Hi there

My son is almost a year old.

lately, he has been crying before goign to sleep. I do try the cio, when I need to get my sanity back! :rolleyes:
anyway, I do go in to check on him when he is crying, and if I pick him up, he totally stops crying, and puts his head on my shoulder and calms right down.

but when I go to puthim back in his cot, then the crying starts all over again.

now when he stops crying (because I have picked him up) does that mean he is not in any pain, and just that he wants attention/comfort, and I don't need to worry that he has pain?
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the way I look at it, if he was in any pain (say teething pain) that he wouldn't stop crying when I pick him up. is that right??????? picking him up doesn't take the pain away right? maybe soothes but definitely wouldn't stop pain???????

He might be teething. I know that my DD will be teething and stop crying if I pick her up. It doesn't take the pain away, but it does help to calm them down if they are uncomfortable. But, yes, he's most likely crying and stopping when you pick him up because he loves you and wants to be with you. I keep a tube of teething gel by the crib to help rule that out when my DD is being difficult at night (she's 15 months) Sometimes they'll get clingier when they are getting sick. But usually that becomes pretty obvious after a night of being up.

It's so hard when they can't tell you what's going on. If you suspect teething, give him some tylenol before bed and then apply teething gel right before you lay him down. But most likely he just wants attention. Maybe put more light on in his room or some music or something to "change it up" a bit so that he might find comfort or focus in something else. Good Luck!

My DS #1 who will be 2 in 2 weeks went through this phase as well and still does it sometimes! They are testing you some of the time. They cry because they want your attention and don't want to be alone or have to go to bed. Mind you, this isn't always the case but usually it is! ;) We let him CIO and usually within 2 minutes he stops now. He knows it's bed time but he still tries sometimes! He had a snack, has a new clean diaper, has his suckie and blankie and his music is on. We kissed and hugged him good night and told him we love him. We know he's okay and that he just doesn't want to be in bed alone.
They need to learn that bed time is exactly that! Not time for testing Mommy and Daddy. We can tell the difference between his pain cry or his "give me attention" cry. If he cries for longer than 5 minutes we always check on him but we don't pick him up if we can help it. We hug him while he is standing in his crib and he usually lies back down by himself anyway.
My brother and SIL always picked up my nephew and brought him into their bed and still at age 3 he won't sleep very well and wants to be with them. So much for their love life! LOL.
It wouldn't hurt to give Advil or some other effective pain killer if you think they are teething or behaving in such a way that leads you to believe they are in pain. We did this for ds a few times as well.