I'm just curious here. :confused:

I'm in college right now. As a younger kid, I wasn't treated very well by my peers. At that time, it was partially my fault because I didn't know how to act. Nowadays, I act normal and it still seems like people aren't treating me as well as they should. I consider myself very mature. I'm a very good student, work very hard, and try to be the best I can be in college.

I used to have friendships in middle school and high school, but people continued to stab me in the back throughout my school career. Now, as a college student, I have no desire whatsoever to establish relationships with peers or date. I also try to avoid events that involve my peers (such as concerts, parties, etc.). It seems like the more bad luck (not being treated well or getting betrayed) I have with my peers, the more I want to avoid them altogether. When I do find someone who I could potentially make that connection with, I always decide not to. Making friends and keeping them is something I've struggled with all my life. I just can't seem to get over the hump with friendships. Friendships/relationships must be one of my weakest points as a person. I can interact with my peers well on a daily basis (male or female), but it just seems like I can’t take the next step and make the friendship connection with them. Whenever I get involved with them (i.e. friendships), that’s when the wheels fall off. I can’t seem to keep the friendship going. I feel like it’s just not going to work no matter what I do. .

However, whenever I find peers that are at my maturity level, have the same interests, and same values, I feel I have a much better chance with connecting to them. However, there is no guarantee that I will. More times than not, I don’t bother.

I used to be a people person, but as time went on, and as I grew older and wiser, I decided to not be a people person. I feel that that social style would best suite me as a person.


1. Is there anything wrong with me (psychologically)?
2. Does anyone else know of anyone similar to this?
3. Is it normal to not be a people person, walk around campus alone, and interact with very few people I meet (in school only), and not take the relationship to a higher level?

Like I said, I have no desire to make friends or date.

you might have developed Schizoid Personality Disorder as a result of the trouble you've had with social relationships, The fact that you don't have any desire to have friendships or to date might suggest schizoid personality disorder. But in my opinion, it;s not really important to label you with any such thing if you are not bothered by your "symptoms" and are able to function well.

Anyhow, Here is the diagnostic criteria for schizoid Personality disorder:

schizoid personality disorder:
A pervasive pattern of detachment from social relationships and a restricted range of expression of emotions in interpersonal settings, beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts, as indicated by four (or more) of the following:

neither desires nor enjoys close relationships, including being part of a family

almost always chooses solitary activities

has little, if any, interest in having sexual experiences with another person

takes pleasure in few, if any, activities

lacks close friends or confidants other than first-degree relatives

appears indifferent to the praise or criticism of others

shows emotional coldness, detachment, or flattened affectivity


Does not occur exclusively during the course of Schizophrenia, a Mood Disorder With Psychotic Features, another Psychotic Disorder, or a Pervasive Developmental Disorder and is not due to the direct physiological effects of a general medical condition.

Note: If criteria are met prior to the onset of Schizophrenia, add "Premorbid," e.g., "Schizoid Personality Disorder (Premorbid)."

Thanks for the advice. I can honestly say that I fit into a lot of these.

You pretty much described me with most of those descriptions.

I tend to seek out people who are just like me. (E.g., I tend to become very close with others who are outcasts and have NO friends in school.) I've been like that pretty much all my life.

It seems like I have a friend, they have other friends, and I lose interest. I don't fair well in big groups, especially when I don't know people.

Hi. I'm not surprised you are feeling the way you are, after reading about the way your 'so called' school friends treated you. People like that are just *******s. I have battled the same problem all my life, I am 25 now. Throughout school and college I was made to feel an outsider, I was degraded. This has made me very wary of people. I am finally feeling that I am getting respect in my work place, although outside of work I like to spend time alone, not through choice but through my low self esteem. I avoid planning days out etc but if someone invites me I will tag along. I am petrified of bars and clubs, because I am virtually tea-total and I feel that my peers will expect me to drink and drink. I too don't like big groups I like to be in a one to one enviroment.

Hi. I'm not surprised you are feeling the way you are, after reading about the way your 'so called' school friends treated you. People like that are just *******s. I have battled the same problem all my life, I am 25 now. Throughout school and college I was made to feel an outsider, I was degraded. This has made me very wary of people. I am finally feeling that I am getting respect in my work place, although outside of work I like to spend time alone, not through choice but through my low self esteem. I avoid planning days out etc but if someone invites me I will tag along. I am petrified of bars and clubs, because I am virtually tea-total and I feel that my peers will expect me to drink and drink. I too don't like big groups I like to be in a one to one enviroment.

I totally hear where you're coming from on that one. ;)

I can get along well with my peers, yet I don't want to make the connection outside the colleague relationship for the same reasons you said.

I am a person who takes pride in individuality. ;)

I prefer to do solitary acitivies most of the time.

Thanks for relating to me. :)

I'm a college student with Asperger's, so I know all about what it's like to hate being around one's peers and not having anyone their own age to connect to, interest-wise. If you have any questions or just want to talk, I'm here! God bless! (Oh, does the "DP" in your user name stand for "Danny Phantom" by any chance? One of my obsessive fixations... ;) ) :angel:
-GatsbyLuvr1920-

I'm a college student with Asperger's, so I know all about what it's like to hate being around one's peers and not having anyone their own age to connect to, interest-wise. If you have any questions or just want to talk, I'm here! God bless! (Oh, does the "DP" in your user name stand for "Danny Phantom" by any chance? One of my obsessive fixations... ;) ) :angel:
-Danny'sGrl-

No. The first two letters in my username stands for my basketball team.

Does it sound like I have asperger's syndrome? This diagnosis stuff is confusing.

My social desire is non-existent, regardless of my mood (good or bad).

I'm on my laptop, it's a beautiful day, and I feel like I don't want to do anything with anyone. I Just sit on my computer all day, maybe go outside and walk around.

Well, that depends. I really can't say if it's Asperger's because you haven't shown any other symptoms besides lack of social connections. Do you have obsessive fixations/preoccupations with objects or areas of learning? Like, do you memorize everything there is to know about the weather or a certain singer or the immune system or something? Do you have some obsessive-compulsive traits (I also have severe, full-blown OCD), namely needing to repeat things in the same order? Do you feel uncomfortable with change or having your routine screwed up? Do you have sensory issues, such as being picky about food textures, unable to stand certain types of clothing, hate being wet, etc? Have you always felt "different" from you peers because of your quirks, unable to connect with them because you've always been more mature and intelligent? Would you rather stay home and read a textbook than go to the mall with friends? All of these indicate Asperger's, along with several symptoms that I don't personally have, such as lack of empathy/unable to care about people's problems, and an inability to interpret body language and sarcasm. Most importantly, are you happy being by yourself in your room all day? Do you not want to do anything with anyone because you just don't have the energy or you're lacking interest, or is it your own personal choice? If you could connect with someone and felt like doing something social, would you jump at the chance or would you rather keep being by yourself because you're annoyed by people? The first would be depression, the second more indicative of Asperger's. Write back if you have any more questions! :angel:
-GatsbyLuvr1920-

Do you have obsessive fixations/preoccupations with objects or areas of learning?
Sometimes

Like, do you memorize everything there is to know about the weather or a certain singer or the immune system or something?
Not really.

Do you have some obsessive-compulsive traits (I also have severe, full-blown OCD), namely needing to repeat things in the same order?

No

Do you feel uncomfortable with change or having your routine screwed up?

Yes.

Do you have sensory issues, such as being picky about food textures, unable to stand certain types of clothing, hate being wet, etc?

Sometimes. I hate being wet, but I love the water and love to swim. There are some clothes I really do hate.

Have you always felt "different" from you peers because of your quirks, unable to connect with them because you've always been more mature and intelligent?

Yes. Maturity big part of it.

Would you rather stay home and read a textbook than go to the mall with friends?

It depends on what friends. More times than not, I would prefer to be studying/playing on my computer than going out in the world and interacting with my peers.

All of these indicate Asperger's, along with several symptoms that I don't personally have, such as lack of empathy/unable to care about people's problems, and an inability to interpret body language and sarcasm. Most importantly, are you happy being by yourself in your room all day?

I love being by myself in my room. I do have empathy for people until they hurt me or do somthing terrible, then I hate them and absolutely can't stand them. :mad:

Do you not want to do anything with anyone because you just don't have the energy or you're lacking interest, or is it your own personal choice?

It's usually a combination of three of these.

Thank you

Believe me. I function normal, I do very well in school, I interact well with adults and younger children, and I interact well with my family. The trouble lies mostly within my age group. It always has. Outside my agegroup, I'm great.

Personally, I think I have some kind of social disorder.

Yeah, I agree. It doesn't really sound like Asperger's since you get along well with adults and children. I, personally, hate being around children. Torture for me... As for adults, I have always connected much better with them, but still, there's only certain people I do connect with and like to be around, and even then, sometimes I'd prefer to be by myself. Yesterday, I left my room to go eat dinner and go to the bathroom- that was it. It was lovely... Anyway, if you don't have the obsessiveness, I highly doubt it's Asperger's because that's such a defining characteristic of it. Your problems probably stem from your intelligence and maturity. If you ever want to talk, let me know! :angel:
-GatsbyLuvr1920-

Yeah, I agree. It doesn't really sound like Asperger's since you get along well with adults and children. I, personally, hate being around children. Torture for me... As for adults, I have always connected much better with them, but still, there's only certain people I do connect with and like to be around, and even then, sometimes I'd prefer to be by myself. Yesterday, I left my room to go eat dinner and go to the bathroom- that was it. It was lovely... Anyway, if you don't have the obsessiveness, I highly doubt it's Asperger's because that's such a defining characteristic of it. Your problems probably stem from your intelligence and maturity. If you ever want to talk, let me know! :angel:
-GatsbyLuvr1920-

I don't know if this is considered obsessive, but I usually have a one track mind. I wake up with one thought and I think about it for most of the day. (E.g., I'll wake up thinking about a certain athlete, and I'll think of them all day; I'll wake up thinking about a song and I'll think about it the whole day). I can get pretty obsessive. Another example would be when my team loses, I think about it the whole day/until they win the next game. I'm always living in my own world. :yawn:

Also, I used to wear the same clothes on the same days. I don't do that now though. To come to think of it, I can remember my parents telling me that I'm "stuck in a rut," and that "I don't want to be the type of guy that goes to work and back every day."

Just to make it clear... I prefer not to be around people, but when it comes down to it, I get along better with adults (much better) and children/younger. Otherwise, I'd rather be doing my own thing. All-in-all, there's certain people I can connect with a lot better (just like you said). I don't necessarily always connect with adults and children better. Basically, it doesn't matter what age they are, what matters is how I gel with them. In general/on average, I connect better with people older or younger, but that's not always the case. This is no coincidence as the maturity level for my age group is horrendous these days. It depends on how I gel with that given person that allows me to have a relationship. For example, if I found a guy my age or girl my age that was a lot like me, that increases the chances of me connecting with them and becoming friends. Basically, I function better and can get along better with others who possess the maturity at a higher level.

I always say to myself, "I'm sick of the silly-kid ****," and I don't make any effort to talk to anyone at school. When I do talk to people, it just takes a long time to make that connection; even then, it falls through more times than not.

An example of me not wanting to be around people is when my cousin has a (clean) party/get-together with her friends when she returns from Italy. I quickly lose interest and go back to my grandma's house (she lives two doors down; I don't live with my grandma).

I don't think I answered those questions from the previous post that well. Just wanted to clear those up. :)

I think I have something called Avoidant Personality Disorder. :confused:

It's hard to say what my problem(s) is/are. All I know is that I'm successful in every aspect of my life except my social life (= non-existent) (which is nothing new to me).

Thanks

Ah, now we're getting somewhere- you do sound like an obsessive person. You obviously don't have full-blown OCD like I do, but you do have some mild obsessive traits. Your most recent description does sound like me in terms of the social interactions, and it is possible that you may have a mild case of Asperger's. I have a mild case, and if you do have it at all, you'd probably have a milder case than me because you lack the clear-cut obsessiveness and fixations, but you do indeed show some of the traits. I don't think you have avoidant personality disorder; this usually involves fear of wanting to be around people because you're afraid that you'll be rejected. Write back soon! :angel:
-GatsbyLuvr1920-

Ah, now we're getting somewhere- you do sound like an obsessive person. You obviously don't have full-blown OCD like I do, but you do have some mild obsessive traits. Your most recent description does sound like me in terms of the social interactions, and it is possible that you may have a mild case of Asperger's. I have a mild case, and if you do have it at all, you'd probably have a milder case than me because you lack the clear-cut obsessiveness and fixations, but you do indeed show some of the traits. I don't think you have avoidant personality disorder; this usually involves fear of wanting to be around people because you're afraid that you'll be rejected. Write back soon! :angel:
-GatsbyLuvr1920-

I have another question. Does Asperger's syndrome involve problems at work? I've had trouble sticking at one workplace. I've done well with sticking at one place recently. I work at a park and love the job. I'm very social at work with just about everyone.

These questions seem to never end from me.

Thank you for your patience. :)