Ok so I finally sought help for occasional anxiety/panic attacks.

My problems only occur a couple of times a month... doc gave me Klonopin and Ativan to take as needed. (Well, he wanted me to take one or the other every single day but I decided to take only when needed.)

The problem? When I start to feel anxious and think about taking a pill... I am terrified to take anything! I have a huge fear of feeling "out of control" or feeling like I am "on something". I also am horribly afraid that I will have a bad reaction or OD and die... perhaps I have some allergy to the medication, or perhaps the side effects will hit me hard.

So now I have 2 full bottles of 2 different anti-anxiety meds... and I still have the anxiety! Haven't had a full-on panic attack yet, just some heart palpitations, nervousness but I went straight to bed and made myself fall asleep so that it didn't escalate.

Jeezum I know this is ridiculous but has anyone experienced this? I am all for taking these meds as needed...when I'm feeling fine. But then when the time comes and I am feeling anxious, I get too scared to take them! What is my problem?:eek:

You could be my twin. I am the same way when it comes to medicines. I had only taken tylenol up till about 6 years ago my doctor put me on metoporlol a beta blocker to help with my palps and blood pressure. It took me 2 weeks to get up enough nerve to take it but the palps were so bad i gave in to see if it would help and it did with no major side effects. I will only take amoxicillian for an antibiotic cause ive taken it since i was little and know i wont have any effects from it. In March i had a severe anxiety attack over my health anxiety thinking i was having a heart attack, ended up at the ER they gave me some ativan to help relax me i got the script filled but didnt take any. Two weeks later i ended up at the ER again same reason, they kept me over nite and gave me ativan by IV and some other drugs which scared me to death but i was so scared anyway i thought what the heck if it will save me then ok. They did several test all showed my heart is fine. I dont believe the test i think they are missing something cause i still have issues that i think are due to a blockage in my heart. I do take the ativan if i get really stressed and worried about it but ONLY because they gave it to me at the hospital and i didnt have a reaction so now i will take it. They gave me 2 different anti-depressants, they both still sit in my medicine cabinet, i refuse to take them due to the side effects. My doctor recently put me back on my toporol xl for the palps coming back i dont mind taking it but she also gave me zocor for my cholesterol, im a nervous wreck about taking it and havent started it yet. I am debating on having a heart cath done to finally rule out if i have a blockage or not, they said i dont have to have it done but since my symptoms are still here they will agree to it and maybe to ease my mind, i want it done BUT it scares me that i will be the 1 in 100 that has a serious problem from it. I worry about everything that has to do with my health, its a horrible feeling to live like this everyday. I like you go to bed so i can just sleep through the pains and problems, sleeping is the only time i dont worry and i feel good, i had to go to bed the other nite at 7pm cause i felt an anxiety attack coming on due to some chest pains i was having. So yes i know exactly how you feel and i even go to an anxiety group to try to help with my problem but so far its not doing much good. To ease your mind the ativan really isnt bad at all, for me anyway. I have .5mg tablets and i usually cut it in half and take that before bed or if i get to feeling really anxious about a symptom im having. They just kinda relax me. Just be careful cause from what ive read they are very addicting, i was taking it everyday for a couple of weeks but decided i didnt want to keep doing that so now i just take it as needed.

I was/am the the same way. I don't even like to take cold medicine! :rolleyes: When I started Buspar, it took me 5 days to get up the nerve. I made my fiance stay in with me to watch a movie. Fortunately, even when I felt the side effects, it really isn't bad. My friend's wife had the same fear with Ativan. He said it was very mild--she was alert and had normal thoughts, just didn't get worked up.

If you have a friend you can keep around the first time to keep an eye on you, that's probably a good start. :)

I know!!!!!!! I'm the same way!!! I'm absolutely terrified of taking new medicines because I don't know the way they're going to affect my body. But you know what? There's a simple motto you can remember: If it doesn't make you feel good: then stop. :)

ME TOO!! I won't still to this day even take advil! Im not sure why this is. I also have a huge fear of losing control or getting messed up. I won't drink either. I hate it cause I used to like an occasional drink or night out. Wonder how we can all overcome this fear?

yeah, im the same too!

stress myself into anxiety because of thinking about taking anxiety tablets!

i find that i cant drink (alcohol) either, coz at the time as im getting drunk i keep on having to tell myself you are meant to be feeling relaxed and floppy, and that theres nothing wrong with me, but all this constant self- reassurance does take the fun out of drinking, and theres the hangovers/ blood clot, brain tumour, heart attack, lung cancer to worry about afterwards!!!! hahahahaha, i know its not funny really but you have to laugh when at the time these things feel so real and they are obviously so, so, so daft!

does anyone else feel silly after a major panic attack, when youve calmed down? i do just feel silly to have blown bog standard pins and needles or a runny nose, or period pain out of all believable proportion to induce a panic. its ridiculous really, i do just laugh at myself afterwards though. i think thats whats missing in alot of sufferers lives. laughter....

actually i have a funny story about one of my panic attacks.....

when i pregnant and i went to the toilet to brush my teeth. i opened my mouth to have a little investigation first, when, to my absolute horror my mouth was blood red all over inside. i immediatly sat in a heap on the floor and started shouting my boyfriend up from the garden.
while waiting for him i imagined all the terrible things that could have happened to me, all my teeth were going to fall out, i would have bleeding in my stomach, it would go to my kidneys, i may end up needing a triple heart bypass etcetc, when finally my boyfriend came running upstairs. realising i was very upset he looked into my mouth. i was astonished at what happened next................HE JUST BURST OUT LAUGHING!!!
you see, earlier on, i had eaten a sweet off his cousin and it was thatthat had turned my mouth bright red!!!!! see now thats an example of something that completely took me by suprise and absolutely terrified me, but it was just an absurd over reaction, but very funny now.


lots of love to everyone

and a big (((((((((((((((hug))))))))))))))) to anyone whos feeling anxious today


sarahxxx

lol Sarah that's a perfect story! Just how something so tiny can scare you so bad! I am terrified of losing control just like v_dubgurl, which is also why I don't drink and try to wean myself away from new drugs, and really just drugs in general.

I am also scared to take my meds, i feel that if I take them, how will it make me feel? my xanax makes me sleepy, but the proponolol (sp) my doc tells me to take during the day also makes me feel weird, I want to feel better with these meds, but should I feel scared to take them?

You know, the mind is a powerful thing...and I believe that (especially under stress) we can actually 'imagine' and 'experience' things that are not really happening to us. We can actually trick our brains into 'experiencing' the medications when really its just anxiety. I mean...cmon I took one effexor pill (37.5 mg) and 4 hours later was CONVINCED I was feeling strange (I even went to emergency) but 4 days later or so the same thing happened, all due to my sisters friend being over and I thought she was high on meth and it caused me great stress, and I felt the same way as I did on the effexor.

So I take my first seroquel yesterday and sure enough different (different drug...you see;) ) effects happening all night...but OF COURSE ones I couldn't really explain.:rolleyes:

You see, all this anxiety happened as a result of a bad experience on 'you know' and its almost like I had post-traumatic stress to it, and could easily imagine what it was like to be 'that way' and just worked myself up into a total frenzy.

Honestly though, I took a seroquel last night and after counselling today I HONESTLY felt more like myself. Not totally there, but BETTER.

And tonight Im going ot take it again.

And Im going to listen to my psychiatrist and stop taking it when he tells me to.

These drugs aren't just given to you guys for NO REASON. They are meant to help your brain get back to normal, because sometimes we need a little help.

I am just as scared to death to take them as you are (all of this anxiety comes from altered mental states, knowledge of "don't go there," bad idea!!!), but honestly...it can't hurt...it's positively not going to change your brain chemistry FOREVER in a bad way...it is helping me, and hopefully soon I won't need them anymore.

Good luck to everyone. And at least 'think' about listening to your doctor.

BUT GET A PROFESSIONAL OPINION FROM A PSYCH FIRST, I THINK GP's ARE TOSSING OUT THOSE AD's.

Count me in ! I am petrified to take any new med if I am alone. My psyche doc made some changes today & even as she was speaking I was mentally counting how many days until my daughter goes back to school thinking will I be ok by then to be alone? I hate this -- goes with the territory I guess.

A big yes to that sponseredbynobody. i think doctors do just throw pills at you, without knowing too much about them, or how they actually help without looking in thier book!

pyschiatrists are much more knowledgeble. and they do know what they are talking about. of course you should trust them too. they are only employed to help your mental state, and to help you recover from your anxiety. so they must know what they are saying/doing.

big ((((hugs)))) to everyone

sarahxx

My husband is the same way. One time a few years ago he had an absessed tooth and needed to take an antibiotic. He was missing work and in terrible pain. He wouldn't take it because he just knew he would have one of the reactions listed on the warning label. I called his mom to reassure him that he never had an allergic reaction to any medicine and then ended up fighting with him over taking it. He finally took it because we were fighting about it. I know he was terrified though. He was diagnosed with high cholesterol and given a prescription for lipitor. It took him over a year to take it because of the side effects. The only thing I get very confused with him about is he is so afraid he will die of a heart attack or some other thing but he doesn't go out of his way to take care of himself. Do any of you do this? It is like the more he worries the more he does the absolute wrong things. He has just recently been diagnosed with bipolar after years of being diagnosed with general anxiety disorder. You can read my other post for more details. Anyway with the help of zoloft, xanax, lamactil, and risperidal I think he is finally having more better days than bad. He is really afraid to be alone for fear something will happen to him and nobody will be there to help especially me. If I want to go to the store or go shopping with my friends it is a very big deal. We are in therapy and seeing a Phsyciatrist for everything. I just feel so very sorry for him. I am such an outgoing fun seeking person and he hates to be around more than two people at a time. I just feel like he is in a bubble and missing out on life. I know he feels this way too. Somewhere, before me someone really made him feel worthless and so alone. I do everything I can to reassure but he just says if you don't have anxiety you just can't understand. If I could control it I would. So what is the answer?
I don't believe in giving up. I think everyone in this world has gone through something so why do some people have the ability to get through things and others crumble? Right now he has been off work due to his back for over one year and one half. He had started retraining at college and that is when we found out he has bipolar. People have talked to him about applying for permanent disability but I don't think this is the answer as the less he has to do the more he just gets depressed. He is supposed to start school this Saturday for Tig welding which will be easier on his back. I don't know if he will stay at school or not since he will be away from home. Anyone feel this bad? Please help.

Well, I wish him all the best. I felt pretty bad too, but my meds seem to be helping, at least I think they are.

i still get a little anxiety every morning when it comes time to take my zoloft...
i even get a little anxious taking my vitamins and stuff cuz i worry there's going to be some weird drug interaction with the zoloft...

i've only been on meds for a couple of months, but definitely can empathize...
i was pretty against and afraid of taking any meds for fear of the long term effects...
but my anxiety / panic got so bad that i finally gave in and decided to give it a shot...
i'm feeling a little better these days...
still going to therapy and hoping to get off the meds at some point...
but i think there are a LOT of us who understand what it feels like...
safety in numbers?... lol

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