would I have married hubby 20 yrs ago If i knew then what I know now? I have wondered that myself so many times that it drives me crazy. my answer? No probably not. is that right or wrong? who knows it an honest answer. does this bipolar mania , paranoia physcotic tenadancy to go manic( officical diagnosis). he is currently more stable since he stopped taking theTrazadone. Side effects were almost sending back into manic phase. currently taking lithium, seroquel, zyprekza.hes not bouncing off the walls but stilllots of anger and delusions . I am currently offwork to help himbut am ready to go back after labor day.I can only do so much and therest is p to him. his pdoc is on vac til9-15 so its just us .CALGON TAKE ME AWAY!!! old commercials :) . any thoughts on trazadone? pdoc is going tobe upset with me for taking him off of it, but he shouldnt be on vacation right now .Just kidding. Hoping that some day the magic pill will be found and everybodys problems will be instantly cured is that to much to hope for?

WifeofBp20yrs ~ Hats off to you for you definitely put into effect the "through good times and bad, through sickness and health" part of marriage vows!! I am in a different seat of this whole rollercoaster as a mother to a 15 year old yet to be stabilized!!! But it's still the same scary ride as far as I am concerned!! I am praying for the day that a wonderful young man will take over LOL:D But for now I am doing my mother thing of nurturing and loving her despite all that it drains out of me!!! I hear you on the CALGON TAKE ME AWAY!! I'm with you, Wifey!!!;)

I don't know anything about Trazadone....but there is a wonderful poster here that knows alot about meds who will problably chime in!!! And I happen to really like her:D

I just wanted to tell you that I know and I appreciate your honesty. Just yesterday when my daughter was talking about wanting to drop out of a course in school and give up she said that she should be able to have that right just like I do!!! And I shared with her how many times I could have dropped out of being mom and hadn't since the day she were born and that she could do her part by doing the same!!!:jester:

It's exhausting but I am finding that the more we take care of ourselves the more that we are equipped to take care of others.!!;)

((((HUGS))))) because we could all use them ~ Goody:angel:

Hey, there, Wife! My husband is BP, too. Many, many times I have asked myself the very same question!!! Then I remind myself that the man I married was not sick at the time. AND I also remind myself that I would not change a thing because I have my little boy because of my marriage. So...just to let you know that you are NOT the only person wondering about that subject! That would be a miracle IF anyone ever had a pill that did it all!!! Anyway, know that you are not alone living like this...come here and post whenever you need to!!! HUGS, Kym. :wave: