I need help. I have a 2 1/2 year old that still does not speak words. He makes different sounds all day long, all types of sounds. He says car, truck, daddy, come on, a few letters, numbers, but ONLY when HE wants to. He has a little brother who is 2 months old that he won't even look at. He does not follow orders, does not respect NO and is always pulling me and my husband by our pinky to take us to do what HE wants to do. If we do not comply he gets frantic, thriws himself on the floor, kicks, screams, etc...
My mom is telling me that he could be autistic, my friend is telling me that he could have ADD. I am getting him evaluated on Jan 11 but I am worried. Is this normal, is he just jealous?
My mother in law has taken care of him for 2 years and admits that she NEVER talked to him other than let's go outside, lets eat, etc.....

I am concerned and dont know what to think. Could he be so aggressive because he is frustrated that he cant speak? Is he a late talker or can there really be something wrong with him?

Please help...!

I'm afraid that's not typical ....for my daughter I actually wrote down the number of words she said by 18 months ...it was over 200. My boy on the other hand, who by the way is autistic, was like your babes...just a few words. And in my experience with ADD and ADHD kids is that they tend to be very talkative. My advice for what it's worth is get him evaluated straight away and get some supports in place immediately. One Q? why didn't your MIL talk more to him?does she possibly have an un-dxed developmental disorder?I don't mean to offend...that comment just struck me as very odd that's all. :)

Sounds a bit like my son. He talks more than you were saying but not enough for his comfort. He gets frustrated a lot. I know my son is not autistic, because he is extrememly social and makes lots of eye contact. I think your son is just frustrated becasue he is not able to express himself. I think your mom not talking to him his entire life has contributed bit to that. It's hard to talk to them though when they don't respond back. I guess you have to force yourself to keep talking and read LOTS OF BOOKS. I am just toughing it out until he is 4 and things mellow a bit. I know how frustrated you must feel though. My friends DD says 6-7 word sentences and she is the exact same age as my son. Some kids don't really talk until they are 3. After that I would start to worry.

HI

I teach Pre school and also have a nephew with autism and many other disabilities. Also have worked in special education.

Definetly you will get some answers during an evaluation, but what they are is hard to say. Your child could be autistic, but there are other reasons a child may be a late talker and yes that can cause tantrums. A child by two has good cognitive ability and not being able to express themselves can be frustrating, leading to tantrums. The fact that he is making an effort to communicate such as taking your hand is a good sign.

He should be evaluated for hearing, hypotonia(low muscle tone, affects speech, eating and fine motor skills). Also, there are a number of language and communication disorders that can be helped with speech therapy.

NO matter what the outcome of the evaluation, there is a lot of great therapies, medications and other interverntions for children. I taught a toddler child once who cried all the time and had odd withdrawn behaviors, once he got his adnoids taken out he began to talk. Something about sleep apnea. I have also seen other children including my nephew improve drastically with early intervention. Be opened minded at the evaluation. They may throw a bunch of labels and terms at you but don't let that intimidate you. They need labels in order to provide treatment. MOst states have early intervention programs that are free.

IN the meantime, communicate with your chld in other ways. Make picture charts so he can point to things he needs. You can download picture icons on the computer for things like juice, milk, outside, video, etc. and glue them onto refrigerator magnets so he can point to things when he needs them. you may want to get a book about sign language for young kids, which teach basic, easy to learn signs such as more, want, yes, no, bathroom, etc. teaching sign language will not discourage your child from speech as many people think.

Also, your mother says it is her fault that she didn't talk to him and that could be true, but people also tend to blame themselves in these situations out of fear that there could be a problem with their child/grandchild. IF you do think that is the case though, don't hesitate to talk to your son all the time even if it seems he is not listening. Just because he doesn't respond back doesn't mean he doesn't understand.

Good luck for a positive outcome.

Hope2heal

Great advice H2H!....picture cards, signing and I even use home videos to help with learning. Although I don't agree to wait it out rouge....I do agree to "Read Lots of Books"(even if your child tries to push you away). :)