ScAttErBrAiNed
01-09-2007, 10:22 PM
No one but my therapist and myself seems to believe that I have ADHD, mainly because I do well in school. I spend 4-5 hours a night, on average, sometimes even longer, doing homework every night. I'm applying myself as much as I can. I know I have above-average intelligence, but I don't think I'm the genius everyone makes me out to be. I didn't go into AP US History this year because I take FOREVER to read, and in that class I would have had to read ~20-30 pgs. a night--would've dropped out of school before I would get myself into that mess. So this kid told me he was surprised I wasn't in that class--what am I supposed to say to that?
Everyone figures, so what if I take a "little" longer than I should, as long as I'm doing as well as I am, I should be fine. But no one sees it first-hand; no one knows how I get depressed during regular schooldays/weeks, how much I wish I could just be on vacation all the time, how I hate my every weekday being wake up, go to school, come home, do homework, go to bed. no wonder I'm depressed, all I do is schoolwork, most of which I don't like very much. And it's a vicious cycle; I'm afraid to just do okay in school because school is all I have, and school is all I have because I have no time for anything else. I don't want to just give in and think maybe everyone else is right, because I don't want to go on this way. I think a lot more of my potential would be put to use if I didn't have this problem. It's like I have no life outside of academics. What do I have to do to prove it to everyone--fail in school and drop out? I don't want it to have to come to that. If I spent a normal amt. of time on schoolwork I probably would be failing. How do I get through to people that this is a problem that's interfering with my life and needs intervention?
advice, anyone??
Everyone figures, so what if I take a "little" longer than I should, as long as I'm doing as well as I am, I should be fine. But no one sees it first-hand; no one knows how I get depressed during regular schooldays/weeks, how much I wish I could just be on vacation all the time, how I hate my every weekday being wake up, go to school, come home, do homework, go to bed. no wonder I'm depressed, all I do is schoolwork, most of which I don't like very much. And it's a vicious cycle; I'm afraid to just do okay in school because school is all I have, and school is all I have because I have no time for anything else. I don't want to just give in and think maybe everyone else is right, because I don't want to go on this way. I think a lot more of my potential would be put to use if I didn't have this problem. It's like I have no life outside of academics. What do I have to do to prove it to everyone--fail in school and drop out? I don't want it to have to come to that. If I spent a normal amt. of time on schoolwork I probably would be failing. How do I get through to people that this is a problem that's interfering with my life and needs intervention?
advice, anyone??
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elmhar
01-10-2007, 11:43 AM
Find a licensed psychologist who uses "objective" tests like the TOVA & IVA to assess your attention issues. Phone around to find one who does them. I'm surprised your therapist hasn't recommended you get this done.
Both the Test of Variables of Attention (TOVA) and the Inventory of Variables of Attention (IVA) are normed tests that compare your performance on various aspects of attention, with other people your age.
Objective test results are harder to dismiss than complaints. It's actually quite accepted by many medical professionals that people can do well academically yet struggle with ADHD. So I suspect that a history of mood disorder may be interfering with willingness to recommend a trial of standard ADHD treatment, more than anyone is willing to level with you about.
You may also want to double check that you don't have an ophthalmalogical and/or visual processing issue that is contributing to your slow reading progress. A simple eye muscle imbalance can result in habitual re-reading that is done pretty much subconsciously.
While you're out there phoning around, you might check for psychologists who do neurofeedback for ADHD complicated by other issues. It is a nondrug therapy that can be extremely effective over the long term, for both ADHD as well as "hot areas" of the brain that lead to overactive mind.
Best wishes.
Both the Test of Variables of Attention (TOVA) and the Inventory of Variables of Attention (IVA) are normed tests that compare your performance on various aspects of attention, with other people your age.
Objective test results are harder to dismiss than complaints. It's actually quite accepted by many medical professionals that people can do well academically yet struggle with ADHD. So I suspect that a history of mood disorder may be interfering with willingness to recommend a trial of standard ADHD treatment, more than anyone is willing to level with you about.
You may also want to double check that you don't have an ophthalmalogical and/or visual processing issue that is contributing to your slow reading progress. A simple eye muscle imbalance can result in habitual re-reading that is done pretty much subconsciously.
While you're out there phoning around, you might check for psychologists who do neurofeedback for ADHD complicated by other issues. It is a nondrug therapy that can be extremely effective over the long term, for both ADHD as well as "hot areas" of the brain that lead to overactive mind.
Best wishes.
ohgosh
01-10-2007, 07:51 PM
I think i've got a pretty similar story to yours...im extremely bright but i work sooooooo slow...and well i made a big mistake of just not doing homework...really regret that. I take 72mg concerta...it really helps... i have no wasted time caused by distractions..it definatly helped me
jen1008
01-11-2007, 08:16 AM
I can definitely relate to your story. I always did well in school, A's and B's, but my teachers were always saying how much BETTER I could do if I just "applied" myself more. Apparently I had great potential, but I just couldn't study well enough to get straight A's, and I was miserable. Now during my 3rd try in college, I have been lucky to have a pdoc that understands and I have a script for Adderall (50mgs/day) and I have a 4.0 and graduating in May!!!:)
ScAttErBrAiNed
01-11-2007, 04:38 PM
I took the CPT II in september, done by a neurologist. I was told I have abnormalities with inattention, but it ended at that--I have been jumping from one doctor to the next, trying to find a new one, because my current doctor thinks I have anorexia and won't help me with the ADD (it's in one of my other posts--long story. So I got the CPT II done by a neurologist. Problem is, I would only see him every three months, I'm a teenager, so I don't drive, neither does my mom, and my dad works nights. So I am being told over and over by my mom that this doctor is not practical b/c it's a long commute. My mom has a problem with every new doctor I go to. I just feel so stuck....I've been having problems with my family anyway, ADD-related or not, so what I think I'm going to do next is move in with my aunt and uncle, who I'm assuming will be much more supportive of the whole thing and realize that this really is interfering with my life in more ways than one. Once I'm living with them, I'm hoping to get the appropriate medical care.
Maybe I'll let my grades drop subconsciously, even though I really don't want them to.
Maybe I'll let my grades drop subconsciously, even though I really don't want them to.
mod-anon
01-12-2007, 01:07 AM
Please read and follow the posting rules. Please do not post your age outside of the Teen Boards.
Jennita
01-12-2007, 03:26 AM
So what's wrong with "slow" as long as you get there? And say, didn't the tortoise win the race, not the hare? I'm thinking maybe ADD is simply the result of the near impossible/stressed out society imposed rat race pace we all are expected to live in. No wonder almost everyone has ADD! I'm getting winded just thinking about it all.
IMHO, I wouldn't sabotage my own grades if I were you, however. Why make things worse and/or give up entirely like that? Just do your best and if that's not good enough, dont' worry. Everyone must choose their own path, if it isn't quite as "successful" as some others, so what, as long as you succeed in what you want out of life. Do what you need for your own success, whatever level that might be...variety is the spice and the necessary part of the intricate life we all share here on earth.
IMHO, I wouldn't sabotage my own grades if I were you, however. Why make things worse and/or give up entirely like that? Just do your best and if that's not good enough, dont' worry. Everyone must choose their own path, if it isn't quite as "successful" as some others, so what, as long as you succeed in what you want out of life. Do what you need for your own success, whatever level that might be...variety is the spice and the necessary part of the intricate life we all share here on earth.