Help!!! I have always had horrible teeth and probably as a result of this and many bad experiences I am petrified of going to the dentist. When I go I become so tense that my muscles involuntarily begin to shake. It is not the pain but the noise, vibration, having all that stuff in my mouth etc. that I find intolerable. It's to the point that I would rather have a tooth pulled then a filling. I've heard that some dentists will put patients to sleep to perform dental work and am wondering if anyone has any ideas of how to find a respectable one; what questions to ask, where to look, etc. I am desperate and would really appreciate any advice. Thanks!

Mel, I can relate to you completely. I do feel for you. I use to be the same way, but am improved now, but I'm afraid that what helped me the most may not be very practical for you. I got a job working for a dentist! It was only one day a week for only one year. She was a lousy dentist and difficult to work for and I am unhappy doing sedentary office-type work BUT it served to make me much more comfortable to be in: "THE CHAIR" (3 chords of ominous organ music) myself. I think I got desensitized to that god-awful high pitched drill sound. Here are some other things that helped me as well. I made sure to establish an excellent, communicative relationship with my dentist AND the hygienist AND the office people. This really helps. Just be painfully upfront with him. My dentist is not comfortable working on me when I am very nervous (and I tell him when I am) and will sometimes refer me to another dentist who will 'knock me out' if that's what I really want. Just by him saying this has put me more at ease with him and I have never had to take him up on his offer to go elsewhere for any procedure. Once he gave me headphones and music to help distract me. Kind of obvious, probably, but I always try to picture myself in a favorite place, like the beach or something. Anything to pretend that I'm not really there in "THE CHAIR" (more organ music). Also, not to minimize your fear and discomfort in any way (mind you, I'm with ya' all the way; I understand!) I try to remember that in the grand scheme of things, my time in "THE CHAIR" is very short compared to the discomfort, pain and fear that many live every day due to much bigger problems. Oh, here's what else you might try. Pick up a book on sign language and practice the alphabet and fingerspelling while all those hands and activity is going on in your mouth. It really does take your mind off it; just be sure to tell your dentist in advance that you will be doing that so that he doesn't think an alien has taken over your body. Now I know you said it isn't the pain aspect that frightens you, but my last piece of advice is to remember that novacaine works best when you are relaxed, so....
Well, I hope you can use something here. You did say you would welcome "any" advice! 8)

Don't feel bad, I am so scared of the dentist, that I have to be sedated to get my teeth clean. I had 3 root canals and 3 cavities about 8 months ago, and was totally put under to have all that work done! To me it is definatly worth it!

Okay, I saw your post and I HAD to reply. I am just like you! I am scared to death of the dentist... but I have to go get a tooth removed very soon and yup, I'm flipping out. But back to you! I also heard of those dentists that knock you out just to do regular dental work, even cleanings. And boy, did I ever want to do it! I had a dentist that I hated and was scared to death of. But I just so happened to go to my friend's dentist (because she said he was really good) and I am SO happy with him! You know, a lot of times it's all in the dentist themselves. You may not realize this though. Maybe you could ask around to your friends and family about their dentists. Let me tell you about mine for a second, it's great. I am scared to death of needles, that's a big problem for me. So... he does fillings without any needles! And it doesn't hurt a bit! Not at all! I was shocked! But yeah, he's great. So my advice is, don't spend tons of money to get knocked out everytime, just keep trying to find a better dentist... they are out there. Good luck.

I'd like to join the club of scaredy-cats. I put off going to a dentist for too many years -- then I had a problem....PAIN! When you have pain in your mouth, you don't care who works on you as long as they make it go away! But it led to me finding a great dentist. I blindly started calling people who accepted my insurance. The office I went to was nice from the start. But what helped me get through a 3-visit procedure was this: bring a Walkman with a favorite CD; tell the dentist you are a nervous wreck, but you are trying not to freak out. My dentist let me crank up the tunes and zone out. He asked if I wanted to know what was going on -- I preferred not to. I made appts for first thing in the morning, so I wouldn't spend all day obsessing about it. I also would plan things to think about -- I'd play little games like trying to think of celebrities whose first and last names start w/ same letter -- Adam Arkin, Brigitte Bardot, Charlie Chaplin, etc. Sounds stupid, but keeps your mind occupied. I also kept reminding myself -- it's only an hour!! The biggest thing that helped was plan a reward for after the appointment -- something I really wanted to buy or do; so I'd have something to look forward to. Good luck!