Hi all,

I'm glad I found this board because I have a TON of questions! I haven't received any kind of treatment, but I am definately bulimic. I have been binging/purging since high school 10 years ago. Today is the first day that I've realized how long it's been going on. I don't do it every day, or even every week. I guess I can go months without it. I don't really think a full year has gone by in those 10 years that I was able to go a full year without doing it at least a few times. I do go through periods when I'll do it a few times a day for a few days straight, and then not do it again for some time. (haven't done that in a while, but that's besides the point) Still, I am bulimic.

I was just wondering what sort of bodily damage you all have suffered as a result of your long term bulimia. I've been reading a few things on the internet lately about damage to the esophagus and I'm so worried of something like that being wrong with me and not even being aware of it. I've read that the esophagus lining can change as a result of exposure to the stomach acid and that this can, although rarely does, lead to cancer. I'm not trying to freak anyone out, just get some anwers for myself. I know a lot of people have dental problems, but I haven't really heard people saying they've had problems with their esophagus or throat. I'm freaking out about all the long term damage I've been doing to my body through all these years of on and off vomitting.

Any responses will be sooo appreciated.

My biggest result of my long term bulimia? Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. I have no energy, my immune system is shot to hell.

But other than that!!...no other real problems. Yes, stomache acid can do damage. I take nexium. Lots of bulimics get acid reflux. If you get sore throats or are hoarse, you should probably get checked out.
You shouldn't brush your teeth right after a binge, it grinds the acid in. Rinse out, eat something, then brush and use floride.
Heart problems are common, low potassium.
Although you definitely still have a problem with bulimia, on the positive side you aren't doing it every day or even every week or month. I have gone a long time without bulimia, then it starts again. I don't think it ever really goes away for most people.

eek!!! not as much danger - oh boy. so what if you hadn't throw up for a year and the next time you chose to was the time you burst your esophagus or choked to death on the food coming up or aspirated it back down into your lungs??? It is always dangerous. Stomach acid eats up your insides, it can rot out your teeth, cause sores or ulcers, heart problems- a-fib, skipped beats, an actual heart attack. not a good thing not ever

I'm with maggie on this one. if you're doing anything ed-related, you're putting yourself in serious risk.
I don't know who said it on here, but it really touched a nerve and I've never forgotten it. They said if you have an ED that you're literally dancing with death.

I thought if I didn't have the ED-behaviors but every so often, I wasn't doing much damage, either. Every action has a consequence, remember that.

If you're not resistant to getting help, OUTOFMIND please do it for yourself.
For me, it has to get to a point where I'm not "curious" as to what I could be doing to my body long or short-term healthwise--the behavior of the ED has to end so you're not putting yourself at a risk for developing these life-threatening effects.

You're in my thoughts and prayers,
MG

eek!!! not as much danger - oh boy. so what if you hadn't throw up for a year and the next time you chose to was the time you burst your esophagus or choked to death on the food coming up or aspirated it back down into your lungs??? It is always dangerous. Stomach acid eats up your insides, it can rot out your teeth, cause sores or ulcers, heart problems- a-fib, skipped beats, an actual heart attack. not a good thing not ever


We all know that. I was not endorsing bulimia, even if throwing up "only" once a month. But lets face it: throwing up once a month will do less LONG TERM damage than throwing up daily. But yes, you could die from throwing up just once. But long term damage (i.e. tooth decay) is more likely to happen to a person who throws up more.

Thanks so mush for your replies! I know that this is a dangerous thing, and I don't know why I never thought of it as such. I guess I had the mentality that if I didn't do it all the time then I was okay. Also, the years have just flown by and until just the other day I didn't realize it was going on for so long!

My teeth are a little messed up. Not too bad, they could be better had I not done what I did. I'm sure I'll need some work done. I don't get acid reflux that I'm aware of. Do any of you? Of course now that I've been thinking about it so much I feel every little ping and pang in my body and think the worst. I'm worried about the long term internal damage that I can't see! Like the esophagus damage and all that. I've decided that my life is not worth the risk of doing this anymore and I've scared myself straight, but that doesn't take away what damage might have already been done.

I want to go get checked out, but I'm not sure how to go about doing it. Right now I'm so nervous and anxious about getting checked out and finding out something horrible! I mean, I've been on and off with this for 10 YEARS!! That's a lot of stomach acid coming up! Any ideas on what I should say to the docs so that I make sure they check out the old esophagus real well? I just don't want them to hand me some heart burn pills and send me on my way. I want the whole camera down the throat treatment.

Thaks again, girls. Glad I found this site!

one more questions:

do you all throw up every day? or is it occassional, like me?

People can make excuses for ED all they want - my therapist and everyone and everything I have ever been taught is that ED is bad period there is NO such thing as less dangerous or less damaging - even if you aren't endorsing bulemia a response like CAN lead someone who is to believe a little is ok...

I think you got me all wrong. I am fully aware that no matter what degree of an ED a person has that it's all dangerous. I'm not trying to justify my actions by saying "I only do it a little, so it's okay" I know another post on this thread kind of irked you with a reply that made it sound like everyonce in a while was okay or better than every day, but I just have questions, that's all. Like I said, I'm not seeking any kind of justification for what I've been doing.

My questions were:
Have any of you been diagnosed with problems with your esophagus?

I want to get my body (particularly the esophagus) checked out but don't know how to go about doing it. Any suggestions on what to tell the doctor? Should I just be honest and say "I'm bulimic and I want to see if I messed up my body as a result of it."?

I also asked if others purged everyday or every so often. Not to gauge whether or not I was in less danger of scewing up my body, but just because I was curious.

Thanks for your help

I abuse laxatives instead of vomiting. So, my biggest issue right now is that I've developed IBS and am always tired.

People can make excuses for ED all they want - my therapist and everyone and everything I have ever been taught is that ED is bad period there is NO such thing as less dangerous or less damaging - even if you aren't endorsing bulemia a response like CAN lead someone who is to believe a little is ok...


She knows it is dangerous. I was just talking about long term damage, i.e. to the teeth. NO BULIMIC, except maybe in the earliest stages, actually believes that it is "OK" to be bulimic. We are all smart about our disease, and she didn't take my response as my trying to say it was "OK" to throw up occassionally.

I haven't had any problesms with my esophagus (yet). I do have acid reflux disease and quite badly sometimes, and the acid can trigger my astham (I had a lot of problems with that as a teenager). I do have IBS, which is hereditary (sp?) to some degree as my mom and several other female relatives also have it. And then there is the chronic fatigue.
Some bulimics can go for 30 years and not have any serious damage while others are bulimic for a short period of time and develope very serious complications. Maybe it is like playing russian rulette. You might be the lucky one and you might not.
I would be honest with your doc and say you were bulimic for many years and are worried about your overall health. Tell him all your symtoms. A good general blood test would be a good place to start. Maybe an EKG also.

Thanks so much Natasha. You gave me the answers I was looking for in your last message. I just have so much anxiety since I realized how long I have had this ED, and also since I realized that so much irreversible damage can occur. Every little feeling in my chest and throat I over analyze and think the worst! I'm calm about it to about all to a point, but I still won't be able to rest until I go to the docs and get checked out. I'm scared to know if something is wrong, but if there is something wrong, at least I'll be able to take steps to prevent it from getting worse. What scares me the most is that my grandfather had Barrett's esophagus (from acid reflux) and he later developed throat cancer and passed away. So here I am thinking that I've had 10 years of acid in my throat, so there's got to be something wrong! Know what I mean?

You said you haven't had any probs with your esophagus yet. Did they do the endoscopy on you to find out? And what does your acid reflux feel like and how often do you get it? Just curious.

Thanks again for all your help with this. I'll try to stay in touch and let you know how it all turns out. As for you, I truly wish you the best.

Hey,
My first symtoms of acid reflux was the feeling that I had to burp all the time, a "tight" feeling in the my throat. I (and my docs) thought it was asthma related but it didn't responde to asthma med. I didn't know about reflux disese then and it wasn't until years later that I described this feeling of needing to burp and pressure that I was told I probably had reflux (I did this awful test where you have to have a wire down your nose to your stomache for 24 hrs, also had an endoscopy). If you are not having any problems with your throat, I wouldn't be worried. Do you get heartburn? Trouble swallowing?? If you aren't having probs then your doc probably won't approve an endoscopy...but if you are really worried you could request the test and see what he/she says.
I am sorry to hear about your grandfather's Barretts. Fortunately, we have all this great medicine now, like nexium, that actually heals damage to the esophagus due to acid erosion.
Before I had a full physical and an EKG, I was sure I had every health problems imaginable because of my bulimia. Luckily, all that was found was a minor heart condition that I was told was not caused by my bulimia. My CFS is very bad, though.I would be totally honest with your doc! Just say that you've suffered with eating disorders for a long time and are worried about long term damage. No big deal! I was so scared before I did it, then it was over and I was so relieved. No one will judge you.

Oh...I get the reflux daily. Every morning I have a sore throat. They recommend raising the head of your bed to keep acid in your stomache where it belongs. I also take organic apple cidar vinegar which is great for reflux and other probs like arthritis and colds.

Not to mention your teeth. Even though I'd brush them after throwing up...I had 3 cavaties and the dentist told me those teeth were rotting away. (I have since stopped...for good). Also...it strains your heart terribly.

Not to mention your teeth. Even though I'd brush them after throwing up...I had 3 cavaties and the dentist told me those teeth were rotting away. (I have since stopped...for good).
Also...it strains your heart terribly. You remember Terry Schivo? The comatose woman? She was a bullemic, and one day she had a stroke from it and she was in a coma for how many years (and brain dead).

You're not supposed to brush your teeth after a purge. You are supposed to rinse, eat something first, then brush and use fluoride.
ALSO: Didn't you see the post by the moderator prohibiting us from discussing the schiavo case?? It is inappropriate and we should let her rest in peace. Also, there was NO PROOF that she was a bulimic!!!

Not to mention your teeth. Even though I'd brush them after throwing up...I had 3 cavaties and the dentist told me those teeth were rotting away. (I have since stopped...for good).
Also...it strains your heart terribly. You remember Terry Schivo? The comatose woman? She was a bullemic, and one day she had a stroke from it and she was in a coma for how many years (and brain dead).

You're not supposed to brush your teeth after a purge. You are supposed to rinse, eat something first, then brush and use fluoride.

oops, I didnt see the moderator's rules...guess I'll delete it, though I dont know its inappropriate, I thought we were talking about the health affects of bullemia. (I wont get into a debate b/c its against the rules I guess).
It damages your heart extensively. Just trying to help the living.
The acids still eats away at your teeth. My sis is a dental assistant, I talked to her about it, dentists can tell. Btw the way, I was formerly bullemic and have stopped and have no desire to ever fall in that pit again, so need for proper bullimia hygeine :)

oops, I didnt see the moderator's rules...guess I'll delete it, though I dont know its inappropriate, I thought we were talking about the health affects of bullemia. (I wont get into a debate b/c its against the rules I guess).
It damages your heart extensively. Just trying to help the living.
The acids still eats away at your teeth. My sis is a dental assistant, I talked to her about it, dentists can tell. Btw the way, I was formerly bullemic and have stopped and have no desire to ever fall in that pit again, so need for proper bullimia hygeine :)

It personally think it is inappropriate because there is absolutely no proof that she was bulimic, it was all speculation, and her teeth were not damaged at all. No one knows what happened to her, and it is not right to make her a "poster girl" for a disease that nobody even knows that she had.
I was also just trying to pass along info about the dental issue; not to you, as you say you are recovered....the main reason the teeth get eroded is because of people brushin the acid INTO their teeth after a binge, which is as bad as not brushing at all. That is why you are supposed to rinse, then EAT SOMETHING, then brush and use fluoride. I have had no cavities ever after following these instructions and no dental problems...and am on the road to recovery and hope everyone else will find that road also.

Hi Everyone,

I am a person that has been living with this disease for most of my life. I developed bulimia in my teens and it was very bad for many years. As I got older I learned how to manage it better. It has never really gone away. I have had some health problems. About 2 years ago my appendix bust. I had emergency surgery to remove the appendix and they also found a malignant tumor at the base of my appindix. They took out 40% of my colon. It is a miricle that I am still alive. I have been followed at M.D. Anderson for 2 yrs now. I am cancer free. They happen to caught it in time. I still have problems with my bulimia when I get over stressed. My job is stressful and I can not seem to unwind properly at night. This is a big issue for me. I have a wonderful supportive husband you would think that should be enough to get me through my stressful days. I have even thought of going to a hypnosis. I wonder if that would help. I just need to learn how to unwind and relax and turn my mind off before I go back to work the next day. If I can do that then I think I would not depend on my bulimia to get me through. I still have a ways to go to get better. But I never give up! Anyone have any advice on how they unwind from work.

Hi Everyone,

I am a person that has been living with this disease for most of my life. I developed bulimia in my teens and it was very bad for many years. As I got older I learned how to manage it better. It has never really gone away. I have had some health problems. About 2 years ago my appendix bust. I had emergency surgery to remove the appendix and they also found a malignant tumor at the base of my appindix. They took out 40% of my colon. It is a miricle that I am still alive. I have been followed at M.D. Anderson for 2 yrs now. I am cancer free. They happen to caught it in time. I still have problems with my bulimia when I get over stressed. My job is stressful and I can not seem to unwind properly at night. This is a big issue for me. I have a wonderful supportive husband you would think that should be enough to get me through my stressful days. I have even thought of going to a hypnosis. I wonder if that would help. I just need to learn how to unwind and relax and turn my mind off before I go back to work the next day. If I can do that then I think I would not depend on my bulimia to get me through. I still have a ways to go to get better. But I never give up! Anyone have any advice on how they unwind from work.

Hello!...welcome!!
Did they say that your appendix burst as a result of your bulimia?? I always wondered, as when we binge our tummys get so stretched out and full, it can't be good for the stomache..but I never thought of the appendix being affected.
As for the relaxing part..when I am really stressed the only thing that helps is a bath, with some classical music playing and a little alcoholic beverage!! I soak sometimes for a hour and when I get out, things rarely seem as bad as they did before...Also, exercise can sometimes help.

I am not sure if the appendix thing was related to the bulimia or not. All I know is that I have had very extensive testings at M.D. Anderson and so far everything is ok. I always wondered how much damage I was doing to my body. But for the past several years I have been to doctors and have lots of blood work and MRI scans and everything if fine. I was lucky that the tumor they found was in a place that they could remove it. The bath at night sounds nice. I will try it. Thanks.

Hi all,

I'm glad I found this board because I have a TON of questions! I haven't received any kind of treatment, but I am definately bulimic. I have been binging/purging since high school 10 years ago. Today is the first day that I've realized how long it's been going on. I don't do it every day, or even every week. I guess I can go months without it. I don't really think a full year has gone by in those 10 years that I was able to go a full year without doing it at least a few times. I do go through periods when I'll do it a few times a day for a few days straight, and then not do it again for some time. (haven't done that in a while, but that's besides the point) Still, I am bulimic.

I was just wondering what sort of bodily damage you all have suffered as a result of your long term bulimia. I've been reading a few things on the internet lately about damage to the esophagus and I'm so worried of something like that being wrong with me and not even being aware of it. I've read that the esophagus lining can change as a result of exposure to the stomach acid and that this can, although rarely does, lead to cancer. I'm not trying to freak anyone out, just get some anwers for myself. I know a lot of people have dental problems, but I haven't really heard people saying they've had problems with their esophagus or throat. I'm freaking out about all the long term damage I've been doing to my body through all these years of on and off vomitting.

Any responses will be sooo appreciated. Hi. It took me 11 years to relies that even though I stopped making my self throw up for a week, two weeks, even a year at a time. I have been bulimic the whole time. It's like they say about being pregnant, You can't be just a little pregnant. Same with an ED. No mater how long you've been straight you can never be a little bulimic. I think even if I stopped the bad behavior for the rest of my life starting now at the age of 30 and I die at 80, never making my self sick, I will still have been a bulimic all those years. You can be a bulimic who is harming your self by making your self sick, letting your ED win. Or you can be a bulimic who in will never put your self in harm. I choose to be a bulimic who wins.... you with me?
You are so brave for coming forward and sharing your story I wish you all the best in your journey into a healthy you.....

Hi. It took me 11 years to relies that even though I stopped making my self throw up for a week, two weeks, even a year at a time. I have been bulimic the whole time. It's like they say about being pregnant, You can't be just a little pregnant. Same with an ED. No mater how long you've been straight you can never be a little bulimic. I think even if I stopped the bad behavior for the rest of my life starting now at the age of 30 and I die at 80, never making my self sick, I will still have been a bulimic all those years. You can be a bulimic who is harming your self by making your self sick, letting your ED win. Or you can be a bulimic who in will never put your self in harm. I choose to be a bulimic who wins.... you with me?
You are so brave for coming forward and sharing your story I wish you all the best in your journey into a healthy you.....


I think you're pretty right. Bulimia is sort of a state of mind, too. Even when I am not throwing up, I am thinking of binging and throwing up..so I still classify myself as a bulimic. However, I think that after years of being recovered it is OK and maybe even beneficial to call yourself a "Former bulimic". Some people really do competely recover and stop obsessing over food and weight, but the majority of us stay with your ED's for life even if they are inactive.
How long have you had your bulimia under control??

How long have you had your bulimia under control?? Was this question for me? If so it's been 3 mths since I have made my sick. :bouncing:

Was this question for me? If so it's been 3 mths since I have made my sick. :bouncing:


Hi, Yes,the question was for you and the answer makes me happy ;)
Anything special you did to start your recovery??

Hi, Yes,the question was for you and the answer makes me happy ;)
Anything special you did to start your recovery??
The special thing I did to start my recovery was to first say to my self out loud "I have a problem." Eating Disorders has a sneaky way of making that good voice we all have go way back in our mind which makes it's easy to continue the bad behavior. Like I said I have been straight (not throwing up) before but only because I didn't want people to find out what I was doing to myself. For me saying it out loud in the mirror was a turning point for me.

After a month of not throwing up, but wanting too, I forced my self to think "Why do I want to do purge" and "What caused me to feel this way"? The more I would stop myself from throwing up the more I learned about my past behavior and how to change for the better. I have stared eating on a schedule, not skipping breakfast anymore. At night after everyone was asleep was when would purge. So I find it better to eat breakfast and stick with my schedule so I don't purge at night.
I still have a long way to go, its hard. I'm not getting any Dr help. But you know what? i'm proud of my self for figuring me out. And I truly know that i'm done with that part of my life. It was never a friend so why keep it around?

LOL Did I answer your questian or did i get way off?