I have to give my daughter a bday party tomorrow and the thought is really giving me anxiety!!! I have not socialized SOBER in soooo long. What do I talk about? Not to mention I just moved here 5 months ago so I wont know any of these parents. Why does this seem so hard? I am so shy I think and just coming off opiated does not help I guess. Does anyone have and suggestions on how to make this party flow?
thanks...mara

Hi mara - First I want to say, I think what you're feeling (anxious) is normal. For anyone. Not just someone getting over an addiction. So please don't associate your addiction with it. The difference will be how you will deal with it. You will have a clear head. Clearly, I don't know you. However, from what I've read on these boards you are an intelligent, warm, caring person who I would feel priviledged to meet. In other words - be yourself. You - all by yourself - with no vices - just mara is the best one out there. Simply be her.

Other parents will feel a little awkward too - no big deal - kinda funny when you think about it. You talk to parents about the school and the teachers and the weather, work, etc. Since you're relatively new, you can ask the questions - restaurant suggestions, shopping, etc. And you know what? It's ok to just sit back and watch and observe too. You don't always have to start the convo. Make sense? As far as kids - trust me, they'll do their own thing. When they start something, follow their lead. Kids take care of themselves better than people realize.

Above all - enjoy it mara!! Celebrate your daughters bday!! That's what it's about. And she will never forget how much her mother loves her - and inside, you will feel great knowing what you have done for her.

Gosh, why cant you come to the party? :)))) You made me feel so much better cause you are so right. I guess when you are so clouded from the opiates you really can't imagine doing anything sober! That is the saddest thing I have ever heard! You are so right, I will just be myself and that is all I can do. They probally will be uncomfortable too, I never thought of that one. I am having my neighbor come and help me to keep the flow going. She does not know that I am sober off a nasty pill habbit, but some things you keep to yourself. I have to make bags, clean the house, make food and make 100 balloons! I need to make some coffee. Wish me luck girlfriend. Thanks as always for you great advice and support. I will be ok!!!
mara