Okay, thought I posted this once but cannot find it anywhere -

I am getting antsy about the 6 weeks wait and worried that the cancer will spread while I wait.

I know you all told me that the 6 weeks wait is standard but I just need to hear it again.

CD, I believe you also told me that the radiation continues to work even after you are no longer getting it daily.

I guess I just need to hear it all again.

I love you guys - thanks for tolerating me in my nutjob phases. Will take the anti-anxiety pills if I cannot get a handle on this.

Jeni

Jeni,

Please take a big, breath with me. I KNOW how you are feeling, I have been there myself - and still go there from time to time (recurrence worries plague me now)...BUT, take my hand and trust me...the six week wait is going to be fine. The radiation and chemo you had are still doing their job...also, please remember that these are not fast growing cancers that grow in a matter of days...they grow over months and years...

Try to go for a walk - take a break from reading online - and take in the fall weather. Your body is healing from the chemoradiation right now. Having the surgery now would not be in your best interest. Your body needs to heal. Also, remember that it is very likely that the chemoradiation you had has already killed your tumor... I remember singing in my head "Ding, dong my tumor's dead...the wicked tumor's dead!"

Hope that helps you some. Try to enjoy this time off before the surgery and before post op chemo wipes you out. This is your "vacation" month...try to take a break - do some retail therapy and hit the outlets! :) Get yourself some nice comfy pjs and robe to take to the hospital with you... You will be OK...

Hugs,
Cats

Dear Jeni,

Have been away for awhile (would you believe we took out SUMMER VACATION this past week), still catching up.

What you are feeling is normal. I felt I had NO control over my body, I felt I did not know my body any more, I couldn't trust it anymore. How could I have cancer growing and NOT KNOW IT.

The reason for waiting 6 weeks is to give your body time to heal from the chemo/radiation. I know I needed it, A week or two before my surgery, I was starting to feel good again, and was able to get things done, finally.

It is my understanding the chemo will hang around in your body 6+ weeks, and the radiation should still be doing it's job. So know that they are both working even now. Cats is correct, try to enjoy this time. After surgery, it will be awhile for you to recover.


We're all here if you need us. What you're feeling is normal. You will make it.

Lee