hi all ...

i will start by introducing myself. I'm a non-native 26-yo male speaker. I'm smoker, no known medical problems. Please remember that since we are in the net, i will talk as if i was talking to myself, i will talk freely.

I have a Bachelor degree in engineering (chemical/process). I work for the larget oil company in the world. I receive a very good monthly income, an income that any guy in my age would dream of in my country. My family is relatively rich, when my father passed away, he left us a very good amount of money, do i care? Nope.

My interests are reading engineering articles. I'm a very good learner. Nothing is new to me in this world, i usually turn anything new to "familiar" by learning. I read everything. I'm an excellent researcher. Discovery channel is my best friend, specially the Extreme Engineering show. I love animals too. I enjoy everything.

So, what's really my problem?

My big and major problem is that i'm a lazy careless guy. Period. The word LATER is a word i really appreciate. Everytning in my life is later. Shaving my head and face is later. Cleaning my car is later. My car is always a mess. Even taking showers is a "later" thing :eek:

I was NEVER interested in the way i look. As long as i'm enjoying life, good looking is the last thing i think of.

My firends are completely opposite. They really care about themselves, the way they look, their cars, etc.

Do i enjoy sex? not much, i don't care. It's OK for me if i don't have sex.
I do have relations with females, but was never interested with having sex with them, if it happens OK, if not, hell with it. I'm generally not interested in dating. And i do have some tendency to homosexual relations, but i don't care.

As long as i have my laptop, and an access to the internet, i'm happy.

Even my teeth don't look good. I never care.

Basically, i'm a mess. My mother, whom i love the most, always keeps saying that i'm a mess and i really need to change.

But as i told you i'm enjoying the way i live.

So, why am i complaining if i'm enjoying it?

I was sitting in a bar with a friend of mine, yes, we saw that beautiful girl. It was the FIRST time in my life to approach a girl the way i did. She is a prostitute, but i liked her. Time has passed, and i knew i would let her go, and i did. My friend took over the conversation. I backed off. I got upset, i don't know why. Maybe because of her.

But what makes care this time? That was a big question for me. I couldn't find answer. I was trying to find exceuses.

So, i started reviewing my life that night, and everything came up.

I don't know what happened, but i really want to change. I'm sure this feeling will last for 1 or 2 weeks until everything returns to normal, and then i will live as i did in the past.

But i don't want this to happen. I DO want to change.

But as i told you before, the world later is killing me.

How can i get over it?

Please help me, i would really appreciate any help. I want to live the way normal people live. I do want to care. This problem is affecting my performance in my work. Although i'm good at my work, tasks take long time to finish. Not because i don't understand them or something, just because i'm lazy to finish them.

Please help on how to get started.

Any ideas? any? Please

Sorry for the bad English.

Hi there,

I think that it is very comendable all that you have accomplished. It sounds like you are very accomplished and that is great. I just wanted to say good luck to you with everything. Only a couple of peices of advice. Start slow...if you try to chage everything at once than it may become too overwhelming to continue. Small changes everyday, like maybe taking a shower everyday :) , will help you see a change. Once you start noticing a difference in how you feel and how people treat you, you will be excited to make more changes. Also, you said that you have a great job and make good money, so why your motivited right now go get some stuff taken care. Go buy some new clothes and if you don't like your teeth, call the dentist. Some times making changes to the outer you can lead to changes in the inner you.

Good luck again...
Bree

I sounds to me that you are depressed. Depression takes many faces and putting everything off until later can be one sign. I don't think your lazy at all I think there is something you are not able to face that has happened to you. You would not have acheived achedemicly all you have if you were lazy.
(sorry if some things are misspelled, one thing I am a bit as you say lazy about)
You really should seek out medical advice. Questions you might ask yourself is when did this really start? Was it before or after your father passed away? Did something tramtic happen to trigger all this if it was not the passing of your father? Where you molested?

Those are things you should talk to a therapist about. I am no expert all I know is what has happened in my life. Some times we lie to ourselves and say we just don't care but its just a way to block a more painful subject we don't want to face.

Good luck