Hi all,

Could not find my previous post to add a reply to it. Last week I was so down regarding my "aching back", so I posted, and I got so many encouraging replies. Thanks to all, it really helped.

NOW, I mentioned that I had an appt. with my Pain Mgmt. Dr. today., and I was very concerned because at the last appt. he basically gave me four choices. (1. continue pallitive pain medications 2. a spinal stimulator 3. find another neurosurgeon to eval. me & my MRI's 4. get another Pain Mgmt. Dr., who might have a differnet view, ideas)

Today, I brought my daughter with me, she is wonderful, she is in the medical profession, so she knew how to phrase the questions etc. Today was like visiting a different Dr., wow, he mentioned the above, but said that for now, until we can't anymore, we will continue the pain meds., because they do help, and I am adjusting to the life they allow me. For some reason, my problem isn't showing up clearly....every MRI appears to have different stuff on them..so we are going to get a radiologist to look at everything, and see what he can find.... IF, my back really starts acting up again, we will go on to maybe a new MRI (?why?)...mylogram and possibly surgery at that point. My present PM Dr., said that he has seen me in varying states of pain, and anxiety (yes, but when you don't get answers, and only increasing problems and pain, I think that anxiety would be expected) but today, I was looking better to him..(thanks to daughter!)...So he then wrote me out my 3 month prescription...said to come back in 3 months...

So basically it's a waiting game...back will stay the same, get better or get worse...at which time they will supposedly do some aggressive looking.

I was so upset because I really do like this Dr., and the threat of him withdrawing his services really bothered me....so I guess for now I just go on in the same way I have been for the last several months.

No change really, not much info...but at least if my back does do a really bad flare they will hopefully go looking...for now, let's just wait and see.....for some reason that doesn't sound right, but what the heck... My daughter said it's kind of like you are in mourning for your old life, and once you accept the present life, you will be better off....less expectations....knowing your limits, that you will loose the anxiety and appreciate what you do have....That does make sense in a weird way...I think I am about 3/4ths of the way to acceptance. Not happy about it, but what else can I do.

Just thought I'd fill you in on the appt....

Sage

Glad to hear that your daughter went with you. Don't neccessarily take your PM doc wanting to refer you to another PM doc as a bad thing. Sometimes they feel like they've done everything they can for you and that maybe a new set of eyes might help.

I don't remember if you said in your other post, but have you ever had a discogram? My MRI's and CT scans never showed up anything that should be causing the kind of pain that I'm in. Once I was finally sent to my PM doc and he decided to do a discogram we got to the root of the problem and found out what was causing my pain. Yes, they are painful, but give a better picture than an MRI or CT ever can.

I hate when doctors tell you that you look better one day just because you aren't in tears from the pain. Some days we just deal with the pain better, it's not that we're not still in pain.:mad: I swear, unless you live in pain, you can't possibly understand.

Your daughter is right - we do go through a mourning period. You want and miss your old life. you want to fight to get it back. You want to scream and yell and blame someone - but there is no one to blame, it's no one's fault. Acceptance does help some, but if you don't have answers, do not accept that this is always going to be the way your life is. I had no choice but to accept that the wonderful, full life I had before is gone and will never come back. They could still figure out what is causing your pain and find a way to fix it - so please, don't give up just yet.;)

Take care and thanks for the update:angel:

Sage! :wave: I finally found you! I am soo sorry to hear you are going through so much trouble. Are you still using the same doctors we discussed before? I am still happy with them to some degree.

I just started physical therapy again only this time post op and I have to say, I really feel like it is going to get me back into shape. It is really hard, I call it physical torture ha ha. Some things hurt really bad so I can't do those yet. I have been having some trouble with the right side of my body, hip to ankle and they are trying to build up the strength to see if it is from the muscle weakness. In PT, my hip goes out to try and protect my spine and leg. It is so wierd. I say someone nicked a nerve, but hopefully not.

I really hope you will get some resolve soon. I just realize yesterday that my condition completely consumed my life for 3 years. I had pain longer than that but it took 3 years from the time I started to need something stronger than Excedrin and or Advils to the point of surgery. Part of that was a period of time where they were ready to act but I didn't have very good insurance at the time. I pray you don't have to wait that long.

A friend of mine was having terrible pain in her cervical spine area and they recommended a TENS unit that she could use at home or even out because it is so small. It is like a nerve stimulator only it isn't implanted. She used it religiously for a few months in addition to the pain meds, ice and heat and for now, she is pain free and not using it anymore.

Please keep us posted and know you are in my thoughts and prayers often.

Sincerely,
Lisa

Lisa,

I did try the exercises you told me about....I have done them in PT previously. Will try doing them everyother day for a while and see what happens...think they made me ache a bit more the first time I tried them...but that could be my muscles!!

Thanks for the hint..

Sage