I haven't binged and purged in a really long time. Well, once a week I allow myself to eat more than I usually do but never binge. But, the last week its like something took over me. I ate so much three days in a row. Yesterday I messed up so bad. I haven't purged in about one year and yesterday I did. I feel terrible, I don't know why I lost control. I don't know how I could have done that to myself I ate so much and so many things that are bad for you. I was doing so well and then I just lost it. I feel like I am worthless and never going to get better. I just wish I was in control of my life. This sucks! I'm 29 years old you would think I had my life in order by now? Sorry guys I just needed to vent.

I think you should be proud of yourself for going a year without binging and purging. Please don't let one mistake take away that great accomplishment. What happened this week doesn't mean that your ED is back or is taking over your life - somehow it just slipped in. That fact that it upset you makes me think that you aren't going to let this happen again anytime soon. Were you going through a lot of stress or did something trigger this binge? I think you are doing great so please don't let this episode bring you down. I have suffered for 12 years with bulimia and there were times I would go months without purging and then something would pop up and cause another one. I knew though my mindset wasn't back where it used to be and I wasn't going to let the ED take control this time. I was in control and it sounds like you are too.

Thanks for replying. Yes, I had a trigger that made me do what I did. I don't think I will let myself do anything like it for a while. Thanks for the words of encouragment.