I was just diagnosed with Cyclothymia. I am confused now, I was checked for heart problems here at the clinic and was reffered to the psychiatrist. This diagnosis came out of nowhere. I discussed this with my husband, and he thinks I don't need medication. I have struggled with my short attention span and lately my memory is going. I have a hard time getting myself to do things, sometimes event he ones I enjoy. I adpated to where I could function, and made myself do things that I knew had to be done. It is so hard for me to get out of bed most of the time, and feel blah, and always tired, even when I have not done anything. I take advantage of my "up" days and clean our living area and catch up on writing letters, but lately I haven't had many "up" days. I am confused and still don't know if I need medication. I was prescribed Lexapro, and have been taking it for 3 days. I felt awful the first 2 days, I felt tense and light headed, dizzy, and I could not think straight. Now I'm a bit better, just really tired. Does it get better with time and meds?

hi strawberry :wave:
i can relate to a lot of what you're saying, ive just been diagnosed bipolar and often doubted if there was anything wrong with me or if i needed to be on meds. The problem with a mental illness is that it cant be "seen" as easily as a physical illness or tested for in the same way to give a definite "yes" or "no" so its more about trial and error as far as diagnosis and medication goes, and often based on what you tell your doctor/physicatarist yourself. Ive just started taking lithium on monday and for the past few days i felt really grotty, ive had no motivation to do anything, very bad short term memory and no appetite. it does get confusing as you start to wonder what's caused the illness and what's caused by the medication. but today is the first day ive felt better and im sure all this was just my body adjusting to the meds. the best advice i can give you is to stick at the meds and see how you feel. If you're confused about your diagnosis, how well the meds work for you and if you notice any improvement should tell you whether or not you need to be treated.And if the meds arent agreeing with you, there are others you can try. just hang in there and things will hopefully become clearer. Good luck, fallen :angel:

Thanks, I guess I feel this way because I was married to someone who was so sick, he had major depression, but had alsom ood swings, and was on so many meds, that what I have seems nothing. I have been able to manage, and didn't think I was sick, I figured maybe my metabloism was slow or I needed vitamins. I have since divorced and remarried. I am very happy with me husband now, but my mood swings have been more pronounced lately. He said it's this place (I'm in Iraq), he is very loving, and has helped my moods, since he is so fun and playfull sometimes. That picks me up a lot when I'm down. But even when we were home, I did not get really depressed, just a bit blah, and sometimes sad, but always tired. We just figured it was PMS. Then, sometimes I have energy spurts, as soon as I get one, I put it to use and catch up on all the stuff I left for later. I started writing a biography in a question and answer form on the internet, and that has helped me a lot. It's like looking in the mirror. I did this because my memory seems to go sometimes, I was afraid to forget things, so I started writing them down. I try to cope, but I would love to have more "up" times. So hopefully the medication will work. My head feels heavy now, but the dissyness is gone. I didn't even ask for this, the Army sent me to the doctor for something else completely. It was sure a surprise. It ios a releif to find out I'm not lazy and forgetfull after all. I found ways to get things done, I can't sit still for long, my attention span is next to nothing, so I eat candy when I have to sit in a classroom to get myself to stay put. And I am learning to use my energy spurts for creativity, I am trying to write a book on my "up" times. Hope it works out. At least now I know it's not my fault.

Hi Strawberry, and welcome to the boards.
You have every right to feel confused. You've been diagnosed with the the mildest form of bipolar disorder, and yet you know first hand that it's caused problems in your life.

I am Type I Bipolar - the most severe form - and I've been on Lithium for almost 21 years now. It has worked great for me and I live a really normal life for the most part. Once I was on lithium I found a stable wonderful relationship, have been married for 17 years, and have worked for 30 years with only one break of 2 years.

On the other hand, my next oldest sister is "only" cyclothymic - not severe enough for her to face it, or do anything about it. And she does get by. She even has a masters degree.
However, she's been married and divorced twice, lives with someone that we in the family lovingly call "the jerk", had had numerous job changes and many moves from the north to the south and back again. She is difficult to talk to because she will fly off the handle if you say something she disagrees with. Everything must be a "party".
She is exhausting!!

So, on the surface I as a Type I Bipolar on meds am "healthier" than my cyclothymic sister who isn't.

And, everyone is different so take this as just my own corner of knowledge!!
:angel:

Thank you, this is just hard to understand. I saw what my exhusband was like, he was very ill and was on a lot of medication. he had major depression. compared to what we went through with him, this is nothing. I remarried now and am very happy with my life, except sometimes emotionally, I feel sort of blah. But I keep in mind what I already knew before I felt low. So if I already know I am very happy with him, so if I feel numb, I just keep it in mind. It also helps that my husband is so sweet. We are in Iraq, and live in a room, so he has given me several cards just because, they all say he loves me, so I posted them on my side of the room on the wall. I look at them oftne when I feel low. He also sees that I am low, and gives me candy and makes me laugh. He just doesn't believe I need medication, we used to attribute this to PMS. I never told him about my memory going and other things like that. I didn't want him to think I was getting lazy and stupid, but that's how I felt, so my self esteem sometimes goes. Then all of a sudden I feel better, get myself together and set goals so I can get back on track. My husband keeps telling me it's just this place that depresses people, and the long hours that tire me. But I don't think that's it. I have been like this for a long time. I am now 36, and I remember when I was 18 and I was taken to the doctor to test for whatever was making me tired and/or sleepy all the time. I also get very fidgety, I can't stay still.
Well, gotta go for now.
Thanks

Thank you so much for your advice. It really helps to talk to people who have been through similar situations.

I went to my doctor's appointment on Wed. I was so tired, he said I did not look good. I told him the medication was making me so tired, and sleepy. He asked if I wanted to switch meds. I told him I wanted to stick with it for now, and see if I can adjust to it. I want to give it a chance. I have only been on them a week, so I think I should give it some time.

I don't know how long it is supposed to take for the medication to start working, so I am guessing I should give it 3 weeks.

It's just so hard to stay awake after a few hours of work. Then I feel great about 2 hours before bed time. I am actually sleeping better now though, I was having a hard time before.

The doctor told me to take one pill a day, in morning or night. I took it at night the ifrst day, it was very bad. Since I work nights, it was really hard to function. The side effects have since eased up a lot. I take my pill in the morning before I go to bed. :)