Anyone else come from a whole family of addicts?? What is that?? I have it on both sides and wonder, even as I sit here free of opiates of any kind, how long will it last? I want this forever and want to live a sober happy life but as I awake from the fog I see what is going on around me and my whole family outside of 1-2 people are addicts!! And mental cases, like I feel I am at times. I know I have brains, a wonderful sober husband, great boy, but I look at my family, miss them, want to reach out to them but they are all a big big big friggin disfunctional addictive mess. Fighting with eachother, calling cops on eachother, child services, it's sickening!! Thank God I live a bit of a distance away, but this is so sad and depressing and it makes me loose hope. What if it's just in my genes that i'll just be messed up forever??

Hey blurayne,

I bet 95% of the folks here will tell there is a long history of addiction/alcoholism in their families. I can tell you in my family it goes back as far as I can remember on both sides. I distanced myself from those family member, for all the good it did me. I've done the psychologist, psychiatrist, counselor bit over the years to address issues of abandonment by my parents, a child who wouldn't talk to me for 7 years (while living with his father), etc. But guess what, even with all that therapy (and not to mention the money spent on it), I ended up an addict at age 47. Duhhhh, could I be any more stupid. :D At least in recovery, I can laugh about it somedays and cry on others. I've gotten more insight and what I think is the beginning of true good mental health in the rooms of Cocaine Anonymous than in years of therapy. I understand that it is something that I will have to live with and deal with on a daily basis for the rest of my life. I will continue to stay away from those sick family members and want a better life than what they want. I let some of them go over 20 years ago and haven't had one regret over that decision even to this day. I love them, but I let them go. If they ever choose to change, then we may have a relationship someday. You must take care of yourself. If you keep up with my post you know I am a hugh advocate of the 12 step program. It is an amazing, life saving program to me. Have you ever tried it or have any views about it. It's not for everyone but find whatever it is that can help you to live a happy drug free life. I hope you have a good night and hope to see you around more.

blurayne,
I couldn't remember where I saw this thread. Finally found it. Yes..there is a long line of this in my family as well. I've had to distance myself completely. My family is my husband, son, daughter and 12 step family. I still associate in a very limited way with my dad, mainly because I'm an only child and he's burned every other bridge in his life..he's sick and there is nobody else to do things for him.

I think what you describe is very common. As is lots of abuse, childhood trauma, post traumatic stress and the like. It takes alot of stregnth and courage to break the cycle. But I'm trying.

Best wishes on your recovery.

I know exactly what you mean. I have a dad and brother that are both addicts, and as far as extended family- well just about everyone has something they are addicted to. On both sides of my family i have alcoholic uncles and aunts addicted to pills. It scares the you know what out of me, I am terrified that it could grasp me too one day! Do you ever look at really happy or energetic people and think, hmmm what are they high on? I have become such a negative cynical person since finding out about my dad and bro.

Do you ever look at really happy or energetic people and think, hmmm what are they high on?

Your quote above made me laugh. As a recovering addict, I can answer that question for me. Yes, I've thought that many times during my life. But today I can say there are days when I am that really happy, energetic person and I'm high on a clean, sane and happy life. I wish I could have that feeling everyday, but life happens. I understand your fear you have of being grasp by this horrible disease. I can only encourage to keep that fear in the front of your mind if you are ever tempted. I'll tell you, like I've told my kids. Learn from my mistakes. Easy said, not so easy done sometimes. Some of us are hard headed and had to find out for ourselves. I understand the cynical part that you feel. I'm afraid that may be a problem in your future. Work on it very hard, pray, vent, gain knowledge. Have you ever heard of Alanon or gone to a meeting. They are a wonderful group of family/friends of addicts/alcoholics and may be a great help in the recovery of your heart. The pain, fear and anger loved ones of addicts/alcoholics affects their very happiness. I understand your feelings, as I have one son who is very angry, disappointed, etc with me right now after finding out about my addiction. I pray for him everyday. We don't choose to be addicts. I never met anyone who said, When I grow up I want to be an addict". I hope you have a good Saturday and hope to see you post some more.

Alcohol. Many alcoholics in my family: parents, uncle, cousins, etc. I don't like to drink so I thought I'd avoided the addiction thing. Hah!! It began a few years ago with hydro. Then have traded that addiction for addiction to sleeping pills and benzos.

You may never have a problem. I think I'm so scared of alcoholism that I have avoided that one, but didn't see the signs on the others until "too late." Awareness is a wonderful thing and it just might save you from any bad genes you may or may not have.

Have you thought about going to Alanon? I've been avoiding the whole 12-step thing myself, but realizing I need to do something.

Hi
My dad died of alcoholism when he was my age. My grandfather and uncle also died of alcoholism. My mom is an alcoholic.....but both my brothers are fine.
But I am an addict (who was clean for 23 years) and my beautiful 24 year old daughter is an addict (and just got out of 2 years worth of jail and rehab).
My younger daughter is fine.
What a terrible thing to pass to my children.
JJ

Your quote above made me laugh. As a recovering addict, I can answer that question for me. Yes, I've thought that many times during my life. But today I can say there are days when I am that really happy, energetic person and I'm high on a clean, sane and happy life. I wish I could have that feeling everyday, but life happens. I understand your fear you have of being grasp by this horrible disease. I can only encourage to keep that fear in the front of your mind if you are ever tempted. I'll tell you, like I've told my kids. Learn from my mistakes. Easy said, not so easy done sometimes. Some of us are hard headed and had to find out for ourselves. I understand the cynical part that you feel. I'm afraid that may be a problem in your future. Work on it very hard, pray, vent, gain knowledge. Have you ever heard of Alanon or gone to a meeting. They are a wonderful group of family/friends of addicts/alcoholics and may be a great help in the recovery of your heart. The pain, fear and anger loved ones of addicts/alcoholics affects their very happiness. I understand your feelings, as I have one son who is very angry, disappointed, etc with me right now after finding out about my addiction. I pray for him everyday. We don't choose to be addicts. I never met anyone who said, When I grow up I want to be an addict". I hope you have a good Saturday and hope to see you post some more.
I have seen some of your posts in the past, I have a great respect for you as well as everyone else on here. I have heard of Alanon before, my mom goes to them every week. I think I should probably join her sometime! I have educated myself a great deal and continue to read these boards to get a better feel for the life of an addict. I think going to an actual meeting would be more personal and touch me in a different way. I hope you have a great week with lots of days feeling that natural "high"!

Hey ShawnaS, :wave:

It's ironic you mentioned that natural high. Because on those special days when there is a lot of laughter in my life, I actually do get a wonderful natural high. Better than any drug high I've ever experienced. Most of those days are when I'm spending time with my daughter and we laugh together. Tonight after our CA meeting, some of us went out to eat. I laughed so hard at one time, I couldn't catch my breath, tears rolling down my face from the laughter and the more I laughed uncontrollably the more my friends laughed at me. It was a vicious cycle. It's great to have those feelings that I've missed for a long, long time.

Thanks for reminding me of the laughter, I'm chuckling even now as I tell you about it. Have a great day.