I'm sitting here trying not to cry. I've been crying way to much in the last few days, and I'm just tired of it. I've now got the 'crying headache'. I don't know how much longer I can hang on to this anymore.

This sounds weird, but I'm scared to go find a new job, eventhough I NEED a new job. Part of the problem is that I just don't want to go crawling back to the awful jobs I had before. I want a place I actually like this time.

I'm moving in a month, and you'd think I'd be happy about that. I'm scared stiff. I know I don't like it here where I am now, and the new place is great, but the thought of packing everything and moving to a new place is terrifying.

I was in court this morning to settle the adoption of my kids, which has yet again been postponed. Seems like it's never going to end. Now I just want to go cry.

Jessa,

Though its very hard, you'll get through it somehow, I believe. It sounds like a lot of it is you making it harder for yourself by being overly worried. It's natural to feel scared, especially in the face of considerable challenges, but don't overwhelm yourself. How much of it is the depression? I've felt the same way in similiar situations, but once the thing gets started, I always got through it somehow, if not perfectly. Best wishes. http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/smile.gif

[This message has been edited by Beet (edited 03-26-2003).]

Jessa V ~

I'm sorry to hear of your troubles. I think that crying is a good thing. It sucks but I get in those moments that are endless where you just cry and you feel trapped like you are so low. You don't want to talk to anyone and you don't care to even be around others. I think that you are a strong person for taking all this on. In the end it will work out for you, the trials we face in life make us stronger people just remember that. And hey, your not alone hunny http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/smile.gif

Love,
Arturosgal