I have twin daughters and one is quiet and calm and sits still. The other is funny and talks and loves to learn more and more. This is her first year in a pre-k program and I have gotten three notes home about her. She doesn't like to stand in line, she drifts in and out of line. When it's time for her to go back inside she doesn't want to go. She doesn't pitch a fit or anything. She has a carefree attitude and nothing bothers her. She has a free soul and personality. She's not rude and cute as can be she just has ants in her pants.
These teachers at her school are not qualified AA degree teachers and do not understand children like her I guess. I mean what adult can not handle a four year old. Write her up instead of talking to her and finding out what works. I am so irrate that I have to think about this a few days before I confront the principal. I don't want another note saying my child doesn't stand in line. She's four!! NONE of them stand in line, this isn't military school for cripes sake. She does squirm alot. I don't think she has ADD because she does calm down and loves next to me, she's just soooo full of laughter all the time, I would never give her medication and crush her spirit and I would never label my child either. I think if this teacher is going to teach children then she needs to learn a few tricks of the trade. I substitute at that school and I have NEVER had a problem and I had different children that DO have ADHD, you just deal with them differently. UGH...so what would you do?

I'd tell that teacher everything u just said in your post. Alot of people who call themselves teachers just don't understand little kids. Who in all honesty can expect a 4 year old to sit still all the time?

Does she have to be in school at age 4? Sounds to me like she'd rather be at home playing that being made to sit at a desk and do work at that young age. Most kids would. Why not just have her at home?

Jeannie

I highly agree with PinkPiglet. What is the purpose of putting a four-year-old in an institutionalized setting? A four-year-old is a VERY young child and quite frankly, not meant to be a little robot and conform to all the rules of school. Sure, there are some rules she might learn, such as not hitting others, but the things she needs to learn most at this age can probably better be learned from being at home with mom and simply by playing with other children.

I am a teacher's aide once a month for a pre-k class that my son is also in and when we go to play out side or go to music class; most of the kids fall behind or weave in and out of line all the time. They are just 4 year olds, you should expect that. I think you should speak to the teacher and ask her what she actually means by getting out of line. Is she like getting out of line to go do something else in the hall way, as in looking at bulletin boards or running around? The goal of Pre-k is to get them use to school function. Help them learn the basics before kindergarten. They do need to learn to stay in line and be still in their chairs while the teacher is teaching. In kindergarten, staying in line, being quit in line, not touch others in line, being still in their chairs, no talking during class unless the teacher tells them it is ok, are some of the things your kid needs to do in Kindergarten or you will be getting notes home. Some kids may listen to there parents, but act differently in school. I tell my children to listen and obey the teachers in school and to follow the rules. So when they go to school they know that the rules there are just as important there as they are at home. Yes, sometime I may get a note saying “my kid was told to be quit in line 4 times or he was talking in class”, but that’s ok the teacher is just doing her job in keeping kids from disturbing other kids. I put my son in pre-k so he can learn to be in a class room environment. To prepare him for kindergarten. Teachers send home notes to let you know what your child done that day that you need to talk about with your child. It is the parent’s responsibility to also teach these rules. The teacher is there to teach the children not to discipline them. Teachers are not to find ways to get your child to obey them. They obey by what the parent teaches them to obey. I tell my child to stop talking in line or he will get in a lot more trouble, if he can not obey the rules. I am not writing this to make anyone mad, just that pre-K is the first step into school and class room rules that need to be established and to teach the children the stuff they need to be doing before kindergarten, so it will be a lot easier for them in kindergarten. Your child doesn’t have to be in pre-K, but it is going to be the same in kindergarten. :)

I'm trying to figure this out. Once upon a time kindergarten wasn't even invented. As more women went into the work force, kindergarten was begun. Now people have decided to start with pre-K. Why?????? 4years old should not be expected to stand in line and be quiet. They need to play! Not be little robots. The school system makes them robots quick enough after they are 7 and in grade one.

That's not to say some kids don't enjoy the experience. Most kids however, would rather be playing in the sand or dirt and running around the yard. I just don't get it.

Jeannie

I would ask this teacher directly just what it is in particular about your daughters behavior that really seems to be the real issue and most importantly,just WHY she feels that way.don't even ask the pricipal about this,go directly to that teacher and just simply ask HER.this would be the most quickest and most direct way of actually finding out just what this teachers issues are.I really don't think it is your daughter at all.This teacher obviously feels 'something' isn't right,so just ask her what it is so you can discuss this with her.This really is the only way you are really going to know just what the deal is,you know?let us know what she says,K? FB

Your daughter sounds like my son when he was that age. He is now 8. He's very smart, inquisitive, and high energy. I could go on and on about the funny toddler and age 4 and 5 stages. I read a good book called "Raising your Spirited Child". It was very good and totally described my son. The book gives a lot of good advice. Spirited children are highly sensitive to noise, smell, and commotion. My son is fine and doesn't act up as long as he's stimulated with things that interest him. He really thrived at a Montessori pre-school. He's in second grade now and we recently took him out of public school. He's now in a private school that he loves. The mainstream public school he attended was "dumbing him down". He complained of being bored throughout 1st grade. He has not complained at all about the new school. He's thriving and is a leader in his class. His teacher loves him and understands his personality. She keeps things interesting for him. We are selling our dream house now and get a smaller house in town to pay for the private school, and we drive older cars. He has had teachers in the past who only know how to deal with compliant children and judge spirited children as bad and ill behaved. My sister has told me he needs to be on medicine and has ADD. She doesn't understand because her four children are all mild mannered and pretty compliant. He could also sense at a young age that my sister doesn't like him and thinks he's bad so of course he would act out at her house. I'm not in contact with my sister because she's evil to my son. He's going to accomplish a lot in life. He already knows what university he wants to attend and he wants to be a surgeon. We don't push him on this at all...he's so naturally ambitious. He watches the History and Science channels on TV. He loves to help and isn't lazy. I was such a frustrated mom when he was a toddler but now I see why he was that way. I have an older daughter who is a sweetheart and very compliant...always has been. Compliant children are easier to raise but my husband and I have learned so much about parenting from our son. Sorry this is so fragmented...I'm so tired. Hang in there and always pray for good teachers!

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I agree with ChaoticDiety. My grandaughter goes to a Pre K program at a day care center along with her siblings. She has some real separation problem with me and throws a fit some days, but she is learning the skills she needs to be ready for kindergarten next year. I would rather deal with these issues now when it doesn't 'count' than deal with it next year when it does! She is already going to be enough behind because she will be almost 6 before she starts kindergarten.

Pink Piglet - I am with you! I think they put way too much on these kids way too young! In our state, kindergarteners are expected to know more than I knew in the 2nd grade! I drive the after school bus for the daycare ( just filling in for a few weeks) and the things I hear from these 2nd,3rd and 4th graders is absolutely beyond me! Whatever happened to kids being kids?!