let me tell you something- being that was in high school has screwed my body and metabolism up so much. Not to mention my self-esteem and feelings about food.

I ate almost nothing in high school. I ate rice cakes and drank Diet Coke. That's IT. When I started eating normally in college, I put on a needed 10 pounds. THEN, I turned 25. Metabolism slowed, I started taking anti-depressants, and though I hadn't changed my diet, I gained 30 pounds. If I hadn't screwed up my metabolism as a teenager by starving myself, by body probably could have handled the changes it went though when I got older.

Now, I have just lost 20 pounds the healthy way. I have been cheating on my "diet" for 2 weeks and have gained nothing. It really pays off to loose it the healthy way. I know it's slow and a pain, but you will find that it not only makes your body look better, but you will feel better because you are treating your body the way God meant for it to be treated.

Remember, your body is a temple- treat it that way- with respect and love.

Sorry for the hippie moment- but I felt I had to speak to this due to my similar experience.

You really dont want to put your body threw what you are thinking on doing. In the long run you are going to have lots of health problems. Its also going to cause you to be sick all the time. Its not worth starving your body and throwing up all the time just to be thin. First you really need to dig deep inside of you and find your self. The first step to weight loss is that you got to start liking you for you. You need to step in the mirror every day and tell your self that you are great just the way you are. That you are worth living and that you dont need to do harm to your self. You shouldnt be so hard on your self. I think if you were to joins some support groups that you will start to feel better about your self. Every morning get up and start exercise and learn more on how to eat healthy. I know that when I exercise I start to feel better about myself. Set some goals and work really hard on those goals. Once you start telling your self that you are great the way you are you will feel better and people will see a change in you. I wish you the best of luck. Just remember to keep your chin up high.

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First of all, is this really a weight problem? It sounds as though you've got a lot more going on then just getting toned up. I think that even if you magically had the body you want you'd still have some problems that would stop you from feeling good about yourself. Personally I think you should try to examine what's bugging you otherh than your weight. Is there someone you can talk to? A counselor or older friend perhaps?

You want to be careful about how you approach getting in shape (which is what it sounds like what you really want to do rather than just be skinny). If you do your homework now and get into good, healthy habits the pay off will be worth it not just now, but years down the road.

Best of luck to you, and please don't go starving yourself or throwing up. You and your body deserve better.

Hmmmm... I can see what you mean by saying, maybe it would be better for you to harm your body and starve yourself. This doesn' t mean i agree with it, it just shows how desperately you feel about how things are NOW. Like anything would be better than this, right? As a former anorexic I can relate, because, yes, anorexia does give you the feeling of "living for something" - for a WHILE.
Unfortunately it turns out to be a big fake later. Because in order to remain anorexic, your body becomes OBSESSED with food. And then it doesn't feel like the 'purpose of life" anymore, just very sick and very sad.

I agree with those who say that losing weight the "healthy way" is best. If you have a very slow metabolism and eat barely anything and still don't lose... maybe exercise would help? But start slowly, and if you are out of shape maybe even have a physical check-up first.

I hope things turn out well for you.

Kathrin

THANKS TO ALL YOU WHO HAVE REPLIED BACK TO ME I AM THANKFUL

Hello, This will probably sound crazy, but you might want to try different hair styles and different ways of wearing make-up. Sometimes the right hair style can make a big difference in a person's appearance. Also, some peers can be real pains and even cruel. If you have people doing the name calling thing, I've found it always made me feel better to name call back. If you're like I was and had no boyfriend in high school, because I was too "ugly," keep in mind that the best boyfriends will be found once you graduate. After I graduated high school I wound up with more boyfriends than I could handle, so I guess I wasn't ugly after all. As far as diet...I wouldn't suggest going below 1200-1500 cal. (1200 cal. if you're inactive and short.) Don't even think about diets or counting would even be better. All you have to do is think in single servings. Example: Bkf.- OJ or milk, 1 slice toast with jam or butter, and 1 fruit...Lunch - 1 slice of pizza or 1 sandwich or 1 BIG salad, 1 fruit, and water or juice...Super- 1 protein, (1 serving of fish, beans, an egg, or meat, which is the size of your palm.) 1-2 servings of vegies, 1 starch, (potatoes, corn, peas, pasta, rice) and juice/water...Snack-10 mini pretzels, 1 cup popcorn, 1 fruit, 1 vegie, or 1 scoop of ice-cream. Please, do not use laxatives, diuretics, or fingers down the throat...It ain't worth it. For the self-esteem...That's a hard one, because I still have low self-esteem; eventhough, I have a great bod. I'd say to concentrate on your career. Become career oriented and self motivated, because no one is going to do it for you...Sorry. Best of luck and love.

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Magpie

[This message has been edited by linnybee428 (edited 07-07-2003).]

Please don't do anything that is harmful to you and your body. I understand where you are coming from I am 21yrs old. I weigh 215-220pds, I am 5'5. I have lost and gained back so many times I cant keep count. I have been discoured so many times, that when I step on the scale I cry. I have thought of all the same things you have, but that is a temperary fix not perminent, the only thing perminent is to find a good eating habit and that is what I am starting now. I will not eat more than 1200 calories a day, it will not be a quick fix but a healthy way of life and I will lose the weight slowly but healthy. Also, no man will like you fat or skinny if you dont have any self asteam or confidence. So you should work on that.

Jodebra,

We are our own worst critics. In general people are more critical of their own appearance than others. We tend to think that if see something that is obiviously "wrong" with our bodies then the entire world must see it too. This is especially true when we are in our teens. That being said, I have a couple of questions for you. If answer them, I will have a better idea of what specific advice I can offer you.

What is your height and current weight?

Is there a specific area of your body that you feel needs work?

I think you should use the atkins diet. You will lose weight, feel healthier and undoubtedly be healthier. This will help your self-esteem, too. But realistically, your self-esteem needs the attention first. There are lots of good books out there that will help. You might also try meditation and visualization techniques. Remember that beauty and good feelings really are within and that not everyone is into skinny girls or shallow girls who only think about what they look like. : )

Don't ever use the Atkins diet. It is just a quick fix. Instead, try to keep your calories at least 1200 a day. Never go below that amount or your metabolism will be so slow you will not lose a single pound. If you have only been eating like 600 calories a day, that could be why you havent lost weight. I think I have the same body type as you- not fat but not skinny. I am 20 now, and over the past 5 years, not only have I excepted my body the way it is, but I have gotten much more self-esteem and MUCH more attention from men. I am telling you, just eat healthy, exercise when you can, and love your body! take care of it! You will be much happier.

PS- I didn't have my first boyfriend till I was 16. Don't feel discouraged! After dating for several years, I can say I am Happily married. And he loves my body the way it is- mainly because I love it and take care of it.
Good luck.
Amber

Hey,
There's a great way for you to lose weight, and works for everyone as far as i know... running! It takes a lot of dedication and discipline, but once you work it into your schedule it can become an everyday habit, and you'll have a lot more energy and, lose weight http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/smile.gif When I first started running I wanted to give up so bad 'cause I thought that I would never improve. But I got on a running schedule and started off running about 2 or 3 times / week, to about everyday. I didn't run much at all when i started, maybe a half mile or mile, with breaks in between. But I pushed myself a little further each day and now I love it. You've got to make sure to hydrate yourself well, especially during the summer. But the last thing you'd want to do is throw up your food. I had a friend who got way into it, and yes, of course she lost weight... but she got dark circles under her eyes, she was always weak, and her front teeth were about to fall out because of the acid in the vomit. she became very unattractive, and was so depressed. Sadly i do not know where she is today, but the last thing i heard was she was in counciling. Please don't do this to yourself. Our body is the Lord's temple and we shouldn't ruin it. instead just start to excersise, drink a lot of water, and eat lots of fruits and veggies! Trust me, you'll feel so much better! Hope ya make the right choice http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/wink.gif you don't necessarily have to run, but definitely don't harm yourself, and deprive yourself of food or energy!

p.s. A little tip if you wanna run... if you start to feel fatigued... don't stop! Be tough and run through it :-D whenever i stop if i'm getting fatigued i feel worse off than if i ran through it. trust me http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/wink.gif

THANKYOU for everyone's advice some one asked me how much my weight was and how tall I am well i am 5ft 4 and 11stone. I would love to improve my legs,bum,arms

This may sound stupid, but what does 11stone mean?

Originally posted by FMY:
This may sound stupid, but what does 11stone mean?

Stone is a measure of weight used in the UK equal to about 14 pounds.

Jodebra,

You cannot "decide" to become anorexic, any more than an anorexic can decide to eat normally.
Would that dieting were that easy and could be turned on and off like a switch. As SunKissed said, eat 500 fewer clories per day for a 1 pound per week weight loss.
It might not sound like much but it's 52 pounds a year. Wouldn't it be nice next summer to look back on a spectacular loss like that. Or 20 pounds by Christmas?

Hamer, I don't know why you would knock the Atkins diet when it has worked and is working for so many people who are sick and tired of low metabolism from low calorie fat free diets. Especially with all the research out today! More and more doctors are recommending it.

Since when is a meal composed of either a serving of fish, lean meat, or chicken breasts with a dinner salad considered as unhealthy.

My Atkins diet includes berries, nuts and seeds, etc along with vegies and meats. I don't eat sugar or drink sodas which I feel really are unhealthy.

People using Atkins have reported immediate results in lower cholesterol, triglycerides, lower b/p, etc., plus MUCH more energy.

Maybe you should research a little further before proclaiming "Whatever you do DONT use Akins."

1nitewriter

Take up walking and buy a couple of 5-lb weights and a woman's weight-training tape and work those muscles! It will raise your metabolism and burn fat. Walking is great for the mind, body and soul. It will help clear your mind from your depression and make you feel better about yourself. When I weight-train I can eat more without gaining.

Do you have a friend or relative who also wants to lose some weight? Ask them if they would like to walk with you. You'd be surprised how many people would love a walking partner, and how much better you will get to know them personally. I walk my lunch and breaks at work and have several walking partners, and I love it. It keeps me fit, helps my depression, and I get to know my friends and co-workers better and they get to know me! It also makes you drink more water and crave the good foods, like fruits, salads and vegetables. Try it, you might like it!

Oh, Jodebra, please don't think of doing anything crazy like that! I have never really been overweight, but I was always worried about what other people thought because I have slim friends too. It took many years to get over that complex, but I finally have excepted me for me. It is very important to make sure you eat breakfast every day. I used to never do this because I thought my stomach would stay flatter longer if I didn't eat till lunch. You completely screw up your metabolism when you do all these crazy diets. The best advice I can give you is to not go on any more "diets", instead, change the way you eat. For breakfast try some type of wheat bread (I like organic 10-grain bread) with organic peanutbutter and jelly with a bananna and cinniman on top of it. That's what I usually eat. I literlly eat like every hour. I snack on nuts or fruit. Then for lunch I usually have either a salad or cereal with soy milk. Then again snack all afternoon. I'm very laid back about dinner. I usually have whatever I want. But it is so important to eat breakfast. I also try and follow some of the guidelines for the Fat Flush Plan. You can look it up on the net. It is basically a detox (which I don't do), but I incorporate a lot of what they want you to eat into my eating habits.

Please don't get discouraged and do something drastic. It takes time, but try and eat healty (organic food if you can) and just give it time. I bet after 2 months of this you will see a difference! Also, if you don't already, try a lot of walking. That's really all I can do because of other health reasons, but just walking alone can make a huge difference. Hope this helps.

- Kim

I know how you feel! I have been there myself. I was on Metabolife and then Xenedrine for a while and got great results. Unfortunately I never gave my body a break and ended up with a kidney problem. I gained all of the weight back I had lost (50+ pounds) and then some. I have finally started doing something that I consider to be sensible - weight watchers. It's working too. I just stay within my points and I'm losing weight. I've only been doing it a week, but I feel thinner, I look thinner and even though I'm not weighing myself yet (too depressing), I KNOW I've lost weight. Don't give up and certainly don't do anything to hurt your body. What's the point of being thin if you're dead? Anorexia and bulemia are serious disorders that really screw you up. The only other thing you can do which I personally know will work, is pray along with your dieting/exercising. It's really helped me stay encouraged and focused. You can do it - you can! Just don't expect it all to come off over night, keep your expectations realistic and set reasonable, attainable goals like five pounds or a dress size and when you reach them, congratulate yourself and set another goal. I will pray for you and for your success.

Mary

Thanks for you help guys I haven't and don't want to go through to the stage I make my self sick and ill I'm to scared to But can I also get some tips to slim me down and look better then i am

You don't have a weight problem! That would mean you have gained over 100 pounds extra. You have a self esteem issue and need help, not lose weight! Good luck to you!

I know how people say that if you start throwing up you'll just gain it back once you stop...but i donno about that. im about 110 lb and one time i was 118 lb ...and so that weekend i threw up anything i ate and lost like 6 lb! about a week later i stopped throwing up. im actually considering starting to do that again. i hafta ease my body into it though becuz at first i cant throw up...just gag! so anyways.....if you DO decide to become bulimic, make sure u have the self control to stop when u want to. most likely someone will notice before it gets too bad. earlier this week i ate some mac & chz and was on the phone with a friend, when i told them to hold on....i left it in that room to go try to throw up and when i came back the first thing they said was "you didnt just throw up did you?" its insane! but ya just gotta lie http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/wink.gif anyways hope that helps! and if anyone knows how to throw up without makin ur throat sore, id love to know.

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~*Jennifer Angela*~

Oh, and one more thing. There's a great website out there called fitday.com and it has a ton of great info. You can put any foods you ate during the day and it will count all the calories, fat, nutrients, etc. It also has an activity section (I didn't know that I burn fat in the shower and while doing my makeup...cool!). And sooo much more. Awesome website, and even better, it's free and you can get onto your account from any computer that can get to the internet!

Again, good luck!
Carolyn

this isn't all about weight. you need to work on your self esteem more than anything. omg, highschool was a ***** for me, i had and have gorgeous friends and i always felt inadequate for some reason, but there's a reason why i'm friends with them. we all love eachother, we're wonderful people, and we are all gorgeous girls. just now i've taken up running and i couldn't feel better. I try to do it 4 times a week. it's meditative and so good for you. there's nothing better than feeling confident and happy and THEN losing weight. alsooooo, it took me a long time to go out in public in my bathing suit. I went to the beach the other day and had a blast, what good exercise, and I didn't even know it. have fun with what you do, you're going to have to WANT it, not just want the results.

Thanks everyone I'm doing what most of you are saying I'm taking it easy with food and working out abit thanks for all the support .