jakey
08-29-2006, 03:44 PM
Hi, I have a 4 yr. old son named Jacob who has autism. He is in special education in public school. We have been fortunate to have great teachers up until this point. This year he is in a pre-k class that is half regular ed. and half sp. ed. I knew going in that this would be more challenging than his previous classes. Although he has an aide and is doing fairly well, his teacher seems so put out by him. Honestly she acts like she has no clue about autism. She tells me he has no concept of using the potty ( we have been working on this for quite some time and he is making progress it is just slow). She asked me if it was normal that he wasn't potty trained by now and admitted that she needed to do some research because she wasn't familiar with it. Then to top it off, when I picked Jacob up yesterday she was very aggravated and told me that he refused to paint. So I said that I would work with him on this at home more ( trying to be positive). Then she went on to say that he refused to wear a smock. I tried to explain to her that he has alot of sensory issues (mostly tactile). She just said well he refused and had a tantrum. Then she said that if i was wondering why he wasn't getting a stamp for good behavior that it was because he acted this way. I felt horrible when I left there. It seems like she expects everything to run smooth all the time. Give me a break! I am going to request a conference today. Does anyone have any advice on this matter? I would appreciate any insight. Thanks!
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taless
08-29-2006, 05:28 PM
I would demand an immediate IEP meeting. At the beginning of the meeting state that you are concerned that his teacher is not trained properly on working with autistic children. Give your reasons why and let them know that you are not happy with your child being in a classroom where the teacher is not properly trained. The school is required to have provide your son with a teacher that is trained in working with autistic children and if they can not get her trained immediately than they need to assign him to a class that has a teacher that is already educated in autism.
I would not allow my child to attend class until this is handled, but that is just my way of handling the situation. I have pulled him out of a school completely because I wasn't happy with any of the staf from the Principal down to the teacher. The school board assigned him to a new classroom immediately, and I got final approval. I met with both the teacher and the Principal before agreeing to let him attend.
Parents always have to fight with the school system to get what are children need. It is terrible that we have to do this, but most of our children (especially young ones like my 7yr son who is nonverbal) cannot do it themselves.
Contact your school board and talk with the person who coordinates everything for the autistic children. Inform the teacher in writing as well as verbally that you want an immediate IEP meeting. Inform the Case Manager and Principal in writing too. Put in the letter the reason that you are asking for the meeting and if you have to pull your son out of school until this is resolved put that in the letter too. Pulling your child out of school is a drastic measure and they may say it is illegal, but if your child is being adversally affected by being in that classroom I think you should do it. Assess for yourself whether or not your child is being psychologically affected by what goes on in the classroom due to the teacher's ignorance of autism. There are advocacy groups that you can contact to help you. Each state is different, but you can do a search on the internet for an advocacy group close to you.
Good luck
Tammy
I would not allow my child to attend class until this is handled, but that is just my way of handling the situation. I have pulled him out of a school completely because I wasn't happy with any of the staf from the Principal down to the teacher. The school board assigned him to a new classroom immediately, and I got final approval. I met with both the teacher and the Principal before agreeing to let him attend.
Parents always have to fight with the school system to get what are children need. It is terrible that we have to do this, but most of our children (especially young ones like my 7yr son who is nonverbal) cannot do it themselves.
Contact your school board and talk with the person who coordinates everything for the autistic children. Inform the teacher in writing as well as verbally that you want an immediate IEP meeting. Inform the Case Manager and Principal in writing too. Put in the letter the reason that you are asking for the meeting and if you have to pull your son out of school until this is resolved put that in the letter too. Pulling your child out of school is a drastic measure and they may say it is illegal, but if your child is being adversally affected by being in that classroom I think you should do it. Assess for yourself whether or not your child is being psychologically affected by what goes on in the classroom due to the teacher's ignorance of autism. There are advocacy groups that you can contact to help you. Each state is different, but you can do a search on the internet for an advocacy group close to you.
Good luck
Tammy
Liamsmom
08-29-2006, 05:33 PM
I don't have advice but I'd have a hard time not placing a good heart felt kick right in the middle of her rearend for being so very insensitive. Has she EVER worked with any children who have autism because it sounds to me like she needs a refresher course ASAP. I'm sorry she made you feel so bad. I'm born and rised in NYC so I'm a big mouth so I have to say you have major patience and manners I'd have handled it much differently most likely ending with school security escorted off the school property. But I only get that way when it comes to my son. Talk to administration and let them know about it.
Good luck and remember change is always much harder for autistic kids but your son will adjust it'll get better.
Good luck and remember change is always much harder for autistic kids but your son will adjust it'll get better.
jakey
08-30-2006, 12:40 AM
Thank you taless and liamsmom! I appreciate your advice and words of encouragement. It is so nice to be able to hear from other parents who live with some of the same issues. I guess I needed that boost of confidence to keep moving in the right direction. Thanks again!
Picali
08-30-2006, 02:32 AM
Jakey,
I hope you get this resolved soon. We should all be given medals - not for dealing with our kids but for dealing with the fools paid to care for them! Tammy's absolutely right, this needs to be dealt with swiftly and decisively.
Liamsmom, your post is the first thing that's made me laugh in days!! I am just like you - I have decided to homeschool now, partly because my boy just can't cope with mainstream but also to stop me from ending up on an assault charge the next time some ******* displays the skills and professionalism of an earthworm! Like you, I'm only like it around my boy. I used to be quite nice, but two and a half years of dealing with the system has knocked that right out of me!
I hope you get this resolved soon. We should all be given medals - not for dealing with our kids but for dealing with the fools paid to care for them! Tammy's absolutely right, this needs to be dealt with swiftly and decisively.
Liamsmom, your post is the first thing that's made me laugh in days!! I am just like you - I have decided to homeschool now, partly because my boy just can't cope with mainstream but also to stop me from ending up on an assault charge the next time some ******* displays the skills and professionalism of an earthworm! Like you, I'm only like it around my boy. I used to be quite nice, but two and a half years of dealing with the system has knocked that right out of me!
Liamsmom
08-30-2006, 09:37 AM
There has been days where I've had to stop myself from smackin someone else's little snot nose kid in the playground for not having manners with my son. What's left of the challenge with my son is his physical delays so when he does something in the play ground it's a big deal and the other day he managed to climb the ladder and slide down the slide which has been a source of major fear. So he did it himself and called out to me "Mama look I did it I did it and I wasn't scared" and Iwas yelling way to go your my hero and this group of boys who were a few years older said so what big deal and I felt so hurt for my son who was standing there looking confused because it was a big deal for us. When they passed by I muttered under my breathe "Little f***** snot bags!!!" and once again felt like kickin them right in their little behinds. Crazy perhaps but just so fed up with insensitive people.
9CatMom
08-30-2006, 10:57 AM
I'm beginning to think that I was almost better off going to school in the days where these issues weren't even publicized. More publicity doesn't necessarily translate into better understanding, I've noticed. At least my teachers, for the most part, recognized my intelligence. My main problems were with the other kids at school.
Liam's Mom,
That was super insensitive. I think being made fun of is bad, but having your achievements downgraded is even worse.
Liam's Mom,
That was super insensitive. I think being made fun of is bad, but having your achievements downgraded is even worse.
9CatMom
08-30-2006, 10:59 AM
I'm beginning to think that I was almost better off going to school in the days where these issues weren't even publicized. More publicity doesn't necessarily translate into better understanding, I've noticed. At least my teachers, for the most part, recognized my intelligence. My main problems were with the other kids at school.
Liam's Mom,
That was super insensitive. I think being made fun of is bad, but having your achievements downgraded is even worse.
Liam's Mom,
That was super insensitive. I think being made fun of is bad, but having your achievements downgraded is even worse.
9CatMom
08-30-2006, 10:59 AM
I'm beginning to think that I was almost better off going to school in the days where these issues weren't even publicized. More publicity doesn't necessarily translate into better understanding, I've noticed. At least my teachers, for the most part, recognized my intelligence. My main problems were with the other kids at school.
Liam's Mom,
That was super insensitive. I think being made fun of is bad, but having your achievements downgraded is even worse.
Liam's Mom,
That was super insensitive. I think being made fun of is bad, but having your achievements downgraded is even worse.
te34resa
09-10-2006, 12:57 PM
Hieveryone, it's my first post to this forum but I felt I had to contribute to this topic. I don't have an autistic child but have been working with one on the Sonrise Programme at his home for four years and this week began supporting him at his school. Here in the UK I think it's quite usual for teachers to have no prior experience of autism. Ciaron's parents have had tons of problems with his school and that's why they asked if I'd support him as I know him so well- hope I'm up to the job!- his teacher obviously has little understanding as his report said things like "still needs adult support a lot of the time"- can you believe it? Of course he needs support, he's autistic! When there was an incident where he kicked at a teacher- he has involuntary kicking and flapping- they called it "deliberate". His mother went to another school to speak to the headteacher about him going there and mentioned this tendancy and was told if it happened at her school he would be excluded! The truth is, schools have to be seen to take special needs children but often have no idea what to do with them or what resources they need. I know I'm not in for an easy ride at the school but will do whatever I can.