tumbino
02-15-2006, 05:26 PM
My husband was recently diagnosed with high cholesterol and some mild heart problems. His doctor ran a full battery of tests, prescribed medication, and gave specific recommendations for changes in diet and exercise.
Everything but the diet and exercise component is going well. DH takes his medication regularly, but exercises sporadically. I can't put him on the treadmill and press "start," but I've really tried to shop and cook in the recommended way. DH still prefers the "regular" food that the kids eat (we have 7 young children), and the kids complain when I try to cut out their favorites so DH won't have temptation around. Never mind the fast-food stops when he's on the road or the junk at office luncheons. I've offered to pack him healthy lunches, which he's declined (too much trouble, hassle lugging it around, can just come home for lunch - maybe, etc.) Same with breakfast (not enough time, not hungry in the morning, don't need it).
I'd greatly appreciate advice on what you or family members have found to be helpful and supportive in encouraging compliance with dietary restrictions. I seriously don't want to be put in the position of being the "food police" and don't want to turn into a nag, but I also don't want to be a young widow or too-soon caretaker of someone who didn't care to make healthy choices for himself. These are things I've discussed with him a number of times, and ultimately it's his decision, I know, but I'm incredibly frustrated. I'd like to hear from anyone who has found a way to be supportive without being turned into the bad guy in the kitchen. In December he had a heart scare, which should have been enough of a wake-up call; what does it take for a person to take this stuff seriously?
Thank you very, very much for any direction you can give me. As you can probably tell, I'm more than a little aggrevated by this. I've seen this same thing play out between other of my family members, and it's a game I really don't care to play.
Everything but the diet and exercise component is going well. DH takes his medication regularly, but exercises sporadically. I can't put him on the treadmill and press "start," but I've really tried to shop and cook in the recommended way. DH still prefers the "regular" food that the kids eat (we have 7 young children), and the kids complain when I try to cut out their favorites so DH won't have temptation around. Never mind the fast-food stops when he's on the road or the junk at office luncheons. I've offered to pack him healthy lunches, which he's declined (too much trouble, hassle lugging it around, can just come home for lunch - maybe, etc.) Same with breakfast (not enough time, not hungry in the morning, don't need it).
I'd greatly appreciate advice on what you or family members have found to be helpful and supportive in encouraging compliance with dietary restrictions. I seriously don't want to be put in the position of being the "food police" and don't want to turn into a nag, but I also don't want to be a young widow or too-soon caretaker of someone who didn't care to make healthy choices for himself. These are things I've discussed with him a number of times, and ultimately it's his decision, I know, but I'm incredibly frustrated. I'd like to hear from anyone who has found a way to be supportive without being turned into the bad guy in the kitchen. In December he had a heart scare, which should have been enough of a wake-up call; what does it take for a person to take this stuff seriously?
Thank you very, very much for any direction you can give me. As you can probably tell, I'm more than a little aggrevated by this. I've seen this same thing play out between other of my family members, and it's a game I really don't care to play.
Sponsor
JJ
02-16-2006, 01:09 AM
My husband was recently diagnosed with high cholesterol and some mild heart problems. His doctor ran a full battery of tests, prescribed medication, and gave specific recommendations for changes in diet and exercise.
Everything but the diet and exercise component is going well. DH takes his medication regularly, but exercises sporadically. I can't put him on the treadmill and press "start," but I've really tried to shop and cook in the recommended way. DH still prefers the "regular" food that the kids eat (we have 7 young children), and the kids complain when I try to cut out their favorites so DH won't have temptation around. Never mind the fast-food stops when he's on the road or the junk at office luncheons. I've offered to pack him healthy lunches, which he's declined (too much trouble, hassle lugging it around, can just come home for lunch - maybe, etc.) Same with breakfast (not enough time, not hungry in the morning, don't need it).
I'd greatly appreciate advice on what you or family members have found to be helpful and supportive in encouraging compliance with dietary restrictions. I seriously don't want to be put in the position of being the "food police" and don't want to turn into a nag, but I also don't want to be a young widow or too-soon caretaker of someone who didn't care to make healthy choices for himself. These are things I've discussed with him a number of times, and ultimately it's his decision, I know, but I'm incredibly frustrated. I'd like to hear from anyone who has found a way to be supportive without being turned into the bad guy in the kitchen. In December he had a heart scare, which should have been enough of a wake-up call; what does it take for a person to take this stuff seriously?
Thank you very, very much for any direction you can give me. As you can probably tell, I'm more than a little aggrevated by this. I've seen this same thing play out between other of my family members, and it's a game I really don't care to play.
It sure sounds like U are doing everything possible to get him to eat properly, but guess he isn't willing to help himself. I feel for you and understand your frustration, but, like they say, U can't help anyone who doesn't want to help themselves. Hopefully he will get it thru his head he needs to do something to keep himself healthy. Sounds to me like he feels taking meds. is going to cure everything and let him off the hook. JMHO
Have U talked with his dr.? At one time my hubby was being a lil stubborn about his diet and I knew he was sneaking stuff into his diet that he shouldn't, and like U, felt like a nag. I finally told him.."fine, eat as you please, just don't expect me to be your keeper if anything happens because U won't try"! After that he started doing alot better, plus at his next drs. appt. I took the day off from work and went too, and told the dr. he wasn't exactly being a very "good boy". Dr. had a chat with him and explained he didn't have to completely stop all the things he liked, just had to cut back, and after that, things went fine. Guess some folks need a lil shove.
Good luck, and best wishes....... :wave:
Everything but the diet and exercise component is going well. DH takes his medication regularly, but exercises sporadically. I can't put him on the treadmill and press "start," but I've really tried to shop and cook in the recommended way. DH still prefers the "regular" food that the kids eat (we have 7 young children), and the kids complain when I try to cut out their favorites so DH won't have temptation around. Never mind the fast-food stops when he's on the road or the junk at office luncheons. I've offered to pack him healthy lunches, which he's declined (too much trouble, hassle lugging it around, can just come home for lunch - maybe, etc.) Same with breakfast (not enough time, not hungry in the morning, don't need it).
I'd greatly appreciate advice on what you or family members have found to be helpful and supportive in encouraging compliance with dietary restrictions. I seriously don't want to be put in the position of being the "food police" and don't want to turn into a nag, but I also don't want to be a young widow or too-soon caretaker of someone who didn't care to make healthy choices for himself. These are things I've discussed with him a number of times, and ultimately it's his decision, I know, but I'm incredibly frustrated. I'd like to hear from anyone who has found a way to be supportive without being turned into the bad guy in the kitchen. In December he had a heart scare, which should have been enough of a wake-up call; what does it take for a person to take this stuff seriously?
Thank you very, very much for any direction you can give me. As you can probably tell, I'm more than a little aggrevated by this. I've seen this same thing play out between other of my family members, and it's a game I really don't care to play.
It sure sounds like U are doing everything possible to get him to eat properly, but guess he isn't willing to help himself. I feel for you and understand your frustration, but, like they say, U can't help anyone who doesn't want to help themselves. Hopefully he will get it thru his head he needs to do something to keep himself healthy. Sounds to me like he feels taking meds. is going to cure everything and let him off the hook. JMHO
Have U talked with his dr.? At one time my hubby was being a lil stubborn about his diet and I knew he was sneaking stuff into his diet that he shouldn't, and like U, felt like a nag. I finally told him.."fine, eat as you please, just don't expect me to be your keeper if anything happens because U won't try"! After that he started doing alot better, plus at his next drs. appt. I took the day off from work and went too, and told the dr. he wasn't exactly being a very "good boy". Dr. had a chat with him and explained he didn't have to completely stop all the things he liked, just had to cut back, and after that, things went fine. Guess some folks need a lil shove.
Good luck, and best wishes....... :wave:
Lenin
02-16-2006, 08:28 AM
tumbino,
If there are 9 of you eating in the household, the only way to get one compliant with a healthy diet is to get the other 8 compliant also. A two, three or 4 diet household CANNOT work...and the work TRYING to make it work is Herculean.
So it looks like either the 9 of you eat a heart healthy diet or none of you do.
If there are 9 of you eating in the household, the only way to get one compliant with a healthy diet is to get the other 8 compliant also. A two, three or 4 diet household CANNOT work...and the work TRYING to make it work is Herculean.
So it looks like either the 9 of you eat a heart healthy diet or none of you do.
Tobias
02-16-2006, 04:37 PM
You can't make someone do what you want. Hard as you may try, you just can't (not, and remain their friend instead of their keeper). And you'll drive yourself crazy if you try. The onus is on you (if you are the chief shopper & cook of your household) to prepare healthy meals, but the onus is on HIM when he eats elsewhere. I agree with the poster that said either you all have to eat healthy or none of you do. I agree to a point. However, to be successful he has to also learn how to eat in the real world and the real world does as they darn please and the real world eats junk food sometimes. That doesn't mean he has to.
Maybe if you send him out to buy some extra life insurance (just in case)...
Maybe if you send him out to buy some extra life insurance (just in case)...
tumbino
02-16-2006, 05:32 PM
Thanks for the replies so far. JJ, I did go with him to his first visit with the cardiologist and was able to ask the doctor some questions; I had hoped that it would not only be informative for me, but that it would also show DH that I was willing to go into this with him and be supportive in whatever way necessary. I've also bought him a home blood pressure monitor, done research on the internet, bought the American Heart Association cookbook, and have generally pursued anything that might be helpful. I've even gone on the plan myself, because it's healthy for anyone. I thought about going to his follow-up visit at the start of this month, but didn't because I sometimes get the feeling that he thinks I'm trying to be his nanny, and I don't want to create resentment. I guess that's my real problem - knowing how much of what I'm doing is actually helpful within limits, without trying to act like his mom.
Lenin and Tobias, you've made my point for me - THANK YOU! When he first got his orders, I did make the argument that I wasn't going to run the kitchen like a restaurant, where everyone can order something different. Also, his food plan *is* good for the kids, too, and I could stand to lose a few post-pregnancy pounds (the youngest is almost 3 months old). What happens is that the best intentions go astray, and over time everyone has slid back into old habits, with me being the voice of dissention. Add to it that occasionally DH will do some surprise grocery shopping on the way home, with a few treats "for the kids" (and how much of it doesn't make it to the kids?)
However, your input does encourage me to make more of the argument that we *all* need to get onto the same plan. As for kids' treats, they still get stuff at school, at their friends' houses, and occasionally if I'm out running errands with one or more of them, I'll stop and get something for them (not for me) that they can finish on the spot without dragging it into the house. I appreciate knowing that I'm not totally the bad guy in this; thanks again.
Lenin and Tobias, you've made my point for me - THANK YOU! When he first got his orders, I did make the argument that I wasn't going to run the kitchen like a restaurant, where everyone can order something different. Also, his food plan *is* good for the kids, too, and I could stand to lose a few post-pregnancy pounds (the youngest is almost 3 months old). What happens is that the best intentions go astray, and over time everyone has slid back into old habits, with me being the voice of dissention. Add to it that occasionally DH will do some surprise grocery shopping on the way home, with a few treats "for the kids" (and how much of it doesn't make it to the kids?)
However, your input does encourage me to make more of the argument that we *all* need to get onto the same plan. As for kids' treats, they still get stuff at school, at their friends' houses, and occasionally if I'm out running errands with one or more of them, I'll stop and get something for them (not for me) that they can finish on the spot without dragging it into the house. I appreciate knowing that I'm not totally the bad guy in this; thanks again.
JJ
02-16-2006, 08:08 PM
Thanks for the replies so far. JJ, I did go with him to his first visit with the cardiologist and was able to ask the doctor some questions; I had hoped that it would not only be informative for me, but that it would also show DH that I was willing to go into this with him and be supportive in whatever way necessary. I've also bought him a home blood pressure monitor, done research on the internet, bought the American Heart Association cookbook, and have generally pursued anything that might be helpful. I've even gone on the plan myself, because it's healthy for anyone. I thought about going to his follow-up visit at the start of this month, but didn't because I sometimes get the feeling that he thinks I'm trying to be his nanny, and I don't want to create resentment. I guess that's my real problem - knowing how much of what I'm doing is actually helpful within limits, without trying to act like his mom.
Lenin and Tobias, you've made my point for me - THANK YOU! When he first got his orders, I did make the argument that I wasn't going to run the kitchen like a restaurant, where everyone can order something different. Also, his food plan *is* good for the kids, too, and I could stand to lose a few post-pregnancy pounds (the youngest is almost 3 months old). What happens is that the best intentions go astray, and over time everyone has slid back into old habits, with me being the voice of dissention. Add to it that occasionally DH will do some surprise grocery shopping on the way home, with a few treats "for the kids" (and how much of it doesn't make it to the kids?)
However, your input does encourage me to make more of the argument that we *all* need to get onto the same plan. As for kids' treats, they still get stuff at school, at their friends' houses, and occasionally if I'm out running errands with one or more of them, I'll stop and get something for them (not for me) that they can finish on the spot without dragging it into the house. I appreciate knowing that I'm not totally the bad guy in this; thanks again.
Nope, your not the "bad guy" in this. I think everything U are doing so far is good and like I said, it is up to him to try harder. Try using a little reverse phycology on him. Tell him U and the children intend to eat smart and healthy and if he choses not to, he can fix his own meals, bet that stops him, and if he still insists on eating unhealthy, U would appreciate he upped his life insurance. I know, it sounds cruel, but some times tuff love is the way to go.
Even if he get a lil miffed at ya for a couple of days, don't give in, just let him stew till he comes to his senses. He doesn't have to be a total health freak, but he has to learn to eat properly most of the time and only give himself a treat once in awhile. With a new baby and other children, the last thing U need is to have another "child" on your hands. JMHO U can't please everyone, and trying to is just going to make U run down and maybe become ill, and then everyone will suffer.
Best wishes, and keep us posted how it goes..... :wave:
Lenin and Tobias, you've made my point for me - THANK YOU! When he first got his orders, I did make the argument that I wasn't going to run the kitchen like a restaurant, where everyone can order something different. Also, his food plan *is* good for the kids, too, and I could stand to lose a few post-pregnancy pounds (the youngest is almost 3 months old). What happens is that the best intentions go astray, and over time everyone has slid back into old habits, with me being the voice of dissention. Add to it that occasionally DH will do some surprise grocery shopping on the way home, with a few treats "for the kids" (and how much of it doesn't make it to the kids?)
However, your input does encourage me to make more of the argument that we *all* need to get onto the same plan. As for kids' treats, they still get stuff at school, at their friends' houses, and occasionally if I'm out running errands with one or more of them, I'll stop and get something for them (not for me) that they can finish on the spot without dragging it into the house. I appreciate knowing that I'm not totally the bad guy in this; thanks again.
Nope, your not the "bad guy" in this. I think everything U are doing so far is good and like I said, it is up to him to try harder. Try using a little reverse phycology on him. Tell him U and the children intend to eat smart and healthy and if he choses not to, he can fix his own meals, bet that stops him, and if he still insists on eating unhealthy, U would appreciate he upped his life insurance. I know, it sounds cruel, but some times tuff love is the way to go.
Even if he get a lil miffed at ya for a couple of days, don't give in, just let him stew till he comes to his senses. He doesn't have to be a total health freak, but he has to learn to eat properly most of the time and only give himself a treat once in awhile. With a new baby and other children, the last thing U need is to have another "child" on your hands. JMHO U can't please everyone, and trying to is just going to make U run down and maybe become ill, and then everyone will suffer.
Best wishes, and keep us posted how it goes..... :wave:
Stumper
02-16-2006, 09:23 PM
5Tumbino,
There is alot of good advice here but I will go along with Lenin.
I was raised in a family of 9, or 11 with my parents. My mother always made sure there was healthy things to eat around the house like...a LITERAL CRATE of apples. She got these at a local auction that always had LOTS of fruit. Had to dig for some good ones sometimes though :D That's all they could afford. We had ALOT of oatmeal
Here is what to do:
Have only healthy things around the house. If hungry...well...that's all you have, apples, oranges, peanut butter, graham crackers,,BUT leave a WEE BIT of room for that ocassional sweets, don't get TOO strict. My mother always had good homemade oatmeal cookies or homemade bread and butter (real stuff), sesame cookin, and so forth.
NOW....if he wishes to go above and beyond what you have...well....you've done all you could. I would not naag him because he might eat it just to annoy you, and that is counterproductive.
2
There is alot of good advice here but I will go along with Lenin.
I was raised in a family of 9, or 11 with my parents. My mother always made sure there was healthy things to eat around the house like...a LITERAL CRATE of apples. She got these at a local auction that always had LOTS of fruit. Had to dig for some good ones sometimes though :D That's all they could afford. We had ALOT of oatmeal
Here is what to do:
Have only healthy things around the house. If hungry...well...that's all you have, apples, oranges, peanut butter, graham crackers,,BUT leave a WEE BIT of room for that ocassional sweets, don't get TOO strict. My mother always had good homemade oatmeal cookies or homemade bread and butter (real stuff), sesame cookin, and so forth.
NOW....if he wishes to go above and beyond what you have...well....you've done all you could. I would not naag him because he might eat it just to annoy you, and that is counterproductive.
2
HubbleRules
02-16-2006, 09:27 PM
Tumbino,
Can you tell us a little more about your husband's health situation?
What are his cholesterol numbers, how old is he, is he overweight, diabetic, have a family history of heart problems?
What is his mild 'heart problem', and what was the 'heart scare' that you mentioned in December about?
It's hard to give advice with no specifics to go on.
As for telling him to 'up his life insurance', I'd advise against it - would be a major mistake IMHO. If anyone told me that, I'd begin to think they regarded me as nothing but a walking-paycheck.
HubbleRules
:cool:
Can you tell us a little more about your husband's health situation?
What are his cholesterol numbers, how old is he, is he overweight, diabetic, have a family history of heart problems?
What is his mild 'heart problem', and what was the 'heart scare' that you mentioned in December about?
It's hard to give advice with no specifics to go on.
As for telling him to 'up his life insurance', I'd advise against it - would be a major mistake IMHO. If anyone told me that, I'd begin to think they regarded me as nothing but a walking-paycheck.
HubbleRules
:cool:
Stumper
02-16-2006, 09:31 PM
Tumbino,
BTW,,,,,bless you for having 7 children ! :) Unless you are Amish That INDEED is a rarity today. Wish you the best of luck and happiness in raising them. :) :)
BTW,,,,,bless you for having 7 children ! :) Unless you are Amish That INDEED is a rarity today. Wish you the best of luck and happiness in raising them. :) :)
tumbino
02-16-2006, 10:24 PM
Thanks for the backup, JJ and Stumper. We're not Amish, but we do have the large-family tradition in common with them. :) DH was actually one of 13 kids, so 7 is no biggie for him. It's been quite an adjustment for me, however (just me and my brother growing up).
HubbleRules, here's some additional info: DH is 41, about 20 pounds overweight, and I don't know his exact HDL/LDL numbers, but the doctor said that DH could probably get them in the healthy range through diet and exercise. The medication he was prescribed is for high blood pressure, and DH has an abnormally slow heart rate which might be addressed down the road with a pacemaker.
DH has another appointment in six months, and there will be no way in the interim to tell if dietary changes are enough to fix the cholesterol problem if he doesn't *make* any dietary changes.
In December, he fainted while giving a lecture and was taken to the emergency room, where his heart stopped beating for a few seconds, twice. It hasn't happened before then or since, which is good, and we did find out from his mom that his dad had been on blood pressure medications for a number of years. One of his brothers is sodium-restricted, and most of his family seems to be a little chunky once they hit middle-age. However, there's no history of heart attacks, strokes, or anything like that. I've wondered, though, if it's because they tend to have a much healthier diet. They live in a country that favors what's called the Mediterranean Diet here, and there's not all of the junk that's so easily available here. That's why I'm so stuck on changing our diet; it seems like it might be the real "swing factor" in deciding if DH's predispositions will be controlled or if they'll lead to more serious health problems.
Also, my family has a huge history of these types of health issues, although I think personality and lifestyle factors contribute heavily in their cases. Could be why I'm taking this more seriously than DH. After 7 kids, my normal weight is still what it was in high school (I'm 38 now) because I exercise and watch what I eat, so it's not like I'm telling everyone in the family to do one thing and then doing something different myself. Again, I just wonder sometimes what has to happen for this to really sink in with him.
Anyway, thank you all so much for your replies; I do feel much better about the approach I've tried to take and this definitely encourages me to stick with it. ;)
HubbleRules, here's some additional info: DH is 41, about 20 pounds overweight, and I don't know his exact HDL/LDL numbers, but the doctor said that DH could probably get them in the healthy range through diet and exercise. The medication he was prescribed is for high blood pressure, and DH has an abnormally slow heart rate which might be addressed down the road with a pacemaker.
DH has another appointment in six months, and there will be no way in the interim to tell if dietary changes are enough to fix the cholesterol problem if he doesn't *make* any dietary changes.
In December, he fainted while giving a lecture and was taken to the emergency room, where his heart stopped beating for a few seconds, twice. It hasn't happened before then or since, which is good, and we did find out from his mom that his dad had been on blood pressure medications for a number of years. One of his brothers is sodium-restricted, and most of his family seems to be a little chunky once they hit middle-age. However, there's no history of heart attacks, strokes, or anything like that. I've wondered, though, if it's because they tend to have a much healthier diet. They live in a country that favors what's called the Mediterranean Diet here, and there's not all of the junk that's so easily available here. That's why I'm so stuck on changing our diet; it seems like it might be the real "swing factor" in deciding if DH's predispositions will be controlled or if they'll lead to more serious health problems.
Also, my family has a huge history of these types of health issues, although I think personality and lifestyle factors contribute heavily in their cases. Could be why I'm taking this more seriously than DH. After 7 kids, my normal weight is still what it was in high school (I'm 38 now) because I exercise and watch what I eat, so it's not like I'm telling everyone in the family to do one thing and then doing something different myself. Again, I just wonder sometimes what has to happen for this to really sink in with him.
Anyway, thank you all so much for your replies; I do feel much better about the approach I've tried to take and this definitely encourages me to stick with it. ;)
HubbleRules
02-16-2006, 10:54 PM
tumbino,
Sounds like your hubby's cholesterol numbers are borderline high if the doctor is willing to treat it with diet and excercise. That's good news...
Something else is going on though - you don't faint from high cholesterol levels. Does the cardiologist have any ideas? I'm sure he's ruled out diabetes, hypoglycemia. Perhaps the slow heart rate could be a factor, and perhaps it does need to be raised. Pace makers are fairly standard procedures nowadays, and there are medications that can help with this also...
High Blood pressure is truely the 'silent killer' - it is very important to get that under control. Maintain a proper weight, avoid salt, take your HBP meds if diet/exercise don't work. My mother and older brother have HBP - and it has been very difficult for them to adjust to the meds - I hope your husband has good luck.
And yes, I think a Mediteranean Diet is an excellent idea - there are far fewer heart attacks and a lower level of CHD in France for example than in the US, despite the fact that the French consume more fat and sweets and alcohol than we do. And it is not a very restrictive diet either - I actually love Olive Oil, nuts and fresh fruits, just have to work more on my fresh veggies...
With 7 kids, you and your husband must be under a lot of stress. Perhaps stress reduction techniques could help. Some people (like me) tend to overeat and fall back into bad eating habits when stressed - perhaps your husband is like this.
I'd just continue preparing the healthy meals, and I think over time your family will become adjusted to it. Change takes time - the bigger the change the more time it can take. Maybe you could start a little slowly - start with a few mediteranean meals a week, and slowly increase them and reduce the less healthy choices over time.
If after several months people are not getting on board, then I think it's time for you to approach the doctor and ask him to explain to your hubby what his health outlook is by continuing his bad habits. Maybe that will scrare him into change.
HubbleRules
:cool:
Sounds like your hubby's cholesterol numbers are borderline high if the doctor is willing to treat it with diet and excercise. That's good news...
Something else is going on though - you don't faint from high cholesterol levels. Does the cardiologist have any ideas? I'm sure he's ruled out diabetes, hypoglycemia. Perhaps the slow heart rate could be a factor, and perhaps it does need to be raised. Pace makers are fairly standard procedures nowadays, and there are medications that can help with this also...
High Blood pressure is truely the 'silent killer' - it is very important to get that under control. Maintain a proper weight, avoid salt, take your HBP meds if diet/exercise don't work. My mother and older brother have HBP - and it has been very difficult for them to adjust to the meds - I hope your husband has good luck.
And yes, I think a Mediteranean Diet is an excellent idea - there are far fewer heart attacks and a lower level of CHD in France for example than in the US, despite the fact that the French consume more fat and sweets and alcohol than we do. And it is not a very restrictive diet either - I actually love Olive Oil, nuts and fresh fruits, just have to work more on my fresh veggies...
With 7 kids, you and your husband must be under a lot of stress. Perhaps stress reduction techniques could help. Some people (like me) tend to overeat and fall back into bad eating habits when stressed - perhaps your husband is like this.
I'd just continue preparing the healthy meals, and I think over time your family will become adjusted to it. Change takes time - the bigger the change the more time it can take. Maybe you could start a little slowly - start with a few mediteranean meals a week, and slowly increase them and reduce the less healthy choices over time.
If after several months people are not getting on board, then I think it's time for you to approach the doctor and ask him to explain to your hubby what his health outlook is by continuing his bad habits. Maybe that will scrare him into change.
HubbleRules
:cool:
Stumper
02-16-2006, 11:21 PM
Tumbino,
Funny thing about pacemakers.....
A slow heartrate by many doctors is thought to be GOOD. Actually, our president has a 37 BPM average !
A slow heartrate can sometimes mean good things. When my heartrate went down to 47 BPM from Atenolol one doctor said it was excellent.
But here again, I do not totally know your husbands full story either.
I would agree with Hubble. Cholesterol does not cause one to faint. Fainting is usually caused by lack of blood flow to the brain. I used to faint when I would get hot standing, like in church or something. What a sight THAT was ! :D
Funny thing about pacemakers.....
A slow heartrate by many doctors is thought to be GOOD. Actually, our president has a 37 BPM average !
A slow heartrate can sometimes mean good things. When my heartrate went down to 47 BPM from Atenolol one doctor said it was excellent.
But here again, I do not totally know your husbands full story either.
I would agree with Hubble. Cholesterol does not cause one to faint. Fainting is usually caused by lack of blood flow to the brain. I used to faint when I would get hot standing, like in church or something. What a sight THAT was ! :D
JJ
02-17-2006, 12:05 AM
tumbino,
Sounds like your hubby's cholesterol numbers are borderline high if the doctor is willing to treat it with diet and excercise. That's good news...
Something else is going on though - you don't faint from high cholesterol levels. Does the cardiologist have any ideas? I'm sure he's ruled out diabetes, hypoglycemia. Perhaps the slow heart rate could be a factor, and perhaps it does need to be raised. Pace makers are fairly standard procedures nowadays, and there are medications that can help with this also...
High Blood pressure is truely the 'silent killer' - it is very important to get that under control. Maintain a proper weight, avoid salt, take your HBP meds if diet/exercise don't work. My mother and older brother have HBP - and it has been very difficult for them to adjust to the meds - I hope your husband has good luck.
And yes, I think a Mediteranean Diet is an excellent idea - there are far fewer heart attacks and a lower level of CHD in France for example than in the US, despite the fact that the French consume more fat and sweets and alcohol than we do. And it is not a very restrictive diet either - I actually love Olive Oil, nuts and fresh fruits, just have to work more on my fresh veggies...
With 7 kids, you and your husband must be under a lot of stress. Perhaps stress reduction techniques could help. Some people (like me) tend to overeat and fall back into bad eating habits when stressed - perhaps your husband is like this.
I'd just continue preparing the healthy meals, and I think over time your family will become adjusted to it. Change takes time - the bigger the change the more time it can take. Maybe you could start a little slowly - start with a few mediteranean meals a week, and slowly increase them and reduce the less healthy choices over time.
If after several months people are not getting on board, then I think it's time for you to approach the doctor and ask him to explain to your hubby what his health outlook is by continuing his bad habits. Maybe that will scrare him into change.
HubbleRules
:cool:
I totally agree with you that her hubby needs some kind of a wakeup call. I know I may have sounded harsh in my reply, but she seems to be doing all she can, especially with 7 children, and one only 3 months old.
He is a grown man, and it does sound like his cholesterol is borderline if the dr. said he may be able to control it with diet and exercise, but he doesn't seem to want to abide by the rules and help. If it was just a cholesterol problem I wouldn't be all that concerned, but he seems to have other issues going on, and I'm sure it is mighty stressful on her as well.
Like I said, if she is doing her part and he won't help himself, maybe a call to the dr. to let him know what is going on might help. Perhaps the dr. could have a nice talk with him and explain he needs to do more to get things under control. JMHO Could be he is in a denial stage, many folks do that when they don't wish to address the situation, especially if he also may be scared but trying not to show it. Hopefully something will get to him before things get out of control, and his situation gets worse.
Sounds like your hubby's cholesterol numbers are borderline high if the doctor is willing to treat it with diet and excercise. That's good news...
Something else is going on though - you don't faint from high cholesterol levels. Does the cardiologist have any ideas? I'm sure he's ruled out diabetes, hypoglycemia. Perhaps the slow heart rate could be a factor, and perhaps it does need to be raised. Pace makers are fairly standard procedures nowadays, and there are medications that can help with this also...
High Blood pressure is truely the 'silent killer' - it is very important to get that under control. Maintain a proper weight, avoid salt, take your HBP meds if diet/exercise don't work. My mother and older brother have HBP - and it has been very difficult for them to adjust to the meds - I hope your husband has good luck.
And yes, I think a Mediteranean Diet is an excellent idea - there are far fewer heart attacks and a lower level of CHD in France for example than in the US, despite the fact that the French consume more fat and sweets and alcohol than we do. And it is not a very restrictive diet either - I actually love Olive Oil, nuts and fresh fruits, just have to work more on my fresh veggies...
With 7 kids, you and your husband must be under a lot of stress. Perhaps stress reduction techniques could help. Some people (like me) tend to overeat and fall back into bad eating habits when stressed - perhaps your husband is like this.
I'd just continue preparing the healthy meals, and I think over time your family will become adjusted to it. Change takes time - the bigger the change the more time it can take. Maybe you could start a little slowly - start with a few mediteranean meals a week, and slowly increase them and reduce the less healthy choices over time.
If after several months people are not getting on board, then I think it's time for you to approach the doctor and ask him to explain to your hubby what his health outlook is by continuing his bad habits. Maybe that will scrare him into change.
HubbleRules
:cool:
I totally agree with you that her hubby needs some kind of a wakeup call. I know I may have sounded harsh in my reply, but she seems to be doing all she can, especially with 7 children, and one only 3 months old.
He is a grown man, and it does sound like his cholesterol is borderline if the dr. said he may be able to control it with diet and exercise, but he doesn't seem to want to abide by the rules and help. If it was just a cholesterol problem I wouldn't be all that concerned, but he seems to have other issues going on, and I'm sure it is mighty stressful on her as well.
Like I said, if she is doing her part and he won't help himself, maybe a call to the dr. to let him know what is going on might help. Perhaps the dr. could have a nice talk with him and explain he needs to do more to get things under control. JMHO Could be he is in a denial stage, many folks do that when they don't wish to address the situation, especially if he also may be scared but trying not to show it. Hopefully something will get to him before things get out of control, and his situation gets worse.
HubbleRules
02-17-2006, 08:06 PM
JJ,
I don't think you were harsh in your response, and I do think that her hubby should take matters more seriously...
You're always my bud :wave:
Let's get down to the Keys and be beach bums (say, I feel like watching Flipper tonight!!!).
TTYL :wave:
HubbleRules
:cool:
I don't think you were harsh in your response, and I do think that her hubby should take matters more seriously...
You're always my bud :wave:
Let's get down to the Keys and be beach bums (say, I feel like watching Flipper tonight!!!).
TTYL :wave:
HubbleRules
:cool:
JJ
02-17-2006, 08:41 PM
JJ,
I don't think you were harsh in your response, and I do think that her hubby should take matters more seriously...
You're always my bud :wave:
Let's get down to the Keys and be beach bums (say, I feel like watching Flipper tonight!!!).
TTYL :wave:
HubbleRules
:cool:
Well I know I had to get really tuff with hubby many years ago. I went to the dr. for a checkup and he mentioned hubby's diabetes, and I asked him what he was talking about. Gee, hubby just FORGOT to mention it to me. Hmmm
When I came home I mentioned it to him and I got an answer of "Oh, I just didn't want U to worry"! Yeah, right!!! At that time he was doing nothing to better his diet for the diabetes, so I went to the store, bought a large bag of candy and dumped it on his bed. He asked me what I was doing, and I told him.."U want to mess up your diabetes diet, well here, have a ball"!! Needless to say he apologized and after that he really got serious about diet and exercise, so I guess I am too use to dealing with a totally stubborn Italian!!
Oh yes, we are still buds, even when we don't always see eye to eye, but hey, that is part of the process of giving advice, we give it and hope the other gives theirs and if we don't agree, then we meet in the middle.
Hubby has to have bloodwork done, his drs. appt. last month didn't go as well as all the other ones. His BP was up, and they found a nodule on his prostate, so we are waiting for drs. appts. for him. He called his cardio guy yesterday, who was leaving for vacation, but took time to call us last nite at 6 before he left. Told ya this guy was a gem!! He had a nice long talk with hubby and also called his reg. dr. and told her to speed it up with getting a urologist to see him, and wants to see hubby when he gets back the beginning of March. After talking to him, hubby seemed much more relaxed and reassured, he has such faith in this guy, I swear if he moves out of CT. we will follow him....LOL So it has been a stressful last few weeks, but things will come together, I always see lite at the end of the tunnel.
Yup, yesterday was gorgeous, but the cold is coming back, so go get us a spot on that beach, as I definitely can become a Beach Bum with absolutely NO problem. I loved Flipper, and wouldn't mind seeing one in person.
Enjoy, and just think SPRING, FLOWERS ETC. ETC. TTYL... :wave: :cool:
I don't think you were harsh in your response, and I do think that her hubby should take matters more seriously...
You're always my bud :wave:
Let's get down to the Keys and be beach bums (say, I feel like watching Flipper tonight!!!).
TTYL :wave:
HubbleRules
:cool:
Well I know I had to get really tuff with hubby many years ago. I went to the dr. for a checkup and he mentioned hubby's diabetes, and I asked him what he was talking about. Gee, hubby just FORGOT to mention it to me. Hmmm
When I came home I mentioned it to him and I got an answer of "Oh, I just didn't want U to worry"! Yeah, right!!! At that time he was doing nothing to better his diet for the diabetes, so I went to the store, bought a large bag of candy and dumped it on his bed. He asked me what I was doing, and I told him.."U want to mess up your diabetes diet, well here, have a ball"!! Needless to say he apologized and after that he really got serious about diet and exercise, so I guess I am too use to dealing with a totally stubborn Italian!!
Oh yes, we are still buds, even when we don't always see eye to eye, but hey, that is part of the process of giving advice, we give it and hope the other gives theirs and if we don't agree, then we meet in the middle.
Hubby has to have bloodwork done, his drs. appt. last month didn't go as well as all the other ones. His BP was up, and they found a nodule on his prostate, so we are waiting for drs. appts. for him. He called his cardio guy yesterday, who was leaving for vacation, but took time to call us last nite at 6 before he left. Told ya this guy was a gem!! He had a nice long talk with hubby and also called his reg. dr. and told her to speed it up with getting a urologist to see him, and wants to see hubby when he gets back the beginning of March. After talking to him, hubby seemed much more relaxed and reassured, he has such faith in this guy, I swear if he moves out of CT. we will follow him....LOL So it has been a stressful last few weeks, but things will come together, I always see lite at the end of the tunnel.
Yup, yesterday was gorgeous, but the cold is coming back, so go get us a spot on that beach, as I definitely can become a Beach Bum with absolutely NO problem. I loved Flipper, and wouldn't mind seeing one in person.
Enjoy, and just think SPRING, FLOWERS ETC. ETC. TTYL... :wave: :cool: