sobs
10-25-2006, 07:17 AM
I am wondering if I am alone in this. When I get groceries...well, that is a nightmare in itself, with hand wipes, after touching each thing. And then, when I get home, it just gets worse and worse. I HAVE to wash everything. If it is something that I cannot use soap and water on (example: bag of sugar, cereal), then I wipe the bag down with a "hand" wipe.
All of my cans, bottles, jars must be washed. Even fruit, like bananas. Apples are hard to do, because sometimes the wash leaves a soapy taste to the apple.
It is completely maddening. For instance, I pick up a can of pepsi. My hands are contaminated from touching the can. So, I wash my hands. Then I carefully pick up the can with a soapy paper towel, making sure that my hands do not touch the can before I wash the can, or I have to wash my hands again......... Just everything, over and over.
And, am I the only person who washes my hands before I was dishes, and then I wash my hands AFTER I have washed the dishes. I wash the catfood cans and pouches. I wash my hands before I feed my cats!!!!!!
Does anyone out there have this need to wash their groceries??? And, any "short cuts" for this?
Thanks,
sobs :dizzy:
All of my cans, bottles, jars must be washed. Even fruit, like bananas. Apples are hard to do, because sometimes the wash leaves a soapy taste to the apple.
It is completely maddening. For instance, I pick up a can of pepsi. My hands are contaminated from touching the can. So, I wash my hands. Then I carefully pick up the can with a soapy paper towel, making sure that my hands do not touch the can before I wash the can, or I have to wash my hands again......... Just everything, over and over.
And, am I the only person who washes my hands before I was dishes, and then I wash my hands AFTER I have washed the dishes. I wash the catfood cans and pouches. I wash my hands before I feed my cats!!!!!!
Does anyone out there have this need to wash their groceries??? And, any "short cuts" for this?
Thanks,
sobs :dizzy:
Sponsor
BadMalibu
10-25-2006, 03:31 PM
Sobs-
Well I personally do not have germ contamination fears, but we all know what you're going through, we all just have different obsessions/compulsions. I would first recommend that if you're not already, you find a good CBT in your area and start therapy in conjunction with medications. The CBT will be able to help you figure out what's at the root of your OCD issues, which will enable you to get rid of some of the symptoms.
You're probably saying to yourself, I don't have any problems, my only problem is that I have OCD! Well, we must stop and think about WHY we have OCD before we can make it go away. So why do we have it? Most of it is about control. Maybe unconciously you have a real fear of contracting a disease and your sub concious knows this, but you don't. It's not washing the food that keeps you safe, but your sub-concious is so worried, you start to manipulate the only thing you have control over, which is your food or washing your hands. Since we cannot control if we get cancer, if we get a disease, or when we die, why not just control your groceries?? OCD is about manipulating things that are within your enviornment that you have some control over vs. things in your mind that you don't have control over.
I tell people this all the time. The next time you want to have compulsions about groceries, why not stand on your head and count to 58? Better yet, wear one sock and run around the house naked for 4 minutes, then sit down and knit a sweater. Do you see my point? My point is, is that no matter what we do, no matter what rituals we go through, no matter what compulsions we have, we cannot control the future. Bad things are going to happen to us all, and we feel that by manipulating things around us and doing what our brain tells us to, we can avoid the heartache and pain of life in general.
To prove my point, alot of people that suffer from OCD that wind up with cancer or some other terminal illness will notice a significant decrease in their OCD symptoms. Why? Well they're sick, they have no control over what's going to happen although they might like to, and they have to face reality, which is there really isn't much more they can do. When I'm sick with the flu or something else, I notice a drastic decrease in my symptoms.
A CBT is going to help you go through systematic desensitization and help you get rid of this complusion by slowly exposing you to maybe not washing ever single item. As time goes on you'll wash less and less.
Keep your head up, and good luck!:D
Well I personally do not have germ contamination fears, but we all know what you're going through, we all just have different obsessions/compulsions. I would first recommend that if you're not already, you find a good CBT in your area and start therapy in conjunction with medications. The CBT will be able to help you figure out what's at the root of your OCD issues, which will enable you to get rid of some of the symptoms.
You're probably saying to yourself, I don't have any problems, my only problem is that I have OCD! Well, we must stop and think about WHY we have OCD before we can make it go away. So why do we have it? Most of it is about control. Maybe unconciously you have a real fear of contracting a disease and your sub concious knows this, but you don't. It's not washing the food that keeps you safe, but your sub-concious is so worried, you start to manipulate the only thing you have control over, which is your food or washing your hands. Since we cannot control if we get cancer, if we get a disease, or when we die, why not just control your groceries?? OCD is about manipulating things that are within your enviornment that you have some control over vs. things in your mind that you don't have control over.
I tell people this all the time. The next time you want to have compulsions about groceries, why not stand on your head and count to 58? Better yet, wear one sock and run around the house naked for 4 minutes, then sit down and knit a sweater. Do you see my point? My point is, is that no matter what we do, no matter what rituals we go through, no matter what compulsions we have, we cannot control the future. Bad things are going to happen to us all, and we feel that by manipulating things around us and doing what our brain tells us to, we can avoid the heartache and pain of life in general.
To prove my point, alot of people that suffer from OCD that wind up with cancer or some other terminal illness will notice a significant decrease in their OCD symptoms. Why? Well they're sick, they have no control over what's going to happen although they might like to, and they have to face reality, which is there really isn't much more they can do. When I'm sick with the flu or something else, I notice a drastic decrease in my symptoms.
A CBT is going to help you go through systematic desensitization and help you get rid of this complusion by slowly exposing you to maybe not washing ever single item. As time goes on you'll wash less and less.
Keep your head up, and good luck!:D
sobs
10-26-2006, 08:44 PM
:nono:
PLEASE DO NOT READ THIS IF YOU HAVE ISSUES WITH GERMS AND FOOD!!!
Hi Bad,
Thanks for your kind post. I AM on medication for my OCD, and the handwashing has gotten better. Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately :jester: ), I cannot go to a therapist, because I am mostly home bound with an autoimmune disease. I get out about 2-3 times a year, for doctor appts. I will stop and pick up a few groceries when I am out, if able.
I know 3 reasons for my washing. My mother washed her hands a lot, and would wipe food with a towel. She also had a "garage sale" compulsion along with hoarding, and she was super super religious. It never entered my mind that she had an illness with a name, until I got sick. Unfortunately, she never got any help with her OCD. And, her OCD finally went away when she had too many mini strokes. So number one reason is genetic.
Number 2 reason is that when I was well, I worked for the Sheriff's Dept. After a few years, I was assigned to the jail. I worked in the area where people were brought in. We had to handle all of their property, including money. Many of the drunks had urinated (or worse) on their money and property, and we had to handle it. This was before gloves.....EGAD. Needless to say, the sink in the bathroom was well used!!!!! But, that was good sense. And, it led to my complete FREAKOUT over touching money now.
Reason 3, the dang media. It seems every time the news is on, there is another story about gross stuff EVERYWHERE, from the sneezes wafting in the air, to pay phones, to escalator rails, etc. Rat droppings found on food in warehouses-OMG. Then there is e-coli.......etc. And the knowledge that a majority of people do not wash their hands after using the bathroom. Also, the mail. Must wash hands after touching my mail........has the mailman washed his hands?...has he blown his nose, has he sneezed, etc., etc.??? A funny thing though is that after the mail has been here a few days (in my house), I don't mind touching it without washing my hands. It is like the mailman's cooties have now become my cooties, and that's okay. Wish that worked with the groceries.:rolleyes:
It is all so very illogical, yet logical.
I am very well aware that this IS a PROBLEM. I know that most of it is irrational. Thing with me is, not washing causes so much anxiety, and anxiety makes my autoimmune disease worse, so it's just easier to wash. You have a very valid point regarding when you have the flu or some other illness, that your OCD lessens. I know that on days when I can hardly get out of bed, due to my illness, I can stand at the sink and tell myself that I do not feel like washing my hands however many times. I may reduce the number of times, but the symptom/desire is still there.
I think that subconciously, there may be a fear of getting another illness, but it really doesn't seem intense. I meditate quite a lot. If you ask me any time of the day why I am washing my hands - after shaking hands with someone, or why I am washing groceries, or using wipes after touching groceries, I would tell you that it is just gross, nasty, spooty. Why am I washing my hands after I shake hands with that person? Did they wash their hands after potty-ing? EWWWWWW!!!!! Kinda like stepping in doggie doo.....you have to wash it off of your shoes, and then wash your hands.....not because of germs, but because it is so major GROSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Again, thanks so much for your kind reply. Any other ideas......I'm listening. Why are there not phone therapists???
sobs
PLEASE DO NOT READ THIS IF YOU HAVE ISSUES WITH GERMS AND FOOD!!!
Hi Bad,
Thanks for your kind post. I AM on medication for my OCD, and the handwashing has gotten better. Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately :jester: ), I cannot go to a therapist, because I am mostly home bound with an autoimmune disease. I get out about 2-3 times a year, for doctor appts. I will stop and pick up a few groceries when I am out, if able.
I know 3 reasons for my washing. My mother washed her hands a lot, and would wipe food with a towel. She also had a "garage sale" compulsion along with hoarding, and she was super super religious. It never entered my mind that she had an illness with a name, until I got sick. Unfortunately, she never got any help with her OCD. And, her OCD finally went away when she had too many mini strokes. So number one reason is genetic.
Number 2 reason is that when I was well, I worked for the Sheriff's Dept. After a few years, I was assigned to the jail. I worked in the area where people were brought in. We had to handle all of their property, including money. Many of the drunks had urinated (or worse) on their money and property, and we had to handle it. This was before gloves.....EGAD. Needless to say, the sink in the bathroom was well used!!!!! But, that was good sense. And, it led to my complete FREAKOUT over touching money now.
Reason 3, the dang media. It seems every time the news is on, there is another story about gross stuff EVERYWHERE, from the sneezes wafting in the air, to pay phones, to escalator rails, etc. Rat droppings found on food in warehouses-OMG. Then there is e-coli.......etc. And the knowledge that a majority of people do not wash their hands after using the bathroom. Also, the mail. Must wash hands after touching my mail........has the mailman washed his hands?...has he blown his nose, has he sneezed, etc., etc.??? A funny thing though is that after the mail has been here a few days (in my house), I don't mind touching it without washing my hands. It is like the mailman's cooties have now become my cooties, and that's okay. Wish that worked with the groceries.:rolleyes:
It is all so very illogical, yet logical.
I am very well aware that this IS a PROBLEM. I know that most of it is irrational. Thing with me is, not washing causes so much anxiety, and anxiety makes my autoimmune disease worse, so it's just easier to wash. You have a very valid point regarding when you have the flu or some other illness, that your OCD lessens. I know that on days when I can hardly get out of bed, due to my illness, I can stand at the sink and tell myself that I do not feel like washing my hands however many times. I may reduce the number of times, but the symptom/desire is still there.
I think that subconciously, there may be a fear of getting another illness, but it really doesn't seem intense. I meditate quite a lot. If you ask me any time of the day why I am washing my hands - after shaking hands with someone, or why I am washing groceries, or using wipes after touching groceries, I would tell you that it is just gross, nasty, spooty. Why am I washing my hands after I shake hands with that person? Did they wash their hands after potty-ing? EWWWWWW!!!!! Kinda like stepping in doggie doo.....you have to wash it off of your shoes, and then wash your hands.....not because of germs, but because it is so major GROSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Again, thanks so much for your kind reply. Any other ideas......I'm listening. Why are there not phone therapists???
sobs
BadMalibu
10-26-2006, 10:39 PM
Sobs-
Although you site good reasons (1, 2, 3) for your hand washing, any CBT will tell you that it's not that you worked with dirty people, or your mom did it, it has to do with what's going on in the sub-concious area of your brain. You can't rationlize OCD and say, well my mom had it and that's why I have it. Or, I used to work in the Sheriff's department, and that's why I have it. The reasons we have OCD are deep within our minds and they're not concious.
The problem with your theories is that many people have worked in the law enforcement field and they don't go to the lenghty extents that you do to make sure your hands and food are clean. As for the media, well most people see those things and might have the same exact thoughts you do, but not take it to the length that you do.
Yes I know, it sounds like I'm disagreeing with you, but in a way I am because I'd like you to see that OCD is not necisarily always caused by outside influences. The debate rages on with Psychologists and Psychiatrists. Are we the way we are today because of genetics? Or are we the way we are today because of the enviornment that we grew up in? There's substantial evidence to support both theories, but I personally think it has to do with both. I mean no one else in my family has OCD, so if your mom had it and you think that's why you have OCD, well then why don't either one of my parents have it?
As for phone counseling, the CBT I have right now does phone therapy for people that are agoraphobic (not able to leave the house) or for people that are too sick to come to the office. All I can say is that once you find a good CBT that you're comfortable with, stick with them so they can help you through your OCD.
Anything else I can do to help, just let me know! :D
Although you site good reasons (1, 2, 3) for your hand washing, any CBT will tell you that it's not that you worked with dirty people, or your mom did it, it has to do with what's going on in the sub-concious area of your brain. You can't rationlize OCD and say, well my mom had it and that's why I have it. Or, I used to work in the Sheriff's department, and that's why I have it. The reasons we have OCD are deep within our minds and they're not concious.
The problem with your theories is that many people have worked in the law enforcement field and they don't go to the lenghty extents that you do to make sure your hands and food are clean. As for the media, well most people see those things and might have the same exact thoughts you do, but not take it to the length that you do.
Yes I know, it sounds like I'm disagreeing with you, but in a way I am because I'd like you to see that OCD is not necisarily always caused by outside influences. The debate rages on with Psychologists and Psychiatrists. Are we the way we are today because of genetics? Or are we the way we are today because of the enviornment that we grew up in? There's substantial evidence to support both theories, but I personally think it has to do with both. I mean no one else in my family has OCD, so if your mom had it and you think that's why you have OCD, well then why don't either one of my parents have it?
As for phone counseling, the CBT I have right now does phone therapy for people that are agoraphobic (not able to leave the house) or for people that are too sick to come to the office. All I can say is that once you find a good CBT that you're comfortable with, stick with them so they can help you through your OCD.
Anything else I can do to help, just let me know! :D
sobs
10-27-2006, 01:40 AM
Hi Bad,
Very good points to all, and I completely agree with you. Maybe I did not quite finish my thought (that would be a first:) ). I guess I alluded to the 3 points, then dropped the ball.
The first reason, I merely meant that many seem to think that there is a genetic predisposition to this. Yes, my mother probably had OCD, but, Lord knows it never "rubbed off" on me in my early years.
The 2nd thing.....Sheriff's Dept/jail.......... that did not effect me at the time either, except in wise, normal/natural ways. Even after I retired on disability, the money did not freak me out, except to be conscious that I needed to wash my hands before I stuck them in my mouth..... ewww. I had every kind of horrible stuff you can imagine thrown on me at the jail. I'd just go wash my face, or whatever, and continue with work.
The media.....? You are absolutely correct again. Certainly the media reports these things more often now, and/or is more available. That is an outlet that I now turn off, when I hear they have an upcoming spot on spoot!
Thanks for reminding me of these things. It is good to hear, and needs to be heard more often by all of us OCD-ers, I am sure. Anyway, other than the genetic predisposition being questionable, I meant to say that these things inflamed my OCD, when the OCD began. Not the cause of OCD at all. Just the knowledge of these things --- that when my OCD hit, and I noticed the hand washing getting out of control, I realized that I was "using" a lot of that old knowledge to say to myself "oh yeah, that was terribly nasty, that was gross---I MUST wash!" Ignorance is bliss.:D
I am wondering though, are you saying that by not allowing myself to wash my hands, say after touching the mail, and seeing that nothing horrible happens to me, that this will help the problem????? I kNOW that nothing bad will happen. And, there is always a but..... I get so stressed out by not giving in to my OCD, that it does aggravate my auto-immune disease. It is so seriously aggravated by stress, that once, when I smoked, my doctor said that I needed to quit, but at that point, if it stressed me too much, not to try right then. (Thank God I was able to quit without a problem.)
I am very much in to sensory distraction. If I can fill my head full enough of sound, sight,etc., I can sometimes at least get away from washing numerous times back to back. It doesn't always help. I catch myself counting while I am singing out loud.:dizzy:
Thanks for the talks. I do enjoy them. I greatly respect others' thought, opinions, and advice, and give them much thought and consideration.
Want to talk about numbers and counting??? hehe
sobs
Very good points to all, and I completely agree with you. Maybe I did not quite finish my thought (that would be a first:) ). I guess I alluded to the 3 points, then dropped the ball.
The first reason, I merely meant that many seem to think that there is a genetic predisposition to this. Yes, my mother probably had OCD, but, Lord knows it never "rubbed off" on me in my early years.
The 2nd thing.....Sheriff's Dept/jail.......... that did not effect me at the time either, except in wise, normal/natural ways. Even after I retired on disability, the money did not freak me out, except to be conscious that I needed to wash my hands before I stuck them in my mouth..... ewww. I had every kind of horrible stuff you can imagine thrown on me at the jail. I'd just go wash my face, or whatever, and continue with work.
The media.....? You are absolutely correct again. Certainly the media reports these things more often now, and/or is more available. That is an outlet that I now turn off, when I hear they have an upcoming spot on spoot!
Thanks for reminding me of these things. It is good to hear, and needs to be heard more often by all of us OCD-ers, I am sure. Anyway, other than the genetic predisposition being questionable, I meant to say that these things inflamed my OCD, when the OCD began. Not the cause of OCD at all. Just the knowledge of these things --- that when my OCD hit, and I noticed the hand washing getting out of control, I realized that I was "using" a lot of that old knowledge to say to myself "oh yeah, that was terribly nasty, that was gross---I MUST wash!" Ignorance is bliss.:D
I am wondering though, are you saying that by not allowing myself to wash my hands, say after touching the mail, and seeing that nothing horrible happens to me, that this will help the problem????? I kNOW that nothing bad will happen. And, there is always a but..... I get so stressed out by not giving in to my OCD, that it does aggravate my auto-immune disease. It is so seriously aggravated by stress, that once, when I smoked, my doctor said that I needed to quit, but at that point, if it stressed me too much, not to try right then. (Thank God I was able to quit without a problem.)
I am very much in to sensory distraction. If I can fill my head full enough of sound, sight,etc., I can sometimes at least get away from washing numerous times back to back. It doesn't always help. I catch myself counting while I am singing out loud.:dizzy:
Thanks for the talks. I do enjoy them. I greatly respect others' thought, opinions, and advice, and give them much thought and consideration.
Want to talk about numbers and counting??? hehe
sobs
Diet Dew
10-27-2006, 02:22 AM
Sobs~
I'm so sorry you have to spend so much time washing your hands etc... I have a 15yr old Daughter that has some OCD issues. They are not germ related, but hard to deal with just the same. I have learned to redirect her and it can work except if she is want ing to REPEAT the same thing that happened at school (especially if a boy she likes said one word to her or looked at her etc...) She just has to talk over you and continue. She just CAN'T stop. If you stop her she feels the need to start all over again with the SAME story. I know she NEEDS to do it, but some days I can't take it. i try not to get irritated with her.
I have several SEVERE food allergies that I just found out about in June 06 and it is hard enough to be at the store and have to buy groceries for my family that could make me lay down throw up sick. I have to spend a lot of time reading labels, so I could only imagine how frustrating it must be for you to shop. I am so sorry and I hope you can find the answers and the help you need!!! My daughter is ADD and a lot of ADD and ADHD kids have OCD issues. My aunt is schitzophrenic (SP) and OCD, and I have no idea if my DH got it from her. That isn't really the issue even though it would be nice to have some answers. It is all about making her life as good as we can and helping her function. I do worry about her having kids and a family!!! Scary! She is on meds and is getting better grades, but her room and starying on one HOME task is a nightmare. My 17yr old is a sr. and has a 4yr full ride scholarship to any college and is majoring in Phsycology yet her sister drives her crazy with her ways! Explain that??? I told her she has to deal with issues that bug her all the time in that profession. I know, I can go home after I help them..... HHHMMMM.... Some people take it home wtih them home you can deal! You know teenagers, they are invincible(SP). I hope she is right. I want her to help others and understand her sister.
Good luck and keep posting
I'm so sorry you have to spend so much time washing your hands etc... I have a 15yr old Daughter that has some OCD issues. They are not germ related, but hard to deal with just the same. I have learned to redirect her and it can work except if she is want ing to REPEAT the same thing that happened at school (especially if a boy she likes said one word to her or looked at her etc...) She just has to talk over you and continue. She just CAN'T stop. If you stop her she feels the need to start all over again with the SAME story. I know she NEEDS to do it, but some days I can't take it. i try not to get irritated with her.
I have several SEVERE food allergies that I just found out about in June 06 and it is hard enough to be at the store and have to buy groceries for my family that could make me lay down throw up sick. I have to spend a lot of time reading labels, so I could only imagine how frustrating it must be for you to shop. I am so sorry and I hope you can find the answers and the help you need!!! My daughter is ADD and a lot of ADD and ADHD kids have OCD issues. My aunt is schitzophrenic (SP) and OCD, and I have no idea if my DH got it from her. That isn't really the issue even though it would be nice to have some answers. It is all about making her life as good as we can and helping her function. I do worry about her having kids and a family!!! Scary! She is on meds and is getting better grades, but her room and starying on one HOME task is a nightmare. My 17yr old is a sr. and has a 4yr full ride scholarship to any college and is majoring in Phsycology yet her sister drives her crazy with her ways! Explain that??? I told her she has to deal with issues that bug her all the time in that profession. I know, I can go home after I help them..... HHHMMMM.... Some people take it home wtih them home you can deal! You know teenagers, they are invincible(SP). I hope she is right. I want her to help others and understand her sister.
Good luck and keep posting
sobs
10-27-2006, 04:32 AM
Hi DD,
That is a new one for me. I have not heard of talking and repeating before.
It really must be terribly hard. I guess you have probably tried setting "schedules" for everyone. Example: 7-8PM is her hour and everyone can only listen to and relate to her subject(s). Another hour for someone else, etc. It is just an idea. This might give her a chance to feel like this is my time, and will also keep you from feeling guilty about maybe not listening all of the time.......?
You do not have to answer this here, but if your daughter is ADD, you should check her medicine. Is she on ritalin? At some point/age, ritalin stops acting as a "depressant" and starts having the opposite effect.....kind of like amphetamine/speed. This might be something you want to check out.
I did not get Rx help for my OCD, until my doctor added a second anti-depressant. He said that many times with OCD, a drug may need a second different drug, to give the first one a kick. It worked, thank God. I am down from about 200 hand washings a day, to about 75, which is manageable for me. The Rxs I take for this are celexa and wellbutrin (FYI).
Having already been disabled before OCD hit, I know several other disabled folks. Some parents just get down right disgusted with their (grown) children, when they visit and their house is a wreck, or the person has not bathed, etc. After I have talked to the parents, it really seems to help. The main thing I tell them is to just think about this..."Who on earth would want to lie on the sofa all day long for years, live in filth, or not bathe?" It seems to help them understand somewhat. This is NOT what anyone would choose.
So sorry about those food allergies. Just what ya needed, huh?:mad: It is very not nice to all of a sudden get allergies to things you have been exposed to your whole life. I hope shopping will get easier for you after you have learned the labels on your "regular" food that you buy.
You sound like a wonderful, caring mom. I wonder if - on your bad days, you could gently explain to her that this is a horrible day for you, and you know she understands bad days, and would she write down her "story" for you, so that you could read it later. Just another thought.
How wonderful for your senior daughter to be going off to college!!! I'm sure you know that Majors change a lot, once a person gets in to their studies. I would not worry too much about her getting nutz over her younger sister. I think siblings for the most part, are supposed to drive each other crazy.:)
Also, I do not know if you have posted a question or not, but if not, you might want to. I would hate for your post to get "lost" in the middle of my groceries!!! :-D
Thanks for your kind post.
sobs
That is a new one for me. I have not heard of talking and repeating before.
It really must be terribly hard. I guess you have probably tried setting "schedules" for everyone. Example: 7-8PM is her hour and everyone can only listen to and relate to her subject(s). Another hour for someone else, etc. It is just an idea. This might give her a chance to feel like this is my time, and will also keep you from feeling guilty about maybe not listening all of the time.......?
You do not have to answer this here, but if your daughter is ADD, you should check her medicine. Is she on ritalin? At some point/age, ritalin stops acting as a "depressant" and starts having the opposite effect.....kind of like amphetamine/speed. This might be something you want to check out.
I did not get Rx help for my OCD, until my doctor added a second anti-depressant. He said that many times with OCD, a drug may need a second different drug, to give the first one a kick. It worked, thank God. I am down from about 200 hand washings a day, to about 75, which is manageable for me. The Rxs I take for this are celexa and wellbutrin (FYI).
Having already been disabled before OCD hit, I know several other disabled folks. Some parents just get down right disgusted with their (grown) children, when they visit and their house is a wreck, or the person has not bathed, etc. After I have talked to the parents, it really seems to help. The main thing I tell them is to just think about this..."Who on earth would want to lie on the sofa all day long for years, live in filth, or not bathe?" It seems to help them understand somewhat. This is NOT what anyone would choose.
So sorry about those food allergies. Just what ya needed, huh?:mad: It is very not nice to all of a sudden get allergies to things you have been exposed to your whole life. I hope shopping will get easier for you after you have learned the labels on your "regular" food that you buy.
You sound like a wonderful, caring mom. I wonder if - on your bad days, you could gently explain to her that this is a horrible day for you, and you know she understands bad days, and would she write down her "story" for you, so that you could read it later. Just another thought.
How wonderful for your senior daughter to be going off to college!!! I'm sure you know that Majors change a lot, once a person gets in to their studies. I would not worry too much about her getting nutz over her younger sister. I think siblings for the most part, are supposed to drive each other crazy.:)
Also, I do not know if you have posted a question or not, but if not, you might want to. I would hate for your post to get "lost" in the middle of my groceries!!! :-D
Thanks for your kind post.
sobs
Diet Dew
10-27-2006, 12:05 PM
Thanks for your kind post.
Having my DD write her story is a great idea. I don't know how she would deal with that. She doesn't see that great and there are no glasses or surgery that will help her so she doesn't like to write or just READ for fun. It is amazing she has gotten to 10th grade. She is doing better this yr. She hated Jr. High. She feel real bad she is in resource classes. She calls them the retard and trouble maker classes. I told her, yes I know you aren't to the level all those boys and a few girls in your classes are, but you need the extra help. I told her it is only helping you. It's ok if your the best in the resource class than the worst and strugglingin in the main stream class isn't it? She said yes, I guess. I did agree to let her try mainstream Biology due to the fact that she is the ONLY girl in that class. There is a boy in there that threatened to kill a boy she liked in 9th grade. It really unnerved her. He also sat behind her on the first day of school and ran his fingers through the back of her hair. She flipped over that. She is a little 5' foot spitfire. I have taught her to take care of herself because she has been teased for so long. She is beautiful, but she was born with one leg and arm a little shorter than the other and she suffers from a Brain injury from birth. People don't see any of the struggles with her from just looking at her. She has a beautiful shell, but there are other issues inside. She OCD's over Sleeping beauty and Romeo and Juliet. She is very much expecting her prince to ride up on his white horse or in a carriage and take her away. I tell her that would be nice, but you have to live in the here and now and reality. She is very lovey dovey and gets on a boy for about 2yrs and that is what she goes on about Forever. I know it is important to her so most ALL the time I listen, but I do say you already told me that 30 min ago.
I'm sure my Sr. might decide to change if she feels uncomfortable in the Major she has chosen. She is smart. We will see.
DD has been on several meds. She is ok with her meds. She has done this forever. It helps her get her school work done. She sees her Doc every 6 months and we adjust accordingly. She isn't hyper so much, more of a dreamer, in lala land. I just wan her to be able to get married, have kids and be able to take care of them and be happy and I will help her any way I can. I know she wil have trials, but I have NEVER told her she can't do something, she has to at least TRY!!!
Thanks for listening and hang in there. you sound like a wonderful person!!
DD:)
Having my DD write her story is a great idea. I don't know how she would deal with that. She doesn't see that great and there are no glasses or surgery that will help her so she doesn't like to write or just READ for fun. It is amazing she has gotten to 10th grade. She is doing better this yr. She hated Jr. High. She feel real bad she is in resource classes. She calls them the retard and trouble maker classes. I told her, yes I know you aren't to the level all those boys and a few girls in your classes are, but you need the extra help. I told her it is only helping you. It's ok if your the best in the resource class than the worst and strugglingin in the main stream class isn't it? She said yes, I guess. I did agree to let her try mainstream Biology due to the fact that she is the ONLY girl in that class. There is a boy in there that threatened to kill a boy she liked in 9th grade. It really unnerved her. He also sat behind her on the first day of school and ran his fingers through the back of her hair. She flipped over that. She is a little 5' foot spitfire. I have taught her to take care of herself because she has been teased for so long. She is beautiful, but she was born with one leg and arm a little shorter than the other and she suffers from a Brain injury from birth. People don't see any of the struggles with her from just looking at her. She has a beautiful shell, but there are other issues inside. She OCD's over Sleeping beauty and Romeo and Juliet. She is very much expecting her prince to ride up on his white horse or in a carriage and take her away. I tell her that would be nice, but you have to live in the here and now and reality. She is very lovey dovey and gets on a boy for about 2yrs and that is what she goes on about Forever. I know it is important to her so most ALL the time I listen, but I do say you already told me that 30 min ago.
I'm sure my Sr. might decide to change if she feels uncomfortable in the Major she has chosen. She is smart. We will see.
DD has been on several meds. She is ok with her meds. She has done this forever. It helps her get her school work done. She sees her Doc every 6 months and we adjust accordingly. She isn't hyper so much, more of a dreamer, in lala land. I just wan her to be able to get married, have kids and be able to take care of them and be happy and I will help her any way I can. I know she wil have trials, but I have NEVER told her she can't do something, she has to at least TRY!!!
Thanks for listening and hang in there. you sound like a wonderful person!!
DD:)