I'm in real need of support right now. A few hours ago I was fine but now for the past hour all I can think about is death, it came on so suddenly. I'm NOT suicidal but all that is going round in my head at the moment is how I could kill myself and what it would be like if I did and stuff like that. I tried to do some drawing (i love to just sketch to take my mind off things) but then found myself wanting to DRAW stuff relating to death. It scaring me that I can think this way, has anyone else ever experienced these feelings so strong?:confused:

A scared and confused x-Bliss-x

I think i may have experienced what you are going through before at some point. These thoughts will probably became less if you sleep on it. Keep doing things to distract yourself. sorry i can't give better advice today, feel pretty crappy myself :( sorry.

Are you upset about something? That's what I find is usually the problem. Then I can make the issue seem smaller, or talk to someone about it.

No, there is nothing that I can think of that causes these bouts of depression, they just seem to come from nowhere. I am currently attending my doctor and awaiting blood test results to see if there is a physical reason for these mood swings. If not he think I may have Bipolar but will have to send me to a pdoc to get a diagnosis. It'll be a couple of weeks until I get the blood results so I was trying to stay as positive as I could until then and was feeling fine like I said until a few hours ago. I don't know how to describe how quickly my mood changed. It was like this huge black cloud just came over me. :(

x-Bliss-x

Maybe you see death as an escape. and it is something youve probably never done before, lol, so in a way its a kind of a safe escape thinking about it.

Hunni is there anyone you can call or speak to now? If not it might be a good idea to go to your nearest doctors or ER department.

Last time I felt like that I cut myself so badly.

Get help hun please and let us know how you are doing.

Well it's the third night of feeling this way and i'm still here. There must be good point to that somewhere.

At the moment i'm feeling more frustrated with myself for feeling this way. I havn't self harmed in over 3 years yet I feel so annoyed right now that there's no way I can possibly do it without anyone noticing (i swim). And then I'm angry with myself for even wanting to! Argh!

x-Bliss-x

That's how I've been thinking for the last couple of months. I haven't self-harmed in about 5 years and I wouldn't but I do think about that and suicide. I just get so frustrated when people around me don't seem to understand how I feel and get frustrated or just withdraw from me. I know no-one else can cure me I'm just finding it hard because I can't do all the things I love. I haven't attended uni in 4 weeks and I can't concentrate. I'm withdrawing from things and struggling to hold it together. Counselling is helping but it's only an hour a week and meds just seem to be making my loss of appetite and difficulty sleeping even worse.:confused: