iyami
12-27-2006, 12:29 AM
so, i ahvent been officially diagnosed but im getting there, and both of my parents have extremly autistic-traits, my dads social problems and OCD, and my moms .. everything But social problems, which i seemed to get from both of them.
aspergers to be specific.
and i noticed how i touch things
no w ihate beng ouched, mostly, but thats nto what i mean
liek if i am at a book store, i am very art obsessed i freak over it, so i touch my fingers over all of the books, i know why and hwo i do it but i dont know how to say it
i also painted my dads store window before christmas with snow piles and freyed-snowflakes and i walked up to it and touched each snowflake i could reach without astool, and he kind of stared at me and asked what i was doing and i wasnt sure what to say
is that an autism thing? if it is, why do i touch things like that?
aspergers to be specific.
and i noticed how i touch things
no w ihate beng ouched, mostly, but thats nto what i mean
liek if i am at a book store, i am very art obsessed i freak over it, so i touch my fingers over all of the books, i know why and hwo i do it but i dont know how to say it
i also painted my dads store window before christmas with snow piles and freyed-snowflakes and i walked up to it and touched each snowflake i could reach without astool, and he kind of stared at me and asked what i was doing and i wasnt sure what to say
is that an autism thing? if it is, why do i touch things like that?
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messee84
12-27-2006, 07:16 AM
I dont think there has to be a reason why you do it but yes it does sound like an autisitc behaviour trait. One of the diagnostic criteria I work with is prolonged use of touch to explore objects and often this is coupled with a visual fixation on the object. It is often one sort of object so in your case this is things connected with art, with other people it might be objects connected with trains or simply objects that are yellow.
JoJoLEE
12-27-2006, 05:02 PM
I'm not a professional but maybe I give an opinion. It could be a sensory thing and/ or a OCD thing. I know of some OCD people that have rituals where they have to touch certain items over and over.
Maybe its how you find your center in life. All people do these type of behaviors like: twitch there legs, talk with there hands, bitting their nails, and such things to find there center. That would be their way of concentrating and staying focused.
If you don't like what you are doing and would like find a better way to "find your center" (meaning: finding a way to deal and cope when you are over stimulated) You can always see a therapist who can help you. These things are fixable.
I hope this information can help you some. Like I said I'm not a professional.
Maybe its how you find your center in life. All people do these type of behaviors like: twitch there legs, talk with there hands, bitting their nails, and such things to find there center. That would be their way of concentrating and staying focused.
If you don't like what you are doing and would like find a better way to "find your center" (meaning: finding a way to deal and cope when you are over stimulated) You can always see a therapist who can help you. These things are fixable.
I hope this information can help you some. Like I said I'm not a professional.
iyami
12-28-2006, 01:55 PM
everything i touch definitly has to do with art, usualy i dont conciously notice im touching it, or if i do i dontthink its weird until someone asks me "what are you doing?"
i always twitch my leg, and talk with my hands, and i am a germ-phobe-practically, so i would never ever bite my nails. but i do paint my nails and then chip the nailpolish off over and over, and i pull on my hair.
one otehr question
last night my dad was complaining saying i shouldnt say me or my brother ar ebeing tested for "autism" becuase people will "laugh in my face" becuase normal people take it as "something horrable where someone just rocks back and forth and never speaks"
well then WHAT am i suposed to say?
there is mor ethan one type of autism, and if someone Doesnt know it i can just explain cant i?
someone else (who was dyslexic, practcially spit in my face) told me i shouldnt tell anyone if i ahve any "problems" becuase if i TELL soemone im making an excuse for myself (i dont think aspergers is a Problem, i think its a different way of thinking)
and i MUST not care about who im talking to or what i am saying if i dont spellcheck every single thing i type online
but everyone dyslexic i know, and i know alot, has perfect typeing, becuase the hard part for them is spelling
the hard part for ME is wording, i try very hard to say what i mean the way i mean it (not always successfully) and i figure if im trying that hard and id ont ahve time to ontop of that spellcheck Everything, how is that so bad and not careing?
it seems like people want me to just keep it to myself
but i dont understand why
my friend lanie does, she only told me after i told her, but lanie is a quiet and cynical person, she doesnt tell most people anything at all, so i understand why she would
should i?
i always twitch my leg, and talk with my hands, and i am a germ-phobe-practically, so i would never ever bite my nails. but i do paint my nails and then chip the nailpolish off over and over, and i pull on my hair.
one otehr question
last night my dad was complaining saying i shouldnt say me or my brother ar ebeing tested for "autism" becuase people will "laugh in my face" becuase normal people take it as "something horrable where someone just rocks back and forth and never speaks"
well then WHAT am i suposed to say?
there is mor ethan one type of autism, and if someone Doesnt know it i can just explain cant i?
someone else (who was dyslexic, practcially spit in my face) told me i shouldnt tell anyone if i ahve any "problems" becuase if i TELL soemone im making an excuse for myself (i dont think aspergers is a Problem, i think its a different way of thinking)
and i MUST not care about who im talking to or what i am saying if i dont spellcheck every single thing i type online
but everyone dyslexic i know, and i know alot, has perfect typeing, becuase the hard part for them is spelling
the hard part for ME is wording, i try very hard to say what i mean the way i mean it (not always successfully) and i figure if im trying that hard and id ont ahve time to ontop of that spellcheck Everything, how is that so bad and not careing?
it seems like people want me to just keep it to myself
but i dont understand why
my friend lanie does, she only told me after i told her, but lanie is a quiet and cynical person, she doesnt tell most people anything at all, so i understand why she would
should i?
JoJoLEE
12-28-2006, 11:23 PM
I think its good that you can express yourself and except who you are. No one is perfect and no one is the same. Every single one of us has some sort of Autistic trait and/or some disorder. You like to touch art. Great!:) If you are fine with it and your not harming anyone else, then who are they to judge?
Take this time in your life to find your likes and desires. Make something with your passions and stay focused on being happy. Try not to worry about what others think. Maybe if people see that you are happy and that you accept who you are, then they will too?
P.S.
Tell people what ever you are comfortable saying. Remember, who are they to judge you. Everyone on this earth has some sort of problem.:dizzy:
Take this time in your life to find your likes and desires. Make something with your passions and stay focused on being happy. Try not to worry about what others think. Maybe if people see that you are happy and that you accept who you are, then they will too?
P.S.
Tell people what ever you are comfortable saying. Remember, who are they to judge you. Everyone on this earth has some sort of problem.:dizzy:
iyami
12-29-2006, 02:07 AM
well, thats kind of tricky, becuase im not really like most teenagers, ive known what i wanted for a long time now, between my boyfriend, art, and hopefully becomeing a preschool or kindergarten teacher
actually, ive known sense i was 5, even where/how i want to live and that i want two cats.
and i dont think life revolves around happiness either, dont get me wrong i like who i am, but i dont think anyone sane is happy all the time, its just one emotion, and i dont udnerstand why poeple put such a big enphasis on it
im not worried about what poeple think of my perosnality, its none of their buisness who i chose to be, if they dont like me they can just avoid me, right?
but i want to know why poeple tell me not to say im autistic?
actually, ive known sense i was 5, even where/how i want to live and that i want two cats.
and i dont think life revolves around happiness either, dont get me wrong i like who i am, but i dont think anyone sane is happy all the time, its just one emotion, and i dont udnerstand why poeple put such a big enphasis on it
im not worried about what poeple think of my perosnality, its none of their buisness who i chose to be, if they dont like me they can just avoid me, right?
but i want to know why poeple tell me not to say im autistic?
JoJoLEE
12-29-2006, 09:30 AM
Don't worry about what other people think.
9CatMom
12-29-2006, 10:33 PM
I think it is a great thing that you like to touch pictures in art books. I am a cat lover and, when I look at the pictures of the cats on the cat site I visit, I wish I could see the real thing and pet them.
iyami
01-02-2007, 02:14 PM
actually i ment to say i touch teh spines of the books as i look for certain volumes in the book store, i touch every single book almost, i also touch pictures in them though.
2cutekids
01-04-2007, 10:45 PM
I feel that you touch as a sign of affection. You love art and by touching it, it makes you feel closer to it. Today I got my son (who is almost 7) a book the Titanic, he loves books but was so excited (he has AS also) that he was almost shaking and dancing around the house. He sat and watched TV holding that book. He will carry it to the bathroom and he will look at it first think in the morning before he gets out of bed. He wants to take it to school and show everyone. He got a book from the libiary about the Titanic 2'x already and carried it around for weeks... so to me, it isn't that big of a deal. I love to read, I don't carry the actual books but I do have a little personal PC and it has all my Ebooks on it and I hate to leave the house w/o it. I'm not Autistic.
My son is quarky, he will always BE quarky. My husband has many Autistic tendency's and his father, I SWEAR he is boarderline AS himself.
Telling someoen that you have AS in NOT an excuse, it is a way of explaining that you have a problem w/ communication and expressing your feelings.
Perhaps you can use cards or tell someone, "Please bear with my while I try to explain. I have Asperger and it is hard for me to get the words right" If they are true freinds or really intrested in what you have to say, they will let you collect your thoughts and sort it out in you mind so you can say it.
I see the way my son struggles to say what he means, he is very vocal, but he still gets is sentances and time mixed up.
Autism needs a new face, people like you and my son that have AS that DON'T sit in the corner and rock. That isn't what it is about, some have that, but alot don't. some try to cope w/ everyday life in a world they don't really understand, and one that is too often crule to them. I wish more ppl were like my son. At the age of 7, he still has the innocence of a child. He sees no color, or weight. He loves you for who you are and how you treat him.
I'm not ashamed of his AS and I do tell ppl but soon, it will become HIS choice to tell others if he wants to. He doesn't know he is any different than anyother boy his age, but he does understand that...
"sometimes my brain doesn't work so good" or "It just gets mixed up in my brain"
We have never hid the fact that he has Autism. He knows the puzzle peices and Autism Awareness, but has never really asked about it. My 4yr NT dd did.. "Mommy, what is Autism?" She asked the other day. I told her ... "It is where someone has problems understanding what people say and has a hard time reading other people feelings" what do you say to a 4 yr old... she was fine w/ that answer. I'm sure soemday soon, she will figure out that something is different about her brother but for now, he is the coolest kid in the world. She unfortantaly tends to pick up his speech patterens :(
Don't be ashamed of yourself. You have Autism. You don't see it as a problem, and that is a big step in other's not seeing it as a problem.
Sorry this got so long but I hope it has helped.
My son is quarky, he will always BE quarky. My husband has many Autistic tendency's and his father, I SWEAR he is boarderline AS himself.
Telling someoen that you have AS in NOT an excuse, it is a way of explaining that you have a problem w/ communication and expressing your feelings.
Perhaps you can use cards or tell someone, "Please bear with my while I try to explain. I have Asperger and it is hard for me to get the words right" If they are true freinds or really intrested in what you have to say, they will let you collect your thoughts and sort it out in you mind so you can say it.
I see the way my son struggles to say what he means, he is very vocal, but he still gets is sentances and time mixed up.
Autism needs a new face, people like you and my son that have AS that DON'T sit in the corner and rock. That isn't what it is about, some have that, but alot don't. some try to cope w/ everyday life in a world they don't really understand, and one that is too often crule to them. I wish more ppl were like my son. At the age of 7, he still has the innocence of a child. He sees no color, or weight. He loves you for who you are and how you treat him.
I'm not ashamed of his AS and I do tell ppl but soon, it will become HIS choice to tell others if he wants to. He doesn't know he is any different than anyother boy his age, but he does understand that...
"sometimes my brain doesn't work so good" or "It just gets mixed up in my brain"
We have never hid the fact that he has Autism. He knows the puzzle peices and Autism Awareness, but has never really asked about it. My 4yr NT dd did.. "Mommy, what is Autism?" She asked the other day. I told her ... "It is where someone has problems understanding what people say and has a hard time reading other people feelings" what do you say to a 4 yr old... she was fine w/ that answer. I'm sure soemday soon, she will figure out that something is different about her brother but for now, he is the coolest kid in the world. She unfortantaly tends to pick up his speech patterens :(
Don't be ashamed of yourself. You have Autism. You don't see it as a problem, and that is a big step in other's not seeing it as a problem.
Sorry this got so long but I hope it has helped.
iyami
01-05-2007, 12:00 PM
your exactly right, i think, i also carry around stufed animals andmy scetchbook and stuf Everywhere, ihave this mesenger baginstaid of a purse like normal girls, becuas eit can hold so much stuff, i also ahve alittle change purse i fillediwth "trinkets" you might say that i take Everywhere, i have anabnormal fondness for certain inanimate objects, people alwya sgive me funny if looks becuase if someone would step on one of them id snap out lik e"HEY!! look what you did you horrid prat!! dont you dare ever step on that!" (smetiems poeple have doneit just to be an ***, i still snap but im nicer if its an accident)
mydad carrys ebooks everyone, and he is fryustrated instaid of CDs i spend all my money on books, mostly grpahic novels, andhe asks why i dont just Download them, i tel him its not even closeto the same, i couldnt explain why, but ithik its ebcuase i cnat touchit if its digital, i need the actual pages
my problem has alway sbeen poeple dont WANT to hear what i haveto say, they are right andi am wrong and stupid to these people, espcially teachers, ooh how ive rown to hate half of teh teahcing society, it amkes me almost ashamed to want to get a degree, they think im just a slacker becuas eo fthe way i always smile at peopel no matter what, like im "goofing off" butatcually idont know what otehr expressionsim suspoe dto make so if they dont liek it i decdied i wont even smile, ill just use my natural expressions.
im very frustrated with poeple as a wholelatley, between being under 18, autistic, fibromyalgia, and dressing "over the top" because i am an artist, eople amke the more furiating assumptions aboiut me! i must be a reble, stupid, slacker, ierrsponcible, hypochondriac, etc.
i am not ashamed to be autistic, i am very smart andi Also dont judge on appearences, i mean desh is not my "type" phsyically i couldnt care less, he is perfect to me, a good example. i try never to judge poepel ither, i alwayslike to hav ethe most open mind possible, and even if they are mean a nd nasty to me i wont nessisarilly think they are abad person, becuase its cercomstantial.
people dont belive im native american becuase my skin is so pale, or strong becuase im so tiny, or ihave korean familly because im "white", or that im american becuase of hwo i draw or that i can speak japanese. people even acuseme of plagerising my own art sometimes, soits no big news poeple dont all belive im autistic.
mydad carrys ebooks everyone, and he is fryustrated instaid of CDs i spend all my money on books, mostly grpahic novels, andhe asks why i dont just Download them, i tel him its not even closeto the same, i couldnt explain why, but ithik its ebcuase i cnat touchit if its digital, i need the actual pages
my problem has alway sbeen poeple dont WANT to hear what i haveto say, they are right andi am wrong and stupid to these people, espcially teachers, ooh how ive rown to hate half of teh teahcing society, it amkes me almost ashamed to want to get a degree, they think im just a slacker becuas eo fthe way i always smile at peopel no matter what, like im "goofing off" butatcually idont know what otehr expressionsim suspoe dto make so if they dont liek it i decdied i wont even smile, ill just use my natural expressions.
im very frustrated with poeple as a wholelatley, between being under 18, autistic, fibromyalgia, and dressing "over the top" because i am an artist, eople amke the more furiating assumptions aboiut me! i must be a reble, stupid, slacker, ierrsponcible, hypochondriac, etc.
i am not ashamed to be autistic, i am very smart andi Also dont judge on appearences, i mean desh is not my "type" phsyically i couldnt care less, he is perfect to me, a good example. i try never to judge poepel ither, i alwayslike to hav ethe most open mind possible, and even if they are mean a nd nasty to me i wont nessisarilly think they are abad person, becuase its cercomstantial.
people dont belive im native american becuase my skin is so pale, or strong becuase im so tiny, or ihave korean familly because im "white", or that im american becuase of hwo i draw or that i can speak japanese. people even acuseme of plagerising my own art sometimes, soits no big news poeple dont all belive im autistic.
iyami
01-05-2007, 06:27 PM
i think i made less sense than usual in that post, sense i wasjust wakeing up, very groggy.
bu ti am positive it is an effection thing when i think about it
i do this thing with desh
i takehsi wrist andhold his hand up, so that its eyelevel to me, and then i put my fingertips onto his, and then tip it so its our whoel fingers, then palms, so my hand is flat on his, andi just kind of stare at itwhile i do it
and enver knew Why did it i just liked to
and desh loves it, i asked him why, he said becuase just touching hands like that could mean so much to me and it is somehow inchanting
i dont liek touching very much, so i would not be someone who could snuggle up to him all the time, i guess putting my hand on his like that is my equivalent of snuggling up, i also wont french him, i Hate that texture, spit is too gooey, ew. but he doesnt mind that either. <3
but he knew what i was doing even though i did not, that happens alot, i am so lucky to have someone who udnerstand me .. at all , much less that well <3
i feel like ive gone off topic even though im still on point..
bu ti am positive it is an effection thing when i think about it
i do this thing with desh
i takehsi wrist andhold his hand up, so that its eyelevel to me, and then i put my fingertips onto his, and then tip it so its our whoel fingers, then palms, so my hand is flat on his, andi just kind of stare at itwhile i do it
and enver knew Why did it i just liked to
and desh loves it, i asked him why, he said becuase just touching hands like that could mean so much to me and it is somehow inchanting
i dont liek touching very much, so i would not be someone who could snuggle up to him all the time, i guess putting my hand on his like that is my equivalent of snuggling up, i also wont french him, i Hate that texture, spit is too gooey, ew. but he doesnt mind that either. <3
but he knew what i was doing even though i did not, that happens alot, i am so lucky to have someone who udnerstand me .. at all , much less that well <3
i feel like ive gone off topic even though im still on point..