Hi all. First off, just wanted to say that I've been reading all the postings here for a couple of months now. I love this site, and think it's wonderful. My situation is as follows, I'm a recovering Alcoholic/addict. I've been sober for over 5 years now. Before I got sober, I have alot of very risky encounters with over 15 women. No protection at all. When I got sober, I got tested for HIV and all other std's. The results were negative. I continued on with my life. I got involved in a wonderful and monogomous relationship with a women that is a recovering ALcoholic as well. She got tested for HIV a couple times and was negative. All tests were 6 months after any kind of possible exposure. About a year ago, I got very ill, Doctors could not pin point what was wrong with me. Severe night sweats, dizziness, weakness, numbness and cold limbs, vision issues including spots and floaters (that haven't gone away yet) and a few other symptoms. The severity of it lasted about 2 weeks. My fear of hiv came back and I got another test. It was negative. Is there any possible way that I may still have HIV with 2 negative results 5 years after possible exposure? I know it sounds crazy, but my OCD and Fear of this is ruining my peace and serenity, and is severely affecting my everyday life. I also have "white tongue". I've had for over 2 weeks now. I'm a little nervous about it. I hope someone can respond, and give me a little feed back, it would be greatly appreciated. And I also wanted to add that I totally identify with anyone out there that have extreme fear and ocd with the thought of HIV. If anyone needs to chat about there emotions, I'm a great listener and would love to hear from you. Thank you. My name is Shannon, by the way, and I'm a 30 year old male.

Congratulations, Shannon, on your sobriety. :) ...and your wonderful relationship.

A test 3 months after exposure is a conclusive test. Your 2 tests (one of which was 5 years after exposure) cements the fact that you do not have HIV.

Your girlfriends test at 6 months post exposure is conclusive. She does not have HIV...barring she's on any immune suppressing drugs (such as from an organ transplant). In that case, it would take at least a year (I believe) to get a conclusive result. But, I would assume that she hasn't had an organ transplant.

You are negative. She is negative. Believe it an find comfort in it. I do understand the obsessive nature (I think I'm a bit OCD myself). Do you have a copy of your test results? If not, I'd get one. As silly as it sounds, I found it comforting to look at it over and over again just to make sure "she really DID say negative" "They didn't give me someone elses results" "I wasn't dreaming the whole thing" "it does have MY name on the paper" ...seriously, I did go through each of those questions. And, having that paper is a sort of comfort to me when I started getting all panicky again....which I haven't done for a while, thank God.

Well, I hope this helps you.
I look forward to hearing from you.
God bless,
Cali

Thank you Cali for responding. I really appreciate it. About the copy of the test, I had it here for a while then I threw it away thinking my fear was over. LOL Guess not. Good idea to go back and get another copy of it though. I guess my physical symptoms triggered my fear again. I have Generalized Anxiety Disorder, and there are alot of similar symptoms to HIV that come with it. Right now, my current obsession is my white coated tongue. I've had it for about 2 weeks now, and nothing is working to help it go away. Do you know anything about this wierd white tongue thing? I can deal with mono or strep throat, but strange symptoms with no apparent cause kinda gets me nervous lol. My Doc said I'm paraniod and that it's no big deal. (God I wish they had doctors that were sensative to peoples emotions) But anyway, any knowledge on the white tongue thing would be great, if there are any known causes and treatments or anything. Thanks again for responding, much appreciated, and God Bless you too :)

shannon

It's my pleasure to be here with you, sweetheart. :)

I don't know anything about the white tongue...BUT, stress will cause all sorts of weird things to go on in your body. Any and every symptom could be attributed to stress....and, unfortunately, any and every symptom can be attributed to HIV.

I once got hives all over my arms during the wait for my test results. I had stressed myself that badly.

Sure, the white tongue could be something else, but it could very easily be stress related. What it's NOT is HIV.

With love,
Cali

Just curious, does anyone have any suggestions on how to get rid of my fear once and for all without having to get yet another test? Also, when I got my last test, it was a couple weeks after I was sick with some mysterious illness that could've been the flu, mono, or even anxiety/stress related sickness. Could this sickness have affected my test results? If so How? Could it have caused a false negative somehow? Any responses would be greatly appreciated. And thanks again Cali for your support. :) Hope all is well. shannon

Hello shannon :)
Our bodies can fight between 3 to 7 viruses and countless numbers of bacteria a day without us even knowing it !
Hiv is a very straight forward virus and even though it basicaly throughs a blanket party for our immune system and can catch it off guard our immune system responds quickly to counter attack it .
One of the best ways is to generate antibodies which are tiny protiens that ( like magnets ) bind to hiv's body and flash ( like a strobe light ) until one of the whiteblood cells come along and destroy it . Some antibodies have a special ability known as ( COMPLIMENT ) which means that the antibody can actualy destroy a virus or bacteria by itself so there are many kinds of antibodies that can do many different things and what the hiv tests look for is any kind of reaction to the sample viral protiens on the test .
The test has what's called a ( CONTROL LINE ) that does 2 things
1) it acts as a timer and says when the test is done .........
And
2) it also says that the test is working properly
So if you tested 3 and 6 months and had a negative both times then you are ROCK SOLID beyond a questionable doubt NEGATIVE !!!!!!!!!!!!!
Congratualtions on you're sobriety and new lifestyle and I hope god has many many blessings on store for you and also you're love :)
As far as being sick or if you're having problems then you realy do need to see you're doctor and have them checkes out because you don't want to turn a blind eye and overlook anything while you're living in fear of a disease you DON'T HAVE :nono:
........... Lost Spirit ...............

Cali and Lost Spirit, Thanks for your responses. And in response to Lost Spirit, I've been to the doc's my share of times believe me. He can't seem to find anything wrong with me. I began seeing a Good Therapist, (which is probably the kind of doctor I need most LOL) I've only been seeing her for a month now, so I haven't made any major breakthroughs as to why I have this particular fear so bad. Especially after all the evidence to the contrary. In my five years of recovery from alcoholism, I've worked through so many issues, and risen above so many things, I've made so much progress, and have had a lot of mental, emotional, and spiritual growth. So when I come across an obsession like this one, (one that completely takes me away from my life and from God) I get a little discourage, and I guess my pride gets hurt. But I have alot of hope and faith that I will eventually rise above this fear and obstacle as well. In the meantime, every little bit helps and I'm glad I've found this site. You all seem like very kind and compassionate people. Hope I can keep in touch. God Bless :) Shannon