well yesterday i had a next step appt, to discuss test results from my 2nd failed ivf, and to see what to do next.. i was hoping they would find something wrong.. some women tell me atleast i know my dh has a low sperm count, so i have a reason for my IF, bc the unknown is very frustrating.. well thats how i feel.. even tho dh has low sperm count, i still have "perfect" ivfs and still no pregnancy.. my re actually said to me that out of every women who had ivf the cycle as me, i had the highest numbers (estrogen/progesterone) etc.. that doesnt make me feel to good, bc they are probably all pregnant! he told me that when they saw that after my transfer my estrogen never got lower then like 350 that they definiltly thought i was pregnant, and there is no reason i shouldnt be pregnant with twins.. that didnt make me feel good tho, it just got me more frustrated.. if there is something wrong, they could fix it or do it different!!! BUT if all the numbers are where they are suppose to be, and my lining is good and no problems there isnt much to change?? they cant make it implant... that is my problem im guessing, but Y?? well, anyway we decided to do a frozen transfer, we have 2 embabies (blasts) to thaw.. i wont start until after my next period.. so that should come in middle of january, then day 20 lupron thenm another period... then estradiol for about 2 weeks and pio, and when im ready TRANSFER.. so i do kinda get a break, and no stimming... but it also seems like a long time to wait. so pretty much there is no way of knowing if i get pregnant until about the beginning of march, but that seems so far away, but it gives me time to lose weight, and drink whenever i want to.. hehe :) anyway thanks for listening, i wanted to get out my frustations, and i know noone would understand better then you guys.. <3 aimee

Aimee,

I am so sorry, that is really frustrating. Although I'm not at IVF yet, I am unexplained too and all my IUIs so far have been "perfect" according to the RE. I too sometimes wish they would find something wrong so they could fix it.

I hope you don't mind me throwing this out there but have you ever considered acupuncture? I started researching it a few months ago and started going about 1 month ago. I was a bit of a skeptic about it but figured it couldn't hurt. So far, I've already seen a positive difference in AF so I know it's doing something. I've read studies where acupunture has had a 50% more success rate for IVF. If you are interested, The Infertility Cure is a good book that has a section on Chinese medicine and acupunture to help with IVF cycles.

Try to have some fun on your break with DH and I wish you much success for your IVF in the new year.

Lori

Aimee,

I am so sorry about your frustration. You actually hit on one of the things that really made me scared about my IVF cycles -- for all of the factors that science can control, there are so many others that science simply can't control. I think that's to explain for "perfect" cycles that don't work, and "imperfect" cycles that go off without a hitch.

If you can, take comfort in the fact that you are doing everything in your power to achieve a pregnancy -- you are controlling all of the factors that you possibly can. And you can't ask more of yourself than that. The rest is up to another power.

I truly believe that success will be yours soon -- the stats (in terms of your numbers/levels from your past cycles and the rates of success for IVF for women in your age group) are REALLY in your favor.

I am glad to hear that your next cycle won't be as hard on you physically (less injections -- woo hoo!) as the others. If you decide to post about it, I will follow along closely. You are ALWAYS in my thoughts and prayers. I've been thinking of you a lot this last week because you've been such an enormous support for me through my treatments and I want more than anything to hear you say that you and DH are finally pregnant. Hang in there, sweetie. I'm sending lots of positive thoughts your way ...

Hi Aimee,

Ditto on what Cubed said, you are doing everything you can!!! It is so hard when you don't have a reason why it seems like all of us responding still have no real answer as to why we have IF. I think science just has not caught up to every IF issue just yet. It seems like more people have IF today then they did in the old days and I wonder why.

Your are so kind and bring so much support to all of us, you desearve to be a mommy and some how some day you will be:) Just keep doing what your doing Aimee, if I recall correctly some-one on the board did get a BFP on her 3rd IVF. I really hope and pray 3rd time around will do it for you!!!!!

((HUGS))

kathy

I would not beat yourself up, and I don't know if this is good or bad but please remember that an IVF is something like twice as likely to fail as to succeed. And you will not be waiting long for your frozen transfer. I would love to have frozen, but I had nothing freezable after two IVFs. It has been almost a year and a half since my second pregnancy MC'd and I am still not yet on my next IVF. So you could be alot worse off.

im not really mad at myself or beating myself up about it, im just frustrated! and i have every right to feel that way.. At my clinic for my age group this yr they had a 75% success rate for implantation, and about 68% live birth rate.. so actually i have more of a chance of it working then not working.. of course i know there is a chance it can fail, which is why i have not given up hope yet.. and since all my IF problems are male related, they take care of that with icsi and the quality of eggs is great and so is all the hormone levels and my lining, so there is nothing different to do this time. thats why im frustrated.. the drs cant make it implant! they dont understand why im NOt getting pregnant.. so im hoping next time, my embabies decide to implant... so i can get past this step, and move on to the next step.. and i dont know if im taking this the wrong way, but please dont tell me it could be worse..im well aware of that.. that is not something any of us really want to hear when we are hurting, there are women who have been thru more then me and women who have been thru less.. none of that matters tho, because we are all in this together.. im hurting and i need support, and thats what i get from most people here.. why havent you had a second ivf?? my clinic only makes me wait a cycle.. im sorry you had to wait that long.. and i will be praying things work out for you..because right now you seem very sad and down.. i hope you have a wonderful holiday!! <3 aimee

Sorry to jump in here but I have to voice something.

I have not been on this board for very long but in my short time here the only negative, unsupportive posts I have read are from you, sharon6. This is a place where most of us come to for positive feedback, support, or just to vent and not have anyone be negative, I think we all have that enough in our lives outside of this board.

I find it so sad that you would actually tell someone here who is obviously hurting and sad that their chances of failure are greater than success. That is not what we come here for. I consider myself to be very lucky to have stumbled upon these women, some of whom are ten times stronger than I will ever be. I appreciate them and support them. I think you should do the same.

If you are hurting or going through a rough patch in IF, then please voice that in a positive manner. We all are here for you as well. I am sorry if I read your post wrong, if that is the case, I apologize in advance. I do not mean to hurt or offend anyone else, as that is not what I am about.

Des

Hi Aimee,

I just wanted to add that I am so sorry if something some-one wrote on the board my have hurt your feelings. You are so sweet and such an inspiration to all of us. I only wish there was a way to take away your frustrations. It just plain SUCKS!!!! I already see that you are hoping for the next time and I think that is great!!!! Please keep us posted!!!

Let's keep up those positive vibes for Aimee she has done it for us many, many times.

++++++++VIBES and ((HUGE HUGS)))

kathy/deluka

thanks guys.. you truly are what gets me thru this!!! and i just hope to return the favor.. and i rarely rarely (may i stress rarely) ever get my feelings hurt here... i just dont think anyone here is looking to be told "things could be worse" that is something we usually here from people who have no clue what its like, so when we here it from a fellow IF women, it hurts more.. we all have a "right" to feel sorry for ourselves sometimes, but we shouldnt be comparing what procedures we have done to someone elses feelings etc etc.. i would never say to someone who already has a child, well atleast you have one, or someone who has gotten pregnant, atlease you know you can get pregnant it could be worse.. i just dont think those words are very supportive.. am i wrong?? im sorry if im going off on a rant, i dont want to pick on anyone, but dee is right ive never felt negative vibes except from sharon6, and im sorry, im not mad i just wish there was something i can say to help, because you never seem to say much that is positive, and i will be keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.. and i hope things turn around for you!!!!! i really mean that.. i too can be pessismistic about procedure, i like to be realistic, bc i feel like ive been let down for years, but im on this board to support these women, and help with any questions that maybe they have or to get my questions that i may not know answered, and i hope it stays that way :) i really do hope we can all ring in some BFPS in the New Year!

Hi Aimee,
I just wanted to let you know that I am thinking of you and I hope that you will soon get your BFP with your frozen transfer...my girfriend just did one in Sept. She had 2 frozen embabies and one did not make the thaw, they transferred the other and guess what....it worked!!!!! She is now 4 months and found out she is having a little boy. So, I truly hope that your dream comes true and this cycle works out for you!!!! Miracles do happen, we just have to always believe that:angel:

It is definitely frustrating when everything in our cycle seems so "textbook" perfect and then we get a BFN:( I have not yet done IVF, but I know that after 6 failed IUIs it is just devastating so I can't imagine how you must feel. You are such an inspiration to me in so many ways....you always have such a positive attitude when going through your treatments, you pick yourself up and get ready for the next step with a positive attitude, and above anything else, you always are here for all of us on the boards with words of encouragement, love, and support and I thank you for that!!!!!

So honey, keep your chin up, and I KNOW that you will be a mommy some day real soon because you deserve it SO much!!!!!!
Love,
cmarie

Hi Aimee,
I hope you're feeling a little better. I know how you feel b/c i'm in the same boat like you. Besides my fellopian tube that are not functioning everything else is in tip top condition yet my doctor could not figure out why im still not pregnant. I'm on my 6th ivf cycle and the last one is a frozen transfer and now im like a sitting duck waiting for the results whether it will be a BFN or BFP on 12/28. It is difficult sometimes for other people to understand our situation. Several people have already told me that maybe it's just not my luck to get pregnant. It hurts a lot but all I can do is to shut them up from my thoughts and think only of the positives stuff and keep praying for a miracle. My prayers may or may not be answered soon but I know deep down I will be a mommy one day. So be strong and stay positive and just remember that one day you too will be a mommy.;)

Tini

Hi Aimee,

I also have unexplained IF. I had 4 cycles of IUI which went bust and 1 ended in m/c. And like you, I too can't understand why my last IUI failed. Timing was right, lining was great, 3 matured follies, sperm count was high and speaking about the RE, he was one of the best in the country. But, I'm not giving up yet. I will continue with IF treatment as long as I can afford it.

Take good care and have a great time while you wait for your next cycle of treatment.

sorry if i confused any1.. i dont have unexplained IF.. my dh has low counts, morp and slightly low motility.. but i feel its unexplained why im not getting pregnant :) becauase they already make the embryo..which is the reason im not gettign preggo on my own, bc dh doesnt have enough to fertilize me.. but then they put it back, and it doesnt stick :( and i have some issues with the fact that the eggs are fertilized and they just dont make it, those are my babies.. does that sound crazy?? we were all embryos once, but we were all little fighters.. !!

Hi Aimee,

I was just doing a little research of my own about nutrition and infertility. There is a lot of information about TTC and nutrition intake you can make as part of your diet to assist with IF. I learned today that we are not allowed to post the web sites. (So if you interested maybe you can do some research of your own). I don't know how much it can help, if at all, but I am going to try it. I already know that I don't take the nutrients I need and DH and I decided to look at what information is out there and found that there are essential vitamins that both partners can take to assist with infertility specifically when having IVF done and when there is a male factor. I was amazed at what I read and I plan to set up an appointment for DH and I to see a nutrionist and start taking additional vitamins I do not get with my and my DH's daily multivitamin. We are both at a normal weight but I will change my diet as well. Ofcourse I will discuss this with my RE before I start and I would suggest you run it by him first too, if you decide you want to try this. I wish I can give you more info but I am not sure what I am allowed to give so I am sure you can find the info if you do a search.

You may have already tried this but just in case I thought I woulld send it. After reading all the info it really made me think of you I wanted to pass the info along. I hope you feeling better :)

luv
kathy/deluka

blueyedsmarty that was the sweetest thing.. you made me cry :( but in a good way.. sometimes i dont know if im saying the right things, and i try never to offend any1... and i feel SOOOOOOOO lucky to have my RE because without him i may not get all of the info i want... at anytime he is available for any "info" i might want about IF.. i come here for my support and to ocassionally vent, and you dont know how much it helps! i remember being a newbie here, and now im soooo sooo addicted to this board lol, there are a lot of new girls around on the board and we will all get our BFP soon, i have hope because almost all of the women who were here when i arrived have moved on (they still come back from time to time) since i came over here, to the pregnancy board.. each and every women on this board has inspired me and given me hope in some way.. we really should right a book for IF awareness, hehe :) anyway, im still a lil choked up, its really nice to hear that i can say something that makes someone else feel good.. everyone please have a HAPPY HOLIDAY and a WonderFUL New YEAR!!! <3 all of you.. Aimee

ASPROUSEY05 I wrote back to you on another thread not sure if you saw it, but anyway, I know exactly how you feel and what you are going through. I couldnt even go to my own sister's kids birthday party! It was too upsetting for me. I didn't go to any of my good friends kids party either.
Don't lose hope. I really thought it would never happen for me. We TTC for 3 years. We had 7 failed IUI's. I had a LAP for endometriosis, which I ended up barely even having any. I had a chemical pregnancy with my 1st IVF attempt and then the frozen cycle, which finally worked! I have an 11 week old son now. They never found anything wrong with me, which was so frustrating. I had every test done in the book and the only thing I had was a high level of prolactin so I took a drug to normalize it. Oh and I had mycoplasma and urea plasma which I had to take antibiotics for. I went to 4 different fertility clinics so I really had every test done over and over again! My DH had low mobility and poor morphology, but not all the time, sometimes his came back great and other times not (he also had plenty of sperm analysis's!). We did ICSI. It was the most frustrating time of our lives. I really thought it would never happen for me. Also one recommendation I did acupuncture before, during, and after my frozen cycle and I really think that may have done the trick. I also stopped drinking coffee and alcohol 100% and I religiously took prenatal vitamins and extra folic acid. They say it helps the pregnancy stick. Who knows I would of stood on my head if that worked!! Oh and one more thing I literally laid in bed for 4 days post transfer. And I prayed a lot! good luck to you on your frozen transfer. 2007 will be your year!! I will be praying for you! Laura