Ok, I’m new to this site and looking for advice/guidance from someone who has knowledge and expertise on Herpes – timelines, initial outbreak, symptoms. I would appreciate any info. from those who feel they truly have something to offer as I’ve not seen a Dr. yet and am terribly scared at the moment.

History of the past 32 days:

July 21st I received a call from my ex (together from Sept – Feb’06), I was not sleeping with anyone else and I can only speak for myself, not 100% sure of what he was up to…hence the break-up. I ended up seeing him that night, we had vaginal intercourse (unprotected) and there was ejaculation inside vagina. I saw him again the 23rd and the same thing happened. I did not see him again after this…we broke up for a reason and I had to remind myself of that. However, after intercourse that first time, I had pain during urinating the following day – early evening. I took left over tabs from a Sulpha prescription I had about 5 mths or so ago to treat a UTI…the pain and burning seems to be a common thing that happens to me (mostly this past year or so) after sexual intercourse if I don’t go to the bathroom afterward and also wash myself. The pain during urination cleared up within 2-3 days of taking the medication.

Then the night of Aug 12th, I met up with a male friend of mine (I’ve known for 3 yrs) and a buddy of his, ended up in a drunken state (and already in a highly emotional one – confusion over the ex), went back to my friend’s place and something happened that never had in all the 3 yrs we’ve known one another, we had intercourse (unprotected – but I trust him implicitly and I know he doesn’t sleep around) there was no ejaculation that took place.

At this time however, I ended up feeling sick the morning of Aug 14th with fever, chills, body aches and VERY tired…slept for 1.5 days solid basically. Please note, I also had exposure to a niece of mine on the 12th of August as well who was sick with very similar symptoms (there was no vomiting or diarrhea in both cases and she was sick with these symptoms as well for approx. 2 days). After my 2 days of feeling under the weather, I felt fine and returned to work.

This now brings me to August 17th when I met a man that I had been talking with online and the phone for about a week or so….he is a friend of another friend of mine who thought we’d be a great match! As it turns out, we are very much so. It felt like we had known each other for years, etc. After meeting him we both agreed we wanted to see each other again and that we’d both put dating anyone else aside to see where our dating would take us. On the 18th I saw him again, we were intimate and he assured me had been tested 3 mths earlier and was clean (I took his word as he’s a friend of a very good friend of mine and this person would not have set me up with a guy who’s sleeping with tons of women). I was so tired I didn’t get up to go wash etc., so sure enough by early the following evening I had the pain and discomfort again during urination that seemed to be relieved once again by the sulpha prescription and completely gone within 2-3 days. We had intercourse again on the 20th of August and have plans to see each other tonight.

Which now brings me to today – before going to bed last night I kind of felt a bit of irritation around the genital area. I had actually been a little irritated most of the afternoon and part of the evening as the underwear (thong style) I was wearing was buggin me. It seems I have very sensitive skin and such around this area and at times I don’t wear underwear at all with my pants/shorts…which my now current b/f of this past week says not to do as it could be part of the cause of recurrent UTI’s and such…especially if the pants are tight (which they are much of the time). Anyway, when feeling the slight irritation around the genitals last night, I took a look and noticed I had a little pinkish bump close the opening of the vagina on the right side…but again, it’s not like I’ve never had a pimple like bump in this area before, especially if there’s been irritation from a pair on panties or aggressive sex. It was not puss filled and wasn’t that bothersome, just felt a bit of irritation if touched or clothes rubbed against it. This morning when I woke up I had the same irritation only there seems to be a the same sort of reddish bump on the left side as well that’s a little closer to the vaginal opening that seems to be a little more bothersome due to the spot it’s in (more moisture). I was also wearing a pair of polyester boxers to bed last night that tend to rub and stuff when I move around a lot in my sleep (which I do often). This reddish bump on the left side is a bit itchy but again, only if I touch the area, but not while sitting, standing or walking.

I also have a dull aching on the left side of my lower back and what feels to be my fallopian tube area. I don’t think it’s in the groin area and even if it were, I’ve been having pains such as these for 2 yrs now since a car accident I was in, as well, I am to start my period this weekend and some of aches and pains are also PMS type symptoms that I regularly get. This is why I’m not overly alarmed, accept for the little red bump on the left side this morning that I didn’t notice last night but I also didn’t give it a thorough check over either. The bump on the right side is almost gone already and doesn’t seem to be bothersome at all today….neither bumps were puss filled or blister like and the one on the left side even though it’s a bit itchy and burning (also due to me scratching at it this morning which I shouldn’t have done as it made the top of the bump a little raw, hence the burning), anyway it’s still not puss filled or blister like either.

If anyone has anything to offer in the way of advice on how to proceed I would be so grateful. My family Dr. is away on holidays right now and not back until the 2nd week of Sept. and I’ve scheduled an appt. with her but can’t get in until Sept. 20th. I am feeling rather embarrassed and uncomfortable at the thought of going to another Dr. being that it’s of a rather personal nature. I also don’t want to overreact assuming there’s something more going on like Herpes when there seems to be a logical explanation to much of the symptoms I do have or had.

I look forward to a reply back,

Thank you.

PS. If this turns out to be nothing, I certainly have met the most wonderful man and I will not be participating in unprotected sex ever again. This past month or so was completely out of character for me…but no excuses, the behavior and choices were wrong and I acknowledge that.

Some of the things you describe are not herpes related, some are. That being said don't trust an online diagnosis from your verbal description. I also recommend not trusting a visual exam as proof that you have or do not have herpes. Visual exams are incorrect 30% of the time.

You can stop by your local HealthDept for a herpes blood test, usually as a 'walk-in'. The correct test is an IgG type specific test, HerpeSelect is the most common. Your local Health Dept is probably more up to speed on proper herpes testing than your regular doctor.

As shocking as this sounds, a standard STD exam doesn't include a Herpes test. So while someone may say they're 'clean', unless they have copies of the results, it's safeer to assume they were not tested for herpes. The doctor may draw blood, and even say you're clean, but the odds are about 95% they didn't perform a herpes test. When you get an STD exam, you need to request a herpes test.

Some quick stats on Herpes: 60-80% of the population has oral herpes also know as coldsore or fever blisters. Most people get it as child when getting kissed from a family member. 1 in 4 adults has genital herpes, yet 90% don't know it cause the symptoms are so mild they go unnoticed or misdiagnosed. So the next person you talked to has a 25% chance of having this common genital virus, yet they'll be thinking they're clean.

About testing: The antibodies for Herpes take a while to develop, some times as fast as two weeks, some times 16 weeks or longer. So if this is an initial outbreak, your test results might come back negative because not enough time has passed to develop the antibodies; and a followup test as 16 weeks would be needed. Your current partner should get tested too, so you can both know your complete HSV status.

Thank you for your reply.

As it turns out, I went to a walk-in yesterday after work with the symptoms I described in my post. The Dr. who saw me didn’t even do a vision exam even after I voiced my concern about the rash I seem to have…instead he gave me a prescription to treat a UTI as there was trace blood in the urine sample (which I am sure I do have anyway, but this rash is definitely not normal of any UTI that I’ve ever had) and he gave a prescription for a topical cream to treat said rash…THAT HE DIDN’T EVEN LOOK AT. So I filled the prescriptions and started the pills last night and the cream this morning. FYI – I may have failed to mention that I was having UTI symptoms last Friday and took part of a left over prescription from an infection I had 5 mths ago and the symptoms stopped within 48 hrs (I took this medication for 3 days – the new medication I started last night, one dose and took a dose this morning as well).

Anyway, by 8:30 this morning I was feeling even worse and when I took a look at the area of the rash, instead of two pumps there were now 2 more little bumps close to the one of the left side, still no sores in the vaginal area but two additional bumps none the less and the area seemed more irritable this morning than yesterday. So this morning I went into Non-emergency at one of the hospitals for further testing…clearly wasn’t gonna get it from this walk-in I had gone to yesterday…..

The Dr. in emergency said to continue with the medication for the UTI even though today the urine test was negative…but he says the symptoms I describe are classic and being that it’s been partially treated it’s not uncommon for a UTI test to come back negative, plus if there was obviously blood in the urine yesterday and last Friday when I started up with the left over meds. I had from my last infection, than it’s almost certain that’s what it is.

However, this Dr. actually did perform a visual and internal exam taking scrapings from the cervix as well as the sores around the vaginal area. He said there seems to be some discharge from the cervix (however, I’ve had my own family Dr. make this observation in the past as well during a annual physical and what ever she tested for has always come back negative – only there has never been presence of bumps/sores before now). This Dr. also said that the rash and two sores do look suspicious and this was basically what he said “because there were 2 more bumps this morning than previously and the two sores that were already there appear to have what’s called “crates” on the top, my concern is that there is a “similarity” to the genital herpes virus, though there seems to be no presence of blisters or blistering”. Then he said he couldn’t say for sure until the results come back and to not jump to conclusions. But really, what else could or would it be??????

I said “so you mean if this is the herpes virus I coincidentally have an initial outbreak going on at the same time as a bladder infection?” To which he replied “yes, that can happen” but then he said that because these bumps/sores began to appear over the last 48 hrs yet there are so few of them and rather separate instead of being in a large patch and there none visual inside the vagina or the labia, that if it is an outbreak it’s a mild one and likely not an initial outbreak as they’re almost always more severe than what I have going on right now. So of course this confused me even more!! As I had already told him, I have never had these particular types of sores before now, that this was a first. He’s making it sound like I’ve had the virus for a while or something when this has never happened to me before…so of course this upset me even more. Then he basically said that if that is the case and this is an initial outbreak, than it seems I’ve been exposed to the virus fairly recently…though he said some people have the virus for quite some type remaining symptom less until something triggers an outbreak….so again, this confused me! Then he said that was more uncommon, that most who have the virus will have symptoms almost immediately IF they’re actually going to have symptoms and said that with an outbreak of the sores that they appear quick, usually within the first few days or so of exposure. So I have no idea when I was exposed or what after all of what he said…I’m confused. :O(

I went in expecting the worst but hoped for the best….I do not believe my prayers will be answered this time. :O(

If it turns out I do have this virus now, how do I know if it’s my new boyfriend that exposed me to it? We were intimate late night/early morning of last Friday and intimate again 2 days after that….the first bump/sore appeared late Tuesday night with two bumps showing Wednesday morning. That would mean that if it is him that has exposed me, I then reacted within 4-5 days. However, I was with the friend of mine where oral took place and vaginal intercourse but no ejaculation about a week before that which would place the timeline at 12 days as of today. Again, I’ve known this particular person for 3 yrs and we actually had fooled around back in December (8 mths ago where he performed oral on me but that’s all that happened that night) and I seemed to be fine after that night. Not to mention that both my friend and my now current b/f don’t have any visual symptoms that I’ve seen or am aware of….oral or genital. So then I wonder if it was my ex who I ended up being intimate with 4-5 weeks ago, but if the Dr. says that the outbreak of sores usually will occur within the first 3-5 days after exposure (IF a person is going to have symptoms) than how can it be the ex from a month or so ago? I am SO confused….please anyone, your help/knowledge is desperately needed….. :O(

Signed:

Wishing I could turn back time….
I KNEW better damn it!!! I knew better…. :O(

One comment really disturbs me and that's saying that your new BF hasn't been with tons of women so you wouldn't think he'd have herpes????????
"(I took his word as he’s a friend of a very good friend of mine and this person would not have set me up with a guy who’s sleeping with tons of women)" Whoever said to have herpes you have to be with tons of women...honey, it only takes one!!!!!!!!!!!!!:confused: There's that misconception again that to have herpes you have to be dirty or a sleazy person. I have genital herpes...I've been with 2 men in 25 years!!!!!

I am so sorry...please don't take my words in the wrong way. What I meant by that comment is that most std's are about who you're sleeping with and how many, etc., and then who they've slept with, etc....was no specifically making that comment toward the Herpes virus, but std's in general. I did not mean any harm, sorry.

Your case isn't the norm and you have to be aware of that, as I'm sure you are. The fact of the matter is, if you don't have physical symptoms and haven't been specifically tested for the std and you're having unprotected sex on top of it, you run the risk....I made a mistake, I know this....oh god do I know this. I wish I could turn back time, but I can't....I now brace myself for the results next week of the tests taken today and the outcome isn't looking so bright.

I do apologize once again if I've offended you in any way...was not my intent.