I was just wondering, there are so many downsides to menopause but are there any upsides even after the menopause has gone ? Surely there must be something, dont they say when one door closes another opens !

no more periods, no more spending money on tampons and pads, no more pregnancy scares, no more pms (hurrah), less body hair so less leg/other areas shaving or waxing. and, when it's all settled down completely, no more hot flashes, sore breasts, wierd feelings, etc., and maybe, just maybe, the return of libido!!!!!!!!
so what did i miss out?

no more periods, no more spending money on tampons and pads, no more pregnancy scares, no more pms (hurrah), less body hair so less leg/other areas shaving or waxing. and, when it's all settled down completely, no more hot flashes, sore breasts, wierd feelings, etc., and maybe, just maybe, the return of libido!!!!!!!!
so what did i miss out?

wow; what an optimist! I'd rather be a hairy, bleeding gorilla than be in menopause. no more weird feelings, you say?? I have Never had more weird feelings/dreams than now.
I say bring back those pads!! That slender, firm body with legs to shave
and pads to apply and cramps to feel and a Big Smile all the time. Oh, how I miss it all. Youth, no double chin, no stomach, lotsa cramps. mmmmm.....:)

susangene, you did make me laugh. i agree, i too would sooner be a youthful, hairy, bleeding gorilla than this saggy breasted, double (hairy) chinned woman whose body i now inhabit. but that's life, and i was trying to be upbeat and optimistic and find at least a few things good about the whole darned thing!

sue

no more periods, no more spending money on tampons and pads, no more pregnancy scares, no more pms (hurrah), less body hair so less leg/other areas shaving or waxing. and, when it's all settled down completely, no more hot flashes, sore breasts, wierd feelings, etc., and maybe, just maybe, the return of libido!!!!!!!!
so what did i miss out?



Ha ha ha ha ha ha I enjoyed that very much. It made me laugh and so true.:)

susangene, you did make me laugh. i agree, i too would sooner be a youthful, hairy, bleeding gorilla than this saggy breasted, double (hairy) chinned woman whose body i now inhabit. but that's life, and i was trying to be upbeat and optimistic and find at least a few things good about the whole darned thing!

sue

I think there are ways to beat a lot of this mess>cosmetic surgery, exercise, diet changes, supplements. Its' the race to youth. Everyone wants to look young again because that's where we were happier. That's what we see on tv. Tall, skinny and blonde with no stomach. So now the big bucks are in surgeries and amino acids/vitamins and exercise. It depends on HOW BADLY we want to look great. But no matter what we do or how much we spend, eventually we'll all look ANCIENT. Did you see poor Mrs Ford at the funeral? I recall she had a facelift decades ago and now she's back to square one. Even Liz Taylor with all her millions looks old (they never show a close up). Suzanne Somers is trying to beat aging but she's only sixty. You can look great at sixty with effort. She's a smart person; she knows that no matter how much money she forks over, at 85 she's going to look OLD.
TIME WILL GET YA. :rolleyes:

yep, comes down to acceptance in the end. i might not like what i see in the mirror these days, but i've definately accepted that this is who i am now. maybe about 10 years ago when all this started (i'm 54) and the grey hairs started appearing, along with some of the peri symptoms, it was like 'oh, no, what can i do to stop it', but now i think 'take me or leave me, this is who i am today'.
don't know about you ladies, but i also seem to have found a way to say what i think, maybe even be outspoken, without feeling i have to apologise for having an opinion that perhaps differs from others. whereas at one time i wouldn't open my mouth, i do now, and guess what? the sky didn't fall in!!!
i think there's more dignity in ageing gracefully, than kicking against it to the point you look ridiculous. there again, it's whatever floats your boat and makes you happy.

sue

yep, comes down to acceptance in the end. i might not like what i see in the mirror these days, but i've definately accepted that this is who i am now. maybe about 10 years ago when all this started (i'm 54) and the grey hairs started appearing, along with some of the peri symptoms, it was like 'oh, no, what can i do to stop it', but now i think 'take me or leave me, this is who i am today'.
don't know about you ladies, but i also seem to have found a way to say what i think, maybe even be outspoken, without feeling i have to apologise for having an opinion that perhaps differs from others. whereas at one time i wouldn't open my mouth, i do now, and guess what? the sky didn't fall in!!!
i think there's more dignity in ageing gracefully, than kicking against it to the point you look ridiculous. there again, it's whatever floats your boat and makes you happy.

sue

I agree. The being outspoken part is pretty normal for SENIOR CITIZENS.
Probably drives men away; I think they like the shrinking lilly types who hang onto their every word as Truth. I'm so glad those days are gone but I had to go thru an AWFUL lot of misery to get here.
Far as looking ridiculous: is it possible, I have no idea, that facelifts only look ridiculous AT FIRST? I ran into an old friend, she's about my age, who had a facelift I was told, and darn it if she didn't look EXACTLY the way she had looked years ago. I felt like an Old Hag talking to that Young Face. I heard she was "too tight" at first but it settled down. This lady married a foot surgeon and got : facelift, porcelain veneers and her veins stripped from her legs. She was on crutches!! And she said during the dental work she was crying!! Some women are just plain tough. Any little TWINGE of pain and I get depressed. Really !

Ok ladies...I've been reviewing this post and getting just as big a laugh from it as you have. We absolutely must keep our sense of humor at this time of our lives. But really, would you honestly trade all the wisdom, knowledge, experience, love, laughs, hard times that you grew from, and memories you have gained over the years, just to be young again? I don't want to loose my health as I age, but I wouldn't trade all my life's experiences, that have given me so much, for anything. Even with menopause, I know I am much more content with my life now than I ever have been.

Keep smiling, chin up (even if it's double and hairy), we are women of dignity! Our attitudes are our good looks!

Ok ladies...I've been reviewing this post and getting just as big a laugh from it as you have. We absolutely must keep our sense of humor at this time of our lives. But really, would you honestly trade all the wisdom, knowledge, experience, love, laughs, hard times that you grew from, and memories you have gained over the years, just to be young again?

ANSWER: after giving it serious thought, my answer is: really, I would honestly trade HALF of the wisdom, experience, love, laughs, hard times that I've GROWN FROM ?? to be young again. Yup. What a rotten way to "grow."
So take away half the wisdom and make me twenty one.

I don't want to lose my health as I age, but I wouldn't trade all my life's experiences, that have given me so much, for anything. Even with menopause, I know I am much more content with my life now than I ever have been.

More content now? How lucky for you. Sort of strange but good for you.
Some "experiences" didn't GIVE me anything but rage, sorrow, depression,
and anxiety. Who needs THOSE experiences?? I'd rather be staring at a wall
in a nursing home humming, "Oh, What a Beautiful Morning....." in wet pants. :dizzy: :dizzy: :dizzy: Then, when receiving a visitor, I'd look up at them and say, "hello; isn't it a beautiful morning?" then keep humming.

Keep smiling, chin up (even if it's double and hairy), we are women of dignity! Our attitudes are our good looks!

i'd have to agree with red maple, i too am very comfortable in my skin now. i suppose this is down to what i said earlier - acceptance. i'm never going to be 21 again (actually, i wouldn't want to be 21 again!!), and that's ok. i do miss having my young family around, and all the fun and laughter we had then. but we only do have our children on loan, and i keep reminding myself that i should be grateful they're independent and doing alright. we (me and my husband) seem to be in a slump at the moment, children grown up and gone, but not yet married and giving us grandchildren. also losing parents over the last 10 years, our family has shrunk and family occasions are not what they were. but i'm sure this will change over the next few years, and meanwhile we are starting to relish our independence and our ability to be 'selfish' and do stuff we always wanted to but either didn't have the money for, or had others depending on us. i know it depends on each persons circumstances, and a do appreciate that i am lucky.

sue

Losing 4 important individuals to death within ten years is not something that has no effect on a person, usually. We've had the same thing happen and it's not only the deaths of our parents but the Extreme Stress leading up To those deaths that really put a light out for me. Two of them went quietly while the other two were into the "courtroom drama/mental institution"
modes that made it Much worse than it needed to be. During this time my beloved friend died from breast cancer treatment at age 50.
Our married kids are Mostly fine; one has major problems in every area.
The grandchildren (7) are a joy, yes. They often do not live near their grandparents if you think about it. We have many friends who fly across the country to visit them, in our case it's a 5-7 hour drive by car. The Partners or spouses they chose are a headache. Not all of them; two of them. So when you see your grandchildren you are taking out to dinner an in-law
that doesn't like you or is just plain rude to you.
If a person says, "I would not want to be 21 again" I wonder about 31?
Would 31 be all that bad?
This morning was spent at a doctor's office. She put my husband on INSULIN. If That alone isn't enough to make HIM wish to be 21 I don't know what it would take.
I cannot think of one single friend we have or person we know fairly well over 70 who doesn't have a Major health issue. 75% of them have pacemakers, one just had 18" of intestine removed and has serious dizzy spells, one has a glass eye from cancer And a pacemaker, I will say that 21 is looking better and better the closer I get to 70 with what I am seeing.
If we did not have any options about his diabetes progressing I would be Much , Much more upset about this. But he is cooperating with the diet plan and we have ordered a new (new to this continent) formula for diabetes called DBcare I am pretty excited about. And I am very grateful for MY EXCELLENT health and I still have all my original teeth lol :D Half my hair has fallen out over the last 5 years but I swear it was too thick to begin with!!!

oh susangene, susangene, you almost made me cry and laugh my socks off all at the same time. i soooo know about all the stuff you mention. i never thought about all this before it started to happen, and then your safe little world just cracks apart and you have to deal with as it changes, day to day. i really wouldn't want to bore you and the rest of the ladies who read this with the details of what happened in this family over the last 10 years, and i'm sure everyone could tell their own story.
but see, back on topic, upsides of menopause, we're all here sharing these things, you made me laugh, maybe i made you laugh too, we're sharing similar stuff and isn't it great? and you're way over there in america, and i'm sitting here in gloomy, cold england. i'm sending you a long distance hug. thanks for making me laugh.

sue

SusanGene, Yes, I TRULY am very content with who I am and where I am in life, hard challenges through the years and all. I really would not trade those years to be 21 again.

I lost both of my parents within 6 months of each other when I was just 38 years old with a newborn at home and working full time to support our family as my husband was building his own business. My father-in-law passsed away 8 months after my parents, and am now caring for my mother-in-law who is in her 80's. My husband and I have had our ups and downs with jobs, financial challenges, teenagers, maritial problems etc., and now menopause and hypothyroidism for me, high blood pressure and prostate problems for him. But still am very satisfied with all I have accomplished, and very content with myself.

I am very sorry for any offence given in my first post. I too was looking on the "upside" of menopause as that is the subject of this post. I did not mean in any way to insult you with my optimism and hope you will accept my apology.

SusanGene, Yes, I TRULY am very content with who I am and where I am in life, hard challenges through the years and all. I really would not trade those years to be 21 again.

I lost both of my parents within 6 months of each other when I was just 38 years old with a newborn at home and working full time to support our family as my husband was building his own business. My father-in-law passsed away 8 months after my parents, and am now caring for my mother-in-law who is in her 80's. My husband and I have had our ups and downs with jobs, financial challenges, teenagers, maritial problems etc., and now menopause and hypothyroidism for me, high blood pressure and prostate problems for him. But still am very satisfied with all I have accomplished, and very content with myself.

I am very sorry for any offence given in my first post. I too was looking on the "upside" of menopause as that is the subject of this post. I did not mean in any way to insult you with my optimism and hope you will accept my apology.

Please. You have absolutely Nothing to apologize for . the world Needs optimists, happy people with smiles on their faces who valiantly carry on.
I am the one who should apologize for throwing cold water on menopause (hey; that sounds refreshing). I lowered my b/p 15pts in 7 days with celery seed capsules (2) and one hawthorn berry capsule . Worth a try. My good friend from childhood has a doc who just keeps doubling her dose of meds. They are not working for her and her sister just had bypass and her mother died of heart disease. She needs to try something DIFFERENT instead of just doubling what isn't working.

I've been following this post and so agreeing with the humorous side and the not-so-humorous. My husband and I have moved a lot in the past 3 years, so I haven't had a lot of friends, especially someone my age in the same peri or menopausal boat to share things with, so appreciate hearing from others on their experiences.

Getting older can be totally "sucky" sometimes, but there are trade offs. The whole wiser thing is worth at least 10 years. Oh yeah, it took my husband and I at least 5 years to figure each other out. Probably a little long, but I married late (37) and was probably already in peri without knowing it and well... you get the picture...And oh, by the way, I'm just a late bloomer. I was really dumb when I was 21. Yeah, I was young and having a good time, but I could barely afford to buy underwear. Now, I can afford to buy all that sexy underwear that I always wanted, but now sits mainly in my drawer! Ha!

My Mom told be (many years ago) that her grandmother had told her once (and she never forgot it) that "you should enjoy every age for what it is". Because I guess that's really all we have. And even though my peri symptoms get me down sometimes, I just count my blessings that it's not something worse!

CRICKEY !!! you lot are making me cry here. Please stop with all the sorrow and make me laugh :)

ok - hairy, bleeding gorillas, dressed in purple with silver shoes, shouting their mouths off and not caring who they upset, throwing down handfuls of herbs and supplements, sweating all over the place, and totally oblivious to everything because of their mind fog - ring any bells? sounds just like me and my sister, and that's on a good day!!!!

sue

ok - hairy, bleeding gorillas, dressed in purple with silver shoes, shouting their mouths off and not caring who they upset, throwing down handfuls of herbs and supplements, sweating all over the place, and totally oblivious to everything because of their mind fog - ring any bells? sounds just like me and my sister, and that's on a good day!!!!

sue

amazing; sounds like me. with the exception of the sweating. No need to sweat if you use bioidentical estrogen/progesterone cream.
Far as mind fog; this worries me. I don't know if its aging (senility as my daughters hope ) or stress. But I've just ordered an expensive WELL STUDIED brain/memory supplement and I can't wait until it gets here because I am forgetting so many things. :dizzy: It has taken me almost a year to remember our 9 mon old dogs' name. I kept wanting to call him the name of our OTHER dog we gave away. No problem , though, w/the female dog's name. :dizzy:

amazing; sounds like me. with the exception of the sweating. No need to sweat if you use bioidentical estrogen/progesterone cream.
Far as mind fog; this worries me. I don't know if its aging (senility as my daughters hope ) or stress. But I've just ordered an expensive WELL STUDIED brain/memory supplement and I can't wait until it gets here because I am forgetting so many things. :dizzy: It has taken me almost a year to remember our 9 mon old dogs' name. I kept wanting to call him the name of our OTHER dog we gave away. No problem , though, w/the female dog's name. :dizzy:

Hi Susan Gene
Let me get this right.

One Word - - - - Freedom!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

NONE. I had freedom!!!!!!!!!! beforehand without the:

age spots on legs, arms , hands
drooping stomach
drooping eyelids
thigh flab
moodswings
loss of hair
weightgain
constant suspected illnesses
shrunken teeth, soft gums
fatigue
thoughts of , "what could have been"
dying and sick friends
fading vision
loss of credibility with children
thinning lips
knees giving out in public
back aches
graying hair
anxiety
well, being a grandmother is fun (-;

Between liverpool sue and susan gene, you have lots of wisdom that only life's experiences can bring. I would like to thank you all for sharing your experiences, thoughts and feelings. I will be 48 years old on March 18th and I can relate to everything each one of you said. :wave:

Another thing to add to the "downside list" is when you're 63 and Totally Healthy, (exercise, vitamin freak)your kids make remarks like you should be looking at tombstones or cemetery markers.
Like, they're salivating for you to kick off. )=: I really don't think kids love their moms like their moms love them; you take what you can get and be grateful for the crumbs like the every ten years compliment.