Hello,

I am wondering if certain chemicals in topical creams are known to instigate a herpes break out.

I'm sorry if this comes out all jumbled to get to a point... I haven't really talked about any of this and feel I should, however embarassed and upset it makes me...

So... please just look at the last question. That's my reason for posting. Thanks.

I've been with the same person for almost 3 years, with no other sexual partners and my partner swears he hasn't either. We've both had partners before each other. My partner has never had a herpes outbreak that he was aware of. I hadn't either, until about 2 months ago. I understand that herpes can be "silent" and some people never know they have it because they never have an outbreak. However, I've also read that the first outbreak is usually the worst. So, when I had my first ?noticeable outbreak, and it was really horribile, that made me wonder if I had JUST gotten the virus (from my partner who says he's never had an outbreak and has never been diagnosed). But how could that be? We've had lots of sex prior to that. Nothing was different. Not stress, diet, the way we had sex, nothing I can think of. So surely I'd had it for a while??? But I don't know. So there's one issue. WHEN DID I GET HERPES? I keep trying to tell myself that it doesn't matter, but it does. I want to place blame or something. Somehow I want to feel better about this.

So I'm wondering if I got it from my partner, whom I told after I found out from a doctor. My partner still hasn't been tested, so I don't know if he has it too, and if he does have it, did I give it to him? Did he give it to me? Somehow I feel I would feel better if he gave it to me. I feel so horribly guilty and almost panick-y when I think about him not having it and me maybe giving it to him any day. I wish I knew if he had it or not. He knows I have it, he says it's not important, he says he wants to be with me... but still I feel vulnerable to him turning on me when he gets an outbreak... to him suddenly hating me. So there's another issue. DID HE GIVE IT TO ME OR AM I A THREAT/ALREADY GAVE IT TO HIM? I keep trying to tell myself that it doesn't matter, since he's making informed decisions, but I feel tainted and dirty and "lesser". Sometimes I wish he had it so I could stop wondering and/or feel equal to him. But if he did get it/have it, I wish I could know that I would feel like it wasn't ME who gave it to him. Or that it wouldn't bother me to never know who gave it to whom.

And man do I feel like this wretched creature in public sometimes. When I go to a public restroom I think to myself: I'm the person people put toilet paper on the seat for. When I hear jokes about Herpes I feel so embarassed and silent. I don't want anyone to know. WHY IS THERE SUCH A WRETCHED STIGMA? Surely by now there are many many people that don't fit a sleezy stereotype... but... of course I don't think it should be mainstream and I don't think this should be reserved for a certain "type" of people.

I don't know if I really have Herpes. Maybe I'm in denial, but I mean... sometimes Western's are wrong. I'm a biotechnologist... and I hate the nurse that took the samples (I HATE YOU NURSE) - she's messed up several things before (caused my hair to fall out, etc.). ARE THERE TESTS FOR HERPES THAN CAN BE PERFORMED WHEN NOT HAVING AN OUTBREAK? This would also help solve my question of whether my partner had herpes. The nurse said a person has to have an outbreak to do a test.

I had two outbreaks (I guess, if I have Herpes). Both situations occured following application of BURT'S BEES BABY BEE DIAPER OINTMENT. The symptoms (burning when peeing, itch, tingling down back of legs, others) were compliant with those possible with a herpes outbreak. However, why only after Burt's Bees Diaper Ointment? As much as I've had sex with my boyfriend for almost 3 years (both of us monogomous) one would think that if I had already had herpes, or I hadn't had it before him and he gave it to me (he hasn't ever had an outbreak and has not been diagnosed)... one would think that I would have had an outbreak before this??? or no? OR IS THIS POSSIBLY A RASH and I don't have herpes??? Perhaps the evil nurse who's messed up terribly with my health before AGAIN was wrong - that the Western blot result was wrong.

FIRST QUESTION> Is it possible that I don't have herpes/that the Western was wrong/that Burt's Bees Diaper Ointment merely gave me a rash? SECOND QUESTION> Are certain chemicals in topical creams known to instigate a herpes break out? The ingredients of Burt's Bees Baby Bee Diaper Ointment is as follows: Zinc oxide, sweet almond oil, beeswax, tocopheryl acetate & tocopherol (vitamin E), johoba oil, lavandin oil, retinyl palmitate (vitamin A), extracts of rosemary, lavender, candula, chamomile, rose petal and comfrey root. THIRD QUESTION> I disposed of the ointment. Should I try it again and go see an actual doctor (Not that nurse I hate) to see if I have herpes for sure???? Is there a way to test for herpes without an outbreak???? FOURTH QUESTION> The point of me using the ointment was to prevent redness/irritation during my period. I don't use tampons and have trouble sometimes keeping the area between my vagina and anus dry. Is there another ointment I CAN use if I have herpes that won't give me an outbreak??? Thank you very much for reading and please please PLEASE help me with ANY of the questions above.

Okay first off you have herpes. I mean I am not a doctor or anything but by what you just described, it ain't no rash. Sorry. Especially if you have been diagnosed with it also. When I first got it I kept hoping and praying that it was a rash or something too. I mean I guess it is possible the Burts Bee gave you a rash but I highly doubt it - I mean that what the stuff is for to clear up rashes, and I assume the diaper rash stuff is for babies right, they have sensitive skin, so whatever is in that stuff probably DID NOT make you break out in a rash, now as far as the outbreak is concerned - if you noticed teh outbreak(s) after you used the ointment not once but twice - I would say Yeah that is what is triggering your outbreaks.

And in your last paragraph I fail to see a question regarding who gave it to whom. If you havent sleot around with anyone else than it had to have been him that gave it to you.

When you get herpes, the morning after you get "infected" you will wake up with a sore throat - like it is swollen and you are having a little bit of a difficult time swallowing, then from that first sign it will take anywhere from 2-4 weeks for your first and worst outbreak to appear. SO think back when you got your fist outbreak and you got infected give or take about a month before that. You need to either have a SERIOUS conversation wiht your boyfriend and tell him that you didn't catch it from the ******ing air and that he either needs to fess up that he is not being monogamous or you need to leave - I suppose in a long shot it is (very unlikely in my book) he may have had the virus laying dorment in him all along just waiting but after 3 years of sex and all of a sudden it turns up in your relationship now , doesn't sound feasible to me.

I hope that helped you a little - even though it wasn't what you wanted to hear :(

My question is....Why were you using the Burt Bee stuff in the first place...I can only assume you used it because of an itch or something...right???????! You wouldn't be putting it there for no reason so how can you say it started after using it?

I figured the question of why you are even using that crap in the first place is a whole new thread!!!! I didnt even really want to go there!!!

Well I asked that because she thinks that she may just have an allergic reaction to BB and not herpes so my question is or(I should say) my point is that she put it on herself because of some type of irritation in the first place so irritation(herpes) happened first...not allergic reaction if one should exist. (of course someone could have an allergic reaction to that BB stuff but it was being used for a reason...it wasn't just being put down there for the heck of it!)

Everyone wants to ignore herpes symptoms or associate them with something else. It's kinda like that thread that...I believe was started by lysineuser...was asking what excuses you've heard from partners to explain away herpes. So yours would be "I had an allergic reaction to BB medication" right? When I saw the red sore on my BF, he said it was an irritation from friction(if ya know what I mean?) so I just took his word for it and he really did believe that's what it was unless he's just a really good liar! I had an ob about 9 months from the first time we had sex and in that time he had a couple "Irritations" on himself. But then I had the Big OB and I just knew that those little irritations were herpes and that he gave it to me....his response when I told him that those irritations were herpes and that he gave me herpes was "I've been getting that for 30 years" and my reply was...and so "you've had herpes for 30 years then!!!!!!!!!!!" Like he had gotten so used to getting irritation from after masterbation that he didn't think anything of it and just thought that was normal. OK so your new BF may have given it to you and he never put 2 and 2 together that some little red spot or irritation(or minor itch even) can really be herpes...herpes is seldom like the internet pictures out there! As far as the other poster saying you get a sore throat first....well I have never had a sore throat...there are so many different symptoms and almost everyone reacts differently to herpes OBs. Between the first big OB that I had and the first time we made love, I had a couple time I felt like I was getting a bladder infection but that went away in a few days and also a couple different times that I had a couple bumps around the pubic hair area that I just wrote off as from shaving and never once did it ever cross my mind that it could be herpes because I mean "who would I have gotten it from...noone I have been with has 'herpes'" Right? Well that's what I thought and then the couple bumps went away in a couple days anyway.

[As far as the other poster saying you get a sore throat first....well I have never had a sore throat...there are so many different symptoms and almost everyone reacts differently to herpes OBs.]

Okay first never had a sore throat? :)

What I was saying is when you contract herpes, you will not wake up the next morning and all of a sudden you have this huge and might I say painful OB; When your body contracts the virus it will take anywhere from 2-4 weeks (4 wks for me) for you to actually get that first OB but that more or less depends on the individual. The morning after you are "infected" you will wake up and you will not feel 100%. You body will have some kind of reaction to being infected the night before. If not then you must have an awesomely strong immune system for it not to give off any signs [by having swollen glands] that is was infected. I think it was you just didn't know what was happening to your body or didn't realize what was happening at the time because at the time I didnt really pay much attention to the signs either. It was during my first and only awful OB (i cried the ENTIRE 2 weeks non-stop) that I spent that time racking my brain and then one day I remembered that one morning a month back I woke up with my throat sore [from the swollen glands]

There were signs you just didn't realize it because thats what our bodies do when they are sick or "infected" they let us know in their little subtle ways.

When you get herpes, the morning after you get "infected" you will wake up with a sore throat - like it is swollen and you are having a little bit of a difficult time swallowing,

This was your quote^^^I did not mean that I've never in my life had a sore throat...what I meant is herpes didn't give me a sore throat!

In my last post I said what were MY not recognized first symptoms...the glands that were swollen in me where my glands in my groin. I certainly did have symptoms that I can look back on that I didn't realize at the time were herpes but no sore throat and I'm sure I'm far from being the only one that never had a sore throat from herpes. A general feeling of ill health...yep...slightly feverish...yep...burning urination...yep...

If someone has a sore throat...who the heck is going to associate that with getting genital herpes anyway. I will guess that not one single person is going to wake up and think...I have a sore throat...I must have genital herpes...what people need to realize is that if they are sexually active, they should have a herpes blood tests done and a routine std test is not going to do that...they must ask for it to be done. They cannot expect to have herpes jump up and slap them in the face and say "you have genital herpes"...because it usually doesn't behave that way. Usually it's symptoms that noone unless they have done research would ever dream would be herpes.