Hi,
Sorry to bother everyone, but something just happened and I am really upset about it. My roomate and I don't do that much together anymore, but she never says anything about my weight or stuff like other people.
However, I was in my room then and I overheard her on the phone with her friend. I heard her laughing about me and saying how she cooked this big breakfast (bacon, hashbrowns etc) the other morning and I wouldn't come near it. Then she said that her friend should see me. I am gross to look at.
How could she be so mean. I thought she was my best friend, and had even debated going to her and trying to talk to her. Now I would never consider it. I would rather deal on my own. Why do people find this something to laugh at, like it's something we do for fun? One of the girls at work asked me how I lost so much weight the other day, and I told her just watch what you eat (I wasn't going to tell her what I really do). Then they started talking about this girl they knew that took laxatives to lose weight, and they all started laughing like crazy. I'm just saying no wonder people don't want to open up to others. I just want to be totally alone now. I would never tell any of these people how I am feeling. I'm sure people can relate, and by no means am I trying to discourage someone from getting help. I'm just saying in my situation, I will deal on my own and that I don't understand how people can laugh about this. I don't find it funny when I am trying to gather all the strength I have and not take as many laxatives or diet pills or try not to throw up. I know it's mean but I don't even want to talk to her anymore. I feel totally betrayed. Thanks for listening. I don't trust any of them now.

I can totally understand what you are trying to say. I have been made fun of so many times (even right behind my back). People just don't understand just how big of a problem eating disorders are for people. So I guess we just have to put up with their crap.

Hey Found 24. I am 33 years old, 5'8" and now weigh 134#. Last year I got down to 121# and noticed that no one ever said anything to me about my weight. I think girls are jealous of you when you are so thin. Especially thinner than them. And are jealous of your willpower.

I have struggled w/weight issues since I was about 16. I would eat a mayo and lettuce sandwich and an orange and run 10 miles a day. That was it. I even got down to 117.

It's funny because I have seen pictures of myself standing next to people I thought were thinner than me and realized I was a twig! We are too hard on ourselves and I have FINALLY come to see it. It is hard for me to be happy w/weighing 134#. I'm always thinking that I would look better at 127 but I know when I get there I'll just want to lose more. I wear a size 3 or 5, just depends. I think that is skinny enough.

I hope you can come to see yourself as thin enough. You need to eat healthy it is good 4 u. Just don't starve yourself. And please let me know how you are doing.

Take Care

Sorry it took me so long to reply to you. I can not even imagine what you are going through. It must have made you feel pretty awful. I don't even know what to tell you to do about it. All I can say is to come here and talk to us when you need to. We will be here. I have to come here because I have no friends away from here. I consider you one of my closest friends. Thanks for that!
Gail

Thanks for the replies. I really appreciate it. Today hasn't been good. I am working fulltime, but an excellent job came up with the company I used to work with while I was in college and I found out this morning I didn't get it. I took it so personally, like it's because there's something wrong with me personally (where they know me). I weighed in at 119 this morning and went and ate a small cheeseburger at McDonalds, but I stopped in at my apartment and threw up some of it. That's all I can bare the thought of eating today.
I really try not to come here and gripe about my problems, but it's just hard as you know when you feel like you have noone to go to without being ridiculed. I almost feel like my roomate knows there's a problem, but she would rather not acknowledge or have to deal with my problems. Otherwise instead of laughing on the phone and saying that I looked gross, she would have said something to me. I would never open up to her now.
And to Gail, thanks for being there. I hope I can do the same for you. I think of you as a friend also. I hope this week is going better for you. If you need to vent, I'm here to listen.