LurchMomma
08-27-2006, 11:13 AM
Ok so my husband will probally be coming home in a few days. And honestly I am scared. Our house is very umm... lively. We have 6 kids ranging from age 10 down to newborn. Not to mention 6 cats and 4 dogs. So the hospital is probally pretty heavenly compared to here. Dont get me wrong I love our home and kids. If it is to quiet I get worried because the kids are usually in something. ( like right now the 2 and 1/2 year and 18 month are arguing over apples. They both have one.) But I am worried about how he will deal with it all when he comes home and how do I help. Or can I even help? We have been married for 5.5 years now and in those year we have had 5 children( a set of twins in there) The 10 year old is my stepson and he is hard to live with on his own. He hates me and has made it known. He has been hospitalize 2X in those years. The 1st time wasnt so bad we only had the twins who were infants at the time. But this time has really effected all the children. And has emotionaly wrecked me( yes I know he will probally read this when he comes home) I am just worried how we will all adjust when he comes home. He is a hard person to live with emotionaly. He wont tell me anything. I just get left flapping in the wind. So if things are to much when he comes home he wont tell me. Ok well now that I have rambled on and on any advice would be welcomed
Thanx
Tiffany
Thanx
Tiffany
Sponsor
goody2shuz
08-27-2006, 01:00 PM
Hi, Tiffany:wave: Welcome!!! You are in the right place and hats off to you for seeking the support you will need.
The good news is that if Arthur wants help and seeks it that is a very good step. Most of the time when somebody is Bipolar they will not seek the help out or comply with it. From Arthur's first post here it is apparent that he wants to get better and knows he needs the help so that is a very BIG step.
The first stepping stone to somebody who is Bipolar is stabilization. Without the right meds the imbalance wil affect almost every aspect of a Bipolar's life. That is the stepping stone that I am currently on with my 15 year old daughter. She knows that she has Bipolar and is trying to reach stabilization. Unfortunately that is a process unto itself and may take some time which us family members sometimes are impatient with, myself included.;)
Has Arthur been on meds before????? Was he stabilized after his first hospitalization??? The reason I ask is that if he was and then suddenly got worse it may be due to outside stressors which do interfere with ones stability. It seems that you have a new one which is the birth of a new baby...they say that any big changes in one's life whether it be a new marriage, divorce, a move, a new baby, or starting a new school year, any of these things will cause stress upon somebody. And with somebody who is Bipolar quadruple that whether they are stabilized or not the severity of how they will react is dependent on how stable they are to begin with.
My daughter is home on a long weekend visit from being hospitalized for 2 months (this is her 4th hospitalization) and we had somewhat of a meltdown yesterday.....we are getting ready to go back to school and she had just got her schedule in the mail and her mood changed from excitement to frustration in a matter of an hour. Seems that she made phonecalls to her friends to see who was in her classes and lunch period......as the day went on her frustration and anger increased to eventually her running out of the house into the dark. I found her on our street corner sitting in the dark by a fence with her knees drawn in with tears rolling down her face. She wouldn't share with me what was wrong and ran into her room and cried. I gave her sometime and checked on her before I went to bed and told her we would talk about things in the morning but I just wanted to tell her that I loved her.
I think, Tiffany that until our loved ones are stabilized they need for us to keep their stress levels down as much as possible and to reassure them of our love and support. The rest is really up to them. We cannot force them to tell us what's up but we can reassure them that we are there to talk to whenever they may need.
Arthur will need to learn how to deal with his stress even when stabilized. Things that cause you & I no stress will definitely be stressful for somebody who is Bipolar. And they will need to develop the coping skills to be able to ride it through.
I am here for you if you need.....it isn't easy seeing a loved one hurting and wanting to fix something that only they can fix. But we can let them know that we love them and have faith in them to get themselves well again.
(((HUGS))) ~ Goody:wave:
The good news is that if Arthur wants help and seeks it that is a very good step. Most of the time when somebody is Bipolar they will not seek the help out or comply with it. From Arthur's first post here it is apparent that he wants to get better and knows he needs the help so that is a very BIG step.
The first stepping stone to somebody who is Bipolar is stabilization. Without the right meds the imbalance wil affect almost every aspect of a Bipolar's life. That is the stepping stone that I am currently on with my 15 year old daughter. She knows that she has Bipolar and is trying to reach stabilization. Unfortunately that is a process unto itself and may take some time which us family members sometimes are impatient with, myself included.;)
Has Arthur been on meds before????? Was he stabilized after his first hospitalization??? The reason I ask is that if he was and then suddenly got worse it may be due to outside stressors which do interfere with ones stability. It seems that you have a new one which is the birth of a new baby...they say that any big changes in one's life whether it be a new marriage, divorce, a move, a new baby, or starting a new school year, any of these things will cause stress upon somebody. And with somebody who is Bipolar quadruple that whether they are stabilized or not the severity of how they will react is dependent on how stable they are to begin with.
My daughter is home on a long weekend visit from being hospitalized for 2 months (this is her 4th hospitalization) and we had somewhat of a meltdown yesterday.....we are getting ready to go back to school and she had just got her schedule in the mail and her mood changed from excitement to frustration in a matter of an hour. Seems that she made phonecalls to her friends to see who was in her classes and lunch period......as the day went on her frustration and anger increased to eventually her running out of the house into the dark. I found her on our street corner sitting in the dark by a fence with her knees drawn in with tears rolling down her face. She wouldn't share with me what was wrong and ran into her room and cried. I gave her sometime and checked on her before I went to bed and told her we would talk about things in the morning but I just wanted to tell her that I loved her.
I think, Tiffany that until our loved ones are stabilized they need for us to keep their stress levels down as much as possible and to reassure them of our love and support. The rest is really up to them. We cannot force them to tell us what's up but we can reassure them that we are there to talk to whenever they may need.
Arthur will need to learn how to deal with his stress even when stabilized. Things that cause you & I no stress will definitely be stressful for somebody who is Bipolar. And they will need to develop the coping skills to be able to ride it through.
I am here for you if you need.....it isn't easy seeing a loved one hurting and wanting to fix something that only they can fix. But we can let them know that we love them and have faith in them to get themselves well again.
(((HUGS))) ~ Goody:wave: