Hello Everyone, I am a mother of 2 children. The youngest is 7 and has high functioning autism. He is in a special education classroom and things are going well for him. However, I am having trouble with his stimulation. He is constantly "humping" on hard surfaces and he's discovered girls. Whether he knows exactly what he's doing, I am not sure. He asked to look at girl's underwear and he goes to give a girl a hug and tries to grab their chest. I have told him how it's wrong and how boys only see their daddys. And you shouldn't ask to see girls. And some day you will have a wife etc, etc. Well, he keeps doing it and luckily he's only asked my friend's kids and the mothers knowing he has autism understand. I am just waiting for the person whose parent doesn't care that he has autism and isn't as understanding. I am at my wit's end. I don't know what to do with him. I don't know even how he learned such behavior, we don't dress in front of him. His older sister dresses and bathes in the bathroom. So why would he just "discover' girls like this? I am just looking for advice, suggestions, whatever...thanks for letting me vent.

Hi Quirky Mom,

If this were my child, I would undertake a multi-pronged approach ASAP. I am sorry if what follows sounds harsh. My intention is only to help. The info that follows is based on experience in my own & extended family. Read it, consider it, ignore it, whatever. Please take a deep breath before reading on.

First, it's very common for our kids to have sensory issues. Make sure there is nothing about your son's underwear & clothing that is "bugging" him & causing him to seek counter-stimulation. It's not uncommon to need to buy undies a couple sizes larger than normal, so that nothing binds, or to have preferred or refused style or fabric. Soft knit boxers are popular. For YEARS my son wore only sweatpants, and I have seen this with quite a few Aspie & HFA boys. However, each kid is different.

Second, a med checkup to make sure there isn't a urological disorder, or even something simple like jock itch contributing to the behavior. I met one family where circumcision greatly improved some of the behaviors you have described. Not that that's a cure all, but in this case there had been ongoing infection that didn't abate until after the procedure.

Third, it's been documented that a subset of kids on the spectrum have high testosterone levels. There is a blood test for this. With the behavior you are describing, I'm wondering if that might be contributing factor. The average pediatrician will not be up on this research, but most DAN! docs are. Significantly elevated testosterone levels can be treated. To find a DAN! doc, contact the organization, Defeat Autism Now!, which has listings of biomedical intervention docs specializing in autism treatment, in various parts of the country. Your local autism support group and/or local public library reference desk should be able to help you contact DAN!

Fourth, there are behavioral interventions that may need to be implemented. I would recommend you try to find an ABA therapist with experience with sexualized behavior in HFA. However, if testosterone level or mood disorder are causative, and if insight is low (as it typically would be in a 7 yo), behavior therapy alone may be an uphill battle.

Fifth, autism has a high comorbidity w/bipolar disorder. Hypersexuality is a significant feature of bipolar. Eval with a pediatric psychiatrist (preferrably one expert in autism as well), could help you determine whether bipolar is the cause of the behavior. If so, there are mood-stabilizing medications that can be of great benefit.

Sixth, continue to work closely with the school on this issue. Let them know you are concerned, the avenues of care you are seeking, etc. If a behavioral program is undertaken, see if it can be continued at school as soon as is feasible.

I'm sure you are looking for a simple solution -- we all are! However, I must caution you, from sad experience in my extended family, that this sort of behavior left untreated can lead to long-term legal & financial repercussions.

While your son is now only 7 yo, if the sexualized behavior continues, it is only a matter of time before a grievance is filed at school or in the community. Your son's diagnosis is not likely to excuse him or the family's responsibility. As you probably know, there is very low social tolerance for this sort of thing.

Please don't panic. I encourage you to examine your treatment options & pick a direction in the near future. In the meantime, double up on your efforts to ensure your son gets plenty of positive attention from you when he is behaving appropriately.

Best wishes.