I have kind of wird situation I need some help with. My family moved about a month and a half ago. We moved about 45 minutes from where we were living. The problem is I didn't want to take my daughter out of school and transfer her until after christmas break. She had been practicing for a school play and didn't want her to miss that. Anyways long story short I let my mom keep her at her house mon. thru fri. for that month and a half so she could continue with school there. I had told my mom I would be transferring her to the school where we moved as soon as school resumed in january. My mom was alright with th at and agreed. At the time anyways. Now that the time is drawing closer and my daughter has been home,my mother has been throwing a fit. Telling me it is wrong to be transfering my daughter at such a young age(she's going to be 7 next month). I am still going to transfer her. My husband and I miss her terribly. I wish I could make my mom understand this. It's almost as though all of her kids are out of the house and she just doesn't want an empty nest. I don't know, but I am very sure when I don't bring her back to my moms this sunday evening(school there starts mon) my mother is going to go nuts on me. That's the problem she doesn't know how to just talk, she always acts like a raving lunatic if things don't go her way. Any suggestion how to make my mother understand this with out ahuge fight again. I truly don't want to fight with her, but I can't live without my daughter either.

Exactly that 'you can't live without YOUR daughter'.

I think you have hit the nail right on the head, your mum doesnt want an empty nest, also grandchildren are (apparently) very special, my own mum said she feels so much for my daughters, I really think she loves them more than she loves me (I think this is nice mind).

You have to be honest with your mum, make her feel welcome in your new home too. She is going to miss your daughter, just like you would if you didnt see her.

I trie dto talk to my mom about this tonight and she completly flew off the handle. Started screaming that i'm messing my daughters life up, that she is to young to change schools(mom thinks it will confuse her). Anyways I don't know what to do I knew it waould be a fight and it is. I just can't get her to see my point.

For your mom to think that transfering her to a new school is going to mess up her life is ridiculous. Most children at that age adapt quite well to change. Now if she were a teenager who had developed a lot of friendships, then it would make for a hard transition.

My daughter is 11 years old and she is in her 5th school!!! We have not had a choice in this, but the transition everytime was fine. My daughter lost her hearing when she was almost 6 years old. The county determined right around that time that it would be in her best interest to be put into a program for deaf/hard of hearing children.....which we went with. Well, that program has moved a few times (to different schools). Now this year, she started junior high (new school). So, talk about confusing a kid!!! If anyone were to be confused, it would be my daughter. But, she isn't.

I would just tell your mom that this is your daughter and while you appreciate her concern for your daughter, your daughter belongs at home with her family. Does she expect you to just have your daughter live with her forever so that she can continue going to the same school? Does she think that would be the best solution? For your daughter to not live with her mom and dad?

Bottom line..........this is YOUR child. You call the shots!!!

Moving school at her age is probably the best time to do it of any age, she can still keep in touch with special friends she already has. Maybe you mom could help you out with this by having those friends round for tea once in a while. She can hav epen pals, with your help, to keep in touch too.

When she moves into her new home she will want to go to the same school as her neighbours, not some school 45 mins away.

You are going to have to be strong, be firm, try to stay in control and tell your mom, you love her, you love your daughter and you want her at home with you. She will be fine about moving, it will take a little time for her to settle, but she will settle with your love and your moms support. Your mom has obviously got too attached to your daughter and is worried she will not see her much. Make your new home welcoming to your mom, invite her round, tell her she can visit often.

Good luck

Thanks for the input, I know I am right, but I have such a hard time with my mom. I don't understand why she gets like this. My mother will probably be mad for a while but she will have to get over it. Anyways, I talked to my mom again, now she wants to know if i had changed my mind. She keeps saying when she was my age she made alot of bad decisions for my brother,sister, and me and she just don't want me to make the same wrong moves with my daughter.(I have absolutly no idea what she is talking about)I am 26 years old, my husband and I are both employed, it's not like we are teenagers that can't support our kids. My daughter has already made friends with the little girl across the street. They will be in the same class together. I asked my daughter how she felt about going to school here and she said she will like it because she already has friends. I just can't convince my mom to cool down about any of this though.

I agree with Fifistoosh. If you have to transfer your kids to a new school it's better to do it while they're younger, BEFORE they've had a chance to forge friendships that are years long and really tight.

We moved from RI to FL last April, and had to move my 2 kids (ages 9 & 6). Then we moved across the city about 2 months ago when we bought a home. They're adjusting fine to their new surroundings, and have had no ill effects. I'm sorry to say, but I think your mom is trying to use the guilt thing on you to see if you'll change your mind. Stand up for yourself, your family and YOUR daughter.

Even though it's not really nice to say, I used to say this to my mom....."You spent your life messing us all up, now it's time for me to do that to my own kids." It pretty much meant that she raised HER kids her way, so let you raise yours YOUR way.
Good Luck!
Sue