Hi, I have just joined this site. I am 24 years old with a 3 1/2 year old boy. I just moved to this new state and it was brought to my attention that my son displays signs of autism. I took him to our pediatrician a couple days ago and she agrees. I am now waiting for an appointment with a child psyciatrist and a neurologist. He has not yet been diagnosed. I do not know very much on the subject, so this all scares me a little. I have always thought that my son was real stubborn and bad, but now that I have read up on it a little, I can see whats really going on. I'm having a hard time with his tantrums. There is no reasoning with him, and he never tires out. He doesn't speak well at all, yet he is so very smart. He has taught himself how to write letters, he loves letters and numbers. He is also great with the computer. I don't know what to do about his behavior. Another serious problem is his eating habits. He will only eat crunchy things. And up until yesterday, only drank water. (his new drink is coke) Any time I have tried to give him anything other than crunchy things, he gags and throws it up. He doesnt even like to look at it, let alone touch it. He needs to eat real food and I don't know what to do... If anyone has any ideas, I would love some input. Any help would be appreciated. :angel:
My family, his grandparents, are not taking this so well either. My mother is not understanding whats going on, and thinks he is going to end up like rainman. His father is not taking it well either. He will not talk about it and I don't know what to do. I don't want him to be disappointed with his son, and I feel that he may be thinking that. All I know is that Anthony, my son, has great potential, and I hope that he can work through his current issues. If anyone has any info on what the process of the diagnosis is and what types of therapy he will be getting afterwards I would really appreciate your help. Thank you for your time, and I apologize about the length of the post.
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bercol1
12-30-2005, 08:07 PM
Hi
My son is also called Anthony,it's such a beautiful name isn't it. My son is now six and has come on lots in the past years, as too have all the family. But don't worry as we all had the same probelms you are having. take care, chin up, it does get better.
Bernadette
heartcreature
12-30-2005, 09:44 PM
Try to be postive and just give your family time. It's probably something that they don't really know much about and movies that portray autism are so often the only exposure some people get to autism. The movies don't always portray it like it really is. Also remember that each person is unique and you can't look at one autistic person and say that they all will be like that one person. My son is 19 and he does very well. At age 3 4 5 or 6 I would not have imagined my son would come this far. He can drive a car. He is attending college and he works part time. He has difficulty in social skills and his communication skills are still lacking, but he's making it.
I would guess he would receive speech and occupational therapy and how often depends on the different service providers. The diagnosis may be determined over several visits and with the recommendations of specialists in their particular fields. 3 1/2 is young and some specialists may not be ready to give a definitive diagnosis of autism. My son tested below average intelligence when given a test requiring verbal skills, but average or above average on tests that didn't require verbal skills. These tests were done at age 8 and his communication skills were determined to be at age 2 or 3. Social skills were in that same age level as well. In other areas such as his physical abilities he was at or above age level. He learned to ride a bike at age 3 and he just got on it started pedaling and took off. My other children were age 6 or older and had to be started on training wheels and pushed around and helped to balance before they learned to ride. Uneven development in all areas that they test will help them to determine whether they give a diagnosis of autism.
boysboysboys
12-31-2005, 12:02 AM
Hi Elvea,
What state are you in? The procedures and services seem to vary greatly by state. In Wisconsin, kids with Autism can get an intensive in-home therapy for 35 hours per week. Unfortunately you have to wait approximately 6 months from the diagnosis to get to start therapy. Also, our school system provides Speech and Occupational Therapy.
My twin 3 yr. old sons both have Autism and are both picky eaters like your son. My sons prefer only soft foods, though. Our neurologist recommended giving them the nutritional supplement Ensure. Normally Ensure is for senior citizens, but Pediasure (which is for kids) tastes bad and is more expensive. I don't know if you will be able to get your son to drink it since he prefers water, but it's worth a shot. The vanilla flavored one tastes like a melted vanilla shake to me.
We saw our neurologist 2 months ago. We had the choice of whether or not to run some tests to rule out other conditions or problems. My boys had MRIs and tons of blood work. They had to put them out using general anesthesia for the MRI and then took the blood while they were still under anesthesia. One twin had his done last month and everything came out fine except he is low on iron. The other twin just had his done yesterday, so we haven't heard anything yet.
It sounds as if you are doing everything you can. You sound like a great mom and seem to be wise beyond your years. Your husband and family will come around. Everyone handles things on a different time line.
This board is a great resource, come back often. Best wishes to you, dear. take care.
geezermom
12-31-2005, 12:33 AM
Hearing the word "autism" in the same sentence as your child's name can be an earth-shattering emotional moment. I'm sorry to hear that Anthony shows some signs of autism, but glad that he has such a proactive mom who's already out here investigating.
Dittos on the services mentioned above. Speech and Occupational Therapy seem to be prescribed to most kids on the autistic spectrum. There are all sorts of other approaches out there, but you may have to muddle through for a while until 1) you see what seems to be working and 2) Anthony gets a bit older. Many families note that, regardless of what flavor of intervention their child has gotten, they do get better in certain areas as they leave the preschool years behind. Yea!!
About your family's reaction...shock, disbelief, anger, sorrow, etc are really common reactions. You are probably feeling a smorgasbord of all of this stuff right this very moment. However, as the person who is the "team captain" of his intervention, you HAVE to stay frosty - to stay focused. The rest of the family isn't calling the shots, so they have time on their hands to wallow a bit. In a weird way, your responsibility as his mom and your new stance as "warrior mommy" are gonna keep you from some of that emotional stuff. After he's in bed at night, of course, you'll probably do your weeping. But in the meantime, you're trying to help him the best way you know how. And so, YOU will become the family expert on autism and have to teach the others.
Please, immediately tell them its a spectrum disorder. It can be horribly devastating and debilitating, or so mild that somebody is just considered shy. I was a petroleum geologist for 20 years before becoming a mom and worked with hundreds and hundreds of engineers in that time. Knowing what I do today about autism, there's a whole batch of my former engineer buddies I KNOW are on the autistic spectrum! It explains the lack of good eye contact, the ridiculously neat desks, the occasional arrogance, the shy demeanor, the undivided interest in drill bits (bleh), etc. Your Anthony may end up working for NASA one day, be married to an outgoing gal who yaks enough for the two of them, and be the quiet type of dad who'll snuggle up with a story book and build dollhouses and model airplanes. Did you know that Bill Gates is supposed to have Aspbergers?
If you can get onto some autism websites that show checklists, describe symptoms, etc, maybe print some stuff out to give to various family members. And don't lose hope! Your kid is little, and is therefore going to be obnoxious, regardless of whether he's got some flavor of autism or not. I've got two preschoolers myself, and I regularly fantasize about plopping them in a giant box marked FREE TO GOOD HOME and dumping their raggedy little butts at the grocery store.
Go kiss your husband and hold him tight. You're both in for a ride, but it'll be okay. It really will.
Cheers,
Geezermom
Curious Nana
12-31-2005, 03:28 PM
Ditto to Geezermom! How beautifully stated! We were there a year ago with my grandson, and as I stated in my recent post, we could not have predicted what success we would see in a year. In Indiana, as soon as Drake turned 3, he was eligible for evaluation through our school system. He was immediately involved in a preschool program with a teacher who has the biggest heart! Along with changing to a specialized diet (he would only eat things that he was not to eat), having blood, urine, and hair tested and giving him prescribed vitamins, minerals, and amino acids based on that testing, and Baby Bumblebee and Einstein videos to help increase vocab in a fun way, he has thrived. Your path to success may look different and involve different steps, but you will get there because of your warrior instinct. How lucky your son is to have you!!!