boxerlover227
09-01-2006, 04:01 PM
wave: Hello to everyone who decided this topic would have been of interest to you.
I decided to sit down and write about my disease, anxiety with panic disorder. So many of us here question whether or not we are alone in what we are feeling. So many of us question whether or not these are indeed symptoms of anxiety. We tell ourselves yeah I have been alittle stressed out lately but not enough to cause all these horrible physical symptoms I am experiencing. Or is it enough? My only interest in writing this is in hopes to find others out there who maybe suffers as well and perhaps "think they are alone" and maybe come to realize they are not and find some comfort in knowing this. Or perhaps you are reading this saying to yourself, boy I know how that person feels I have been down that road more than once and offer some support or advice to others on things that may or may not have helped you. I must note that everything I write today is real life experiences that I myself have had. Nothing is taken out of a text book or off of any website or documentary. They are real feelings, real symptoms, and real daily struggles. Also I must add if you are looking for a short read, this post is also not for you, as I mentioned this is years of struggles and years could not be summed up in two sentences. My true goal in writing this is to possibly help others including myself, or perhaps find or give comfort in others as well.
So everyone knows that feeling you are on an airplane and dropping altitude, you feel a falling sensation from within, it almost causes you to reach for those nice bags they offer you cause your stomach begins to feel queasy, or your in an elevator and you are going up or down, and again you are struck with that dropping, falling sensation. Only thing is you know you are not on an airplane or in an elevator you are sitting at your desk at work, or reading the paper at home, or perhaps just cooking dinner in your kitchen going about your day. So what just happened? Your mind starts going on overdrive, Did I just have a stroke? I am having a heart attack that must be it? You begin to Have hot and cold flashes, you feel pins and needles all over, your heart rate starts to speed up, your chest is hurting cause your heart is pounding so hard, you feel like you can't catch your breath, a smothering sensation, like a pillow being placed over your face, you feel the urge to crawl out of your body and run, but where? Where is your safe place? Your head feel so heavy like you just had a mask of funny gas placed over your face Your legs can't possibly hold you up anymore they are so weak and shaky, you know you are going to pass out at any moment, BUT you don't so now what?
Your in the grocery store, already you are having a hard time focusing and walking down the aisle without falling over, so you fingers are gripped to the cart for balance purposes. You approached the check out and suddenly you feel hot and cold all over, your starting to feel like you might pass out or perhaps go crazy. everyone's voices become much louder but for some strange reason you can't understand what they are saying, the fluorescent lights seemed intensely bright, you knees start to feel that shakiness you know all so well. You suddenly have the urge to leave and run to that safe place again, the sheer terror is beyond anything you could control. You shove your cart to the side inspite the need for food, and run as fast as you can out of the store. You wonder to yourself, again what just happened? Your still feeling the effects of panic. Your trembling fumbling for your keys, your still trying to catch your breath, driving away for the store approaching your home you begin to feel your heart rate slowing down. Why is this happening? I feel like I am losing my mind. Realistically I know that there was no reason for fear, but why does my body and mind seem to think there is? Suddenly, for no immediate reason, my body was overwhelmed by a surge of elemental panic. Everything seems to race out of control, I could feel my vision go off, everything faded out and became detached, and my heart felt like it wanted to jump out of my chest. Is this just panic and anxiety or is there really something physically wrong with me? There has to be something wrong, I know there is.. These are all the thoughts that follow hours, and days, and weeks after.. Which trigger the feelings all over again. Like a spinning wheel just keeps going around and around. But how do you over come this? I know next time I will breath better, I will tell myself over and over again that there is nothing to fear, I will handle it better next time....
Next time Your driving along singing to your favorite song, suddenly you are stopped at a red light, A red light that seems like an eternity to change to green, suddenly this overwhelming fear comes over you, your breathing starts to become fast and shallow, the song you were just singing along to begins to sound distorted, your beginning to feel detached, your trembling so hard you can hear your teeth chattering, your chest is hurting, your heart is pounding, you start to feel your vision blur, Your lightheaded and just know at any moment you are going to pass out.
I have to get out, those are the thoughts running through your head, You begin to feel like everything around you is closing in. You are sure this time that you are dying. The light turns green, you proceed with traffic, suddenly you are struck with a intense headache, pressure feeling to be exact.
Your still feeling the effects of what your body just went through, You keep asking yourself what just happened, If I only could make it home I will be okay. You pull up to your house and you feel a sense of being safe. You spend hours, feeling the effects of fear, terror and adrenaline that just raced through your body. You ask your self why? You would think by now your body was so use to the surges, But in fact each and everytime the feelings and symptoms are just as strong as if you were experiencing them for the first time... Again you promise your self next time I will handle it better.
You begin to research... And research and yup you guessed it you have every single symptom or every single disease out there. You begin to obsess and believe you are plagued with everyone of these illnesses, and this in turn causes you to obsess about it day in and day out. You wake up feeling sick and go to bed feeling sick. You experience every symptom form a chronic rapid heart rate, to chills and hot flashes, upset stomach, headaches, dizziness, disattachment from yourself, even disappointment in yourself.
You stop doing all the things you once loved and enjoyed. Everything you do has become a major challenge to this beast. You start to feel as if your life is not in your control anymore. You can't control these feelings, you have tried over and over again.. You simply feel like you are going to die at the hands of this beast. BUT you don't.. You continue to live in a vicious cycle of fear, and terror along with an array of symptoms that are horrific.
There are so many treatments out there for suffers just like myself. There are medications, therapies, and most of all support groups such as this one that can help others to feel comfort in knowing that they are not by any means alone. I feel that this is the most effective for me, speaking to others who know what it feels like first hand, who understands your daily struggle, offers you support and comfort when perhaps you can't find that in the one's you spend most of your days with. My sole purpose today is to offer that support, share my terror of anxiety disorder with you all and hope that somebody out there reads this and finds some kind of comfort... Believe me feeling alone in this makes everything more of a challenge.
I must mention that there are illnesses that mimic anxiety as well as trigger anxiety, so proper diagnosis is important, Once you are diagnosed and know you suffer from some sort of anxiety disorder, The Rest OF the Battle is excepting the fact that this really is anxiety!!!
I hope reading this has help many of you. I know writing it has helped me some.. Still I continue to battle my daily struggle with anxiety disease and panic disorder.
My thoughts and prayers go out to all you suffers such as myself.
Everyone feel free to comment on this post, perhaps your experiences could help others as well... As always my best to all... :angel: Boxerlover
I decided to sit down and write about my disease, anxiety with panic disorder. So many of us here question whether or not we are alone in what we are feeling. So many of us question whether or not these are indeed symptoms of anxiety. We tell ourselves yeah I have been alittle stressed out lately but not enough to cause all these horrible physical symptoms I am experiencing. Or is it enough? My only interest in writing this is in hopes to find others out there who maybe suffers as well and perhaps "think they are alone" and maybe come to realize they are not and find some comfort in knowing this. Or perhaps you are reading this saying to yourself, boy I know how that person feels I have been down that road more than once and offer some support or advice to others on things that may or may not have helped you. I must note that everything I write today is real life experiences that I myself have had. Nothing is taken out of a text book or off of any website or documentary. They are real feelings, real symptoms, and real daily struggles. Also I must add if you are looking for a short read, this post is also not for you, as I mentioned this is years of struggles and years could not be summed up in two sentences. My true goal in writing this is to possibly help others including myself, or perhaps find or give comfort in others as well.
So everyone knows that feeling you are on an airplane and dropping altitude, you feel a falling sensation from within, it almost causes you to reach for those nice bags they offer you cause your stomach begins to feel queasy, or your in an elevator and you are going up or down, and again you are struck with that dropping, falling sensation. Only thing is you know you are not on an airplane or in an elevator you are sitting at your desk at work, or reading the paper at home, or perhaps just cooking dinner in your kitchen going about your day. So what just happened? Your mind starts going on overdrive, Did I just have a stroke? I am having a heart attack that must be it? You begin to Have hot and cold flashes, you feel pins and needles all over, your heart rate starts to speed up, your chest is hurting cause your heart is pounding so hard, you feel like you can't catch your breath, a smothering sensation, like a pillow being placed over your face, you feel the urge to crawl out of your body and run, but where? Where is your safe place? Your head feel so heavy like you just had a mask of funny gas placed over your face Your legs can't possibly hold you up anymore they are so weak and shaky, you know you are going to pass out at any moment, BUT you don't so now what?
Your in the grocery store, already you are having a hard time focusing and walking down the aisle without falling over, so you fingers are gripped to the cart for balance purposes. You approached the check out and suddenly you feel hot and cold all over, your starting to feel like you might pass out or perhaps go crazy. everyone's voices become much louder but for some strange reason you can't understand what they are saying, the fluorescent lights seemed intensely bright, you knees start to feel that shakiness you know all so well. You suddenly have the urge to leave and run to that safe place again, the sheer terror is beyond anything you could control. You shove your cart to the side inspite the need for food, and run as fast as you can out of the store. You wonder to yourself, again what just happened? Your still feeling the effects of panic. Your trembling fumbling for your keys, your still trying to catch your breath, driving away for the store approaching your home you begin to feel your heart rate slowing down. Why is this happening? I feel like I am losing my mind. Realistically I know that there was no reason for fear, but why does my body and mind seem to think there is? Suddenly, for no immediate reason, my body was overwhelmed by a surge of elemental panic. Everything seems to race out of control, I could feel my vision go off, everything faded out and became detached, and my heart felt like it wanted to jump out of my chest. Is this just panic and anxiety or is there really something physically wrong with me? There has to be something wrong, I know there is.. These are all the thoughts that follow hours, and days, and weeks after.. Which trigger the feelings all over again. Like a spinning wheel just keeps going around and around. But how do you over come this? I know next time I will breath better, I will tell myself over and over again that there is nothing to fear, I will handle it better next time....
Next time Your driving along singing to your favorite song, suddenly you are stopped at a red light, A red light that seems like an eternity to change to green, suddenly this overwhelming fear comes over you, your breathing starts to become fast and shallow, the song you were just singing along to begins to sound distorted, your beginning to feel detached, your trembling so hard you can hear your teeth chattering, your chest is hurting, your heart is pounding, you start to feel your vision blur, Your lightheaded and just know at any moment you are going to pass out.
I have to get out, those are the thoughts running through your head, You begin to feel like everything around you is closing in. You are sure this time that you are dying. The light turns green, you proceed with traffic, suddenly you are struck with a intense headache, pressure feeling to be exact.
Your still feeling the effects of what your body just went through, You keep asking yourself what just happened, If I only could make it home I will be okay. You pull up to your house and you feel a sense of being safe. You spend hours, feeling the effects of fear, terror and adrenaline that just raced through your body. You ask your self why? You would think by now your body was so use to the surges, But in fact each and everytime the feelings and symptoms are just as strong as if you were experiencing them for the first time... Again you promise your self next time I will handle it better.
You begin to research... And research and yup you guessed it you have every single symptom or every single disease out there. You begin to obsess and believe you are plagued with everyone of these illnesses, and this in turn causes you to obsess about it day in and day out. You wake up feeling sick and go to bed feeling sick. You experience every symptom form a chronic rapid heart rate, to chills and hot flashes, upset stomach, headaches, dizziness, disattachment from yourself, even disappointment in yourself.
You stop doing all the things you once loved and enjoyed. Everything you do has become a major challenge to this beast. You start to feel as if your life is not in your control anymore. You can't control these feelings, you have tried over and over again.. You simply feel like you are going to die at the hands of this beast. BUT you don't.. You continue to live in a vicious cycle of fear, and terror along with an array of symptoms that are horrific.
There are so many treatments out there for suffers just like myself. There are medications, therapies, and most of all support groups such as this one that can help others to feel comfort in knowing that they are not by any means alone. I feel that this is the most effective for me, speaking to others who know what it feels like first hand, who understands your daily struggle, offers you support and comfort when perhaps you can't find that in the one's you spend most of your days with. My sole purpose today is to offer that support, share my terror of anxiety disorder with you all and hope that somebody out there reads this and finds some kind of comfort... Believe me feeling alone in this makes everything more of a challenge.
I must mention that there are illnesses that mimic anxiety as well as trigger anxiety, so proper diagnosis is important, Once you are diagnosed and know you suffer from some sort of anxiety disorder, The Rest OF the Battle is excepting the fact that this really is anxiety!!!
I hope reading this has help many of you. I know writing it has helped me some.. Still I continue to battle my daily struggle with anxiety disease and panic disorder.
My thoughts and prayers go out to all you suffers such as myself.
Everyone feel free to comment on this post, perhaps your experiences could help others as well... As always my best to all... :angel: Boxerlover
Sponsor
Chat_Noir
09-01-2006, 05:02 PM
My life in your words!;)
sponsoredbynobody
09-01-2006, 05:16 PM
Yeah, especially the driving and the music experience...wow.
Amy D.J.
09-01-2006, 06:09 PM
Thank You So Much!! you just explained my panic disorder and the way it feels in complete detail, it is so good to know that I and others are not alone in our everyday struggle the only other thing I would add is it also puts stress on our families and you feel as though you are letting them down and you do not know how to stop it and that it also scares them too, I know I felt like that when it was my husbend and especially my children seeing the way this effects me and my every day life, it stinks!! Amy J.
nikigrl8883
09-01-2006, 08:35 PM
thank you boxer you know i understand what your saying completely and i thank you for responding to my other threads you give good advice... i actually feel the pressure thing in my head right now and do everyday
some of its from my other problem too i think i dont know but it makes me feel better knowing other people have similar issues....i dont do things now becasue of this illness i was so outgoing before now im like a recluse my friend was suppose to come by today and i made up and excuse for her not to come in case i get sick tonight like i do everynight i use to go out to clubs bars now i do nothing i have no boyfriend anymore, no job,no life
some of its from my other problem too i think i dont know but it makes me feel better knowing other people have similar issues....i dont do things now becasue of this illness i was so outgoing before now im like a recluse my friend was suppose to come by today and i made up and excuse for her not to come in case i get sick tonight like i do everynight i use to go out to clubs bars now i do nothing i have no boyfriend anymore, no job,no life
Icy
09-01-2006, 09:32 PM
I think everyone here will agree that that is what life with anxiety seems like.
I also agree talking about it with other people who understand help relieve the anxiety which in why everyone of my posts I will always give the example of what I am saying with something I do. Definately sounds self-centered but it helps me and hopefully helps the person I am saying it to since they know that another person experienced it.;)
Good post
I also agree talking about it with other people who understand help relieve the anxiety which in why everyone of my posts I will always give the example of what I am saying with something I do. Definately sounds self-centered but it helps me and hopefully helps the person I am saying it to since they know that another person experienced it.;)
Good post
toxxct
09-02-2006, 08:30 AM
Boxer i totally appreciate the effort you put into the post. I was feeling a bit blah this afternoon due in part to a crappy sleep last night because of a 4 am panic wakeup call lol. Every day i feel like i'm getting closer and closer to killing this pig off for good. However there are peaks and valley's with this struggle so i try to focus on the good moments as they are what get me through my next valley :)
In any event you nailed alot of how i feel with the grocery store experience (not all the time) as well the detachment...god i hate it when that happens.
The thing i'm having the most trouble with is the fact that my wife is really freaked out when i try to talk to her about what i'm going through. She is supportive to a certain point - she thinks great i'm married to a loon or something... I've decided to not talk to her about it anymore, my next step if i don't lick this myself (as i have done in the past) is to seek help from a professional.
All i know is it is nice and comforting to hear people pass on their experiences as it is what keeps me going.
In any event you nailed alot of how i feel with the grocery store experience (not all the time) as well the detachment...god i hate it when that happens.
The thing i'm having the most trouble with is the fact that my wife is really freaked out when i try to talk to her about what i'm going through. She is supportive to a certain point - she thinks great i'm married to a loon or something... I've decided to not talk to her about it anymore, my next step if i don't lick this myself (as i have done in the past) is to seek help from a professional.
All i know is it is nice and comforting to hear people pass on their experiences as it is what keeps me going.
boxerlover227
09-02-2006, 06:26 PM
Thank you all for the interest in my post. :wave:
I am happy to see I was able to offer support as well as gain support, from many of you.
Not to my surprise so many of you mention the effect your condition has on the family as well as not getting support from a spouse, parent or friends.
So many of us suffer feeling alone, outcaste, and in fear.
"If only my husband would understand exactly what I am feeling" Is a thought that replays like a broken record in my head....
"Just get yourself together, stop thinking so much about it, there's nothing wrong with you" is not what an anxiety suffer like myself needs or wants to hear. Let's face it we would all do just that if only it were that simple.
This kind of "support" is only causing resentment and more anxiety, it actually is hindering the process to recovery. But it's not their fault.. As well as it's not our fault as the sufferer.
We all know that there is great suffering on the family as well as the suffer, They don't understand why your tired all the time, they don't understand how you aren't able to just take control over your fears, Let's face it someone who never experienced the symptoms of some sort of anxiety disorder, can't possibly understand the effects and toll it takes on your daily life.
I think it is only human nature for other to offer sympathy instead of empathy.
I think it is only human nature for your friends to give up on asking you to make plans with them, when time and time again you always decline the invitation, or your spouse is sick of the excuses you make as to why you just don't feel well, or you get that look "here we go again" from them..
What I found to be alittle helpful that I would like to share with you is I tried to educated my husband as much as I possibly could on my condition. I purchased books and read them with him, I had him sit in on therapy sessions to help him better understand my fears, cause let's face it all anxiety stems from some sort of fear, whether it be death, illness, or just plain fear of loosing your mind. Whatever it may be helping them understand is just as important as us as suffers need help in understanding. Don't get me wrong by no means do I feel my family, friends, etc.. totally empathize with what I feel, but when I am in panic mode, there is a better understanding to the "symptoms" I am feeling, which in turn provides comfort to me... No matter what try not to shut the door so to say, to those that are closest to you, Marriages, relationships, and even the best of friendships are put to the test when things are bad. What I do instead is try and find ways to help them better understand. Treat your disorder as if it were the illness it is, If you were a diabetic for example, what would your family do? They would learn and educate themselves as much as they could about your illness, so they can better understand your needs. So what makes this illness any different.
Don't minimize what you suffer from, acceptance is a great starting point to recovery. This is now what I
am starting to do.. accept my fear, accept my symptoms, believe me it's not easy, especially when you are in panic mode. I must also mention Most of all I find comfort in all of you. Finding support from others just like yourself is a gift alone!
I am by no means in my life over this anxiety disease, I still struggle daily with all the symptoms most of you do, but I find offering my support, advice, thoughts, and questions with all of you is just another way of helping me towards my steps to recovery! Thank you all for being so supportive,cheering us up when things seem so blue, making us feel like we are not alone, and most of all for sharing in your stories!
My best as always.. boxerlover:angel:
I am happy to see I was able to offer support as well as gain support, from many of you.
Not to my surprise so many of you mention the effect your condition has on the family as well as not getting support from a spouse, parent or friends.
So many of us suffer feeling alone, outcaste, and in fear.
"If only my husband would understand exactly what I am feeling" Is a thought that replays like a broken record in my head....
"Just get yourself together, stop thinking so much about it, there's nothing wrong with you" is not what an anxiety suffer like myself needs or wants to hear. Let's face it we would all do just that if only it were that simple.
This kind of "support" is only causing resentment and more anxiety, it actually is hindering the process to recovery. But it's not their fault.. As well as it's not our fault as the sufferer.
We all know that there is great suffering on the family as well as the suffer, They don't understand why your tired all the time, they don't understand how you aren't able to just take control over your fears, Let's face it someone who never experienced the symptoms of some sort of anxiety disorder, can't possibly understand the effects and toll it takes on your daily life.
I think it is only human nature for other to offer sympathy instead of empathy.
I think it is only human nature for your friends to give up on asking you to make plans with them, when time and time again you always decline the invitation, or your spouse is sick of the excuses you make as to why you just don't feel well, or you get that look "here we go again" from them..
What I found to be alittle helpful that I would like to share with you is I tried to educated my husband as much as I possibly could on my condition. I purchased books and read them with him, I had him sit in on therapy sessions to help him better understand my fears, cause let's face it all anxiety stems from some sort of fear, whether it be death, illness, or just plain fear of loosing your mind. Whatever it may be helping them understand is just as important as us as suffers need help in understanding. Don't get me wrong by no means do I feel my family, friends, etc.. totally empathize with what I feel, but when I am in panic mode, there is a better understanding to the "symptoms" I am feeling, which in turn provides comfort to me... No matter what try not to shut the door so to say, to those that are closest to you, Marriages, relationships, and even the best of friendships are put to the test when things are bad. What I do instead is try and find ways to help them better understand. Treat your disorder as if it were the illness it is, If you were a diabetic for example, what would your family do? They would learn and educate themselves as much as they could about your illness, so they can better understand your needs. So what makes this illness any different.
Don't minimize what you suffer from, acceptance is a great starting point to recovery. This is now what I
am starting to do.. accept my fear, accept my symptoms, believe me it's not easy, especially when you are in panic mode. I must also mention Most of all I find comfort in all of you. Finding support from others just like yourself is a gift alone!
I am by no means in my life over this anxiety disease, I still struggle daily with all the symptoms most of you do, but I find offering my support, advice, thoughts, and questions with all of you is just another way of helping me towards my steps to recovery! Thank you all for being so supportive,cheering us up when things seem so blue, making us feel like we are not alone, and most of all for sharing in your stories!
My best as always.. boxerlover:angel:
Amy D.J.
09-02-2006, 10:47 PM
Boxerlover, Thank You for that great post and for making us all feel less alone, it is posts like this that gives me faith and encouragement that someday I will beat Panic Disorder I Hate It so much, but I know I am not alone in this fight and it is very comforting your words mean so much to us all! thanks Again!! Amy J.:wave:
boxerlover227
09-02-2006, 11:35 PM
Hi Amy D.J.:wave:
You are very welcome! Never loose faith in yourself, You will one day see, as I hope to also see that this shall make you stronger.. You will over come this journey, and along the way you will gain an inner strength you never knew existed... That is my goal as well. I agree panic disorder is a horrible disorder, and one who is a sufferer is the one's who know best. I myself have been a suffer for quite sometime now.. I know what you are going through and I am always here for support I truly understand.. Boxerlover
You are very welcome! Never loose faith in yourself, You will one day see, as I hope to also see that this shall make you stronger.. You will over come this journey, and along the way you will gain an inner strength you never knew existed... That is my goal as well. I agree panic disorder is a horrible disorder, and one who is a sufferer is the one's who know best. I myself have been a suffer for quite sometime now.. I know what you are going through and I am always here for support I truly understand.. Boxerlover
bubbleegum2
09-03-2006, 05:36 AM
well on reading this my numbness in my lips and dizziness went away... i have suffered the same symptoms for almost a year now and its awful, its ruining my life,and like u said about being safe i always am indoors when i feel this way as im petrified in shops in case i have a heart attack etc which is just my anxiety taking over. thanx so much for writing that it meant im not alone and not the only one to get these feelings. im new to this site and have found it so good xxx hope your having a nice weekend take care xx
boxerlover227
09-03-2006, 06:02 PM
Hi Bubbleegum2 :wave:
I am so happy my post was able to make you feel alittle better..
I know what you are going through, so please know you are not alone..
Fear of a heartattack is very common with panic disorder.
Panic attacks strike us so suddenly and the symptoms are so intense and so real, that are minds always jump right to "yup this is a heart attack" Or
" I know I am having a stroke", My mind and fears process panic attacks the same exact way.. I struggle throughout the day, waiting for the next attack, This is called anticipation anxiety.. And what this means is I actually bring alot of symptoms on by being worried about the next attack.. This is also a VERY common thing that people with panic disorder do..
I understand you fears for leaving the house, You mind makes you "think" if I leave my "safe" place something horrible is going to happen.. It's a vicious cycle.. But the good news is you are not alone, and there is treatment for this disorder.. If I could be of any help to you please feel free to ask!
My best to you! Boxerlover:angel:
I am so happy my post was able to make you feel alittle better..
I know what you are going through, so please know you are not alone..
Fear of a heartattack is very common with panic disorder.
Panic attacks strike us so suddenly and the symptoms are so intense and so real, that are minds always jump right to "yup this is a heart attack" Or
" I know I am having a stroke", My mind and fears process panic attacks the same exact way.. I struggle throughout the day, waiting for the next attack, This is called anticipation anxiety.. And what this means is I actually bring alot of symptoms on by being worried about the next attack.. This is also a VERY common thing that people with panic disorder do..
I understand you fears for leaving the house, You mind makes you "think" if I leave my "safe" place something horrible is going to happen.. It's a vicious cycle.. But the good news is you are not alone, and there is treatment for this disorder.. If I could be of any help to you please feel free to ask!
My best to you! Boxerlover:angel:
ejessup1
09-03-2006, 07:44 PM
This is my life exactly! Thank you!
Amy D.J.
09-03-2006, 08:06 PM
BoxerLover, I was told that I bring on panic symptoms myself, but did not know there was an actual thing called anticipation either now that I know this I will try not to think about the symptoms so Much maybe it will help, Thank You for that information, I wish somebody would have told me before it might have helped.Amy J.:)
Icy
09-03-2006, 08:22 PM
Yeah, it's possible to bring anxiety attacks on by worrying about them. Think of it this way, anxiety is normal and EVERYONE has it wether it be from talking in front of a group of people to having a speeding car running right for you. Without the adrenaline from it we wouldn't really be able to react in time to get out of the way of a speeding car. So anxiety is produced naturally from worrying or being in a dangerous or thought to be dangerous position.
Well, once you have anxiety attacks and are worrying about when it will happen and how bad the pain will be any little thing can make you have one. It could be as simple as a headache to something like noticing you have a little trouble breathing.
So the constant worrying can make you prone to thinking any little thing being deadly (being a hypocondriac).
There is no way to entirely just forget about anxiety one day it will be a long process but hey it'd be worth it wouldn't it. You will notice they will happen a lot less frequently but to completely eliminate them will take time.
Well, once you have anxiety attacks and are worrying about when it will happen and how bad the pain will be any little thing can make you have one. It could be as simple as a headache to something like noticing you have a little trouble breathing.
So the constant worrying can make you prone to thinking any little thing being deadly (being a hypocondriac).
There is no way to entirely just forget about anxiety one day it will be a long process but hey it'd be worth it wouldn't it. You will notice they will happen a lot less frequently but to completely eliminate them will take time.
eelsgirl
09-03-2006, 09:26 PM
Boxerlover......What can I say. Reading your story brought me to tears. Just to know that someone else experiencing the same dramas as me. The things you wrote were almost as if I had written them myself. It described situations i have been in and the way i have felt exactly. Thankyou so much for sharing you story. I'm sure it has made many people out there, (including myself) feel they are not alone. Cheers and best of luck to all. XX:angel:
boxerlover227
09-03-2006, 09:49 PM
Hi Amy D.J. :wave:
I was diagnosed as having a Hypervigilant personality, What this means is I notice danger everywhere, and then I obsess about it until it intensifies into fear.. For example.. Most are afraid to go to the dentist, but not to the point where they can't sleep nights before the appointment because they are so terrified by the fear. What is the fear? Well maybe I will have a panic attack while sitting in the chair, or maybe I will feel dizzy and pass out, I am ANTICIPATING THE FEAR before the appointment even happens.."Apprehension of FEAR", In turn this is creating symptoms of panic. You had a panic attack at the grocery store, so everytime you need to go shopping you start to anticipate the fear of having another attack, before you even get to the store you created yourself the symptoms of panic by anticipating "WHAT MIGHT have happened"
It's a Horrible cycle... Half the time you wouldn't of even have had the panic attack if it wasn't for the anticipation..
So here you are stuck in the cycle worrying all the time when will the next attack strike, meanwhile you are feeling all the symptoms already!
Does this make sense? Positive reinforcement is what you must give yourself to help over come this vicious cycle. Still today I struggle with this anticipation of WHAT might happen.. It is a very hard condition to beat, when you have a very hyper personality, but I made a promise to myself that I shall over come this, and come out stronger then ever imagined!!
I hope this was helpful to you!
Boxerlover:angel:
I was diagnosed as having a Hypervigilant personality, What this means is I notice danger everywhere, and then I obsess about it until it intensifies into fear.. For example.. Most are afraid to go to the dentist, but not to the point where they can't sleep nights before the appointment because they are so terrified by the fear. What is the fear? Well maybe I will have a panic attack while sitting in the chair, or maybe I will feel dizzy and pass out, I am ANTICIPATING THE FEAR before the appointment even happens.."Apprehension of FEAR", In turn this is creating symptoms of panic. You had a panic attack at the grocery store, so everytime you need to go shopping you start to anticipate the fear of having another attack, before you even get to the store you created yourself the symptoms of panic by anticipating "WHAT MIGHT have happened"
It's a Horrible cycle... Half the time you wouldn't of even have had the panic attack if it wasn't for the anticipation..
So here you are stuck in the cycle worrying all the time when will the next attack strike, meanwhile you are feeling all the symptoms already!
Does this make sense? Positive reinforcement is what you must give yourself to help over come this vicious cycle. Still today I struggle with this anticipation of WHAT might happen.. It is a very hard condition to beat, when you have a very hyper personality, but I made a promise to myself that I shall over come this, and come out stronger then ever imagined!!
I hope this was helpful to you!
Boxerlover:angel:
boxerlover227
09-03-2006, 10:45 PM
Hello eelsgirl:wave:
What can I say.. I am so touched that my story brought you tears.. "Tears OF COMFORT" That was my main goal in sitting down and writting exaclty how I feel.. To let others no they ARE NOT ALONE!!
There are so many of us that suffer in silence, thinking we are the only one's, going about our day trying to feel normal, making others believe that we aren't suffering. When the truth is behind the smiles, lies fear, terror, confusion, and frustration, along with disappointment. We are scared to tell others what we feel in FEAR that they just won't understand..
I feel it it's important for us to be honest with ourselves, don't minimize what we feel, and most of all surround ourselves around others who truly understand. Talking is important in the process to recovery. Treat your Disorder for the illness it truly is.. I am touched by all the support I have gained as well as offered! My best to you in your road to recovery from this Diesease called anxiety. If I can help you in anyway I am here to offer support! (Hugs) Boxerlover:angel:
What can I say.. I am so touched that my story brought you tears.. "Tears OF COMFORT" That was my main goal in sitting down and writting exaclty how I feel.. To let others no they ARE NOT ALONE!!
There are so many of us that suffer in silence, thinking we are the only one's, going about our day trying to feel normal, making others believe that we aren't suffering. When the truth is behind the smiles, lies fear, terror, confusion, and frustration, along with disappointment. We are scared to tell others what we feel in FEAR that they just won't understand..
I feel it it's important for us to be honest with ourselves, don't minimize what we feel, and most of all surround ourselves around others who truly understand. Talking is important in the process to recovery. Treat your Disorder for the illness it truly is.. I am touched by all the support I have gained as well as offered! My best to you in your road to recovery from this Diesease called anxiety. If I can help you in anyway I am here to offer support! (Hugs) Boxerlover:angel:
featherweight
09-04-2006, 01:28 PM
All I can say is WOW WOW WOW. Thank you so much for sharing this. Yes, I have GAD and have for most of my life. It really got out of control when I got an inner ear infection that had me so dizzy for months on end that I could barely function. I was put on Ativan to help "clean up" the dizzies and to control the anxiety/panic. Boy, it worked so well and I felt on top of the world. But fast forward 18 mos and I wasn't feeling so good anymore. Depression, apathetic and major brain fog. I tapered off the drug over 17 mos and have been off for 2 mos now. I am back feeling "unbalanced" but handling OK, I guess. I am not anxious about it. My face and eyes are numb now. I've been told this may be a protracted WD symptom from the Ativan or do you suppose it could be another form of anxiety?
What do you guys take, if anything, for your anxiety? I am afraid of the SSRI's and some of the horrible side effects. I did try Lexapro for 1 month and was too sedated during the day to know if it helped or not.
Wishing every a happy, calm, holiday. :wave:
What do you guys take, if anything, for your anxiety? I am afraid of the SSRI's and some of the horrible side effects. I did try Lexapro for 1 month and was too sedated during the day to know if it helped or not.
Wishing every a happy, calm, holiday. :wave:
boxerlover227
09-05-2006, 01:28 AM
Hi Featherweight:wave:
I am happy you found some comfort in my post!
I myself am a vertigo sufferer, which causes me horriable anxiety and panic attacks. I suffer with "subjective vertigo" where I feel the sensation of motion. I could be standing talking to someone and I will feel like I am falling, backwards, sideways, or just feel a floating, or swaying sensation. It is like being on a boat in a storm! I still question whether or not mine is inner ear related as well. I have been a sufferer for quite a few years now, and all the simple things in my life has been a great challange for me with the presence of this vertigo. So many things I once loved and enjoyed I just simply cannot do, and this causes me alot of frustration. I feel I am being held back from so many things I would like to accomplish here on earth, but simply have a hard time doing that with this condition.
You as a vertigo sufferer as well I am sure understands, and can relate to the frustrations. I myself have tried Ativan but it was just to sadating for me. All I wanted to do on it was sleep. The SSRI's did not agree with me as well.
I did give xanax a shot and that seemed to help calm down the vertigo some, but was really benifical for the panic attacks. I often take a xanax still if the dizziness and panic is really bad and I need to function some what half way!!
I also found therapy to be very benifical as well, and suggest this as best treatment of all. Talking about your fears, struggles and illness is the best medicine also being apart of this family (THE BOARD) is a god sent, I have found so much understanding and comfort in suffers just like myself...
I hope you find this helpful in someway, and you as well have a happy and calm holiday! If you have any thoughts or questions I am here to offer my support as well.. All my best Boxerlover:angel:
I am happy you found some comfort in my post!
I myself am a vertigo sufferer, which causes me horriable anxiety and panic attacks. I suffer with "subjective vertigo" where I feel the sensation of motion. I could be standing talking to someone and I will feel like I am falling, backwards, sideways, or just feel a floating, or swaying sensation. It is like being on a boat in a storm! I still question whether or not mine is inner ear related as well. I have been a sufferer for quite a few years now, and all the simple things in my life has been a great challange for me with the presence of this vertigo. So many things I once loved and enjoyed I just simply cannot do, and this causes me alot of frustration. I feel I am being held back from so many things I would like to accomplish here on earth, but simply have a hard time doing that with this condition.
You as a vertigo sufferer as well I am sure understands, and can relate to the frustrations. I myself have tried Ativan but it was just to sadating for me. All I wanted to do on it was sleep. The SSRI's did not agree with me as well.
I did give xanax a shot and that seemed to help calm down the vertigo some, but was really benifical for the panic attacks. I often take a xanax still if the dizziness and panic is really bad and I need to function some what half way!!
I also found therapy to be very benifical as well, and suggest this as best treatment of all. Talking about your fears, struggles and illness is the best medicine also being apart of this family (THE BOARD) is a god sent, I have found so much understanding and comfort in suffers just like myself...
I hope you find this helpful in someway, and you as well have a happy and calm holiday! If you have any thoughts or questions I am here to offer my support as well.. All my best Boxerlover:angel:
dinney
09-06-2006, 10:11 AM
boxerlover227~just read your first post, WOW, how powerful, what a sense of peace that it gave to me reading all that you are going through and knowing/thinking that I am not totally crazy. Each of they symptoms you elaborate on I go through on a daily basis most of the time. I too have been on zanex for years and it takes the edge off when I am having a real bad time. God Bless you and will keep you in my prayers and you do the same for all of us that you have touched with sharing your life. So nice to have someone that "truly" understands what we deal with. :angel:
NVR2L8
09-06-2006, 11:28 AM
This is my situation as well. Off and on meds, irrational fear of nothing and adrenaline rushes. My new thing this bout is clenching and grinding teeth at night......my jaw is hurting quite a bit......Back on meds I go.
Good luck to all with this. It is hard for me to get some people to understand this and what I am going through........:rolleyes:
t~
Good luck to all with this. It is hard for me to get some people to understand this and what I am going through........:rolleyes:
t~
dinney
09-06-2006, 11:42 AM
Can relate to the grinding/clenching of teeth, I have ended up with MAJOR tmj problems which are so bad now there isn't alot they can do and putting up with the pain that causes ALL over your body doesn't help with the anxiety issues at all. Sympathize with you totally. If you can find a good TMJ dentist, get some help before it's too late and you have done major damage to the joints.
Last night was one of my worst in awhile, woke up from deep sleep with heart racing a million miles an hour, scared me to death, when I get REAL frightened I start to sweat a little. Almost woke up husband to take me to the ER but prayed, talked myself through it, took an aspirin (just in case)..of course took me over 2 hours to get back to sleep, SO tired today at work.
Thanks to ALL of you for being friends and caring. :wave:
Last night was one of my worst in awhile, woke up from deep sleep with heart racing a million miles an hour, scared me to death, when I get REAL frightened I start to sweat a little. Almost woke up husband to take me to the ER but prayed, talked myself through it, took an aspirin (just in case)..of course took me over 2 hours to get back to sleep, SO tired today at work.
Thanks to ALL of you for being friends and caring. :wave:
boxerlover227
09-08-2006, 01:33 PM
Hi dinney & nvr2l8 :wave:
I am so happy both of you found some comfort in my post. I know anxiety/panic disorder is such an emotional roller coaster, at least for me it is. Sometimes I am so disappointed in myself that I am having such troubles overcoming my disorder, Then I read your stories and realize that I am not the only one struggling and feeling this way. This brings me so much comfort as well, feeling alone for so long has been just as horrible as the disorder.
I know there are so many others out there who suffer alone, and I wanted them to know that they aren't and that I truly understand their fears as well as their physical symptoms. I myself have "created" a number of horrible illness in my head that I believed I was dying from. The mind can be such a powerful weapon. I am now trying to use that power to create "Positive"
thinking and kill off this beast! It hasn't been easy, I guess the "learn behavior" I have had for so many years is proven itself to be true.
I take a step back from myself and can't believe the control I have lost over my own thoughts. every negative sensation I feel is some horrible death I am about to experience. I hate living like this, In constant fear, unable to enjoy my life the way I want, missing out on so much because of this fear I am living in that my "own" mind created. It's such a vicious cycle, and my heart goes out to everyone who is in the cycle as well.. along the way I will share my thoughts and fears in hopes to help others just like myself..
Thank you again for sharing your struggle with anxiety with me as well. Your words have more comfort, then you can ever imagine! My thoughts & Prayers
Boxerlover:angel:
I am so happy both of you found some comfort in my post. I know anxiety/panic disorder is such an emotional roller coaster, at least for me it is. Sometimes I am so disappointed in myself that I am having such troubles overcoming my disorder, Then I read your stories and realize that I am not the only one struggling and feeling this way. This brings me so much comfort as well, feeling alone for so long has been just as horrible as the disorder.
I know there are so many others out there who suffer alone, and I wanted them to know that they aren't and that I truly understand their fears as well as their physical symptoms. I myself have "created" a number of horrible illness in my head that I believed I was dying from. The mind can be such a powerful weapon. I am now trying to use that power to create "Positive"
thinking and kill off this beast! It hasn't been easy, I guess the "learn behavior" I have had for so many years is proven itself to be true.
I take a step back from myself and can't believe the control I have lost over my own thoughts. every negative sensation I feel is some horrible death I am about to experience. I hate living like this, In constant fear, unable to enjoy my life the way I want, missing out on so much because of this fear I am living in that my "own" mind created. It's such a vicious cycle, and my heart goes out to everyone who is in the cycle as well.. along the way I will share my thoughts and fears in hopes to help others just like myself..
Thank you again for sharing your struggle with anxiety with me as well. Your words have more comfort, then you can ever imagine! My thoughts & Prayers
Boxerlover:angel:
dinney
09-08-2006, 05:54 PM
boxerlover227~
just found time (at work now) to read the threads and the thanks goes to you for sharing your experiences and encouraging all of us that suffer from this demon called anxiety. I try to use the positive attitude but probably not as hard as I should, seems like when I do, there is always, always this little nudge right along with the positive thoughts to bring me down. With people like you to talk with and be encouraged by, maybe someday life will be all that we want it to be.
Have a great week-end and God Bless ! Catch some of you on Monday.:wave:
just found time (at work now) to read the threads and the thanks goes to you for sharing your experiences and encouraging all of us that suffer from this demon called anxiety. I try to use the positive attitude but probably not as hard as I should, seems like when I do, there is always, always this little nudge right along with the positive thoughts to bring me down. With people like you to talk with and be encouraged by, maybe someday life will be all that we want it to be.
Have a great week-end and God Bless ! Catch some of you on Monday.:wave:
sponsoredbynobody
09-08-2006, 06:02 PM
I bought an interesting book yesterday. The guy in it says you have to change your subconscious thoughts (your 'boss') and the way to do that is to go into alpha wave brain cycling and fill your head with positive thoughts. Then you can actually reprogram your mind.
Well let me tell you I did it ONCE and last night I slept straight through 14 hours.
I haven't slept like that in forever and though Ill try not to make it a habit, it sure was great to not wake up at 5 am and be rip roaring ready to run 10 miles.
My anxiety is almost gone too thank goodness. We can do this guys, beat this thing. We've been living in negative land for so long without even realizing it. I know Ive experienced symptoms of anxiety and panic disorder for YEARS, and didn't even know what it was. I just thought it was flashbacks but now I realzie it has a lot to do with my Dad, a lot to do with me holding onto and believeing things people said about me, a LOT to do with very low self-esteem.
Well let me tell you I did it ONCE and last night I slept straight through 14 hours.
I haven't slept like that in forever and though Ill try not to make it a habit, it sure was great to not wake up at 5 am and be rip roaring ready to run 10 miles.
My anxiety is almost gone too thank goodness. We can do this guys, beat this thing. We've been living in negative land for so long without even realizing it. I know Ive experienced symptoms of anxiety and panic disorder for YEARS, and didn't even know what it was. I just thought it was flashbacks but now I realzie it has a lot to do with my Dad, a lot to do with me holding onto and believeing things people said about me, a LOT to do with very low self-esteem.
lottietrotter
09-08-2006, 08:22 PM
I must mention that there are illnesses that mimic anxiety as well as trigger anxiety
like what?
like what?
boxerlover227
09-08-2006, 11:05 PM
Hi lottietrotter:wave:
There are many illness that mimic or cause anxiety, anything from Cardiovascular, to respiratory illness, hormonal, Aural, hematic, and drug related. The illness for each catagory is to much to list. I hope this answers your question from the quote made in my post. Thank you for taking the time to read my post. Boxerlover:)
There are many illness that mimic or cause anxiety, anything from Cardiovascular, to respiratory illness, hormonal, Aural, hematic, and drug related. The illness for each catagory is to much to list. I hope this answers your question from the quote made in my post. Thank you for taking the time to read my post. Boxerlover:)
boxerlover227
09-15-2006, 01:40 AM
Hi All:wave:
I am just checking in to see how you are all doing.
The past few days have been somewhat calm on the anxiety end.. I still feel like I am in constant anticipation mode and I am just waiting for the next full blown panic attack to strike... I am sure most of you can relate. I have been trying to keep myself busy the last few days, which isn't hard with a toddler.. I guess that is why my constant thoughts about my anxieties has been less this week.. Not to much time to focus on myself these past few days, my child has kept me on my toe's with the terrible two's coming on.. I still feel all the symptoms of anxiety even though I am trying not to think about it so much, sometimes I wonder if once you suffer from this disorder will you always be aware and on guard for the next attack...Does the vicious cycle just stay embedded in you forever, because of the fear. A question I ask myself everyday...
I see there are so many new suffers on the anxiety board who are scared, confused and wondering whether or not they are alone in what they are feeling.. I hope they can all find some comfort in all of us, as well as come across this post to see that they truly are not alone.. I was amazed by the comfort and support in all of you as well as the many responses I received. All of your replies have been my medicine and my peace of mind that I am truly not crazy :)
~I will keep posting~ And hope you all will do the same.
~keeping you all in my thoughts ~ as well as my prayers! Boxerlover:angel:
I am just checking in to see how you are all doing.
The past few days have been somewhat calm on the anxiety end.. I still feel like I am in constant anticipation mode and I am just waiting for the next full blown panic attack to strike... I am sure most of you can relate. I have been trying to keep myself busy the last few days, which isn't hard with a toddler.. I guess that is why my constant thoughts about my anxieties has been less this week.. Not to much time to focus on myself these past few days, my child has kept me on my toe's with the terrible two's coming on.. I still feel all the symptoms of anxiety even though I am trying not to think about it so much, sometimes I wonder if once you suffer from this disorder will you always be aware and on guard for the next attack...Does the vicious cycle just stay embedded in you forever, because of the fear. A question I ask myself everyday...
I see there are so many new suffers on the anxiety board who are scared, confused and wondering whether or not they are alone in what they are feeling.. I hope they can all find some comfort in all of us, as well as come across this post to see that they truly are not alone.. I was amazed by the comfort and support in all of you as well as the many responses I received. All of your replies have been my medicine and my peace of mind that I am truly not crazy :)
~I will keep posting~ And hope you all will do the same.
~keeping you all in my thoughts ~ as well as my prayers! Boxerlover:angel:
Moonshowers
09-15-2006, 09:58 AM
OMG!!!!I can't stop crying! This is so me it is scarey!I just got officially diagnosed 4 months ago. but I have been having these problems for years!I think I am losing my mind.I get sudden urges to run away (where ever I am at the time.)Crowds put me into a frenzy...I get nasty.But I can serve a crowd of people no problem. I just can't be part of the crowd. No emotional control.I am in constant fear of death...cancer in particular.Anger rages and binges with alcohol. I say the meanest things to my poor son when I am raging. I hate what this is doing to me. I hate this monster it is making me. I try so hard to control that...it is exhausting. I was abused growing up.I feel like I have turned into my mother. I am 42 years old, mother of one in an unhappy marriage and I hate my life. Most of all I hate myself. I can't remember ever loving myself.The only place I feel good is doing my job. I feel my best there(I kill myself to be perfect there)...but the attacks still ruin that time too.I am on 2 MG diazapam 3X daily. It has calmed my heart rate down...but I still get the attacks.Everyday off...I sit home alone and cry. I feel like I have been mourning my whole life away...for years. Since I was a kid...I personally can't handle much more of this. It's too much.
ms_mod
09-15-2006, 12:17 PM
Just an FYI for everyone.
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*
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Do not post it on this website.
If you are suicidal, get real live help immediately.
Call 1800273TALK for direction to local help, if in the US.
Call your Minister, Rabbi, Priest, parents, friends, hospital or 911 for immediate help.
Talk of suicide is inappropriate for this website. Do not post thoughts of suicide.
Likewise, do not respond to suicide posts. Report them so that the person may get appropriate help.
Ignoring this or any other rule will lead to deletions/editings/suspension of memberships.
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Please feel free to talk about your depression,anxiety, panic disorder, and let members here encourage you or help you with solutions to problems. But, the boards are NOT an appropriate place for discussions or threats to commit suicide, hurt others, or to hurt yourself. Such posts will be reported and will be removed. They are inappropriate here.
If you are suicidal, contact someone immediately. Please don't try to go it alone.
Thank you for your understanding and cooperation.
Ms_Mod
With HealthBoards.com, you never have to feel alone. Get connected and reach out for others' understanding and support. If loneliness has already set in ... reach out and help someone else... or reach out and ask for help.
*
If You Are Suicidal ~
If you want to do away with yourself, seek immediate live help.
Do not post it on this website.
If you are suicidal, get real live help immediately.
Call 1800273TALK for direction to local help, if in the US.
Call your Minister, Rabbi, Priest, parents, friends, hospital or 911 for immediate help.
Talk of suicide is inappropriate for this website. Do not post thoughts of suicide.
Likewise, do not respond to suicide posts. Report them so that the person may get appropriate help.
Ignoring this or any other rule will lead to deletions/editings/suspension of memberships.
*
Please feel free to talk about your depression,anxiety, panic disorder, and let members here encourage you or help you with solutions to problems. But, the boards are NOT an appropriate place for discussions or threats to commit suicide, hurt others, or to hurt yourself. Such posts will be reported and will be removed. They are inappropriate here.
If you are suicidal, contact someone immediately. Please don't try to go it alone.
Thank you for your understanding and cooperation.
Ms_Mod
boxerlover227
10-02-2006, 12:52 AM
Hi Everyone! :wave:
I just wanted to move this post up! I see there are so many new suffers on the anxiety board that feel as if they are alone on their symptoms and struggles. I wanted them to get the chance to see this post hopefully read it
and know that what they are feeling is real~ and most of all that they are not alone! Hope this helps any of you that are new to the board! :)
Any thoughts I am here for support!!!~ Boxerlover :angel:
I just wanted to move this post up! I see there are so many new suffers on the anxiety board that feel as if they are alone on their symptoms and struggles. I wanted them to get the chance to see this post hopefully read it
and know that what they are feeling is real~ and most of all that they are not alone! Hope this helps any of you that are new to the board! :)
Any thoughts I am here for support!!!~ Boxerlover :angel:
boxerlover227
10-05-2006, 12:34 AM
Hi Froggirl :wave:
I am moving this post up for you! I hope you found it helpful.. Any thoughts or questions please feel free to post!! I hope you feel better knowing your not alone.. Boxerlover227:angel:
I am moving this post up for you! I hope you found it helpful.. Any thoughts or questions please feel free to post!! I hope you feel better knowing your not alone.. Boxerlover227:angel:
lolamb
10-05-2006, 03:00 AM
Thanks Boxerlover227.
Wow, for one evening my thoughts of feeling alone in suffering from all of these symptoms of anxiety/panic disorder has gone away. I've been having anxiety for a little over a year now and haven't gone to the doctor about it at all. I'm thinking I should sometime soon because it's affecting my life greatly. I'm having that wirlwind of thoughts and all I can focus on is having anxiety and the anticipation of it, which is giving me a detachment feeling. Feeling detached is a scary feeling. I've always been outgoing and have made lots of friends in the past. Now I try to make many "transactions" with people short and sweet. I see other people laughing and having a good time with their friends and it bothers me ALOT because I miss having that and keep wondering if I'll be that happy and together again.
These past couple of days I've felt like my anxiety has been full throttle. I just moved to Vancouver, WA which is close to where I grew up. I've been living with my boyfriend this whole year in Louisiana and we both hated it there and decided to move. I miss him dearly and almost feel like he's the only person in my life that truly cares and understands me. Thankfully he's coming out here to live in 3 months. I fear of going crazy or losing personality during our time apart.
So I have jobs to look for, old friends to see, roommates to make friends with, money to save, find a car...with barely any money to live on until I start working. While worrying about all of this, I'm also worrying about having anxiety during job interviews and old friends or just in daily life. I don't want to ruin perceptions that people have of me and lose peoples acceptance of me.
I feel depressed and lonely in this new place, does anybody have any suggestions as to what to do? Should I get prescription drugs? Call a hotline? Working it out on my own is what I'd rather do, because I would hate to become reliant on drugs to make me feel better. Sometimes I just can't think straight because of anxiety and feel like I need something more to just work it out on my own.
Wow, for one evening my thoughts of feeling alone in suffering from all of these symptoms of anxiety/panic disorder has gone away. I've been having anxiety for a little over a year now and haven't gone to the doctor about it at all. I'm thinking I should sometime soon because it's affecting my life greatly. I'm having that wirlwind of thoughts and all I can focus on is having anxiety and the anticipation of it, which is giving me a detachment feeling. Feeling detached is a scary feeling. I've always been outgoing and have made lots of friends in the past. Now I try to make many "transactions" with people short and sweet. I see other people laughing and having a good time with their friends and it bothers me ALOT because I miss having that and keep wondering if I'll be that happy and together again.
These past couple of days I've felt like my anxiety has been full throttle. I just moved to Vancouver, WA which is close to where I grew up. I've been living with my boyfriend this whole year in Louisiana and we both hated it there and decided to move. I miss him dearly and almost feel like he's the only person in my life that truly cares and understands me. Thankfully he's coming out here to live in 3 months. I fear of going crazy or losing personality during our time apart.
So I have jobs to look for, old friends to see, roommates to make friends with, money to save, find a car...with barely any money to live on until I start working. While worrying about all of this, I'm also worrying about having anxiety during job interviews and old friends or just in daily life. I don't want to ruin perceptions that people have of me and lose peoples acceptance of me.
I feel depressed and lonely in this new place, does anybody have any suggestions as to what to do? Should I get prescription drugs? Call a hotline? Working it out on my own is what I'd rather do, because I would hate to become reliant on drugs to make me feel better. Sometimes I just can't think straight because of anxiety and feel like I need something more to just work it out on my own.
Steve1
10-05-2006, 02:16 PM
Very well put Boxerlover!
Bump
Bump
froggirl
10-05-2006, 05:44 PM
Thank you, Boxerlover! I especially identified with the part about being in the car and the red light (that in reality isn't taking any longer than usual) is suddenly taking FOREVER to change! That has actually happened to me, and then that makes me think that I am going insane, then everything starts to go wrong.
Anyway, thanks for your post, it looks like it has already helped lots of people! :wave:
Anyway, thanks for your post, it looks like it has already helped lots of people! :wave:
boxerlover227
10-05-2006, 11:44 PM
Hi Lolamb:wave:
Sorry you are going through some rough times..It seems are anxiety loves to creep in during times of change without us even realizing.. You were going through some major changes with the first move and the fact that you didn't like where you were living doesn't help matters. No being away from your boyfriend who you feel very connected to is stressful in it's self.
I think for now if you can handle the anxiety without feeling to overwhelmed or out of control then by all means do.. focus on the fact that he is returning to you, and surround yourself around positve things, such as dinner or lunch with old friends. Remember to make special time for yourself, whether it be reading a good book or taking a nice autumn walk. But most of all keep in contact with others who feel or are going through what you are. Like you did here on th eanxiety board! You see just reading my post and seeing that I too suffer made you feel that much LESS alone. And that was my whole
purpose in writing this post mission accomplished! As you can see there are so many others who feel this way. You truly aren't alone and I bet if you stick around here you will find so much comfort as well as friends, and most of all understanding and support.. If you have any questions, thoughts or just need to not feel so alone I am here as well! Boxerlover:angel:
Sorry you are going through some rough times..It seems are anxiety loves to creep in during times of change without us even realizing.. You were going through some major changes with the first move and the fact that you didn't like where you were living doesn't help matters. No being away from your boyfriend who you feel very connected to is stressful in it's self.
I think for now if you can handle the anxiety without feeling to overwhelmed or out of control then by all means do.. focus on the fact that he is returning to you, and surround yourself around positve things, such as dinner or lunch with old friends. Remember to make special time for yourself, whether it be reading a good book or taking a nice autumn walk. But most of all keep in contact with others who feel or are going through what you are. Like you did here on th eanxiety board! You see just reading my post and seeing that I too suffer made you feel that much LESS alone. And that was my whole
purpose in writing this post mission accomplished! As you can see there are so many others who feel this way. You truly aren't alone and I bet if you stick around here you will find so much comfort as well as friends, and most of all understanding and support.. If you have any questions, thoughts or just need to not feel so alone I am here as well! Boxerlover:angel: