Hi there, I am almost 20 years old and I have been with my boyfriend for over 3 years. We lived together and decided we would try for a baby. So, the past 2 years we have been trying to conceive, but no luck. I know there is something wrong with me; I can go months at a clip with no period and I never see CM.
My boyfriend proposed a couple of months ago, but I rejected and made up an excuse that I just wasn't ready. The truth is that I know how much he wants a family, and I am terrified I will not be able to give him that. Sometimes during our conversations he'll bring up the fact that we still don't have a baby- little does he know as soon as I'm alone I start crying.
I have read other posts and learned that it is helpful to learn of infertility early, as treatment can be more successful. I'm glad I have known about this but on the otherhand I worry about treatment costs and heartache. We really love eachother, but I just want him to be happy- and he won't be happy if I'm not.
To make matters worse, his sister just announced she is expecting her 2nd child- she tried conceiving her first when we started trying. I'm just so upset over all of this, I love her son to death and he spends a lot of time with us but I just can't help the jealousy and envy, followed by such sadness. I just don't know what to do. Thank you for taking the time to read this.

Hi Sunny,

If you are worried about it, you should definately make an appointment with your gynocologist or a reproductive endocrynologist to find out what is going on. I always had periods that were far apart too but didn't know when I was younger that it was an issue because I wasn't trying to get pregnant.

Now I just turned 30 and am going through my first IUI because I haven't been able to concieve on my own for the last 2 years of trying. I know it seems scary to go through all the testing and being scared that you might find out worse news than you imagined but it's worth it if you know you want to try to have children. I waited until I was 29 to find out I had PCOS. My best friend found out she had PCOS a long time ago and was able to go on meds to regulate her periods and then she ended up getting pregnant without even trying! You may find out that whatever the problem is, it may be a small one that can be fixed easily.

Whatever you decide to do I wish you luck. It is really scary going through it but I have found the ladies on this bb are the best and at least you have people here to go through it with.

Lori

HI Sunnyside,
Welcome! If I were you I would definitely make an appt with an re since you skip periods and have been trying 2yrs. It doesn't necessarily mean anything is terribly wrong with you, it might be something that would be very easily treated or fixed completely. The dr will probably also want to run a test on your bf to check his counts. I know it's frustrating when we see our friends and other family members having kids (seems like someone or other is always turning up pregnant in my circle).
My dh and myself knew we wanted a big family before we got married too. I was about your age then, 29 now. If you have insurance, the treatment may not be as expensive as you think, and even if you don't, it all depends on what the problem is. It is heartbreaking to go through the treatments when they don't work, but I remind myself how worth it it will be in the end if they do. If you do go to the re, maybe it would help if your bf could go along with you to the appts. Sounds like the 2 of you love each other alot, I wish you both the best. There really is alot of support here, I hope you are feeling better soon. :angel: em

Thank you both so much for responding. I know I have to keep positive.. it's just so disheartening seeing another negative hpt. I'm beginning to think I may have a mild form of PCOS, I have a few of the symptoms. Now I just need to schedule an appointment :dizzy: Anyway, thank you again and I will be sure to keep you updated!

sunnyside i understand where yout coming from.. me and my dh started trying for a baby when we were 20 well its been 4 yrs and still no baby... we went to see our ob as soon as we got married and my dh has severe mf infertility and they cant figure out a reason why... so we have to do ivf/icsi to get pregnant! i dont ever blame him, and i dont think ur bf should blame u.. whether or not its u not having regular periods, when u try to make a baby it takes 2, u both feel the pain of ttc and u both have to take on responsibility.. i too was scared of thecost etc.. but in some cases it is something small and costless that needs to be done, it can be a diet change, vitamins, hormones to get u regular, every1 who ends up having problems ttc may never need expensive treatment, and if u are having funky periods u should def see a dr... bc something isnt right, and i am lucky to live in a state that pays for a lot of treatment, and diagnosis, so u may be lucky and have some stuff paid for.. but for now if u just go to ur ob for some general infertility tests, that should be covered under ur regular medical insurance.. good luck, and def. get checked out.. it may not be a big problem at all :angel: :angel: :angel: :angel: