Hi,
I am new to this place. I am 30 and suffer from depression nearly all my life. It runs in my family. My husband is sick. He is 33 and has Congestive heart failure. He has had 2 open heart surgeries. The last one was 2 years ago. It was a problem he was born with. I go through life everyday wandering when God will take him away from me. We have a great marriage, eventhough 2 years ago, we lost everything, house, car...bankruptsy....but we still have eachother after 11 years.
I am a orthopedic nurse and I love my job, but do u ever have people ask you why you dont smile enough. I get so tired of hearing that. :rolleyes: I take great care of my paitents and they seem well pleased. But my coworkers are
always asking "r u OK? WHAY DO U NOT SMILE?" It makes me feel even more depressed.I take Lexapro 20mg and Wellbutrin 150mg. I just needed someone to talk to. How can you smile all the time? What do u do? Thanks..... :)

Ohmygoodness!! That's a lot of emotional stress and anxiety to be dealing with for an extended period of time at quite a young age--very young to be dealing with heart failure. I can only imagine going through every day unsure if my dh would be around with me that day, that night.

It sounds like you take care of everyone else--your dh, your patients, and so on. But you didn't really say how you are feeling. Well, annoyed at having people asking why you aren't smiling, but how are YOU feeling? You've been through so much, and there's no relief in sight. Have you tried a counselor at all? Getting some of this off your chest to someone face to face (as well as here) may take some of the load off your mind, may help lift a bit of the depression. HAve you ever been on meds for depression?

The people here are understanding and supportive. Post whenever you get a chance.

I'm sorry you're going through so much. It would be hard for anyone to handle all those things. I have experienced people saying things to me, like what is said to you. In WalMart a man passed me in the sporting dept. and said, "it can't be that bad. Smile." I have also gotten, put a smile on that face and you will be happier. You look like you've just lost your last friend. My all time favorite is...just don't think of anything depressing and you'll be fine. Geeez.

I'm used to that now, but there was a time when I tried smiling all day. I didn't feel any better, but the muscles in my face sure hurt that night.

I know these people are trying to help. They have no clue what we are going through. You have so much on your mind. Maybe you need a little time for yourself. I know that's hard to do. You mean a lot to your family. I hope your meds start working and you feel better soon. Take Care.....Connie :wave:

Hey Newbie,

no one can smile all the time love, thats how Motorcyclists get flys stuck in their teeth :jester:
Really though, it sounds to me like you and your partner need time to relax together and enjoy each others company without worrying about the negative side of his condition.
Sometimes you have to just stop, turn around, and say, "this is my life, this is our life, let us enjoy it right NOW"
You sound like a beautiful soul Newbie, always here if you need to chat, you are so not alone, ok? :)

Thank you all for the wonderful responses. It means so much to know I am not alone. I am trying to take 1 day at a time. It is embarassing to say,but I dont have many friends. My husband has been my best friend.
My husband is starting to see someone for his depression next week. He is taking 150mg Zoloft daily.....
We r going home(to his family) for a week in April . I think It will be good for both of us. Hope everyone has a great day :bouncing: