ever since i had my daughter one month ago, i have been so sad. i've suffered from depression for 4 years now and have been on prozac 20mg for 2yrs. it's no longer helping. i'm so scared. my life is falling apart. i have awful dreams of dying- that is if i can even get to sleep. all day long i mope around the house and think about ways to kill myself. my shrink can't get me in until over a month from now. my prescription has run out and i feel like i'm going crazy. i'm also going thru legal troubles due to a stupid ex husband who doesn't pay his bills which is piling on more stress. my fiance is pissed cuz i don't want to be touched sexually. i have no interest what so ever. i feel fat and ugly therefore i don't eat except for one meal a day. i don't want to leave the house. i won't even pick up the phone anymore. i'm scared to know who will be on the other end. another bill collector? my mom? my ex? i keep hoping someone will just put me out of my misery. then i feel selfish cuz i love my children and fiance. can anyone relate? i just need to know i am not the only one that feels like this...

Hang in there,

Thigs seem overwhelming sometimes and that's because they really are for most people anyway. Convince yourself that there is better that will come your way. Stay focus enough to keep the things that matter afloat until you come out of it and have a better day. Finances, housework just make sure they are not in the hazardous stage you can then find temp solutions that will make sense and become better long term solutions. But for now at your delicate state I would just use your energy to get out and soak as much light out there, it really works and then have your kids in mind, have them around share a smile and let them talk even if you're too spaced out to follow, they rather have that much. When the clouds move out of the way it reveals a beautiful bright sky it always is there knowing that we'll be there to smile back up at it. Look towards better days. Write out a plan that you know would work and then follow it. You'll pull yoursel out and get out of the blues.

I almost forgot, you don't need to see your shrink to get a refill of meds. If it's an emergency you can go to the ER and get some to hold you till your appt. If the meds were helping you it would be best to have no interruptions in the routine that you take them. I wish you luck and hope a sunny ray reaches down and touches you soon.