I've had an ED now for the past several months. I am currently trying to recover. This whole thing is completely taken over my life and greatly affected my relationship with my boyfriend. We are both having a difficult time right now getting through this. I was just wondering how everyone else's ed has affected their relationship with their significant others.

I don't have a significant other, but I feel bad for yelling at my dad. lol He brought home those poptarts "go-tarts" or whatever you wanna call them. He was all happy like, "Look, don't you like these? Look what III got..." and I snapped at him horribly like "Don't EVER buy that stuff, take it back, I WON'T eat it, why do you buy that stuff before asking me, if you wanna surprise me get me something HEALTHY.." and blah blah blah. He said okay and that he would just eat them. Later, I searched the cupboards for them cuz I wanted one but he had already taken them in the basement to his "private stash", but secretly I was kinda glad.

And THENN my MOM. I felt so bad too! I'm in the middle of my weight training/cardio sessions and she knocks on my door all politely and stuff, I open the door like, "WHAT DO YOU WANT?" and she asked me if I'd like to go bummin' to the stores with her. I just shook my head no, and immediately felt bad for snapping so I lightened my tone and nicely declined. Then I shut the door, saw the car pull outa the driveway as she left while I was left home alone to do my work out.

It makes me sooo sad to refuse to hang out with my mom because I wanna exercise to lose weight that I don't even NEED to lose. And then I try to justify THAT by using the excuse that exercise also helps to keep the immune system strong, so I drink my OJ and stay fit during the winter.

I don't have a bf either, but I do snap at just about every other person around me. Especially my family, wow, do they take a lot of my c**p! I feel horrible lately 'cuz all I do is snap, snap, snap! UGH! It breaks my heart to see that I could do this.. all for what?

I feel bad that my girlfriend has to put up with my ED issues. I tell her repeatedly that I don't care how she looks, or how much she works out, but I think she feels the need to compete with me sometimes, in terms of eating less than and working out as much as I do.

No matter how much I tell her that my want for thinness is only for myself, I feel that I need to reassure her constantly to keep her from developing a disorder because of mine.

well lostandfading, you posted this and it hit me smack in the face boy have i hurt lots of people with my ed, i've had this for all the years i've had kids, and a husband. i'm always moody, angry, sad, withdrawn, because i'm so wrapped up in ed and how i look all the time and as chookie and sincerity just pointed out to me is all my family wants is me, not how i look, but i am so obsessed with this it always rules over me. i'm finally getting help dec 1, i'm seeing a therapist for the 1st time in 12 years, i want to break free and give my family ME!!!

Congrats Case, I'm so happy and proud of you. I replied on the other message, but 12 years is long enough!!!! It's time for the REAL *you* to shine through!

case1-I am so glad that you are going to seek help. It is scary but soo worth it. sincerety and emlitterell- I too am snapping at people. I just want to be left alone yet at the same time when I am alone I am depressed and miserable. atm_39- my bf will do stuff like that too. talk about losing weight etc. I just keep thinking if I knew then (before I developed an ED) what I know now I would've tried my hardest to prevent it or gotten help sooner. Being thin is so not worth all the crap I am going through right now emotionally, physically, mentally and financially. If I could take it all back I would. I want to be me again. The ed has taken over my life and I want it back.

don't you wish we could all see into the future and see by how our actions can lead to destructive behaviors and how bad it is to overcomethem, and how much easier it would have been to get help in the beginning? but we are all learning from this now, that is why we are here on these boards to support each other, thank god for you guys, i have a safe haven to turn to and spill my guts without being judged, you guys are great!! hope you are all well!! love case