Dakota32
05-25-2006, 12:37 AM
I think the initial shock of what has been happening over the past six weeks is starting to fade into something a bit more logical. I have been stressed at work and at home and my health is starting to suffer for it which is part of life. So I did something I never do and I made a doctors apt. I haven't kept much down since this happened and I am not sleeping much so I am asking for help because I need to be in a good state of mind and I am starting to waiver in that dept. I may even go talk to someone about bipolar disorder so that I can better understand what my sweety is going through. If anyone can recommend some good books that would be great. I just want to be pro active. This is a great website. The reply to my first posting brought tears to my eyes. I have moments when this seems like to much. When the though of another manic episode makes me sick to my stomach and worry about the future. But I have decided I will cross that bridge when I get to it. I will power through because I love him with all my heart and if the tables were turned he would not leave my side either. That I know in my heart is true. I have to take care of myself so I can have his back when needed. I am having a hopeful moment right now. We are starting to talk about it slowly but surely and I know this will take time and I need to learn the meaning of patience. When ever I am upset he looks at me like it is his fault and feels guilty. I don't want him to have to worry about me right now so I am taking care of me first real quick so I can be there for him. Any ideas on how to face my best friend/significant other bp illness head on and get going in the right direction, please let me know. I am going into battle armed with nothing but love and I'd feel better if I had something to go with that ;)

