I thought when I was younger and bringing up the children and dealing with the stress of making a husband happy and keeping all things working smoothly were the toughest years. I was wrong. I am finding that these are really very confusing years. I do not even know how old is old and how young is young. I go to the beauty shop every five weeks so that they can work their wonders on me so that I am attractive (in a way) to my husband and the young women like to crowd around me and talk as they say I am young for my age and am fun to talk to. This even confuses me worse. They constantly ask me about growing older and my life with my husband as they are searching and want to know what their life will be at this age. I do not know what to tell them. What do you say? They do not know and want to know. I just tell them that it is no different with us than it is with their husbands. This is all part of the aging issues but when I leave the beauty parlor I do not feel good as I feel older as they have made me feel like I am some kind of an old person who is not supposed to enjoy life because she is older.


This is my hardest time. I am too old to be young and too young to be old. I am just having a terrible time of it. Society says that I am supposed to act old yet I feel so young and alive and am so far from aging that it is not funny. When I was younger I thought when I got to this age I would probably be near dead. I can remember my Grandmother died a year earlier than I am and even though I am a Grandmother I am more important a woman who loves life and her husband. I never thought in the deepest corner of my mind that I would have the feelings in life that I have now.
It is the most puzzling time of my life. I never knew this would have existed.

I wonder if there are other women or men out there my age who are having this terrible time at this point in life. I think often of the movie Fried Green Tomatoes. Not that I am one of those women in the movie that sits in a circle with a mirror to learn her vagina as I do not have that problem but just the women in general in the movie facing growing older. Now I am closer to 69 than 68 and in great moments feel 28 and others around 58. I am sure my husband does not know sometimes who will be walking into the room. When I mess up with directions sometimes it makes me furious. Only with myself. I do not want to slow down and fight every bit of it.

How do you other women or even men in this age group handle this? Do we all have these hang ups or am I just super sensitive at this age? Please believe me I am not afraid of dying or anything. Just as long as I die in his arms.

I think at the age of 58,that I am old and most days I feel 30. I am male married 28 yrs., When wife comes in the room I feel like I am 30,when she leaves I become like 88.I look at women and they seem like my daughter ,they seem so young. My doctor when I was young said I would not live to the age of 18, Now i am 58!!!!!!!!! My aunt just made 97 in December 05, So what is old??

I agree, my worse problems comes with the younger, say around 46 like our daughter when they get thinking you are getting old. Sometime is gets depressing when people think because you are in your late 60's that you are old and I do not feel old. Guess will worry about it in my late 70's if I make it. Never thought I would get this old either. Guess it is all the Medicare stuff and bad knees from golfing that get to you. Or my favorite is at a bank cashing a check or somewhere that I have to show my ID and you hear "Oh, I did not know you were that old". Lord how I love that. Really makes my day. Sets me in depression until I realize I probably would have said the same thing a few years ago to someone. Oh well, so goes life.
Take care.

I work in a medical office with mostly 20-something women. The other day there was some confusion about which client had asked for a refill. I said "is it that man who just left", (he was in his 20's). The girls said "oh, no,....this guy was old....he was like 35". They were very embarrassed when they remembered that I'm in my mid 40's!

Hi Conniesue, Your question "What is old" caught our attention, First of all, we are your seniors by 6 years, married 54 years, but to us 75 is only two numbers; every day we decide how old we want to be.
For example, yesterday my wife and I spent about an hour and a half clearing 6" of snow from our sidewalk, deck, and driveway, came in, took a good shower and enjoyed a bowl of potato soup. The rest of the day we read, worked on a jig-saw puzzle, and surfed the "web".
We compare ourselves with some of our neighbors, one on oxygen 24/7, others using a cane, walker, and one using a wheel chair, it's then that we realize that we are indeed Blessed in Soul, Mind, and Body.
Our intimacy is certainly not in a "honeymoon mode" any more, but we are able to satisfy our pleasures and desires.
So our answer to "what is old" is, everyday feel as old as you want to feel.
Every morning tell each other " I love you more than yesterday, but not as much as tomorrow".
Our Best to all of you, and a Happy, Happy New Year!!!

MrBojangle: you have just made my day. You two sound so much like my husband and myself. We just do everything together and I adore him. We have had our share of his double knee replacements, rotar cuff tear, gall bladder out, three hernia operations, appendix (all him) but with the doctor's help they keep gluing him back together. It is so funny how at this age you can look at your loved one and he looks just the same as the sailor I married 47 years ago. Love is deeper and more passionate even though our days are getting shorter.

I guess I just treasure life so much and deep down just may not be admitting that the fear of ever living without him would be too much to bare. All these things are just part of growing old but until recently I have never thought of it before. It has probably hit me since I discovered this Board less than two weeks ago. The words of all the people on this Board is so great and I loved the story of you and your wife. I will remember it well. Thank you. Happy New Year to you and yours.

I work in a medical office with mostly 20-something women. The other day there was some confusion about which client had asked for a refill. I said "is it that man who just left", (he was in his 20's). The girls said "oh, no,....this guy was old....he was like 35". They were very embarrassed when they remembered that I'm in my mid 40's!
That hurts kaycee. LOL Im 42, We are the MTV generation (Madonna, Duran Duran, Ratt etc..) Most people think im alot younger than my age.I guess its genes and attitude!! (Thank god for VH1 classics) later!!

I think alot of it has to do with how healthy you feel, because that is everything. Filter out the rest. If you feel healthy, you are young. I am in my 30s and recently battled cancer. My mom just died of cancer, in her 50s. I have been so exhausted that I FEEL old and look tired. If you have your health and are in a good relationship(s), that is everything and reflects all your beauty and vitality.

I think alot of it has to do with how healthy you feel, because that is everything. Filter out the rest. If you feel healthy, you are young. I am in my 30s and recently battled cancer. My mom just died of cancer, in her 50s. I have been so exhausted that I FEEL old and look tired. If you have your health and are in a good relationship(s), that is everything and reflects all your beauty and vitality.

I am so happy that you are doing well. Our oldest son has battled cancer since he was 22. He is now 45. Lost a lot of tissue from different parts of moles being taken out from melonoma's but we are still so happy so far they find them. I guess each and every phase of life is a rough time.

I am so happy that you are doing well. Just have a wonderful Happy New Year and I am so sorry about your Mother. Stay well.

I am 44 and feel so very old. To me, life has passed me by on a fast train. I have been running after it, but can't seem to catch it. Now, I am getting more tired and not running after the train as fast.

I think many times when I was your age I felt that way too. You just seem so darn tired out. Sometimes I would sit back and wonder what I had accomplished.

Now I sit back and wonder what I have done to be so happy and content at this age. One day you feel down but today is just a great day. Just happy to be alive. I guess thinking about it we start aging since the day we were born. That would make me 25,035 days old give or take a few. Despite looking at those numbers I am just so happy to be alive. I guess I should be as that is OLD. Just keep on kickin. Take care.

I feel like I should be in my twenties still -- since I haven't accomplished anything in life.

I'd resolved not to let myself "feel" old, no matter what my chronological age -- but society makes that very difficult. I get offered senior citizen discounts, people ask if I have grandchildren, etc. Today a neighbor said he'd seen me with my "son." I am 54, and the man he was referring to is my 54-y.o. significant other!

Now I will agree that is a kick in the teeth. But I would say that your neighbor needs glasses. I, too, lately refuse to grow old. My husband is a carbon copy of me and we just have a ball. We have decided this morning at 4 A.M. that we definitely are not going to grow old. We had just made the decision we were still young and to go to Disneyland in Florida. I just made reservations at the Contemporary on the 12th floor overlooking the park so that we could see the fireworks and be on the monorail to go back in time and really groove for 4 days. They have carts you can rent for the day at $35 a day for each of us and we are really going to have some fun.

So many crazy things happen at these ages. Recently I had to stop at the drugstore to get some lubricant. It had been a while since I had picked some up and always got KY. I was looking at all the stuff they had and it blew my mind. Some kindly man of about my age who was additional help came up and asked me if he could help me find what I wanted. I thought you sick old man like you are going to help me find this. I politely told him no laughing to myself. I then went to the pharmacist to ask for help as truthfully so many things there. She took me to an area near the check out counter for prescriptions and there they had some great lubricants. I was blown away. There sitting on three chairs were three elderly women, probably about my age and younger, but I am one of the cool young elderly women watching me. One looked so prim that she would crack in half if she smiled. The neat female pharmacist pointed out the lubricants to me smiling all the time. Little did she know I was a sex fiend. When she came to the strawberry superglide my eyes lighted up like a slot machine. All I could think was flavored sex. Unfortunately my mouth said it loud enough too as I could not believe it. The pharmacist laughed and I being who I am was not embarrassed but I looked and one lady was laughing, one lady did not acknowledge that she had heard me and the prim one was white and had crawled down into her chair.

So with this in mind, guess I am not that old. Welcome to my world

I think many times when I was your age I felt that way too. You just seem so darn tired out. Sometimes I would sit back and wonder what I had accomplished.

Now I sit back and wonder what I have done to be so happy and content at this age. One day you feel down but today is just a great day. Just happy to be alive. I guess thinking about it we start aging since the day we were born. That would make me 25,035 days old give or take a few. Despite looking at those numbers I am just so happy to be alive. I guess I should be as that is OLD. Just keep on kickin. Take care.

Thank you conniesue! I appreciate your comments and encouragement. I need to "just keep on kickin".

Thank you conniesue! I appreciate your comments and encouragement. I need to "just keep on kickin".

At this age even some of the kickin is hard. I was not born to exercise. Lord made special people for this. NOT ME. I am special for other things. Making good food, love to talk to people on computer as just found the site, lovin my husband to death, planning ways to spend money, trying to figure out how to explain this to him so that it sounds like it was a great idea, celebrating later when I WON. I figure I have had some rotten years bringing up darling children who I swear hate you from age 11 to 19 and with one to 46. Trying to keep a marriage together and now is the time to rejoice and live and love. Unfortunately, just about too old for both but as you said just keep on kickin.........Thanks my friend. You people make life so darn much fun.

Well I am 41 and I feel old. I think society makes women feel old by the time we reach reach 30. Men on the other hand are still considered attractive at 45, women are considered old.

I am 41 and pregnant. let me tell you, I walk into the gyn's office feeling happy being pregnant and then I see a room full of pregnant women in their 20's who look at me in horror! lol

Since I have hit 40 I find myself comparing myself with other people who are 40, I always think do I look that old!!!!

I have thought about having a little pastic surgery and and there but then you don't look any better than an old car that's been repainted.

Not much we can do.

Well I am 41 and I feel old. I think society makes women feel old by the time we reach reach 30. Men on the other hand are still considered attractive at 45, women are considered old.

I am 41 and pregnant. let me tell you, I walk into the gyn's office feeling happy being pregnant and then I see a room full of pregnant women in their 20's who look at me in horror! lol

Since I have hit 40 I find myself comparing myself with other people who are 40, I always think do I look that old!!!!

I have thought about having a little pastic surgery and and there but then you don't look any better than an old car that's been repainted.

Not much we can do.

Congratulations on the new baby. That is so wonderful. You are not old. They are young. Sometime I think back and wish I had my children later in life. We were so young as I had them at 21, 23 and 28. I was still such a child in many ways. We just did not have enough years at that time for me to truly grow up and be prepared for the Mother I could have been with a few years of growing up with my husband. She was born 9 months and 15 days after we were married. Need I say more of the morals of our age. But we did have fun.........


The first thing you should do when looking at those other women in their 40's is say I look a lot better than they do. Make yourself feel good in everything you do. That is so important. You are important. There is only one person like you and that is your special quality. Oh I am sure plastic surgery some people like but I have found as I age that I feel so great about life and am still so in love with my husband that this makes me feel young. I am now closer to being 69 than 68 but as long as I do not feel this in my soul and heart with him and I look at him and melt what truly does age matter. I find these are the true secrets of staying young. My husband is still my lover and best friend. I truly believe if a woman can accomplish this in life and get to the age I am and have the feelings I have for him and never let it get away at any time with all the stresses in life and children growing up and all the things that try to pull them apart yet cling to each other that those secrets are what make us what we are today.

Sometimes I sit back and pinch myself wondering where the years have gone. He will be 70 in March yet I can look at him and do not see a 70 year old man I see my sailor of years ago that I fell madly in love with and still am to this day. I think if a woman or man can look at their partner in life and always retain the ability to do this is the secret to a wonderful life and holding "Father Time" off. Sure I know I am aging but my heart is still so young............Honey you are still a baby. Have a wonderful life.


I really think that aging is much harder on us women than men. Like you said you go into the OB Waiting Room and see these "youngster's expecting". But who is going to make the better parent? You know that it is you. I so wish that I would have been your age when I had a child. Had time to appreciate it more. I tell my husband that and he cringes as he liked having them young. But truly you are the lucky one. Looking at the beauty books and ads you are right that once a woman gets to her 30's she is heading for the pastures. Makes a woman dread growing older. I still say getting here you will like it. For me at that age I was too busy to think about it but this is a different culture then I was in. Yet as women we are one and the same. Thanks much.

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I want all the years - young, middle-aged, and old. I spent many years being young and have used them all up. I liked being young but now I am 53 and am using up my middle-aged years. I feel middle-aged and I like it. When those years are gone, I want to experience being old. I don't want to die without having experienced it. I want the whole thing.
Thank you again my friend who wrote me the wonderful note during my anger. You truly made my day.

I used up all those younger years too but I do not know where they went. I blinked an eye and they were gone. Where has my life gone? It seems like yesterday I married my husband. I want to experience being old too but how do you tell your mind this and the age catches up with you and you feel 28 at some great moments and at the best 58. I swear it is truly one of the craziest things in my life. I do not know where the years have gone. Sometimes I wonder would I wish I had my life to live over and the answer is NO. I am so happy here that I could not bear to go back and go through all that again. I do cherish every minute of life but being where I have been and am is to me the most wonderful surprise of my life. This truly blows my mind. I was not expecting it.

One story I wish I started this Topic with I am going to add. It has to do with aging and forgetting.

My husband and I love to travel. In 2000 we went to Norfolk, Virginia and stayed on the river near some big area that is built up for boat rides and just wonderful at a Marriott. Enjoyed it so much. We have always been so close. We never stopped holding hands and just plain are close. I have never stopped being in love with him and flirting with him since we married. Just us. We have had many people ask us over the course of our years how we stay this way. It is embarrassing but that is the way we are. This I have to put into this story. We had walked down to the riverside to wait for a two deck cruise ship to again go out and see the fleet as I married a Navy man and this was to be my fourth trip to the same place to ohhhh and ahhhhhh at those wonderful ships as I heard the same information over as we passed his wonderful aircraft carriers. Oh I could do it so well. Now I am happy we went as with 9/11 you can no longer go where we went.

We boarded the little two story cruise ship with bathroom and snack bar and went upstairs and sat. It was after the kids had gone to school so no big crowds. Up on the Upper Deck was another couple. I would say our age who were sitting in back. We were to be the only two couples upstairs. I noticed them as we went by. He was very dignified looking and she was very smartly dressed in slacks and sweater and as we passed by I wondered if perhaps he was a doctor or dentist as he looked this type. I looked down as we moved forward to the front to give us maybe 6 rows between them for their and our privacy. I looked down at her and we smiled at each other and moved on. They were not talking and seem so bored. Not a word spoken just sitting there. My husband and I never stop touching. It was not unusual when with us sitting in the front row up there that he would lean over and kiss me. I mean let's face it. It was not a sucky mouth type kiss. Just a nice little sweet kiss like I love you. During the close to two hour trip we held hands and he had his arm around me and I him. We are in our own world. We never stopped holding each other. It is just us. I recall I looked around once and saw them but never thought of it. When the cruise was done we got up to go to the back of the boat where the steps going down were. They were still sitting there. I kind of thought that unusual and looked down in their direction and saw the man with the most pleasant smile on his face and so happy. I looked and she was holding his hand clinging to him. I guess I was shocked truly. I looked at her and she looked at me and said to me without words as I could read her lips as we were so close "THANK YOU". I immediately knew what she was saying and meant for she was thanking me for reminding her of lost youth and love and to make every minute count. I silently did the same to her and mouthed back '"YOU ARE WELCOME". The picture of that couple will remain in my mind as plain as yesterday the rest of my life. I could pick them out today if they were with 1000 people. It is a memory I will never forget...............................

TO MY DEAR, DEAR FRIEND'S IN NORFOLK..........THIS THREAD IS FOR YOU......

Well I am 41 and I feel old. I think society makes women feel old by the time we reach reach 30.
I seen on Parade magazine a few weeks back about baby boomers turning 60 and all these beautiful 60 yr young women. Suzanne Sommers, Cher , Dolly Parton, Sally fields, Connie Chung just a few . Oh im 42, bring on beautiful older women !!!

I seen on Parade magazine a few weeks back about baby boomers turning 60 and all these beautiful 60 yr young women. Suzanne Sommers, Cher , Dolly Parton, Sally fields, Connie Chung just a few . Oh im 42, bring on beautiful older women !!!

Well without a doubt I am a combination of all those women:

Let's see: Suzanne Sommers not too much with her but I will definately say that I do like to watch people exercise. I think one of my knees is like hers.

Sally Fields: Well I do have a great personality but am not as tiny as she is but think I would definately make a great actress.

Connie Chung and I are so very much alike. We both like talking about the news and I do love the name Maury.

Cher: She is without a doubt my wild side. That woman groves. She and I could have one wild evening out. I like Cher. Unfortunately my husband would love her more.

That Leaves Dolly Parton: Now if you think I am going to touch this one with a ten foot pole you are all crazy. You will just have to guess what I am thinking.

I am without a doubt a combination of all of them but poor boy, I am taken. Madly in love and taken.

Hope you find your dream girl................

Well without a doubt I am a combination of all those women:

Let's see: Suzanne Sommers not too much with her but I will definately say that I do like to watch people exercise. I think one of my knees is like hers.

Sally Fields: Well I do have a great personality but am not as tiny as she is but think I would definately make a great actress.

Connie Chung and I are so very much alike. We both like talking about the news and I do love the name Maury.

Cher: She is without a doubt my wild side. That woman groves. She and I could have one wild evening out. I like Cher. Unfortunately my husband would love her more.

That Leaves Dolly Parton: Now if you think I am going to touch this one with a ten foot pole you are all crazy. You will just have to guess what I am thinking.

I am without a doubt a combination of all of them but poor boy, I am taken. Madly in love and taken.

Hope you find your dream girl................
Way to go connie sue !!! I also enjoyed your story on your trip to Norfolk.I too was in the Navy (from 81-85) and spent my first yr there in Norfolk Naval Shipyards.

Way to go connie sue !!! I also enjoyed your story on your trip to Norfolk.I too was in the Navy (from 81-85) and spent my first yr there in Norfolk Naval Shipyards.

Two Navy Guys. That is neat. He was on the Yorktown which is now in Charleston. He finally has seen it enought. He said the last time it has really not been kept up but it is a museum now. I have gone through this once while he was on duty in 1957 when I went out to see him in San Francisco while we were going together and twice in Charleston. We became engaged four months later after he came home on leave. I truly believe that the song "I left my heart in San Francisco" was written for me. It was so hard to get on that train and go back home.

I love the Norfolk area. It was so interesting. Once we saw a submarine coming back from duty, went across the long bridge tunnel and saw four aircraft carriers at dock at one time. A week later a woman drove off the bridge. I was scared there.Saw the Wisconsin moth balled and them taking another carrier apart. Been there four time. He loved it. I love him so I loved it. Lord, I should have used this on him and made him go to a doll show. (He would not).

One of my favorite memories of Norfolk trip is while we were staying at the Marriott I got it in my head that I wanted to see the Challenger go up. It was slated to go in two days at like 7 in the morning. So my husband after my pleading packed up early and we headed to get to Daytona Beach by the next evening. Now that is one wild place. Got there in time to see the Challenger as I thought go up. Got up like 1 in the morning to head to Titusville or Cape Canaveral. Arrived and see all these cars. Dark out and cars everywhere. I decided I needed some pop so stopped at gas station as we knew we were in the right area. Marines all over. Asked gas station attendant which way to see the Challenger and he wanted to know how our ticket read. My husband looked at me like well here we go again. Needless to say I knew nothing about a ticket. Everyone was getting in line across from the gas station at some gates going into the missile range. I asked him about getting in and a ticket and he laughed. He should never have done that for a woman does not like to be laughed at. Particularly me. That raises the cunning and evil side of me to try to buck the system and get it. So I entered my special world of plotting. Made him get in line with the cars which he did cussing me out again at what in the name of God was I going to do next. I KNEW. Got down to the gate where these cute Marine were checking the cars and the cards against the numbers and my venture began. He smiled and asked for our card. I said I knew nothing about a card. Told him I had called down here a couple of days ago and they said that there would be no problem and told me the directions. Cute Marine said no you have to have a card but seeing you have driven all night from Kentucky or whatever I said I will give you a card. And he did. My husband would not speak to me for a while, maybe 40 seconds, and then let me know he could not believe I could do something like that. I told him I could not believe I could either but be quiet and drive and find out where the Challenger was. We drove so far into the place which is so heavily guarded with crocodiles all over. All the way Marine watching us. They kept us going, never stopping. We passed lots and lots filled with RV's, cars, refreshment stands, port a potties, then more woods and more lots. I thought we had traveled 20 miles and were not going to see it. Finally just as dawn was about to break they guided us into a lot and parked. They told us that after the Challenger went up we could not leave for I believe 2 hours as in case it had problems this was the rule. We had turned left off the road we were on and I could see across this large lake the Challenger. It was lit up by spotlights and was the most beautiful sight. I was just in awe. We parked and got out. Lot was filled and saw provisions for us to enjoy food or whatever we needed. Above circling was a helicopter actually quite a few of them with a man in the area where the door was with a machine gun watching the crowd. Below in the lake we could see shark fins. Nope I was not going to go wading. It was truly an experience. We were being piped everything that was going on. Finally the count went down and we all counted as it went. When it got down to 0 and the flames that we could se so plainly started to burn the noise across the lake was deafening. It oh so slowly rose in the air. I screamed at my husband as I thought it would come back down as it did not look like it could lift that massive weight off the ground. It was something I will never forget. It finally cleared the tower and I felt better. Even snapped some pictures. So wished I had the camcorder with me. It got up higher and we could see the roll so slow and beautiful. Just an awesome sight. The trailing of the white smoke or whatever it is. When it got off the ground the ground shook so bad where we were standing I could not believe it. Unless someone sees this they would never believe it. The next day we went over to the Cape and we were allowed to take a trip out to where it had just left. They let us get near enough that we could still see the water that had stopped the burning and the dark burn marks on the soil. This was to be the one that blew up. I do not know how many times after this time we saw it that it went up again. I am so happy that it did not happen when we saw it..

God Bless Those Poor People. It really is quite a memory.

Now as I am sitting here thinking about aging so much more than I have ever in my life, I think of my wonderful sister women. The women who have lost their precious husband's. The ones who are not knowing the wonders of growing old with the love of their life. The statistics are that by age 65 one half of all the men of these married women will be dead. This is a terrible figure. Of the remaining one half of these men alive only 14% of them will have their wives that have passed on. Look at that small percentage that this leaves for the women that have already lost their husband.

What is the answer? Make every precious moment count. Love him like there is no tomorrow. Have a song in your heart every minute of the day. I know that I can hear Tammy Wynette sing the song "Stand By Your Man" or Michael Bolton singing "When a Man Loves a Woman" or Eric Clampton singing to me "You Look Wonderful Tonight" and this can bring me back to lost youth. All these things are so important to us as women both young and old. Retaining these thoughts as we grow old help keep us from aging too fast.

At least I think so...................................... .........

I wanted to weigh in with my thoughts on feeling "old" and aging. Plus, this is my first post after some time spent just reading, yay!

I think it really is true when they say it's the car and not the mileage or however that goes :). If you are enjoying the activities you do, loving the people you know and looking forward to the next day when you go to sleep at least half the time, then it shouldn't matter how old you are. Full disclosure: I will be 32 this year. I became very depressed around the time I was 29 and I blamed a lot of that on the fact that was almost 30, I felt like a failure, I was taking a long time to get through school. I managed to pull myself out of that feeling through trips to a good psychiatrist. Plus my faith and love of music, which I was fortunate enough to make a career out of, helped to pull me through not to mention family and friends. When I started to learn the important things to me, I was able to stop worrying so much about things I can't change like getting to 30. I know I made progress since I don't feel any anxiety at all thinking of my next birthday. So I agree with conniesue and the others in this thread who have talked about cherishing the moments as well as admiring women who have accomplished a lot in their years.

I wanted to weigh in with my thoughts on feeling "old" and aging. Plus, this is my first post after some time spent just reading, yay!
You are so right in setting your goals and going for it. No matter how long it takes it is worth it. Not settling for less. I admire you. Music is such a wonderful relaxing entertainment. I can never get tired of it.

It is funny as my husband and I were out for lunch today and talking about what a wonderful life we have had. Just so much fun. These last four or five years have just been so magic. And yes it is the car and not the mileage that counts. We just never let it stall. We got talking about the lottery. I have never played it nor would but even if I had entered one or won one I would NEVER want one thing in our life to change. I would not take it. This I swear. It might just change us and I could never let that even possibly change. If the younger people could only realize that as you age you do not have to change and get old. It is up to you to let these feelings happen. If you feel old, you will act old. We just do not feel old.

Sometimes I will just sit back and think, my lord I am going to be 69 soon....Only then will I reflect on my age and think wow! that is really getting up there. Then I will remember what I forgot.............................age is a number only........only a small number.....Thanks.

I guess this is a true story of reality: Also am convinced old people just like to read and not write:

Twenty two years ago we went to Las Vegas for our first time. It was a new adventure. During our stay there I discovered many things. Many I have retained and some sad as this one. We stayed at the Hilton over near the Convention Center which sucked as it was not on the Strip. This was to be the only time we ever stayed off the Strip. Only thing nice about it was our room overlooked some stupid golf course where professional's played some tournaments. One of the days there we drove up to Hoover Dam. Had heard about it and did want to see why we were there. I was thrilled with it and so impressed. It was beautiful with the glistening blue water and motor boats going around and you could see as you drove up where people were boating down on Lake Mead. I loved it. We parked close and were able to walk down to the Dam and take a tour. I loved that like I loved a giant hole in the head but I endured. At the Upper most part of the dam there was a parking lot for personnel and next to it a great little tourist eating place and benches outside to look at the Upper Lake Mead as people were fishing and I could look down at the fish that I could see all the way to the bottom. There I sat for a good two hours as my precious other half had called the top dogs at Hoover Dam and inasmuch as he was in the capacity of what goes on there he was to be given a special private tour into the bowels of the Hoover Dam. I am sure to some other person who enjoys looking at the bowels and pipes of the Hoover Dam this would be interesting. I not only choose to wait at the eating area but was not invited. You can believe I sure did not scream and kick about that. He went off and was gone for a good while but I had my pop and popcorn and whatever I wanted to eat and besides that I had my bathroom. What more could a woman want. Seeing I smoked then I even lit up a few. Oh, those were the days. Privacy, serenity, time to think and enjoy the wonder of this beautiful place. We then left to go back to the gambling capitol of the world.

Two years ago this July or August we had purchased a new SUV or whatever they are called and it was my smart idea (like at Cape Canaveral) to test it in the mountains and drive out to Las Vegas. Seeing he is retired and has been since age 64 he agreed to my innocent trip. We drove out with reservations waiting at the Venetian. They put us on two floors from the top in a suite and it was wonderful. But only when we got there. On driving out there it was so hot that we could not believe it. When in the mountains it was 103 and just so warm. On arriving at Mesquite it reached it's highest at 117. Even our new air conditioner on the car gave us problems. We arrived at the gas station and I got out of car and just about fell on my face. The heat was unbearable. When we finally arrived in town the only thing you wanted to do was stay inside. One day it rained and the rain never got us wet. It would dry on us as it came down. I have never seen this happen before. We decided to go up to Hoover Dam for the first time in many years as we had driven by it one time as we took the Southern route home rather than go through Grand Junction. We arrived there and I was shocked. First the additional security from 9/11 was in place and traffic was very slow just getting there. I was so confused when we were in the hills coming down as I could not see the blue bubbling lake in the distance but figured it was a different direct. Finally with a lot of turning we arrived there. I could not find our little tourist restaurant as that was not there. Instead was a big parking stall building. We continue on around the Dam and near the middle there was a pull off where we pulled off at my insistence to find a place. My husband believes in only following the car in front and never to waver. I do not believe God made me to walk 4 miles back to see something so he did what he was told. That was smart of him. He knew it was hot to start with and do not ever mess with Mother Nature (me). We parked and got out of the car. Pretty soon about 12 other people parked too. We had made a parking lot. Should not have been but as far as I was concerned it was great. We got out of the car and I received the biggest shock of my life. Where was my Lake Mead? Where were the fish and the boaters and the fishermen? Why were the water intakes showing? What was happening? It was as if I was on the moon. Barren, low water. Terrible. I was to find my looking at the rim that in the last 8 years it was down a good 80 ft. I believe. It is not my Hoover Dam anymore. It is a mess. Where had all the water gone. Now I read on the net that this January it should go up 10 ft. but by the end of the year it will have lost another 12 and one half feet. I never would have believed this had I not saw it. We talked to people about what had happened as we drew a crowd and explained what had happened and where it should be. The average person thinks it is just great. It is a sad situation. All this for what. Everybody takes the water. We must keep the fountains going in Las Vegas plus everyone taking their share. Sadly in Grand Junction, Colorado we saw people watering useless straw just to use their amount they were allowed.. Yet we went to a McDonald's in town and the manager charged us for a glass of water. Go figure... This is the most unbelievable thing I have ever seen that has happened in my lifetime. It was like I was visiting another time and another place.

If this is progress, we are in big trouble................................. ...........

I used to think people were old when they started to do or say...
* I look younger than my age
* I'm something years young
* What was medically wrong with them when not even asked
* Who beam when told they "dont look that old"
* Who grin when asked if your daughter is your sister and keep telling everybody else

I think age is when you stop feeling surprised, annoyed or patronized when someone downgrades your natural age and feel pleased instead. I'm still cross if told I look young "for my age"...so I guess I havent hit it yet at 44 BUT give me 10 more years and I might start simpering....or get imaginary Alzheimers so I have an excuse to start slapping people...ha-ha!

We ALL have these hangs up honey. And you are putting it beautifully into words. Your post was stunning...rang so true for what so many of us feel. I hate being treated as an older person. I sub teach and recently some of the kids were asking me if I was another teachers "grandma". I was so embarrased as the teacher was right there in front of me. I could have died. Aging is painful. At least for me. Please keep posting. You are beautiful.

I hate being treated as an older person. I sub teach and recently some of the kids were asking me if I was another teachers "grandma". I was so embarrased as the teacher was right there in front of me. I could have died. Aging is painful. At least for me.
I understand how you can feel about that comment as i work around 20 yr olds who comment on their ''over the hill'' 40 yr old parents.. well i just laugh and think oh well i at 42 have more fun and energy than these ''Old Acting'' 20 yr olds.. Look at Jack Lalane... at 92 he does 500 pushups a day and execises 2 hours every day .. what an insperation!! I trip out that the 20 yr olds are always wanting me to play hoops with them like they don't see me as ''over the hill'' but its attitude i guess......Later !!

:angel: GOD BLESS US ALL,YES WE ARE ALL OLD,OR WE WOULDNT BE ON THIS HEALTHBOARD,LOOKING UP PAIN PROBLEMS,WE SHOULD ALL TELL THE TRUTH TO EACH OTHER..NUMBER 1 WHEN PEOPLE SAY ,OH YOU DONT LOOK THAT OLD,THERE LYING TO YOU..THE BEAUTY SALON IS TREATING YOU THE WAY THEY SEE YOU,ANCIENT HISTORY..HEALTHY YOUNG PEOPLE,DONT KNOW WHAT A HEALTHBOARD IS....IF YOU ARE LOOKING ARE READING THIS,YOUR JUST LIKE ME,WORE OUT,TRYING TO GET A FEW MORE YEARS...THATS OK ,LETS TRY,THATS ALL WE CAN DO..I HAVE NEVER THOUGHT BEAUTY SALONS ARE VERY HELPFUL,WHEN YOU REACH PAST 50 ,FOR A WOMEN,ITS JUST TO AMUSE YOURSELF I GUESS..MEN LIKE LOOKING AT 18 TO 25 YEAR OLDS,DONT LET YOUR HUSBAND KID YOU,HE LOOKS..THERE STILL GOT IT IN ALL THE RIGHT PLACES,DONT MATTER WHAT THEY WEAR...WE CANT SAY THAT,I REMEMBER WHEN I WAS YOUNG,I COULD PUT ON A OLD SHIRT ,NO FAT NO WHERE..NOW ALL OF US,TRY TO HIDE THIS OR THAT..YOU GOT WRINGLES,WELL WELL WHEN THEY TELL ME I LOOK GOOD FOR MY AGE,FOR MY AGE THATS SHOULD SEND BELLS OFF IN YOUR HEAD...THEY JUST TOLD YOU A LIE..I LIKE PEOPLE TO BE HONEST,DONT SUGAR COAT ME..WE ARE OLD WHY CANT WE ALL JUST ADMIT IT..LOVE YOU GUYS.. :angel:

'What is old; am I there yet?' Can a 75 year chip-in by saying that it's all relative! I remarried 3 years ago to a young 'chick' of 58 and I still believe that I have a future! I am healthy, fit, suffer no aches nor pains, still have a healthy libido, dance and exercise regularly, still court my wife, and, indeed, other than following full-time employment I feel no older than I did in my 40s and 50s. My daughters say that I am long-lived but I don't believe them; it's just that they themselves are getting older while I am marking-time so you may appreciate that it's all relative!

Why am I on this forum? Simply to see what I can learn as an avocational interest.

Can a 75 year chip-in by saying that it's all relative! I remarried 3 years ago to a young 'chick' of 58 and I still believe that I have a future! I am healthy, fit, suffer no aches nor pains, still have a healthy libido, dance and exercise regularly, still court my wife, and, indeed, other than following full-time employment I feel no older than I did in my 40s and 50s. Right on Omaar way to go....I hope you'll lets us in to your youthful/longevity secret...Diet, attitude, redwine ?? Your story is an insperation dude.....

I feel an odd one out of sorts sometimes, but I think it's because society puts expectations on us to act a certain way at a certain age, which when you think of it is totally ridiculous. Do what you enjoy doing, and dont let people make you feel bad about it.
You may be suprised to learn that because of my love for music which I have had since a little girl (The Beatles were my first Group...lol ) that this last year I have been to concerts from Several groups in the top 40 (Backstreet Boys ...Avril Lavigne ......Hedley ...Simple Plan...Hilary Duff ..and many more)
Simply because I LOVE Their music...in fact most music in the charts ... For me it's a treat when I sit in my dentist chair and flip the ceiling TV channel to Much Music because I dont have cable at home ....And you also may be suprised to learn I am going to be 50 this coming year.
Should I stop doing what I enjoy simply because society expects me to act a certain way for my age? Dont let anyone do that to you ...be yourself...remember " In Every Adult Is A Child Screaming WHAT HAPPENED " ha ha ..be happy be yourself and love life :-)

This is my first post on this message board, and I found this thread to be interesting.

In August, I'll hit the big 50, but it's not a big deal. I never looked my age, and I still don't. Ever since I was in my mid-20s, I made a firm resolution that unless you were marrying me or insuring me, my age was none of your damned business. :)

That happened because I went to college full time at 24, an age when most kids are already out of school. I didn't look older, but when I was honest about my age, I got so many strange looks that I decided it was time to keep it to myself.

That actually stopped all the questions. So I've been fudging my age for almost 25 years, and I'm used to it! I'm looking forward to the day I can just BE my age, and no one's going to think it's a big deal.

You know, basing this on people I know who are 10-15 years younger (and on my own memories of how I felt), it's just an ignorant prejudice. No one wants to be old, based upon how we see "old people" - our grandparents, people in nursing homes, that sort of thing.

But reality check: some of us are going to look like our grandparents, some of us may wind up in nursing homes, some of us may use wheelchairs. So what?

You have two choices: old or dead. And no, dead isn't better. You have to reach a point when you realize you trade some of the things of youth for some of the advantages of age - the best being a little wisdom.

I don't envy anyone younger; they'll be where I am in the blink of an eye, wondering how they got "old." Everyone has their time, the moments when they are young and dumb, and hopefully they learn a few things as compensation. (To be honest, a lot of people just age and don't get any smarter. It's really sad to be judging yourself by the same criteria you used at 20 or 30!)

If you simply refuse to let yourself by defined by anyone's stereotypes, and just live your life, no matter what it turns out to be, you'll be a lot happier. There's not a thing you can do to change getting older (but then, neither can the "kids" who will be where you are before much longer.) The only thing you can really change is how you look at it.

And if it really bothers you, lie. :)

The woman on the last post couldn't have said it better. i'm 54 and i certainly would not want to turn back the clock for anything ,even though I was pretty hot in my younger days LOL! I love being older and wiser and not so focused on the outer but on the inner. Some days I have to admit i get up moaning and groaning from all the aches and pains etc ,but i push right through it and enjoy my life as best i can. My husband just bought a Harley Davidson. Now in my younger days i would have been appalled ,and scared to death to get on it ,but now i'm ready for some great adventures!. One thing i didn't agree with is lying about my age. I do admit i look quite young for my age ,and so i love it when people find out how old i am and they are so surprised. It's quite the ego boost. I am proud to be 54 and still young at heart. I want to teach my 2 daughters that getting old is nothing to be ashamed of and not something to be "cured" of ,like some of these cosmetic commercials that I see on t.v. . They act like getting old is a disease that can be cured with their product ,or plastic surgery etc. I'm not falling for it! ;)

Age is really what you make of it. Some people are 35 and feel old, some people are 60 and still feel bright and fresh. If you don't feel old, then you aren't. Enjoy life and keep on rocking!

I may have a solution...When I was 22 and went to a 40th birthday of a relative, I would thing, wow he/she is old. Today when I have myself crossed that threshold my mindset has changed. Few years ago I became extremely depressed and anxious when I felt life was slipping by and started and looking older than my years and was hospitalized and given medication. A friend then referred me to a free meditation tool that changed my life. I now use this and a 15 second exercise daily and feel much better. I have taken it upon myself to spread the message to those of you who are in the boat I was in.. take hope there are several good tools to help you look at your life differently and possibly help reverse ageing or at least help you enjoy your life.. Remember it is up to you to take charge. I am glad I did.

The year I turned thirty, I moped around feeling soooo old, my sister bless her heart one day after all my complaining said, for crying out loud your only going to be 29. I've always been off by a year, you'd think I'd know my own birthday. I guess the only advantage is that when it rolls around each year, I get to roll it back. Over the years I have had my share of ailments, but I always find it amazing that while the body is going to pot, the mind is full throttle ahead. The nice thing about ageing is that you have time, to take time for all the things that you thought were mundane and perhaps of little importance when you were younger.

When my kids were young I never had time to just enjoy them, I always had something to do, now when the grandkids come, I get such a kick out of just knowing that I can do whatever I want with them.

The other day my grandson said, gramma do you file your fingernails? He's 7, I said sure honey why do you ask, he said your nails are so long. My mother files mine once a week. It dawned on me that because his mother's nails are short that he thought I didn't take care of mine and just let them grow, then I started reminiscing about my own grandmother who at 62, would never have thought about manicured nails, or lotions, or waxed brows, shaving her legs etc. For her organdy dresses and little white hats with tiny handkerchiefs, embroidered with lace and a small brooch, was her signature. Then my mother popped into mind, there she was with her mad hatter hat and her blazing red shorts and shoes to match, she was vogue and eclectic.

It made me realize how special and unique we all are, weathering the storms, embracing the good, making our way through life, ageing may throw us a few curves, as we're winding down, but now instead of always looking to see where we're going, which we need to, we get to look back to see where we've been, and all the stuff in between. I think ageing reminds us of just how fragile we really are, but at the same time it reinforces our will to live and derive as much productivity and pleasure from life as we can get, that's a good thing.

I thank God when I wake up every day that he has given me the time I have lived but some days I really want to ask, "What were you thinking?" I used to wake up feeling energetic, now I can hardly get out of bed. I used to stay up all night, now I need all night to sleep, I used to wouldn't go out of the house without makeup, now I don;t even bother to put on makeup, I used to have long, dark, beautiful hair, now it's short and has to be colored, I used to fit in a size 5, now I couldn't get my big toe in that! Getting older really sucks at times but...it means I have one more day to live with my wonderful husband, son and beautiful granchildren, so I gladly take what the Lord has given me and run with it....well, maybe walk, LOL!

This caught my eye as I was zipping by. I usually lurk on the Alzheimer section of the board. I am, by my mother's reconning, 21 years old.[remember my mother has alzheimer's.] Las Oct. she told my hubby of 32 years that she never once regretted being pregnant with me 20 years ago...so when my birthday came around in February, i decided that made me 21, right? Our 28 year old son is confused by this, and the 25 year old just blows it off.

I am, if my birth certificate is right, 55 this past February. When I turned 50 I called my mom and asked her if she was sure that that was the right year on my birth certificate..I do not know how I got to this age, and am certainly puzzled by the fact that i have gray hair and a lowering sense of gravity. I resent the age restrictions that my body voluntarily gives me...but then i just fight back. I refuse to feel old-even though i am recovering from 2 back surgeries within a week, a broken back, too much therapy, a blood clot that went from calf to groin and pulmenary embolisms that went to both lungs. i survived surgery and most of the therapy, but am facing two to three more years to regain the use of my leg. I work full time taking care of the "young-uns" as i call the young staffers, they keep me young and they think i'm "cool." what more could I ask? Age is a state of mind, and you decide what your age ieach and every day when you get up..

I ask you in closing, to consider the magnet that i keep on the fridge at work..
"How old would you be if you didn't know how old you really were?"

You may grow old....but growing up is optional.;)

Hi Connie........
I hope this reaches you as I have not seen any posts from you in over 2 years. In the short time that you posted, I really appreciated your wit and maturity concerning the subject of the total enjoyment of life and particularly now that you have reached the golden years. I hope that this is continuing as it is likewise for myself and my wife at 74 & 72. I am in total agreement with everything you had to say and I miss your posts very much. I wish you would return to posting as I am sure you would have many similar heartening thoughts to contribute. It is so enlightening to read such nice pure loving thoughts as yours. I doubt if you can but if it’s possible, let me know where you post.