There are so many posts on this site that I can relate to. I feel extremely alone with this illness. But then I feel guilty about being so needy and wanting my family just to take an interest and ask me how I am. I struggle with thoughts, food etc every waking moment. But they only ask when I do something like not eat. They seem to treat me so normally all the time and I feel like screaming that I'm in hell. Also I don't know if anyone can relate but feeling like you have to be the best anorexic in the world and trying to compete seems to at the fore at the moment. A liitle history if I can. I have been referred by my GP to a special clinic (first time). And while I wait I am losing weight because I think if they are going to take me in then I have to be really sick or they will think I'm no good. Also I read about other anorexics and how little they eat, and I feel ashamed because I've never gone a whole day on just an apple or something. Even though they are not 'meals' I do eat throughout the day. Dazed and confused. Any thoughts on my ramblings would be great. Sorry it is so long!

Camilla