Ok, our psychologist made the diagnosis of Aspergers. Now, had she told me he didn't have it or told he had something else, I would thought she was a liar. That is how convinced I was that my son has Aspergers. Ok, so now can someone tell me why I am doubting it now? Now, all of a sudden I am wondering if she had the time to "really" know if he had (spent 2 hours with him, we and teacher did questionaires), if she was the right person to give the diagnosis (others have been diagnosed by Dev. Ped or a team of people). What if it was a jump to diagnosis because she knew what I thought? Should I take him to a Neurologist to have a full exam? What about a Dev. Ped?

Maybe the reality of it has actually hit me. I mean when I read about Aspergers, I feel like the books were wrote about my son. My mom, best friend and dh concur that it seems just like him. I mean I know he isn't like the other kids. Last time I was in his class (last week), I left and got in my car and cried because it was so obvious he is "different".

I dunno, maybe I am just a little nervous about all of this.

Oops, forgot to ask.....Ok, so now he has Aspergers and I know I need to get him some help with a few things, but most importantly, who is going to help me and dh? How do you parent a child with Aspergers? What do you do differently, knowing he can't help some of the things he does? What can we do to help him? Who can help US? I want to make sure we do this right and there are specialist all over the place for him, but I think we need to talk to someone too.

first of all, i was told once that getting a diagnosis can be sometimes like hearing a loved one has died... and that you go through the greiving process like they have... and if you think about it, it is like some one died. the idea you had about how your son would grow up to be when you pregnant and when he gave you his first little baby smile... that totally normal life that you thought was going to blossom before you like anything you have ever seen on any lifetime special is gone... and in its place you have thing totally unique, if painfully so at first, but in his own way wonderful boy instead...

so yes, i think that you are probably having some denile, even though you were sure of it to begin with... it still hurts and you want to pretend you didnt hear right... until reality takes hold and you know its time to move! and you sound like you are almost there.

secondly there are resources EVERYWHERE! for kids with these disabilities and their families... you juat may have to look a little... BUT! you made it here and you can learn alot from that. my first bit of advice is to get case manangement services... and if you live somewhere like maine, 0 to 5 year olds can get that for free through child developmental services... your physcologist should be able to suggest some that she has worked with before. case management will set up everything for you and find any services you think would help and suggest others you never even thought about. secondly finding a local offline support group for autism and related issues has been a god send for my husband and i. they have provided us with some good advice, better yet knowledge of services and laws we didnt know about, better still empowerment to be proud of our son and a better ability to advocate for him...and BEST of ALL a simpathetic ear that REALLY knows what it is like to be a parent!

anyhow will get some great advice but this is just mine:) G-Luck and yes there is help out there!

Hi JeepMom,

I look at a diagnosis as a "working hypothesis." Those of us with older kids know that none of this stuff is carved in stone. I've had more than one psychiatrist tell me, "if you put a kid in a room with a hundred psychiatrists, you'd likely end up with a hundred different diagnoses." :eek: So much for confidence in THAT profession!

Aspergers is a psychiatric diagnosis. Going to a neurologist won't change the psych dx unless there are neurological symptoms & findings that account for the observed behavior better than the Aspergers dx does. Certainly if your son has anything resembling any sort of seizure, has had head trauma, or birth injury, a neuro workup might be advised.

The most impt thing about getting a dx is that it paves the way for services & resources ... all those things you are asking questions about. Without a dx, special educational considerations aren't likely to happen.

About the parenting, take a deep breath. Your son is the same kid as he was before someone muttered this dx mumbojumbo. You are probably doing a great job right now of feeding, clothing, and loving him. Just keep on doing that, until you figure out the next step. Don't stress out ... relax, you're in this for the long haul.

There's been a lot written the last 10 yrs. on Aspergers. Try your public library for a book or two. Also, ck. around to see if there's an Asperger parent support group in your community.

Best wishes.