I'd like to here from parents of a teenage or older child with high functioning PDD-NOS or Autism, as I think all the time about what's to come for my son, and it scares the heck out of me. I would just like to know how your children are doing now? Are they happy? Has making friends gotten easier for them? Were they at least accepted to some extent in Junior High and High School? I'm sorry if this sounds like a little too much, but I worry alot.

pddmother- I'll be 19 in August, I'm an upcoming college sophomore, and I was just diagnosed with Asperger's this spring. I don't know if you'd like to talk to me, or just someone with PDD-NOS, but if you have any questions, feel free to ask! I'm always willing to talk! God bless! :angel:
-GatsbyLuvr1920-

I'm 41 years of age, and have four college and university degrees, work at the library, and I am interested in anything and everything. I still have work to do on social issues, but I have hope that I can smooth out my rough edges. I am much better now than I was in my childhood, teens, and even my 20s. Things began to take off for me in my late 20s, and I never looked back.

I live by Roger Bannister's credo that nothing is impossible if you have the intelligence and the heart. He proved that by becoming the first to break 4 minutes for the mile and accomplishing a great deal in his life. I suspect that RGB is an Aspie himself, a quite accomplished one.

Thank you both so much for taking the time to post a reply.

-GatsbyLuvr1920-
I do have a couple of questions for you. First and most important are you happy? Did you have trouble with other children wanting to be you friend in grade school, and if so did it get better? I am happy to hear things are going well for you. Good luck in college.

9CatMom
It warms my heart to see a sucess story like yours, gives me hope.

Thank you again, ;)
Robin

Hi, pddmother! I guess that I'm happy. I'm on the mood stabilizer Lamictal, which has greatly reduced my Asperger's mood swings and has made me much more calm. I was teased a lot in elementary school, up through sixth grade. I think it was because I was eccentric as well as independent, and I didn't care what anyone thought about the way I dressed or anything like that. In seventh grade, I was teased less. Even though my school had a lot of cliques in it, and I know that some people always did talk about me behind my back, I wasn't really teased or ostracized. I think this may be because my school had a lot of "smart" people, and since I was one, I got a lot of respect. Really, I think the high population of intellectuals is the reason that I had so many long-term friends, and when I say "many," I mean about six, which is the highest number of really close friends I ever have had at one time. I still keep in touch with them all, but we all were quirky in some way, although I was definitely the most idiosyncratic. I never did "typical teenage things" in high school, and I still don't. I'm the type of person who stays at home and reads her chemistry book on the weekends rather than go to a party filled with crowds of annoying people, noise, and all types of trouble that would send my OCD into hyperdrive. At college, there aren't nearly as many intellectuals as there were at my high school, which is ironic because it's the opposite of what one might expect. I really only have made three good friends up there. I still get greatly annoyed with normal people, the 90% of my peers that I'm forced to be around that are very superficial and don't care about learning, and many days I do feel misunderstood and helpless, but it's gotten better over the past few months now that I actually know why I feel this way. If you have any more questions, let me know! :angel:
-GatsbyLuvr1920-

GatsbyLuvr1920 : ( Don't mean to tread on ppdmother's thread )

You are simply amazing to have the knowledge and the ability to give such a complete sunmmery of the classifcation of Bipolar Disorder : Your Quote.....

"If you have mixed states, you are classified as bipolar I. There is bipolar III, IV, V, and VI. Bipolar III is bipolar disorder that is induced by the use of an organic substance such as an illegal drug or the use of an anti-depressant (very common). However, the term "bipolar III" is only used to describe how a person developed the condition, but they still will either have bipolar I (full-blown mania) or bipolar II (only hypomania) symptomatology. Bipolar IV is cyclothymia, a very mild form of bipolar disorder where the person is constantly switching from three day periods of mild depression (dysthymia) to hypomania. Bipolar V is unipolar depression in someone who has a large genetic history of bipolar disorder in his/her family. They are classified as bipolar V because they may become (hypo)manic later on, or they may become (hypo)manic while using an anti-depressant, which would then chance their diagnosis to bipolar III. Bipolar VI is unipolar mania. I personally have never heard of any cases of bipolar VI. I think that one would only be given a diagnosis of bipolar VI if their first major episode was one of full-blown mania, and they were put on Lithium or some other medication before they ever had a chance to become severely depressed."

I know you have stated in past posts that you are not Bipolar. You have OCD and Asperger's. Could you summerize Asperger's as to it's symptoms and how the mood swings may or may not be simular to the mood swings in Bipolor Disoeder. Aslo,is there a relationship to OCD ? If so do you know if OCD is a direct cause of Asperger's ? What are the major symptoms of OCD and is it aquired by a difficult childhood (as you had), or is their some genetic influence as with Bipolar disorder ?

Sorry to ask so many questions on OCD and Asperger's, however, I just wanted to take advantage of your offers at the end of ALL your posts when you always state "If you have any more questions, let me know!" :angel:

Maybe,sometime this summer "when you feel nerdy" and can "pull away from a Gasby book (or chemistry book), I would feel very honored to hear from a budding psyoneurological expert :) Your :cool:

Eyes

I'm always willing to talk with you, EYES, especially about OCD and Asperger's! :D First off, I just wanted to say that I was really flattered by your post; I feel honored to be considered knowledgeable... Anyway, Asperger's and OCD are two completely separate conditions, and though they do mimic each other symptom-wise at times, there's many differences. It is possible to have Asperger's and have obsessive-compulsive traits, have OCD and have Aspie traits, or, like me, have both OCD and Asperger's. If someone has OCD, it is physically impossible for them to develop Asperger's later in life- Asperger's is a neurological condition, and is present from very early on in life. However, someone with Asperger's may develop full-blown OCD later on, or they may simply just always have some OC traits. Neither one, though, are caused by rough childhoods. They can be worsened by environmental stress (for example, when the trouble with my father peaked in 1999 when I was 11, I began to have actual obsessions), but there's almost always a genetic basis to it. Okay, now for the actual symptoms. Asperger's, or "high-functioning autism" as it's often referred to, is characterized by social deficits/awkwardness, a drastic need for sameness and routine, a tendency to develop obsessive fixations (technically called "perseverations") about certain objects or topics (the most common are things like train schedules, weather, history, etc.), a tremendous capacity for rote memorization, especially about facts and figures regarding the perseverations, sensory issues, outbursts due to sensory overload and change, lack of delayed verbal abilities as in autism (many Asperger's kids are extremely advanced in the field of language, and usually learn to read early because they're hyperlexic), lack or reluctance to use eye contact, inability to understand nuances of social interaction, including body language, difficulty relating to peers, difficulty conversing with someone unless it's about a specific perseveration, and sometimes a monotonous voice and apathy towards family members (I don't have this, but I don't have as serious a case as they come, and the disorder is a spectrum, meaning that it affects everyone differently and to different measures). Many (as well as many with OCD) have some sort of nonverbal learning disorder, and have difficulty learning broad topics and doing visual-spatial skills; I'm one of them. For OCD, there are only two symptoms that need to be present, and it is said to be the easiest psychiatric disorder to diagnose: the person must have obsessions (thoughts, images, or ideas that consistently enter the mind over and over again, even though the person doesn't want to think the thought or see the image because they cause great disgust, anxiety, and doubt), and compulsions (actions, either mental or overtly performed, that are used to get rid of the fear that the obsession causes). Really, what defines OCD is FEAR, very intense fear. This is why it is the most severe of the anxiety disorders, and why it can be so debilitating. No matter whether someone is a pure obsessional (what I am), a washer, a checker, a counter, or a repeater, there's always two things in common with their obsessions: there's some form of doubt and some feeling of a loss of safety due to that doubt. The French actually dub OCD "the doubting disease" because the feeling of being unsure is so prevalent. For example, somebody may think, "What if someone sneezed on that food while they were making it? What if I touch it and get sick? What if I then touch someone else and make THEM sick?" So, they then wash over and over to make sure that they're not contaminated and don't make someone ill. Someone else may think, "What if I left the stove on? What if my house burns down? I'd better go back and check to make sure it's properly turned off.." Others take on a blasphemous, sexual, or violent nature (these are pure obsessions) such as, "I hate God," thinking that you see yourself molesting your newborn baby, or seeing yourself stabbing a loved one. These cause great fear, and the person develops mental compulsions, such as counting, praying for forgiveness, the "counterimage" (fixing a "bad" image to a "good" one, such as taking a knife out of someone after you see yourself stabbing them), and just plain avoidance of situations and objects that may trigger the obsessions, to rid themselves of the fear and feeling that they're a sinful person. All OCD comes down to the fear of hurting, killing, or upseting someone. This is why so many OCD-ers have what is called "hit-and-run" OCD where they think that they've hit someone every time they hit a bump while driving. (This is also why I haven't learned to drive yet...) Really the obsessive-compulsiveness seen in Asperger's takes the form of repetition and using repetition to calm oneself in a world of chaos, fear of the unknown, and confusion, but people with Asperger's who don't have real OCD don't have the true fear of hurting someone. (This is why I think that I'm very empathetic, even though I have Asperger's because my OCD eliminates some of the indifference.) The "obsessions" in Asperger's make the person feel GOOD, not fearful as in OCD. I read somewhere where one guy with both said that he had "good" obsessions from his Asperger's and "bad" obsessions from his OCD, and I couldn't explain it any better. I welcome obsessions about "I Love Lucy," Frank Sinatra, American history, biochemistry, and a slew of other things, but I'd never want to have obsessions regarding hurting people or blasphemy. Asperger's kids like to do things a certain way, at a certain time, so they'll know what to suspect, and there won't be any surprises. Any "new" situation causes fear to the Aspie because something might happen that we won't know how to handle. Even something as little as not being able to use the same sink in the bathroom because it's being occupied by someone else already may cause feelings of anxiety, or more likely, anger. This leads to the outbursts and mood swings... They're usually screaming fits or tantrums that the child cannot control, and they only last for a short while. I always feel as if this anger builds up inside of me because of frustration or being misunderstood, and it either erupts into yelling or tears. Yesterday, for example, my mother comes in to comb my hair, and I didn't want her to, but she just started yanking my hair with the comb, and I began yelling at her and pushing her. It's most likely because of the sensory issue. Without my Lamictal, I'm like a time bomb, and I never know when I'm going to be set off, and I'll have breakdowns and cry almost every single day at school because of all of the annoying sights and sounds of my peers and being around peers. I also have periods of what I consider to be mild hypomania where everything makes me feel so incredibly happy, and I'm filled with a bubbly, "feel-good," dancing feeling, usually when it's a gorgeous May afternoon or something. This is why I thought I had cyclothymia until I was diagnosed with Asperger's and read about other Aspie's outbursts and saw the similarity. My mom used to say that I could be absolutely miserable one minute and then giddy the next. It's usually sensory issues, though. Like the weather or hearing annoying people or something. Hope this helped, EYES! If you want to know more or if I didn't explain something very well, let me know! Neuropsychiatry is one of MY perseverations/obsessive fixations! That's why I know so much about it because I research endlessly! :angel:
-GatsbyLuvr1920-

Gatsby:

What can I say. Or maybe you would say, What can I say... again...

Your report says so much about Asperger's and OCD that I have a hard time trying to comprehend all of it. What seems to stick out, is your concept of OCD is FEAR. You put this together very well. And explain how fear is a major cause of OCD.

Perseveration is an amazing "word" as you use it. Just how it is connected to OCD is a very open "subject",although, I like your way of explaining the experience of it.

Thanks for the explaintion of the mood swings you experience as a person with Asperger's as it relates to the type of mood swings of a Bipolar I or Bipolar II. I can't help but "feel" that All or us In the "great field" of "mental arrearness" have the unique ability to "communiticate" at the same level ;)

Oh, one last thing for you to ponder. You brought up your problems of dealing with visual-spatial skills as it relates to OCD. Some of your obervations were very intersting and seemed to have some unique "insght". I say this because of my own professional background. I am a behavioral/perceptual Optometrist.

Maybe,your research,that you enjoy so much, is Really "closer to understanding our peers" (no matter what age), then what our mental abilities will let us to beleive. ;)

Eyes

Hey, Eyes! I like how you said that it's hard to comprehend it all. With me, it's sometimes hard to see where my OCD starts and my Asperger's ends. This is why CBT was a failure for me. For example, it isn't exactly clear why I have certain compulsions. Are they because of an OCD fear or an Asperger's-related thing where I need to have everything a certain way so there won't be any surprises? The biggest one for this confusion is running out of things. I'm always afraid of running out of toiletries and stuff, especially while I'm packing to go on vacation or go back to college or something, but is it a fear of the unknown stemming from the OCD or Asperger's? This is why my CBT therapist is sending me to an Asperger's therapist in the fall... ;)
-GatsbyLuvr1920-

Robin,

Thanks for your kind words. I am always glad to be of help to someone. I still have a way to go, but I am very satisfied with my life. I am doing things today I would have considered impossible when I was growing up.

Hey Gatsby :

You said that OCD is "the doubting disease." If in fact, are you are always in "doubt" about your own actions,than you may be "fearing" your own actions. Then you start to "please" your actions over and over again. Maybe OCD is more of a "pleasing disease". If you learned early on that you could "please" yourself or others by your actions,than you would want to continue those action because it made you "feel" good and safe. Not FEARFUL. Is this where Asperger's comes in to "help" support the "good things about OCD ? :)

Eyes

Actually, Eyes, that was very astute! We give in to our compulsions over and over again because it does make us feel "good" and "safe." The feeling of "pleasure" that results from the compulsion is very short-lived, until the next obsession hits, but it does make us feel as if we are saving someone from danger, be it ourself or someone else. Many people with OCD don't like to be cured because, even though the disease is hell, it's very hard to break. Also, even though we'd love to get rid of our obsessions and the time-consuming compulsions, being obsessive-compulsive is part of our character, and it's scary to think that something that defines our personality that monumentally could be taken away. It is also a "pleasing disease" because OCD-ers are constantly trying to keep everyone happy and safe; we dread making anyone upset or hurting someone's feelings or causing trouble in any way because our over-active conscience just can't take it, and then more guilt sinks in. We do fear our actions because of the doubt. This is seen mostly in the violent obsessions- people who see themselves stabbing another person begin to doubt if they really want to do that and begin to think that, if a knife is around, that they will pick it up and stab someone; this is why they begin to hide knifes and generally avoid contact with any sharp objects. As for Asperger's helping to support the good things about OCD, I'd say that this comes more from what I was saying about how it's a part of us. I'd never want to completely get rid of my OCD traits, and since I also have OCD traits from the Asperger's, which can't be cured, I guess it is nice to know that that part of me will always be with me in some way, shape, or form. :angel:
-GatsbyLuvr1920-

I'm 33 and have mild or high functioning Autism. Fortunately, there's a lot more awareness and understanding about this condition than there was when I was growing up - my condition was misdiagnosed as many other things and there wasn't much help available. Things improved a lot for me in my mid to late twenties. The teenage years can be difficult for any teenager. My advice is that your son is going to encounter difficulties, but there are things you can do to 'cushion' their effect. If a child enters their teens with a fairly high level of self-esteem or confidence, I believe they are far more likely to find it easier. You can do this by encouraging a child's strengths, interests and abilities from an early age - and if there are groups he can join which are centred around those interests, it may make socialisation easier for him. (Everyone has their own strengths and weaknesses.) Having a stable and calm home life, I believe, in which the Autistic child feels 'safe' and understood, also helps matters. Changes in routine or order can tend to make them feel uncomfortable.

The good thing about many young people with Autism is that they can tend to be pretty self-sufficient, anyway - but total withdrawal and disconnection from others is dangerous. Most of them can handle some level of social contact - though it may take them a little longer to 'fit in'.

Considering a career can also be a pressure, in secondary school. I used to feel a bit strange because I seemed to be only interested in maths, science, computers, etc - all the things which are considered 'nerdy', when you are a teen. But in retrospect, I now think 'so what'? Those areas can also lead to great, successful careers - especially in these times. The 'transition' period doesn't last forever, and I believe that the prospects and outlook for Autistic people can be very positive, once they get through the 'awkward stage'. Good luck to you.

smw73
Thank you for your reply. I'm lucky in the fact that he has a brother 13 months younger, he has taught him sooo much. He doesn't fit in and gets very upset sometimes when he thinks he has no friends (which he really doesn't, because he is so far behind the other children) well, one in his spec ed class says he's his friend. But a few do seem to kind of accept him, I think mainly because they like his brother. I do have to brag about his brother travis for a moment though, he just got accepted into PAWS which is for gifted students and to qualify his IQ had to be above 125 :D . Anyway, thank you for responding, i'm glad i posted this, because, it seems to have eased my worries some.
Thank You
robin

Adolescence is a rough time for many people. I find that those who had it easiest in adolescence have grown up to have a lot of difficulties adjusting to adult life. I think of Roger Bannister's comment about adolescence, "The adolescent who is perfectly adjusted to his or her environment, I've yet to meet." He struggled with the social aspects of school despite, or perhaps even because of, his academic accomplishment and atypical interests. I can really relate to him, even though I am not a world class runner.