Hi. This is my first time to post on a public message board of ant sort. I am very private about health stuff and typically very calm about things. BUT, I am really freaked out and I would deeply appreciated any feedback or opinions from someone who has knowledge or experience with this sort of thing. I think I'm wasting a whole lot of mental energy on something that hopfully is nothing.

About 4 months ago I felt a lump on my throat about 1 centemeter , firm, rubbery (not rock hard) and easily moveable. It didn't hurt or feel at all tender. I've of course had swollen lymph nodes before, but never when I wasn't been sick and none that had this sort of consistancy. Anyway, I pretty much forgot about it for a few months.

Recently, it has gotten a little larger. It is still non-tender and feels like a rubbery marble. I also noticed, a couple of weeks ago, several lymph nodes in my groin with the same texture. A couple are about a centemeter big and rubbery and a few are very small and hard, like b.b. gun pellets. All of them move around easily and feel like they are in a chain. I have never in my life felt lymph nodes in my groin area... it's possible that I've just never noticed them. I asked a friend if she has lumps in her groin and she reassured my that it was normal, that a lot of people have them. I just think I would have noticed them at somepoint in my life prior to recently. (I am 29 years old)

Anyway, this week I went to my doctor for my annual physical and mentioned the lump in my neck. My dr. felt it and said it was a lymph node and that he didn't like the way it felt. He said I should go to an ear, nose and throat dr. to have it looked at. I didn't mention my groin lumps to him because I forgot. (at this point I wasn't in a panick like I am now)

Every since the appointment I have been totally freaked out and panicked. I know it is irrational and a complete waste of energy. I have an ENT appointment in 5 days.

Sorry for this being so longwinded!! I didn't intend to write a novel here... guess I just need to vent. phewww. exhale.

thanks.

ps: I am not a hypochondriac, i swear.

I've been there. I've done that. I understand. My best suggestion is to call that doctor back, the original one you saw and tell him you have lymph nodes in the groin area too that can be felt. Maybe you can bypass the ENT appointment.

Thanks for the quick reply. That's a really good idea.

Just an update... I went to the ENT today. He felt the lymph nodes in my neck and groin (both sides) and found some other ones that I hadn't noticed behind my ears. He put me on antibiotics, to rule out infection, and I had blood drawn to test for cat scratch fever and toxoplasmosis (I have 2 cats) as well as some other things. I'm having a CT scan next Monday and will have a biopsy if my nodes don't shrink with the antibiotics.

I am very nervous. I guess I'm lucky that this dr. seems to know what he's looking at, since it sound like some people on this board have very lazy drs.

Just an update... I went to the ENT today. He felt the lymph nodes in my neck and groin (both sides) and found some other ones that I hadn't noticed behind my ears. He put me on antibiotics, to rule out infection, and I had blood drawn to test for cat scratch fever and toxoplasmosis (I have 2 cats) as well as some other things. I'm having a CT scan next Monday and will have a biopsy if my nodes don't shrink with the antibiotics.

I am very nervous. I guess I'm lucky that this dr. seems to know what he's looking at, since it sound like some people on this board have very lazy drs.


I'm glad to hear you've got the wheels in motion. I've just been through something very much like you, except my case involes a lump on my upper lip and a swollen lymph node. I to was sent to a ENT Dr and he did a great job with me. Stay calm and don't stress out. wait for the result of all your test. No sence in getting all worked up over it.

Thanks for the reassuring words. I'm on my 4th day of antibiotics to see if it shrinks them, and therefore I'd know it's just an infection. So far no shrinkage, but it's only been 4 days.

Part of me feels sure that nothing is wrong and part of me has a very bad feeling about all of this.

Obviously there's no point in stressing myself out, but it's just difficult not knowing.

I feel a bit silly repeatedly replying to my own messages, but whatever. I finished all of my antibiotics, and the lumps are all still there... and proliferating. I feel another small one next to the larger one on my neck and the ones in my groin are getting bigger. None are larger than 2cm though. All of my blood tests, for mono, cat scratch fever, S.T.Ds, etc, etc, etc, came back negative too. My dr. hasn't contacted me about the CT scans which I had earlier this week, so I figure they couldn't look too grim. I've made an appointment for next week though, to find out what the story is.

For some reason I'm feeling way less nervous, but I just want to know what's going on. Could this be a viral thing, and that's why the antibiotics haven't helped?? If the dr. tells me he doesn't know what it is, should I say I want a biopsy? should I insist? I do have insurance afterall, so it's not a pocketbook issue.

If anyone has experience with this sort of scenario I would love to hear any advice, feedback, or whatever.

thanks again

The only way to be absolutely sure is to have a biopsy. I had no choice. The doctor ordered it immediately, before CT scans or anything else. All of my bloodwork was always perfect. I always thought the blood would show if anything was wrong....I was very wrong.

Hi again debbiefix & thanks for the reply.

jeez, i'm reading over all my posts and just can't believe how obsessive i'm being. I'm usually so good at just taking things as they come, ya know? when I went to the ENT a couple of weeks ago and he said he was concerned about lymphoma I just cried and cried for almost 2 days straight! what the hell?! I don't even know anything! no offense to anyone else, but in reading posts on this board is seems like there are way more people who are convinced they have cancer and don't than people who actually do have cancer. No judgment on anyone, I'm just wondering which category I'm falling into at the moment.

I've read a bunch of your posts (debbiefix) and they've made me feel much better... i have some faith that whatever happens I'll be okay. sorry for being corny and dramatic. I'm going to the dr. tomorrow for the 1st time since all of my tests, so I'll just see where it goes from there. I do trust him.

blah blah blah

You're not being corny and dramatic. All of us who were in your shoes felt the same way and did the same things. The bad thing is when you feel like there's a problem, but do nothing to resolve it. You probably read my posts back when I started all this, about a year ago. It all started with a mammogram which found enlarged lymph nodes under my arms. That was May 10th. I was a nutcase for a long time waiting for blood work results, PCP appointments, surgeon appointment, biopsy, then the oncologist. I went from May 10th til June 14th til I found out I have lymphoma, but not knowing what kind, til June 21st. It all fell into place when I found out that lymph nodes that I noticed were enlarged had been cancerous for a long time......at least 20 years. I found out it was a low grade form. I've had monoclonal immunotherapy (Rituxin)with no side affects (no fatigue, no nausea, no hair loss) and I still feel great, even better than I did before my diagnosis. I hope this can last. My form of Non Hodgkins Lymphoma (indolent/follicular, CLL-chronic lymphocytic leukemia) can not be cured. I can be put into remission for awhile, but sometime, chances are it will come back. For now that's ok. I'm living my life. People have worse things.
I do hope you move forward quickly and get some answers. Even if you do have lymphoma, I personally think that's not as bad as not knowing and wondering and driving yourself crazy with the what ifs. Hand in there. You can do it. I did. I know it's not easy.

Hi again,

Debbiefix, how great that you're feeling so good. I really hope it remains that way for you. And you are so right, way scarier things could happen. My 55 year old mother has been smoking 2 packs a day for 30+ years, and that, to me, is a way more frightening scenario in the making.

My dr. is going to do a biopsy, but 1st he ordered a contrast scan of my chest to see if there are any other enlarged lymph nodes there. He said he couldn't biopsy the nodes in my groin because they are all too close to major arteries, so he will probably do the one on my neck unless others show on the scan. He did a CBC today which showed anemia-- everything else is normal.

So, it's just MORE waiting for now. I won't have the CT scan for at least another week and then I'm sure it will be more waiting before I get a biopsy. Fortunately (I guess), I'm pretty busy with work at the moment so I don't have too much time to sit around and THINK.

Thanks again.

You're doing good. The hardest part of this whole thing is learning patience. We have to wait for doctors appointments, wait for tests, wait for results, possibly wait for treatment or medication, then wait for results, then wait again to see the doctor to see how things are doing. It's not easy, but we just have to do it.
I had my biopsy of a lymph node in the groin. I'm wondering why your doctor said he couldn't do that? I was under anesthesia but the whole thing took about 15 minutes, and that's with the results given to the surgeon too.

Debbiefix, Sotweed and all the others on here, I can feel your anxiety, my dad was diagnosed almost 2 years ago with Non-hodgkins Mantle Cell Lymphoma. He felt a lump behind his ear and it didn't hurt, but my mom wanted to have it checked out, so they did blood tests and once they came back ok, they sent him for a biopsy immediately, and that is when it was discovered that he had lymphoma. After seeing some top specialists, he decided that he needed to go to Houston Texas to be treated, they did the Rituxen and some new drugs that made him ill, but after a year in houston, he is home now and a year later is still in remission. Its been a long road for him and my mom and of course the rest of the family. IF at ever you have a lump and it doesn't hurt, PLEASE PLEASE get it checked out and request a biopsy, its much safer for you in the long run. This has been a journey that is very complex and very scary at times...He is my step father, but his daughter also has a rare form of Carcinoma and has lived with cancer for almost 6 years, she is dying slowly everyday, but keeps working and doing the best she can, she isn't ready to die yet and sometimes I wonder how she is still standing, she also has Lupus and various other problems to compound the cancer...I them and you all high praise to deal with this and try and live a normal life as much as possible that is. I will say a prayer tonight for all of you who are dealing with this, and I will pray that your journey is as mild as possible. :angel: