Katie -

I think Timber is awesome...I have read her posts and she is a fountain of information. The written word is way too open for interpretation, so I apologize for jumping to the conclusion that she was angry...probably my own anger coming through a little there...

Anyway, I was angry because I really felt as if my doctor was keeping me in the dark...I had several problems after my cone biopsy, two days with a catheter, two trips to the ER, hemorrage. I think this is in part due to the fact that she did waaay too many procedures on me at one time. I had laparoscopic bilateral tubal ligation, D&C, hysteroscopy, endometrial ablation (NovaSure) and the cone biopsy all in one pop. When she called with my biopsy results I thought I had the whole scoop, but was still sooo confused. Well, today I talked to my doctor and I scored a copy of pathology report. This is the bad news ver batim:

Endometrial Curretings: fragments of high-grade dysplastic squamous epithelium (is this the uterus??? I think so)

Cervical Cone Biopsy: Severe Dysplasia/Squamous cell carcinoma-in-situ (CIN III) involving endocervical glands

Moderate dysplasia (CIN II) extending to the endocervical biopsy edge

Squamous metaplasia

The portion of my cervix that was biopsied measured 2.5cm x 2.5cm x 1.5cm and considering the average cervix is 3cm x 2.5cm, I don't even know how she got that much out, but whatever. Maybe mine was extra large (LOL)

She told me not to worry, we would follow up with paps and biopsies every two months and treat as necessary and she would not let me get invasive cancer. I felt that it seemed so strange to just wait for it to progress and I could not understand why I did not have an oncologist. Well, it turns out that my follow up WILL be with a gynecological oncologist...one of the best in the nation from what I read, so I now feel sooo much better. She either didn't tell me this or I didn't hear her because I was so upset at hearing that my edges weren't clear. Now I will just sit back and heal from all of this other mess, see them in three weeks and go from there. I can't stress about this anymore and I am not going to cry. Thank you sooo much for listening and responding.

Sharon

Sharon,

Wow, I don't blame you for being angry!...after all that you have been through. I'm so sorry.

And there's no need to apologize to me...I don't know what moved me to respond to that other post. I think I may have been feeling really frustrated myself, and I was able to easily identify the frustration with all of you ladies...it stood out to me more than anything else.

I'm so glad you feel confident with the gyn/onc you wil be seeing. I'm also preparing to meet with a fantastic doctor (next week for my first follow-up ecc since my cone!). I was initially referred to an oncologist who I wasn't comfortable with, so I'm glad I took the initiative to find another doctor. There are very few things we have control over while dealing with this stuff, and finding a doctor we're comfortable with is thankfully one of them.

Two of my biggest challenges through all of this have been 1) loss of control and 2) finding a way to deal with it all. Most days I feel fine and optimistic...but then there are the days when I just burst into tears! I guess this goes back to control; I feel like I have no control over my emotions and no idea of when they'll hit me. I think I've been dealing okay for the most part. I've been keeping myself distracted with friends, activities, and a ton of obsessive cleaning, haha.

So, your next appointment is in 3 weeks? Do you know what you will be having done? I'll be thinking about you and wishing you the best!! Cross your fingers that my ecc comes back with no signs of more AIS!!

Take care and please feel free to write me for any reason at any time.

Katie