christy217
12-24-2006, 09:50 PM
I feel depressed, elated, sad, pissy, etc, it's seems like all in a matter of a day. My emotions change so rapidly. I consider myself to be an intelligent, caring person, however, there is part of me that makes me feel like a sociopath.
For example, I do have a control problem and this transends to my relationships, currently I am in a committed 6 year relationship with my partner Dawn. She is a wonderful person, I've never met someone nicer I feel I am very lucky to have found someone like her, she has really been there for me through thick and thin and she really does look out for my best interest and our best interest. Sometimes, or most of the time she is a little thick headed, I don't feel intellectually she's on my level. I do feel that she can do better than me, in terms of happiness. We don't like some of the same things to do leisurely and I think that has a lot to do with it.
For Christmas-I am not in to giving gifts, it's not about gifts to me, I did get stuff for my nieces, BIL, and sisters, and my nieces boyfriend. I even made like I always do over 20 baskets for family and friends of baked goodies, etc., I don't ask for a lot in return, I just ask for simple stuff, like this year, I asked Dawn to set a limit on our spending amount, 150 and that was it for each other. She spent well over that, and while it does not hinder our finances it's made me mad. I did not get what I asked for, slippers, silver jewelry cleaner and a hallmark gift card. I got slippers that don't fit a robe that's blue that I didn't want, a bunch of DVDs I did not want, etc. It makes me think that she doesn't know me, so I got pissed. Reminded me a lot of my ex, I put a lot of effort into her gifts and I feel she didn't do it for mine. I am really pissed about it.
I purposefully say mean things to her about her and her family trying to cause her hurt, I do the same thing with my family to a degree. I also get irked at the least little thing she does. *** is wrong with me?
For example, I do have a control problem and this transends to my relationships, currently I am in a committed 6 year relationship with my partner Dawn. She is a wonderful person, I've never met someone nicer I feel I am very lucky to have found someone like her, she has really been there for me through thick and thin and she really does look out for my best interest and our best interest. Sometimes, or most of the time she is a little thick headed, I don't feel intellectually she's on my level. I do feel that she can do better than me, in terms of happiness. We don't like some of the same things to do leisurely and I think that has a lot to do with it.
For Christmas-I am not in to giving gifts, it's not about gifts to me, I did get stuff for my nieces, BIL, and sisters, and my nieces boyfriend. I even made like I always do over 20 baskets for family and friends of baked goodies, etc., I don't ask for a lot in return, I just ask for simple stuff, like this year, I asked Dawn to set a limit on our spending amount, 150 and that was it for each other. She spent well over that, and while it does not hinder our finances it's made me mad. I did not get what I asked for, slippers, silver jewelry cleaner and a hallmark gift card. I got slippers that don't fit a robe that's blue that I didn't want, a bunch of DVDs I did not want, etc. It makes me think that she doesn't know me, so I got pissed. Reminded me a lot of my ex, I put a lot of effort into her gifts and I feel she didn't do it for mine. I am really pissed about it.
I purposefully say mean things to her about her and her family trying to cause her hurt, I do the same thing with my family to a degree. I also get irked at the least little thing she does. *** is wrong with me?
Sponsor
trg247
12-24-2006, 09:57 PM
It could be as simple as being that time of year where the majority of the world is dealing with unwanted stress. As for your relationship, it sounds to me that you are looking for a reason to end it
trg247
trg247
christy217
12-24-2006, 10:07 PM
I think that might be it, as far as finding a reason to end it. Oddly enough, I don't really feel I will ever find anyone as nice or good to me as Dawn. On the other hand, I don't feel like being bothered and then on one hand I feel like I should stay with her because I know if I had cancer and were dying, I just got over colon cancer at 29 btw, I have a genetic mutation, that she would stick through me thick and thin. Isn't that terrible to hang on to someone for something so selfish?
Sannah
12-25-2006, 11:40 AM
Christy, maybe you really do not love Dawn and you really might be frequently irritated with her but you are only staying with her because she will take care of you if you ever need it? What kind of control issues do you have?
christy217
12-25-2006, 10:28 PM
Christy, maybe you really do not love Dawn and you really might be frequently irritated with her but you are only staying with her because she will take care of you if you ever need it? What kind of control issues do you have?
I just like things done a certain way when it comes to some things. I handle the finances, etc., and she just goes with the flow, she has a very laid back attitude! i do not i am a little hyper compared to her, but I am getting better about it.
I just like things done a certain way when it comes to some things. I handle the finances, etc., and she just goes with the flow, she has a very laid back attitude! i do not i am a little hyper compared to her, but I am getting better about it.
trg247
12-26-2006, 02:12 AM
You have spent six years with this person if there has been so many disappointments why are you still there? In any relationship there are going to be problems but are your standards unrealistic? If the shoe was on the other foot would you have stuck with Dawn if she went through your health scare? I have a few mental disorders and my was unwilling or unable to stick around to help me through it and that is fine, she had to do what was best for her and our child. I don't know what I am trying to get to but you really need to sit down with Dawn and see where you stand and hopefully everything will work out on its own.
trg247
trg247