where do i start, at the end and move backwards? timmy died today. it doesn't even look right in print or in reality. the hospital people (proffessionals) gave us the bad news- he's braindead. he was hooked-up since friday the 13th. no joke and i am not suppersticous. it was just another friday night, money in his pocket (just been paid), pretty girl next to him as always, and he was out to party. his cousin, step-sister, close friends, (the ones' who drink anyway). it was everything timmy lived for, all in one night. they closed the bar, got into their respective vehicles, and drove to sisters house 15 miles away from the bar, and his own appartment, to spend more time with the new pretty girl, and to party a little more. then the real reason they were on the road again- to be alone at her house! he got into her car. they left a place that was safe and warm, she got behind the wheel, and they drove off down the road at 2:30 am, all dark ,back roads towards town, where they both lived, and where the bar was! they drove 10 miles away from sisters' house, took a turn onto the road with his elementary and middle school at the other end, and drove into a tree. now this sounds bad, and it is, but there's more. so much more. my son, the new volunteer fire dept. trainee, is downstairs sleeping warm in his bed, and gets paged as he has been almost every friday and saturday night all year, since he joined. (i'm so proud of him) now the story is going in a place that none of us ever could have made up nor wanted. up the stairs and out into the dark, cold october air to help rescue some poor victims in another auto accident. just a friday evening in the home town again!! he was third to get to the "scene". that's what they call where accidents happen. the other two firemen/emt's were already working on the "male passenger". my son, brandon, went to help the female driver. she was screaming about her foot-ankle injury and couldn't get her door open. brandon helped her get out through the driver window, put her on the first stretcher and talked to and comforted her while she received assistance to the scratch on her knee, and they checked out her foot injury.---broken ankle--set in cast and walked out of hospital in town, 1 1/2hrs. later. home she went. brandon didn't know her. never seen her before, but while he was attending to her, he heard his buddy justin (close friend, who is another volunteer) telling someone named timmy to wake-up, wake-up timmy! brandon looked to see why justin was yelling so loudly, and why justin seemed so upset, not his proffessional self like all the young 20+ guys are supposed to perform at accident scenes. timmy? timmy who? justins' face must have said it all. justin noticed that brandon was confused about his behavior and said,"brandon, it's TT.aka-timothy thomas!! what can explain who timmy is to us? simplist way, timmy is the son/brother that myself/brandon thought of him as since brandon brought him home one day 10 years ago. he visited here, ate here, crashed on the couch here, laughed, cried, confided, hung-out, and lived on occasion here. he is part of our small, but close family. no. it wasn't our timmy! but because of the blood and his head injuries and his position in the car and how dark it was and.. and... and...brandon couldn't make it out. no it wasn't. justin was wrong! had to be. that male passenger over there at the opposite side of the car was someone else who just had the misfortune to be in an accident with severe head trauma and god-knows-what-else, for injuries. justin saw brandons' denial and continued to work to get timmy out and onto his own stretcher. the head injuries were bad. everyone at the scene knew that. there was no denying that much. then they began cutting timmy's clothes and shoes off, and there it was- the undeniable truth that it was TT. his tatoo. the one that all the boys' had just like it on their bodies. the tatoo of jay and franny. there it is. the end of the other story that i have to tell you, i have to remember, mourn, cry, heal from, and watch these kids have to live with since it became their reality on sept. 12, 2004- jay's 18th birthday. another horrable car crash. two dead, young, brain-injured, loved and missed unbelievably friends!!!! oh my god, here it is all over again!! we warned them. we told them that if some of them didn't change their ways that it would happen to them!!! all us parents had so many talks with all of them, the crew, the east brooklyn invinceable crew. don't worry. we know. ok, your right. we won't. it's not going to happen to me, i'm more careful. i wouldn't drive that carelessly. we heard it all, us parents'. they were paying attention. they would never forget how awful that whole ordeal was. jay was great. nice young man, good, caring family. had the nicest, prettiest, girl as his other half. her parents were the best you could want to know, too. but it didn't matter. those two beautiful kids are dead too. have been for two years now. too fast behind the wheel. no alcohol or drugs in that crash, but dead just the same. gone for good. a nice picture of the two of them with a spiritual saying on the back, hangs from everyones' rear view mirror. we look at it every time we drive anywhere. they were loved and they are missed, terribly. they were too young, too special, too loved for this to have happen, but it did anyway. we parents knew it would happen again, too. if they didn't listen to us. all they had to do was listen to us. one small, little thing, and we wouldn't have to go through this again. it hurt everyone involved way too much to be able to do it ever again. right? WHY??????

It's a sad fact that kids think they're invincible and push their boundaries all too often. Some get lucky and live through those years, some don't.

I've always been a great believer of a sad, but true saying - "no one ever said life was fair"

I think we can all relate to that phrase.

Whilst I am very sad for your loss, at least it can be said that Timmy is now in a better place and free from his pain and suffering.

Life is often too short and we never know when death can come for us all. But it's always harder to accept when those young and innocent are taken before their time.