Hi Everyone,

Just wanted to touch base and let all know the latest on myself and mom.
For a few weeks now I just wasnt able to visit the post's and read one more line about AD. I've just tried to get through the days and let my body become adjusted to the med's they now have me on. I literally went without sleep for days and ended up getting sick and DH calling an ambulance at three in the morning only to find out I was having a severe panic attack (which I have never had before ) he thought I was having a heart attack and frankley so did I ( really scared me ). The next day he took me to the doctor and they started me on med. and my counseling starts sept. 14 and I guess the reality of it all frightened me enough to make me finally want to think about myself besides just mom 24/7. Work has also been stressful lately and my youngest son who's in third year of college has been worrying me some so you all know the story.... Anyway, Im beginning to finally get some quality sleep without feeling so horrible the next morning. LUNESTA it does work just takes about a week to get in your system well. Also the mood stabilizers are helping me at least Im able to function better and stay pretty even minded.
Mom has been having a hard time lately, seems to be more aggresive on some days and has learned the color of her pills now so literally it is taking them sometimes three hours to get her morning meds in her. I considered moving her closer to us but they are so good to her and we know them all by name now and mom even knows some of the girls by name and remembers them. Plus the director of our AD support group here had her mom in the NH here and they held her down to give her a halodol shot (not sure how to spell that) but anyway her mom became aggresive in the shower they held her down gave her the shot and she went into a semi-coma never recovered and layed comatose for three years. The sad part was they didnt even call the family before they gave her the shot. Even though mom is thirty mins. away I feel fortunate they check with us before making changes even if the doctor orders something they clear it through us first. This journey is so long and sometimes I feel so tuckered out by it. ( I KNOW YOU ALL FEEL THE SAME WAY ) My prayers are with everyone and I will try to stay in touch better. First week of October Im going with DH on a buisness trip to Tampa Bay looking forward to that for a whole week.... Good thoughts to all.
jess

Dearest Jess,

It doesn't surprise me that your body finally took over and said in very loud words

STOP

Bodies are VERY good at making you listen to them sometimes, and I guess you discovered that.

Jess, it's OK to slow down. It's OK to take time out to yourself. It's OK to tell son he's being a pain in the a**e (still doing that with mine btw) it's OK NOT to be SUPERWOMAN .. !!!!

Ok .. lecture over ... :D

Here is a big cyberhug for you and go away with hubby and take some time out for both of you. Counselling will help let you vent and search for some peace of mind .. I think your still feeling some guilt about placing Mum (I know I am, but I don't BLAME myself anymore) and that's why your body went into Shut Down .. time to reassess everything and get your priorities back in line ...

Peace my friend ... it will happen

:angel:

Dear Jess,

I've missed you and wondered where you are.

Sorry you got sick - it really is just as Sally says, our bodies can take just so much stress and then they go on strike. Get well soon, and be happy your Mom is in a safe place. She will be fine. I would let her stay there since you know it's a good place. Don't go to see her that much. And DO tell them NOT to call for every little thing. Who needs to hear Your Mom is angry today? Deal with it, you should say!

Take it easy!

love,

Martha

Hi Miss Jess,

I am glad that you are getting some help from others for yourself!!! It is just a shame that it took that much to let you know that that was as far as you could go and as much as you could take!

Try not to worry too much about your mom. Let the home where she is living take care of that. Just take some times out of the days for you. Just you. I have to sometimes, just talk to myself and say breathe, breathe, slow down and what ever it is can be done by someone else or another day... By the way, I take pills to help me be able to cope with my mom, dad and FIL.

We just need to get to the exercise part! Like walking or yoga or water aerobics.

Take care of yourself and do tell the care home not too call you except for the most very important things.

Love, Wannabe

How did I ever miss this thread???:confused:

Jess, I'm so happy to hear you're taking steps to get yourself well. I'm sorry though that it took an episode so severe and at such an ungodly hour to get you the help you needed.

Stress can do such strange things to us, can't it?

You take care of yourself first. You'll have a clearer mind then to take care of the rest later. Once you're feeling well and rested, you may even find that some of the things you think you need to take care of are things that lie on someone else's mess for them to clean up, not you. That alone can be a huge weight lifted off of your shoulders.

Big cyberhugs to you!!!

Love, Barb