I really fear getting herpes.. so much that I really suffer in my love life.
I have a couple girls gettiing pissed at me right now because I keep changing the subject when they bring up going out or something...I know they are sexual girls and while on one hand, I definitely need to get laid, on the other, I'm so fearful of getting something from them that I dont risk it..

So my question.. I can use a condom..I have no prob with that.. but what can I possibly do to lessen my chance of getting herpes from kissing?

Well here this may help you become even more overly paranoid!!!

Condoms won't protect you from getting Herpes. Especially if you are a guy and you are with a girl that has them, when you are having sex with her, more than just the tip of your thing will make contact with her. When your bodies touch you are risking getting herpes maybe not on the tip but at the base of the shaft, and then it will just spread.

My thought for you is too don't stress too much about it - pick your girls wisely - do use protection and save all your stressing you are doing now for the day when and if you actually do get a STD. Don't get me wrong it is good that you want to be safe -

Why don't you also find a girl that you can be monogamous with then you won't have to worry and you can actually enjoy sex like any other normal person.

I don't have any sympathy for people who fear getting it. Try being already depressed and then contracting it if you want to know how much life sucks. I got my herpes from a virgin who gave me head...so you're never really safe.

I lived myself as an herpephobe for years. I was well-informed on the subject, slept with very few people (all long-trem boyfriends and we'd wait for months). I read up extensively on the subject, knew that condoms weren't a truly-effective solution, knew that most people who had it didn't know they had it, blah blah blah. And guess what--- I have herpes. Life is funny that way.
It certainly hasn't been the end of the world, though. I am currently in a realtionship (and we're planning on getting married) with a wonderful man who (as far as we know) does not have herpes.
There are some crazy things to catch out there, but you still have to live your life. Be as safe as you can. Know your partner and do what you can to reduce your chances of transmission.
I really thought Herpes would have been the worst thing ever. It terrified me. But I'm still standing and I am in the best relationship of my life--- with great sex.
Be safe, be smart, but live your life!

never mind...I just saw the post originator is banned...