my2babies
11-07-2006, 10:14 AM
Hi everyone,
I am new to this board but I found that I have the same thing that you all do. I obsess over my thoughts all the time. Sometimes I obsess over them so much that I just want to die because they wont go away. I feel so bad because sometimes they are about my children and I dont know how to stop these thoughts and its driving me crazy! I would never hurt or harm my babies in any way they are my world. I went to the doctors and he put me on Imprimine. I have been on it for a week now and it seems to be helping a little but the thoughts are still there in the back of my mind. Please tell me im not loosing my mind. :(
I am new to this board but I found that I have the same thing that you all do. I obsess over my thoughts all the time. Sometimes I obsess over them so much that I just want to die because they wont go away. I feel so bad because sometimes they are about my children and I dont know how to stop these thoughts and its driving me crazy! I would never hurt or harm my babies in any way they are my world. I went to the doctors and he put me on Imprimine. I have been on it for a week now and it seems to be helping a little but the thoughts are still there in the back of my mind. Please tell me im not loosing my mind. :(
Sponsor
Emsy
11-07-2006, 10:32 AM
You are not a horrible person ppl that have these thoughts are actually the ppl that would never ever act on them. They are probably the most morally sound ppl. Don't worry i also have those horrible thoughts like that you'll harm your family and they suck :yawn: . But i've been having thoughts like this for alsmost a year and compared to the beginning they are much much better. I hope they will get better over time for you too.:)
daftthing
11-07-2006, 12:58 PM
You are not a horrible person and you are not losing your mind. I know it may feel like it, and you must feel so distressed alot of the time. OCD has a habit of picking on our insecurities and the things we care about the most.
Take Care, and I Hope the medication continues to help things improve for you.
Karen. Xxxxx
Take Care, and I Hope the medication continues to help things improve for you.
Karen. Xxxxx
irishmom1
11-07-2006, 01:23 PM
You are not losing your mind, are not crazy and won't go crazy! I am in the same position as you having thoughts towards my child. If you read some previous posts, there are several parents that have thoughts towards their children. So you are not alone! Are you in therapy or just on medicine by your family dr. It helps in talking out your feelings to a professional who has heard it all before (just my opinion). The best advice I can give you now is see the thoughts for what they are: thoughts. Say to yourself, " I have a medical condition called OCD. It's a chemical imbalance and it's causing my brain to send false messages." In OCD'ers our brain gets stuck and our thoughts won't move forward, they keep playing over and over. Hopefully the meds will help them get un-stuck. Good luck and take care!
my2babies
11-07-2006, 01:34 PM
Thank you all. You made me feel better. I just feel bad because what kind of mother would think like this???? I am not a bad mommy at all.
Irishmom: I wish I could get some therpy but I have to call them in two weeks just to make an appointment. (sigh) I wish I could talk to someone now!
Irishmom: I wish I could get some therpy but I have to call them in two weeks just to make an appointment. (sigh) I wish I could talk to someone now!
irishmom1
11-07-2006, 05:08 PM
TO My2babies and dd112
Please keep strong. I have dark, depressing days but I fight like you do. Our children need us. Just think, the kids don't know our thoughts, they love us no matter what. Keep telling yourself over and over, "these are false messages due to a chemical imbalance". I started reading Brain Lock by Jeffrey Schwartz. Please read it, it will all make sense to you. I'm thinking of you both! Take care.
Please keep strong. I have dark, depressing days but I fight like you do. Our children need us. Just think, the kids don't know our thoughts, they love us no matter what. Keep telling yourself over and over, "these are false messages due to a chemical imbalance". I started reading Brain Lock by Jeffrey Schwartz. Please read it, it will all make sense to you. I'm thinking of you both! Take care.
my2babies
11-07-2006, 05:37 PM
Thank you Irishmom. My kids are the only reason I am living today. I know they need me more than anything in the world. There are days where I would love to just disapear off the face of the earth but then I look at my kids and let myself know that life is worth living with them around. I am going to look up that book. I need something to keep my mind busy so I wont think.:dizzy:
purplegirl1
11-07-2006, 09:36 PM
I don't have children yet but I am married and I have horrible thoughts and doubts that I have "cheated" on my husband - but the cheating only consits of thoughts that I have "kissed" another guy.. it is weird.. I also have horrible thoughts that I have done something sexual to my nephews... you are sooo not crazy! You are soooo not alone!!! Please know that this is all OCD and I totally understand that when you are in the moment, feeling the anxiety, thinking the thought, believing that the thought is soooooo REAL - you must remember it is ONLY A THOUGHT. My therpist who is a Cognitive Behavior Therapist - who by the way is really the type you need to go to with OCD - tells me to exaggerate the thought/obsession until it becomes almost silly and I can somewhat realize the irrational aspect of it. Does that make sense?
my2babies
11-08-2006, 09:02 AM
Thank you Irishmom. It eally makes me feel better to know that I am not the only one. Sometimes I feel like im loosing it.
irishmom1
11-08-2006, 10:11 AM
To My2babies:
Your quote "Thank you Irishmom. My kids are the only reason I am living today. I know they need me more than anything in the world. There are days where I would love to just disapear off the face of the earth but then I look at my kids and let myself know that life is worth living with them around"
THis could have been written by myself b/c I have the same feelings sometimes.
It's the irrational part of our brain talking. OCD'ers are great at beating ourselves up about our thoughts. When you start therapy, you will feel so much better. Just hang in there until you can get an appt. Until then, keep venting on this board. I'm new here and already feel better knowing that others are like me. If you want to talk, post here and put in the subject line "For Irishmom" and I'll reply. Stay strong :angel:
Your quote "Thank you Irishmom. My kids are the only reason I am living today. I know they need me more than anything in the world. There are days where I would love to just disapear off the face of the earth but then I look at my kids and let myself know that life is worth living with them around"
THis could have been written by myself b/c I have the same feelings sometimes.
It's the irrational part of our brain talking. OCD'ers are great at beating ourselves up about our thoughts. When you start therapy, you will feel so much better. Just hang in there until you can get an appt. Until then, keep venting on this board. I'm new here and already feel better knowing that others are like me. If you want to talk, post here and put in the subject line "For Irishmom" and I'll reply. Stay strong :angel:
irishmom1
11-08-2006, 04:34 PM
HI DD112,
That's great you talked it out today. Your therapist makes so much sense. I know it must be comforting to you that there's a reason for these thoughts. You'll feel better as therapy progresses. Believe in what he said. As much time as we put into our thoughts, it will take that much time to feel better. Be patient. Thanks for sharing the info you were given. It's comforting to me and so true. Good to meet you DD112
:)
Let's keep each other updated on how we're feeling. Take care
That's great you talked it out today. Your therapist makes so much sense. I know it must be comforting to you that there's a reason for these thoughts. You'll feel better as therapy progresses. Believe in what he said. As much time as we put into our thoughts, it will take that much time to feel better. Be patient. Thanks for sharing the info you were given. It's comforting to me and so true. Good to meet you DD112
:)
Let's keep each other updated on how we're feeling. Take care